The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z
by BananaGirl
Summary: With permission from Camilla Sandman. We're now into Semester 2! Goku's getting death threats, Yoli's birthday is coming up, Bardock makes an appearance and Vegeta and Goku fans are STILL trying to outsmart each other. It could only be OFUD!
1. Agent D, Agent B and Agent Z

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

Chapter 1

   In a small city, not far from a small street was a small house- well, ok, it can't be that small to fit in four people but it sounds good- was a young girl of around fourteen years of age, gently tapping away at a computer in a corner of her dark room.

   "Nadia, you've got school tomorrow, turn off the computer and get to bed." Nadia's mum peeped through her bedroom door.

   "OK mum, I was just going." Nadia said, turning off her monitor and walking towards her bed. When she was satisfied the coast was clear she crept back and switched the monitor back on. "Go to bed. Its only 12:30am." Nadia mumbled to herself, whilst maximising MSWord.

 i The saiyan space pod streaked across a red and blue sky, making a perfect arch before landing with a mighty thud between the trees. Any normal person would've mistaken the noise for a car, a tree falling, anything other than what it really was. However, these people weren't normal.

    "What was that?" Goku asked his friends.

    "I don't know. Lets go check it out." Krillen answered his best friend.

    "Screw this. There is no way this is believable! I mean, c'mon. A female saiyan suddenly arrives when they're supposed to be dead and she's the strongest, prettiest, smartest with an attitude?" Goku complained.

     "Exactly! I am so fed up with people saying I have a soft side! It is extremely out of character for me." Vegeta roared. /i

 Nadia blinked a couple of times, and leaned closer towards the screen. "OK, I did not write that. Of course my Veggie-Chan has a soft side! Of course my characters gonna be the strongest, prettiest, smartest with a bad ass attitude. What other way is there?" She asked her empty bedroom.

       *Ahem*

 Nadia fell off her computer chair and snapped her head upwards to where the cough came from.

    "Holy shit, who the hell are you?" Nadia groaned, she had landed on her arm. Hard.

    "I am Agent D, that is Agent B, and this is Agent Z." Agent D pointed them each out accordingly.

     "Heehee. Cute. Yeah, I get it. DragonBall Z. Very clever. No, who the hell are you, and why are you in my room?" Nadia asked, insanely calmly.

       "Whats this I see? Trying to write yet another original character fic? What is this, your twentieth?" Agent Z asked.

       "Fifty-sixth actually." Nadia beamed somewhat proudly. All three agents looked at each other and formed a circle in the middle of the room, talking in hushed whispers. Nadia slid closer to them to hear what they were saying but Agent B noticed this and warned the other two who simply moved furthur away. "Hey, its my room. You best not be talking about me."

       "Well, we were. Here, we will collect you in precisely…five hours." Agent Z informed Nadia.

        "Five hours?! But its already one in the morning!" Nadia complained. "And besides, pick me up for what?" Nadia eyed the agents suspiciously.

         "Ah yes. You have been invited to enrol in The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z. Fifty-six original character fics do not go unnoticed. If you want to write again, you'll have to pass at least three semesters. Agent D has the enrolment papers." Agent Z answered Nadia.

           "Here. Answer each part truthfully as soon as we have left, otherwise you're dorm will be the University's basement. Good luck, Nadia." Agent D, B and Z disappeared, leaving the enrolment papers to drift softly into Nadia's outstretched hand.

            "Well, they sure know how to make an exit." Nadia muttered, putting the papers on her desk and grabbing a pen. "It'll have to be pink." She muttered, unable to find any other pen. "Lets see…name, Nadia Goodyear. Age, fourteen. Wow. This is pretty easy." Nadia said, scribbling down answers. "Sex (please tick) Male, Female or A-sexual? What the hell?" Nadia furrowed her brow, whilst ticking female. "Species: Human, Saiyan, Namek, Some Unspeakable Horror Able To Wipe Out Earth And Its Inhabitants, Other." Nadia spoke aloud, circling human. It was tempting to circle Namek or Some Unspeakable Horror Able To Wipe Out Earth And Its Inhabitants but she remembered the agents telling her to answer truthfully. She didn't fancy sleeping in a basement anytime soon. "What am I saying?" Nadia asked herself. She was dreaming. It was all a dream. She wasn't filling out any enrolment papers to a Fanfiction University of DragonBall Z. It wasn't happening. But, if it wasn't happening, then why did she have the papers in her hands? And why when, as soon as she'd answered the question 'Do you prefer black, spikey hair or green antennae?' circling black spikey hair, did the papers disappear? And why, when the clock in the hall struck six, did she end up on a soft cloud, destination The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z?


	2. George III, Actually

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Nadia isn't based on me, although I do prefer black spiky hair as opposed to green antennae, namely with a widow's peak ^_^ Sorry this chapter is so short, but it will pick up once Nadia gets into the swing of things.

Chapter 2

"Eeep." Squealed Nadia, wondering why the hell she was on a gold-white cloud with a suitcase wearing a light pink 'Sleepy Teds' nightgown. "Oh. My. God! I'm on Nimbus! How cool! I am riding on Nimbus!" Nadia jumped up.

"George III actually." The cloud replied.

"Holy shit! Since when did Nimbus talk?! Hold up, George?" Nadia asked, confused.

"Yes, George III. I am Nimbus' cousin twice removed on his grand-mother's side." The cloud explained matter-of-factly.

"Oh…you wouldn't, by any chance, be involved with the DragonBall Z University? I mean, I'm just taking a stab in the dark here." Nadia asked, getting sick of hearing about this University.

"Ah yes. You must be Nadia. You will cause quite a stir when you get to the University, I am sure." George grinned. If clouds could grin that is. Hell, they can talk so they must be able to grin, right? Yes, he grinned.

"Ok, I dunno what kinda prank this is and why…holy shit I'm a cartoon!" Nadia shouted.

"I was wondering when you'd notice that." George uttered sarcastically. He was rather sarcastic for a cloud.

 "But…I don't…why…what the fuck?!" Nadia asked all at once.

"Ah yes, the famous quote of all new recruits, 'What the fuck'" 

 "But…why the hell am I a cartoon?" Nadia asked, looking down at her painted hands and feet. A lock of black, un-textured hair flopped over her face as she felt her ears and nose. She could just imagine the squiggly lines where her cheeks should go.

"Well you'd look stupid as a puppet. Ouch! Stop digging your nails into me and I'll tell you. Thank you. Now, since there's gonna be Goku and Gohan and Trunks and Bulma and Chi Chi and Vegeta and…"

 "Vegeta! Did you just say my Veggie-Chan's gonna be there? Wow! Ooooooo! I am so excited! But I'm wearing a pink nightgown! Oh no…" Nadia began working her way into hysterics.

"I will warn you now, he doesn't enjoy being called 'Veggie-Chan'. He didn't enjoy it the first time so I doubt he will the 7398484354776453498274655375577982193993975656374650194176th time. And don't worry. I doubt the headmaster will allow you to attend class in that pink abomination." George added dryly.

"Hey! This is my favourite one! The one with no stains that even Persil can't get out. Ah Persil, the things it can do." Nadia said dreamily.

"I'm sure. Well, here we are." George crash-landed in front of a cast iron gate with huge lettering of 'OFUD' in the middle of each gate.

 "Nice to see how gentle you are." Nadia muttered, dusting herself off and grabbing a suitcase. Her neck rose slowly as she looked at the University. It was cartoonised, of course. A large, black building stood tall surrounded by greenery. A large tree stood alone and a few yards away were a fountain that didn't seem to be working. Two large, dome-shaped things that could only be gravity-rooms stood at either end of the greenery. Nadia was brought back from her exploration when the cast iron gates creaked slowly open.

"Welcome to The Official Fanfiction University of DragonBall Z. Can all new recruits please gather by the fountain and a guide will be with you shortly. Thank you." Came an unfamiliar, feminine voice. Nadia entered and shuddered when the gates swung shut with a large 'cling'.

'Now this is cool' Nadia thought as she made her way to the crowds gathering around the fountain.


	3. Your Guide Mrs Briefs

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Bura-Chan: I am aware DragonBall Z is an anime, being the fan I am. However, Nadia does not. She is shallow and, as stated in the first chapter, writes Mary-Sue's and nothing but (not that I have anything against Mary-Sue's). I don't think she'd know the difference between a cartoon and an anime therefore it wouldn't make sense for her to say 'Holy shit! I'm an anime character!'. Where I write 'cartoonised' I write that because I think 'animeised' sounds like something my dog would eat. Glad to get that cleared up.

Chapter 3

            "Can all recruits with surnames from Abeit to Graham please stay here, and recruits with surnames from Kay to Vekla follow me." A young man with dark hair and a blue uniform with 'OFUD' printed across the back of his shirt called out. Millions of teenage girls and a crowd of boys followed the man around the corner of the University, all dressed in pyjamas and cartoonised. I looked around at the people sitting on the grass and the edge of the fountain also wearing nightgowns and pyjamas, talking lazily.

            "Hey, I'm Mrs.Briefs and I'll be your guide for today." The blonde woman appeared in front of us, her eyes closed, a huge smile on her face.

            "Wow, this is the best dream I've had for a long time." Someone near the fountain said out-loud.

            "Can you please pick up your cases and follow me. Thank you." She said, smiling. Everyone stood up and picked up their cases, following Mrs.Briefs into the University through a small door.

            "Excuse me…um…Mrs.Briefs, why aren't we using that huge door over there? I assumed that was the entrance…" A girl with short black hair asked.  

            "Oh no, that door is for visitors only. Students will use this door and only this door. Come on." She said in her happy voice, walking through the door. All students followed her in a huge crowds, each making 'Ooo's and 'Ahh's. The building was massive; you had to crane your neck as far back as it would go just to see the roof. Four staircases made of mahogany went up, each reaching a different level. Mrs.Briefs stood in the middle of where each staircase met, "Here, are the four main staircases to the University. There are other smaller ones dotted around each level. However, only three of these staircases are accessible to you and I cannot stress how much you must not use this one." Mrs Briefs pointed to the staircase behind her. "The University will not accept any excuses, as you can clearly tell the difference as this staircase has a red carpet, as opposed to the others which have green. Any questions?"

"What if we're colour-blind?" A young boy asked.

            "Are you?" Mrs.Briefs asked.

            "Ummm…no." The boy said, sitting on his case.

            "Good. Any more questions?"

            "What's up that one then?" A boy with ginger hair and freckles, dressed in some spider-man pyjamas, asked.

            "It doesn't matter. Just know it is off limits. Now, this staircase leads to the classes, except gym, which is on this level, up the corridor, and to the left. The second staircase leads to the dining hall where you will have breakfast at precisely 7:00am, lunch at 12:30pm and dinner at 5:45pm. The third staircase will lead to your dorms, and as you are the first half of the alphabet your dorms are on the right. Please do not get the staircases mixed up. The class staircase has a large number '1' on the carpet, the dining hall and kitchen staircase has a large number '2' on the carpet, and the dorm staircase has a large number '9' on the carpet; although I'm not sure why." Mrs.Briefs stated rapidly, and some students had taken out pads and started taking notes.

            "Excuse me, Mrs.Briefs, when we will find out what classes we're taking?" A girl with two blonde plaits and large, blue eyes asked.

            "Ah yes, you have this day free to sort out your dorms, clothes and things. They'll be a short assembly, and when you return to your rooms a timetable with your name on will be in your room's mailbox. Lights out at precisely 10:15pm, no exceptions. Any questions?"

            "Do we have to share rooms?" A boy with light brown hair asked, his eyes looked drowsy.

            "Yes, two to a room. And no, you can't choose who you share with. All right, a number will be attached to your suitcase. That's your dorm room. Please proceed in an orderly fashion to your room and you will be called for assembly later, which is being held in the gym. Bye." And with that, Mrs.Briefs disappeared just as she had appeared. A chorus of numbers went along the students as they ran up the staircase marked '9' and looked for their number.

            "Number 14." Nadia muttered, padding up the stairs, trying to avoid getting crushed by the hoards of students. Doors were opening and slamming shut as she searched for her room. "Number 12, number 14." She said opening the door and screamed.

            "Vegeta or Kakkorrot?" A dark voice demanded, a letter opener poised in the shadows clenched fist.

            "E-e-excuse me?" Nadia stuttered, her eyes narrowing at the letter-opener.

            "I said, Vegeta or Kakkorrot!?" The voice came again, more menacing.

            "Uh…Vegeta?" Nadia stated, hoping her attacker felt the same.

            "Hey! I'm Yoli, your room-mate!" The dark voice switched to bubbly happiness as she laid the letter-opener on a nearby desk. Yoli had shoulder-length red hair, and bright green eyes. She was wearing jeans and a tight fitting, purple T-shirt.

            "Um…hi, I'm Nadia." Nadia greeted her somewhat freaky roommate. She looked around the room, spotting two single beds on either side of the room with two pillows and a duvet on each. The wall by one of the beds were covered in Vegeta posters, all laminated, not an inch of white plaster showing through. Clothes were occupying the wardrobe on that side, whilst the wardrobe on the other remained empty. A pine desk was in a corner of the room, a laptop sat atop it, and a blue chair was pushed underneath the desk. A full en-suite bathroom was adjoined to the bedroom, with chrome taps and showerhead, a fibreglass bathtub and a porcelain sink. Nadia gasped at her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were large and black, and her hair was long and spiky as it cascaded down her back. She had the trademark squiggly lines under her eyes, as she'd expected. She'd have to get used to herself and everyone else like this.

            "Pretty impressive, huh? Wow, you have no idea how glad I am you're not a Kakkorrot fan. We're lucky, the room next-door haven't stopped fighting since they got here. They're Gohan-Trunks girls, and its not pretty." Yoli went on, ducking as a bar of soap fell off the shower as the girls next door threw each other against the wall. 

            "Shouldn't someone do something? They'll kill each other!" Nadia shouted above the noise.

            "You think that's bad? You haven't seen the Kakkorrot-Vegeta clichés. In fact, I'm on my way to cook up a plan for those Kakkorrot losers. You coming?" Yoli asked.

            "Sure." Nadia said, looking around the room. "Just let me get changed first."


	4. You're Big, You're Green

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey! Thanks for the reviews, here's Chapter 4.

Chapter 4

            "But what if we get caught?" Nadia asked for the umpteenth time, swapping her bucket of red paint from her right to her left hand. She was now kitted out in dark, baggy jeans and a huge, red t-shirt. Her raven hair was swept back in a low ponytail.

            "We won't! Anyway, if we did, which I highly doubt, what are they gonna do to us? All we'll get is a slapped wrist at the most. Besides, we'll be back for assembly, I'm sure of it." Yoli reassured her roommate. "Damn, this paint is heavy!" Yoli set down her bucket and rubbed her hands together.

            "Yoli! Don't stop! We've got to get in and out, then be back for assembly." Nadia shouted back to Yoli.

            "Yeah, yeah. Coming. Oh, this will be so cool!" Yoli said gleefully, picking up her bucket.

            "Number 19, right?" Nadia asked.

            "Yeah, that's what Lisa said. 'Two squealing, pink-loving Goku fans next door to me, swooning over the big fool' is what she said. 'It makes me sick'" Yoli imitated the girl they had ran into at the 'Up with Vegeta, down with Kakkorrot' meeting.

            "Well, here it is." Nadia said, setting down her paint outside the door and rubbing her throbbing hands. Yoli walked up to the mahogany door and rapped hard on it.

            "Great, no answer, thanks to that rumour I spread about Kakkorrot being spotted at the fountain every other hour." Yoli smirked, rather scarily, as she produced a large, metallic blue key.

            "Whats that?" Nadia asked, shocked.

            "This, my friend, is the key to every dorm on this side of the floor." Yoli smirked. "It was so easy to get aswell!" She boasted. "Can you believe it was on a hook near the entrance, with a big neon sign above it saying 'Key to all dorms'" 

            "Really? Wow, they must trust us a lot! It kinda makes me feel a bit guilty." Nadia said, and then smirked. "Only a bit though."

            "That's the spirit! Come on, let's go!" Yoli said, unlocking the door and picking up her bucket. She switched on the light switch as she entered, Nadia close behind. The room was exactly the same as theirs, apart from a few personal items and the laptop was blue as opposed to their black. Hairbrushes and hair accessories were dotted around the room, and a few clothes were strewn around on each bed. What really stood out though, was the various-sized posters of Goku, a few with little pink hearts drawn on, plastered everywhere. On every door, mirror, window, wall, wardrobe and even a Goku desktop on the laptop.

            "I'm scared, Yoli." Nadia managed to get out after staring at the walls for five minutes.

            "C'mon, snap out of it Nadia! We're here to do a job, remember?" Yoli snapped her fingers in front of Nadia's face, breaking the trance.

            "Right." Nadia said confidently, picking up her bucket and took the paintbrush out of the back pocket of her jeans. "Lets do this."

            "Alright!" Yoli cheered, collecting her brush and bucket. "You take that side, I'll take this!" Yoli said, commencing to redecorate the room. 

~*~

            "Are you nearly done there, Nadia? We've been ages! Someone's sure to know we're missing." Yoli called to her friend. As if on cue, a large voice boomed over the large speakers in the corridor. 

"What do you mean we have two missing students?! What? Oh! Ahem. Can all students, and I mean all, please make their way to assembly now."

            "Oh crap! C'mon Nadia! We are so dead!" Yoli cried, running out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

            "Shit! Wait up!" Nadia called, running towards the closed door and began pulling on the brass knob. "What the hell? Why won't it open? Oh no, it's locked!" Nadia began pounding on the door. "Yoli! Yoli! The door's locked! I need the key! Yoli!" She cried, but to no avail. Slumping down on the floor, she began picking at the dried, red paint on her hands. A soft, scraping noise on the other side of the door alerted Nadia and she stood up. "Yoli! Yoli! Is that you? C'mon, open up! Its not funny!" Nadia shouted, furiously. Suddenly, the door swung open and she stumbled out as she lost her footing and fell onto the soft, green carpet.

            "Is this her?" A small, high-pitched voice came.

            "It must be. Tut tut. Naughty human." Another, almost identical, voice came.

            "What the…?" Nadia looked up to see two small, blue creatures peering down at her. "Eep! Cell Juniors! Two of you! What are you…?" Nadia trailed off.

            "You should be in assembly, naughty human."

            "Tut tut, naughty, naughty human."

            "I…I…I was just trying to get out of my dorm. It was locked." Nadia quickly made up an excuse.

            "Red paint." The first Cell Junior stated.

            "On your hands." The other said.

            "Why?" Asked the first.

            "I…I…I…" Nadia tried coming up with a story but couldn't think of anything.

            "Aw, naughty human."

            "Painted someone's dorm."

            "Vandalism."

            "Breaking and entering."

            "You know what we do to naughty humans."

            "Yes, the University frowns upon acts like this." A deep voice sounded from behind Nadia.

            "Holy shit! You're green! You're big! You're Piccolo!" Nadia spouted jumbled sentences from her mouth.

            "And you're naughty, you're in trouble and you're coming with me." Piccolo said, looking into the dorm. Nadia followed his gaze and admired her handy work. Across each Goku related subject were the words 'Prince Vegeta 4Eva' scrawled in red paint. "Oh no, not another Vegeta obsessed teenage girl. The things I do." He shook his head whilst hoisting Nadia over his shoulder. "You guys can go back now, I've got everything under control." Piccolo looked at the Cell Juniors, who scowled at him. "Do you want me to get the head-master?" Piccolo threatened, and grinned as the Cell Juniors scurried away.

            "Oh my God! I'm on Piccolo's shoulder! Wow! How cool! Almost as cool as the dream I had where me and Vegeta…" Nadia started.

            "Ok, I don't wanna hear this! Just shut up and hold on." He said, as he took off.

            "Eep! I'm flying! On Piccolo's shoulder! I'm flying on Piccolo's shoulder! Damn, that paint is strong!" Nadia said drowsily, before everything went black.


	5. Vegetaobsessedcrazedlunaticaged13andup

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey! Thanks for the reviews. Please feel free to IM me on ff.net, AOL or MSN. In other words, I am sad and lonely and need someone to talk to! The R on Nadia's letter is for right. So if it was Dorm 14 on the left it'd be Dorm 14L. Here's Chapter 5.

Chapter 5

            "How could this happen, Piccolo? This is what I pay you and the other staff for- to keep an eye on the students. She was painting another student's dorm?! What did she write? Oh no, not another Vegeta obsessed teenage girl. The things I do." A hushed voice awoke Nadia as she studied her surroundings. She was sitting in a small room, on a navy hard-back chair, and the voice was coming behind a closed door in front of her. A shiny, brass plaque was bolted to the middle of the door and it read 'Headmaster's Office'.

            "Oh shit." Nadia swore, rubbing her head, which only managed to smear a streak of red paint across her forehead. The door unlocked as Piccolo emerged. Nadia tried to get a peek inside but he slammed the door before she could. "Um…hey?" Nadia grinned, hoping she wouldn't be in much trouble.

            "Fortunately, assembly didn't start without you. Come on." This time, Piccolo grabbed her collar and pulled her up off the chair. They went through the door and came out onto a corridor with red carpets and a mahogany staircase. The carpet had a figure '0' on, which is when Nadia realised they were on the 'forbidden floor'. 

            "Wow! Isn't this supposed to be off-limits?" Nadia asked Piccolo.

            "Yes, and it still is. You won't be visiting this floor again, understood?" Piccolo grunted.

            "Um…yeah, sure. Of course." Nadia reassured the namek, as they went down the stairs and headed for the gym; where the assembly was being held. They approached two large, double-doors with a sign saying 'Lower Gym' on each. Piccolo pushed open the door, revealing thousands of students seated on brown, plastic chairs. All attention was switched from the front as everyone turned to look at Nadia. Piccolo ushered her to an empty chair, thousands of eyes following her every move. She blushed deep crimson from all the attention.

            "Look at her, taking my Piccolo!" Nadia snapped her head up and glared as she heard someone say the statement with vehemence.

            "OK, now everyone is seated I'll begin. I'm Son Goku and...ah! Ok, ok, ow, stop, my foot! Ow! Who's pulling my hair? Hey, that part is tender! Stop it! Heehee! That tickles…" Goku giggled as all the Goku fans ran over to touch him, and screamed as the Vegeta fans ran over to…well…run over him.

            "Ahhhh!" Thousands of students shouted in surprise as a sudden blue force field surrounded Goku, keeping them all at least a foot away.

            "Now, can you all please take your seat and I'll explain the essential things about the University." Goku said, tenderly rubbing his arms. Waves of disappointment and threats came from the students as they reluctantly sat back down. "Thanks. Right, well, everyone here enjoys writing fan fiction on DragonBall Z. You will need to complete three full semesters if you want to continue writing anything DragonBall Z related. After the three semesters are up, you will have all done the exact same classes, just some of you will have done certain classes in your first semester that others have done in their third. In about five minutes, you will return to your dorms and your timetable will be there. Please do not lose it. You will need basic stationary; pen, pencil, rubber etc. For certain classes you need extra objects, which will be given to you by the professor. Each professor is fully qualified for the class they are teaching, for example, Piccolo will be teaching How To Meditate Without Looking Crazy and Mr Popo will be teaching Cookery. Now, are there any questions?" No sooner had the question left his mouth than thousands of teenage girls shot up their hands. "Um…anything related to the University?" Goku asked, putting his hand on his back and giving his best Son smile. Everyone's hand went down- either from the fact that their questions were more saiyan-related than University-related or that half of the girls had fainted seeing the famous smile. "OK, good. Can the students with dorm's on the right-hand side please leave in an orderly fashion?" Goku asked, furrowing his brow as students stampeded out of the room.

            "Hey watch it! I said watch it!" Nadia shouted, ramming her elbows into anyone who crashed into her.

            "Nadia, my buddy, my pal, my friend, my fellow Vegeta-obsessed-crazed-lunatic-aged-13-and-up!" Nadia heard the unmistakeable voice of Yoli as the girl ran up and put a hand on her shoulder.

            "Fuck off. There was nothing friendly about locking me in a room for two Cell Juniors to attack me and then get shouted at by Piccolo before blacking out." Nadia hissed through clenched teeth, shrugging Yoli's hand from her shoulder.

            "Hey, listen, I didn't lock you in! The door closed behind me and it must've been self-locking! I wouldn't do that! I swear I thought you were behind me! When I realised you weren't, I started to go back for you, but someone grassed on me and I had to make my way to assembly. I swear, I didn't know." Yoli's bright green eyes flashed as she pleaded for forgiveness.

            "Well…I guess its ok." Nadia hesitated, and then grinned at her friend.

            "Good, by the way you have paint on your forehead." Yoli laughed as Nadia rubbed it off  "Now, whats this about Cell Juniors and Piccolo?" Yoli asked, flicking her red hair over her shoulder, grinning devilishly. 

            "Well, it was when you left me. I was pounding on the door, waiting for someone to come…"

~*~

            "Never! Wow! So you've been on the Forbidden Floor?" Yoli asked, envy flashing in her eyes.

            "Yep! Although, I didn't get a good luck." Nadia said regretfully.

            "Well, I heard that it's the floor which has the staff room situated on it." Yoli's voice oozed excitement as she unlocked the dorm with her key.

            "Really? Oh my god! That means…"

            "Yep, Vegeta will be there. But it is like, totally hard to get in. Loadsa girls have tried, mainly Trunks fans, to get in but there's always Cell Juniors on patrol. I swear there's more than there originally was; 8, 9?" Yoli pondered to herself as she switched on the light.

            "Bummer." Nadia muttered as she flopped onto her bed, exhausted. "Where you off to?" She asked as Yoli got up and headed to the door.

            "To get our timetables, stupid! I am so psyched! Ooooo! I hope I get Vegeta. And ya know what? It's a win-win situation! I don't get him this semester, I'll get him next, or the one after that!" Yoli trailed off as she padded down the corridor. Nadia checked her radio-clock she had put on her bedside table. 10:11pm the red numbers glowed. She got up and closed the door, pulling out a large, and grey, over-sized t-shirt and undressed, pulling the t-shirt over her half-naked form. Grabbing a brush from her open suitcase, she brushed her unruly, spiky hair. 

            "Stupid freaky cartoon hair!" Nadia cursed, unable to do anything with it. She grabbed her toiletries and went into the bathroom to brush her teeth.

            "Nadia? You in the bathroom? I've picked up your timetable too, but I dunno what you've got 'cos its in an envelope so hurry ya ass so we can open 'em together!" Yoli called to the bathroom door.

            "Coming." Nadia shouted back, splashing her face with cool water as she emerged from the bathroom. Yoli was already changed into her nightclothes.

            "'Bout time! I hope you don't take that long in a morning!" Yoli laughed. "Here." She thrust the brown envelope at Nadia, which said 'Nadia Goodyear. Dorm 14R. Human.' Nadia opened the letter quickly and pulled out the crisp, white timetable.

            "YES! I got Vegeta, I got Vegeta. I've got classes with the Prince of all Saiya-jins. Naah naah nah nah naah." Nadia danced on her bed.

            "Me too!!" Yoli squealed, jumping up with her friend.

            "Hey! Lights out! Make sure you're at the dining hall for 7:00." A loud voice came through the mahogany wood, as a hand rapped at the door.

            "'K" Yoli and Nadia shouted back, simultaneously.

            "I'll set the alarm for 6:00, k?" Nadia asked, programming her alarm.

            "Sure." Yoli said, snuggling under the duvet of her bed. "Seeya in the morning."

            "'Night" Nadia said, switching off the bedroom light, as she blindly made her way back to her bed and settled down for sleep.

A/N 2: Hey, here is a copy of Nadia's timetable. The subjects with stars next to them are the lessons she has with Yoli:

Monday: Chi Chi 'The Art Of Frying Pans'* (Periods 1 & 2), 

Chibi Trunks and Chibi Goten 'The Fusion Dance'* (Periods 3 & 4), 

Mr Popo 'Cookery' (Periods 5 & 6), 

LUNCH, 

Cell Junior Number 1 'Free Period'* (Period 7), 

Hercule 'Ok, Your Not Strong, But People Don't Have To Know That' (Periods 8 & 9) 

Tuesday: Bulma 'How To Tame A Saiyan Prince'* (Periods 1 & 2), 

Mirai Trunks 'My Comebacks Have No Hidden Meanings'* (Periods 3 & 4), 

Cell 'Parental Skills'* (Periods 5 & 6), 

LUNCH, 

Cell Junior Number 7 'Free Period'* (Period 7), 

Piccolo 'How To Meditate Without Looking Crazy' (Periods 8 & 9) 

Wednesday: Goku 'How To Eat More Than Double Your Weight In Rice'* (Periods 1 & 2), 

Babidi 'Mind Control'* (Periods 3 & 4), 

Vegeta 'Why I'm Better Than All Of You Puny Weaklings'* (Periods 5 & 6), 

LUNCH, 

Cell Junior Number 4 'Free Period'* (Period 7), 

Gohan 'I Saved The Earth And I'm A Scholar-You Can Do It Too'* (Periods 8 & 9) 

Thursday: Frieza 'Sounding Gay Does Not Necessarily Mean I'm Gay' (Periods 1 & 2), 

Chibi Trunks and Chibi Goten 'The Fusion Dance Part 2'* (Periods 3 & 4), 

Vegeta 'The Gravity Room'* (Periods 5 & 6), 

LUNCH, 

Cell Junior Number 3 'Free Period'* (Period 7), 

Videl 'Flying Lessons. And No, You Can't Have Gohan'* (Periods 8 & 9) 

Friday: Chi Chi 'Cooking For Saiyans'* (Periods 1 & 2), 

Yamcha and Pu'ar 'Its Not Strange Having A Talking Blue Cat For A Best Friend' (Periods 3 & 4), 

Krillen 'Why I'm Not Jealous'* (Periods 5 & 6), 

LUNCH, 

Cell Junior Number 6 'Free Period'* (Period 7), 

Muten Roshi 'Something Top Secret And Valuable. Girl's Only'* (Periods 8 & 9) 


	6. Dinner Lady Buu

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey! Thanks for the reviews. Here's Chapter 6, for your viewing pleasure.

Chapter 6

            Nadia groaned and rolled over, trying to find her alarm clock and hit it, to no avail. The static kept playing, as there were no radio signals in the University. Nadia got up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. It was 06:40, and Yoli was already sitting on her bed, fully dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, her red hair scraped back into two pigtails and ready to go. She was looking at her timetable and comparing it with Nadia's.

            "Morning. Guess what? We have periods 1,2,3,4 and 7 together. First up we've got The Art Of Frying Pans with Chi Chi. Then we've got the Fusion Dance with Trunks and Goten, great! I'm gonna pay Trunks to get me some pics of Vegeta sleeping." Yoli said cheerily. Nadia grunted, picked up some clean clothes and went into the bathroom. "Aw, 5 and 6 I've got Goku! Grrr, I'll show him a thing or…" Yoli trailed off as the girls next door went into another screaming frenzy, throwing each other against the wall. "Hey, watch it!" Yoli pounded back as her posters began to un-stick. "Right that's it! You lot are so going to pay!" Yoli called, grabbing a bucket of cold water and left the dorm. She knocked on their door, number 16. 

            "What is it? I'm busy." A high voice came.

            "I have a delivery." Yoli called back.

            "Hang on then." There was a large crash as a small girl with messy, bright pink hair opened the door, adjusting her clothes. "Oh!" The girl squealed as Yoli dumped the cold water onto her.

            "Now will you keep the goddamn noise down?!" Yoli called back, laughing. "And besides, Trunks and Gohan both suck." She ducked as several shoes and an umbrella came sailing past her head. "Nice shot, loser! Ouch!" Yoli entered her own dorm, rubbing her head where the bucket had been thrown at it.

            "What happened to you?" Nadia asked her friend, putting her hair into a high ponytail. She was wearing large, baggy jeans with a huge, red t-shirt.

            "Those bitches next door attacked me!" Yoli cursed.

            "What'd you do to them first?"

            "I only threw a bit of water on them! Don't look at me like that! My Vegeta posters began to come unstuck! Plus, it's so true that Trunks and Gohan suck, I was only telling the truth!" Yoli defended herself as Nadia laughed.

            "Fuck! Its nearly 7! We better get moving!" Nadia said, hurriedly putting on her blue Nike trainers and grabbing her backpack.

            "Come on then." Yoli grabbed her bag, as Nadia locked the dorm door. Lots of girls were emerging from their dorms, dressed and ready. "Right then, where's the dining hall again?" Yoli asked, looking puzzled.

            "Umm…the carpet with a '2' on I think." Nadia answered, starting to ascend on the staircase, Yoli not far behind. They came to a huge door with a plaque similar to the others they'd seen around the school, reading 'Dining Hall'.

            "Hmm, I wonder where it could be." Yoli muttered sarcastically, joining the breakfast queue.

            "Buu get you breakfast. What you eat?" A childish voice asked Yoli.

            "Umm…I'll have Cornflakes please, Mr Buu." Yoli checked out the server's nametag, and did a double check. "Uh…than-than-thanks." Yoli managed to get out as she stood stunned, seeing Majin Buu serve her breakfast.

            "Buu get you breakfast. What you eat?" Buu asked Nadia.

            "T-t-t-toast." Nadia spluttered out. It was too early for this. She nodded her head in thanks, and chuckled as the person behind her exclaimed, 'Wow, I had a dream about Buu in an apron once!'

            "Hey, the people in this school are like, weird." Nadia told Yoli, sitting across from her.

            "Why?" Yoli asked, munching on her breakfast.

            "This guy behind me had a dream about Buu in an apron." Nadia laughed as Yoli choked on her Cornflakes.

            "What a waste of a dream!" A girl with blonde hair, scraped back into a bun, next to her said.

            "Oh, this is Alex. I met her at the 'Up With Vegeta, Down With Kakkorrot' meeting." Yoli said with a mouthful of food.

            "Hi." Nadia shook the girl's hand.

            "Hey. I mean, I personally have dreams about Vegeta." Alex said, with a mischievous smile.

            "Me too." The whole table said in unison.

            "This is the Vegeta table by the way." A girl right at the end of the table said. "We don't associate with people from other groups. It goes against our principles." Nadia simply nodded along.

            "Like, this one time, I had a dream where Vegeta grabbed me from behind. Then I looked into his eyes and he started...*CENSORED*…I swear, it was the best dream I've ever had." Alex smiled, sitting back in her chair. The whole table had stopped eating, and Nadia pushed her toast away from her, she wasn't hungry anymore.

            "Oh yeah, I have dreams like that, 'cept they usually involve Frieza or King Kai." Yoli said, still crunching on her cornflakes and slurping the milk. She quickly stood up as the bell for first period rang, the rest of the table quickly following suit.

            "Yoli?" Nadia asked.

            "Yep?"

            "You worry me sometimes." Nadia said.

            "Wow, you must, be like, the sixth person to say that to me today! How weird." Yoli grinned.

            "Weird. Exactly right." Nadia sighed, following Yoli out of the dining hall and up the carpet marked '1' for The Art Of Frying Pans with Chi Chi. Something told her it was going to be a long day.


	7. Blackmail And Porn

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey! Thanks for the reviews. Lemme just say, I have nothing against Trunks, Gohan, Goten, Piccolo, Krillen, Cell, Frieza (well OK, I hate Frieza), and any other DBZ characters fans. Yoli just takes obsession too far. Oh and, SelestialDemon, you're too cool! Here's Chapter 7.

Chapter 7

            "Hello class. I'm Mrs Son, but you can call me Chi Chi. Today we will be studying frying pans, and the various uses for them…oh, hello. And why, may I ask, are you LATE?" Chi Chi screamed at Nadia and Yoli as they burst through the door, panting.

            "We were…well, we kinda got lost." Yoli explained.

            "Yeah, lost 'cos you saw someone you thought was Vegeta." Nadia glared at Yoli.

            "Hey! He had a nice ass, looked cute in spandex and had the exact same hair!" Yoli defended herself, oblivious to Chi Chi's face turning red…then purple.

            "It was a girl!" Nadia shouted back at her friend.

            "WHEN YOU'VE QUITE FINISHED, CAN YOU PLEASE TAKE YOUR SEATS?" Chi Chi yelled, her face taking on a bluey-green look. Nadia and Yoli sat at the front, the only spare seats available.

            "I guess everyone was nervous about sitting at the front when Chi Chi was giving us a lesson on frying pans." Yoli whispered, then shut up as Chi Chi gave her a hard glare.

            "Now, before we begin class, I should warn you, anyone being taught by my Gohan or little Goten will do well to remember Gohan is married and Goten is only a child!" Chi Chi glared at the various students around the room who groaned with disappointment. "And if I hear of any suggestive comments, or any touchy-feely stuff, I will not be happy…understood?" All students nodded their heads.

            "Excuse me, Chi Chi." A young girl with short, black hair stood up.

            "Yes?"

            "What about Goku?" She asked.

            "Why you little…. You leave my Goku alone!" Chi Chi's face began taking on the bluey-green look again, and many of the students cowered back as she picked up a frying pan.

            "Eep! Nevermind!" The girl sat back down hurriedly.

            "Good, anyone else want to ask about MY Goku?" Chi Chi emphasised on 'my' and smiled contently when no one dared raise their hand. "Now, where were we? Ah yes, frying pans." She said, rubbing her pan tentatively. "Frying pans are the ultimate weapon, both in the kitchen and out. You can fry almost anything with this baby, and knock out the most powerful warrior in the Universe. Now, I'm handing out your very own frying pan. Do NOT lose it, or else I will be forced to show you the importance of them in a 5 hour-long motion picture."

            "Can you say obsessed?" Yoli said to Nadia, who burst out laughing.

            "You! Whats your name?" Chi Chi demanded, pointing her frying pan at Nadia.

            "Nadia Goodyear." Nadia replied instantly.

            "Well, Miss Goodyear, do you want to view the importance of frying pans? I have it on DVD, video and cassette if you like."

            "Um…no. Thanks. I'm fine." Nadia said quickly.

            "Very well." Chi Chi said coldly, slamming two frying pans in front of Yoli and Nadia.

            "I bet she's got one of these up her ass." Nadia whispered to Yoli, who giggled insanely. Fortunately for the girls, Chi Chi hadn't heard.

            "Now, class is almost over. Your homework is to write down five different ways to use a frying pan. Class dismissed." Chi Chi managed to get out, before the students began talking loudly, crashing their chairs and putting their frying pans in their bags. Nadia and Yoli were the first to leave the room, as Chi Chi stared coldly at them, gripping her frying pan tightly.

            "Damn, that woman is scary!" Yoli complained.

            "I know, where to next?" Nadia asked.

            "Opposite the fountain for The Fusion Dance." Yoli consulted her timetable. "I'm all ready." She said, holding up her bribe money for Trunks.

            "You are so dead if Vegeta catches wind of this." Nadia told her friend.

            "Nu uh! I will be one content, innocent, little girl, with naked pictures of Vegeta." Yoli grinned, making her way outside.

            "Oh yes, what every innocent girl wants for Christmas, naked pictures." Nadia laughed.

            "Well, fine. If you don't wanna see Veggie-Chan in the buff…" Yoli started.

            "I never said that! Of course I do!" Nadia shouted.

            "Chill! Of course I'm gonna share the fineness with you!" Yoli smiled, joining the other students by the fountain.

            "Good!" Nadia grinned, sitting on the edge of the fountain.

            "Hi!" Two high-pitched voices came over the masses of students talking amongst themselves.

            "Before you attack us like our first class did…" Goten started, rubbing his head and grimacing as if remembering something he'd rather forget. "…I'd like to remind you my mum is Chi Chi and for those who had her for Periods 1 and 2 will know she doesn't appreciate people…uh…'touching' me." Goten and Trunks heaved a sigh of relief as the students who were about to tackle them sat down reluctantly.

            "Now, lets get down to business." Trunks raised his eyebrows as various girls giggled at this remark, and various NC-17 comments were passed around. "The Fusion Dance is not very easy to learn, and takes a lot of skill from both parties." 

            "We would show you what it was like, but Gotenks isn't very trustworthy." Goten said. Lightbulbs flashed above every single students heads as this remark left Goten's mouth, Trunks and Goten were extremely naïve when it came to teenagers and the lengths they'd go not to be educated. Almost every student with a watch checked the time – it was forty minutes until the end of class, perfect.

            "Aw, that's a shame. I was really looking forward to seeing you do The Fusion Dance aswell." The boy Nadia had seen wearing Spider-man pyjamas on the first day said. He was now wearing a large jumper over tracksuit bottoms.

            "Yeah, I thought you two were cool. But now I see you're just chickens." A girl accused, causing the whole class to break out into fits of chicken noises.

            "Chickens, eh? We'll show you who are the chickens! C'mon Goten!" Trunks said, enraged. Trunks and Goten started doing The Fusion Dance, the students egging them on. A wave of silence washed over the class as a bright light flashed and Gotenks came into view. Everyone cheered.

            "Whats going on?" Nadia asked, waking up from her daydream.

            "Imagining those pictures of Vegeta, huh?" Yoli teased her friend. "We've just persuaded Goten and Trunks to fuse. The plan is; Gotenks won't make us do any work." 

            "Cool." Nadia said, not answering Yoli's former question. The class began throwing paper around, examining their frying pans and a queue of girls had formed, to talk to Gotenks. 'Its like a birthday and Christmas at once, 'cept its Trunks and Goten!' as Lea put it.

            "You think fifty quid will be enough to pay off Trunks?" Yoli asked.

            "Of course! He's only a kid, how much will he want?" Nadia reasoned.

            "Yeah, but we are asking him to take pictures of his dad naked."

            "Better throw in your Game Boy, for good measure." Nadia changed her mind.

            "What? Are you crazy? My Game Boy?" Yoli asked incredulously.

            "Good point, add a few games aswell." 

            "But…my games…" Yoli looked on the verge of tears.

            "Hey, do you wanna see Vegeta naked or what?" Nadia grinned.

            "Ah well, I guess it'll be worth it."

            "Oh, it sure will!" Yoli took on a dreamy look, not noticing Nadia and the others leave for their next lesson

            "Hellooooooo. Earth to…um Goten, what is her name, again?" Trunks' voice broke through.

            "Uh…Yolanda Smelle." Goten snickered, then squeaked as Yoli grabbed the front of his shirt.

            "That's Yoli!" She screamed.

            "Heh…yeah." Goten agreed.

            "Oi, you. Class is over. You gotta get to your next lesson." Trunks said.

            "Yeah, yeah, I have a question first." Yoli said.

            "Well?"

            "Well, ya see, your dad is, like, totally hot…" Yoli started.

            "Excuse me?" Trunks stared at Yoli, wide-eyed.

            "You heard me. Anywho, I'll give you fifty quid if you get me a video and polaroids of him." Yoli asked.

            "Really? Fifty?" Trunks asked excitedly.

            "One thing…they gotta be nude." Yoli raised her eyebrows as Trunks fell over.

            "Hold on, you want me to take nude pics of my DAD? Are you crazy?" Trunks screamed.

            "Hey, say it, don't spray it. Its not like you have to look at anything! Just set up a camcorder in the bathroom before he takes a shower, then give me the tape. In and out, you don't see a thing." Yoli explained.

            "Well…" Trunks mused.

            "Go on Trunks! Fifty pounds!" Pound signs appeared in Goten's eyes.

            "Fine, I'll throw in my Game Boy and two games." Yoli sniffed at her loss.

            "Uh…OK. Deal." Trunks shook Yoli's hand. "I'll bring them over tonight, just before lights out."

            "Great! I'm gonna see Veggie naked! I'm gonna see Veggie naked! I'm gonna see Veggie naked!" Yoli skipped away, singing. Her next class was with Bulma. Oh, how this was going to be sweet.


	8. “Yoli! This is no time to look at his as...

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: OMG! THE Jeril Dragonsoul is reviewing ma stuff? Wow! This is like…crazy! Ok, that sounded queer, but JERIL DRAGONSOUL! *Coughs* Ok, ok. I'll calm down. Here's Chapter 8, enjoy!

Chapter 8

            "Class dismissed." Mr Popo said, taking cover as all the students rushed out of the cooking room to lunch. Nadia sighed, it'd been the most boring hour she'd ever experienced. Mr Popo had taken it upon himself to explain the differences of every single type of rice – and there were lots.

            "Nadia!" Yoli called to her friend, rushing over.

            "Hey!" Nadia greeted back.

            "I've just got outta algebra with Bulma, and we actually do algebra!" Yoli said, with a disgusted look on her face.

            "Huh? What'd you expect to do?" Nadia asked, laughing.

            "Well, I don't see how algebra is gonna help us understand the DragonBall Z universe any better." Yoli argued, heading towards the dining hall. 

            "Well, I just got outta Cookery and it is soooo boring! Oh yeah, how'd it go with Trunks?" 

            "Great! I had to give him my Game Boy and some games in the end…" Yoli started, sounding sad. "But it'll be worth it. Mmmm. He's bringing 'round some Polaroid's and a video of him the shower." Yoli sounded more cheerful, and joined the back of the lunch queue.

            "I was thinking, in Cookery, what about our parents? I mean, they must know we're missing now." Nadia said, a hint of sadness entering her voice.

            "Ha. Don't make me laugh. My parents wouldn't notice if I kept an elephant in my room – nor would they give a shit." Yoli said bitterly.

            "Yeah, but you must miss them?" Nadia asked.

            "Psssh. No way. The only thing I miss is my Game Boy, now that purple-haired brat has it." 

            "Buu get you food. What you eat?" The now-familiar voice of Buu asked.

            "Chips." Yoli answered quickly. She was busy remembering her Game Boy.

            "Buu get you food. What you eat?" Buu asked Nadia.

            "Uh…a tuna sandwich…please." Nadia paused; it unnerved her that Buu would serve her meals. She took her sandwich and followed Yoli to the 'Vegeta table', where Alex and a few others were already sitting.

            "Hey again! This is Tammy." Alex pointed to a girl with short, bright green hair and blue eyes who waved. "And Lauren and Kelly." She pointed to girls, who were obviously twins, with long brown hair and black eyes.

            "Hi." They both said in unison.

            "Uh, hey there." Nadia said back, a little freaked out.

            "Alex! What happened to your eye?" Yoli asked, noticing slight bruising.

            "Oh, well, I've just had a class with that baka Kakkorrot…" 

            "He hit you??!!" Yoli interrupted her, shrieking.

            "No! I was kinda having an argument, saying how we all know Veggie's the strongest, cutest, baddest and down right best when I stood up all of a sudden, fell over the desk and onto the windowsill." Alex blushed crimson as the whole table laughed.

            "Well, you should've showed that Kakkorrot loser a thing or two!" Nadia said, getting a chorus of agreements from the table, which had suddenly filled up.

            "At least he's not an arrogant bastard like that dumbass, Vegeta!" A girl with short blue hair stood up, her table next to them but one, and shouted to Nadia.

            "Hey isn't that…" Yoli started.

            "…Kakkorrot's table!" The rest of the girls finished.

            "You what? Come over here and say that!" Nadia shouted, throwing a piece of her tuna at the girl, hitting her in the forehead.

            "Hey! Don't do that!" Another girl stood up, throwing a sliced tomato in Nadia's hair.

            "That's it! This means war!" Yoli screeched a war shout as she flung several chips at the table.

            "Ahhhh!" Several girls shouted, throwing vegetables and various pieces of fruit.

            "Stupid Kakkorrot losers!"  
  


            "Gay ass Vegeta lovers!"

            "Assholes!"

            "Bitches!"

            "Sluts!"

            "Whores!"

            "Vegeta's whore and PROUD!" Nadia screamed, flinging her orange juice onto them. Unfortunately, she's not a good aim and it hit the table in the middle of all this – the Gohan table, who are known for their extremely aggressive behaviour.

            "Who the hell did that?" One girl stood up, throwing a piece of chicken at the Piccolo table, assuming it was them.

            "What was that for?" A girl with a green jumper, green jeans, green shoes and a green hat stood up, throwing some asparagus. Unfortunately, she wasn't a good aim either, and it hit the Yamcha table. Pretty soon, each table was throwing food to every other table. Seven Buu's were rushing about in all the chaos, trying to mop up the spills, which just came back once he'd finished. After thirty-five long minutes of food throwing, the bell for seventh period rang and all the students split, leaving all the Buu's to clean up the mess in their 'Kiss The Chef' aprons.

~*~

            Nadia groaned as she unlocked her dorm room and flopped onto the bed. They'd just had dinner, which had been 2 hours longer because Piccolo went to great lengths to explain why food fights were a big no-no and went into microscopic detail on how he would punish those responsible – AKA Nadia and Yoli. Thankfully, no one actually knew who started the fight therefore Nadia wasn't ripped limb from limb.

            "Yo Nadia! Whats up?" Yoli entered the room, her usual cheerful self.

            "Yoli, we've just spent two hours listening to Piccolo go on and on about how he'd love to skin us, and then fry our flesh to make a nice omelette. Why are you happy?" Nadia moaned.

            "Because, my naïve little friend, I will be seeing my Veggie-Chan…I mean our Veggie-Chan…in all of his wondrous nakedness in exactly one hour, why else?" Yoli grinned.  

            "Ah yes, I knew there was a reason I'm still alive." Nadia smiled, imagining the pictures.

            "We have to have lights out half an hour before usual because of the food fight, though. Hopefully Trunks knows this or else no naked Vegeta." Yoli looked on the verge of tears.

            "Well, I'm getting ready for bed then. I have no homework due tomorrow – thank God." Nadia said, sitting up and grabbing some clothes. She disappeared into the bathroom.

            "Oh yeah, you'll never guess what!" Yoli called to Nadia. "I swapped someone all of my Game Boy games today for a life-size Veggie cut-out! I figured, since I have no Game Boy anymore, that it was a bargain!" Yoli pulled the cut-out from her backpack – how it fit in there I have no idea – and stood it in the middle of Nadia's and her beds.

            "Wow! How realistic!" Nadia emerged from the bathroom, dressed in a huge, blue t-shirt that reached just above her knees.

            "I know, I fell in love with it as soon as…he's here!" Yoli scrambled to the door as someone rapped on it.

            "Here." Trunks said, handing Yoli a big, brown envelope.

            "Everything's here? The video and photo's?" Yoli asked.

            "Yes. Now hurry. I think he suspects something." Trunks whispered.

            "He?"

            "My dad." Trunks explained.

            "Oh yeah. Ok, thanks. Here's the Game Boy, money and games." Yoli said, taking the envelope.

            "Yoli…" Trunks started.

            "Yes?" Yoli asked.

            "Let go off the Game Boy!" Trunks shouted.

            "Huh? Oh yeah. Heehee. Sorry. Well, bye Trunks." Yoli said, closing the door.

            "Are those the pictures? Open them! Open them!" Nadia said on the verge of hysteria.

            "Oh my God! Wow! These are so worth it!" Yoli's eyes widened as she took out the photos and placed the video by the portable TV they'd discovered behind Nadia's wardrobe.

            "Show me! Show…holy shit! Wow! Oooooo. That's a good angle!" Nadia ogled.

            "I'm gonna go get changed. Be right back." Yoli said disappearing into the bathroom.

            "Oh wow, these are so cool Yoli! We can't tell anyone though 'cos they'll just…I bet its Trunks again!" Nadia said as she heard a knock at the door. "He probably wants more money." She said, on her way to open the door. "I'll pay him double. Man, it's worth it! Trunks, these naked pictures of your da…" Nadia trailed off as she opened the door, seeing Trunks wasn't alone.

            "Is this the girl Trunks? Well, tell me boy!" Vegeta shook his son, holding him up by the collar of his shirt.

            "I…I…" Trunks started.

            "Hey, can I help you?" Nadia asked, trying to seem as oblivious as possible.

            "I believe you have some pictures of me." Vegeta simply stated.

            "Me? Of course not. Why would…"

            "Nadia! Where are the pictures? Veggie-Chan is soooooo hot! Wow, I mean, I've had dreams about him naked and stuff but this doesn't…eep!" Yoli practically screamed as she came to the door.

            "What did she just call me?" Vegeta demanded.

            "She…uh…wasn't talking about you! No! She was talking about her…uh…pet turtle!" Nadia tried covering up, hoping Yoli played along.

            "She dreams of her pet turtle, naked?" Vegeta smirked, knowing he had them trapped.

            "Sure do! Oh wow! Turtles totally turn me on! They're like, so scaly and green! And the way they swim, so slow! Totally erotic!" Yoli went along, her voice an octave higher than usual.

            "Right…" Vegeta looked at them both, unsure of what to think.

            "But I thought you said my dad was…" Trunks yelped as Nadia subtly kicked him in the shin.  

            "Was what, boy?" 

            "Was a jerk!" Nadia screamed, to drown out Trunks' answer. "Yeah, we totally hate you!" 

            "Yeah! We hate the way you smirk…" Yoli took on a dreamy look. "And the way you wear spandex all the time…" Yoli started looking at Vegeta below his neck when talking to him. "And the way you're soooo naked…I mean nasty! Yeah, nasty! We hate your guts! We're Go-Go-Gok-Gok-Gok…" Yoli tried saying.

            "You're Kakkorrot fans?" Vegeta said, disgusted. Nadia and Yoli's face took on a similar disgusted look, but they reluctantly nodded.

            "Check our room if you don't believe us!" Yoli blurted out, then covered her mouth. It was only instinct to try and get Vegeta to go into her bedroom.

            "Yoli!" Nadia hissed, kicking her. Vegeta noticed this and smirked, dropping Trunks who scrambled down the corridor.

            "Very well. We shall see what your room is like." Vegeta pushed open the door, and inwardly gasped. He'd faced Frieza, Cell, Buu, but nothing had prepared him for this – the inside of two Vegeta-obsessed-teenagers-rooms. He scanned the various laminated posters, the life-size cut-out, the laptop desktop, the duvet covers, the figurines and the sketches. Then his eyes dropped to the opened photo's laying on Nadia's bed. He grabbed the photo's before the girls had chance to stop him, grabbed Nadia in his left hand and Yoli in his right and proceeded down the corridor. "You two need to be punished." He said. "No, not the fun kind of punishing!" He shouted, noticing Yoli getting an excited look on her face. Every single student stood in their doorway watching the two girls get hauled away. Some with looks of jealousy on their faces – the Vegeta fans. Others with satisfied grins – the girls at Number 16. No one made a sound, until a loud shout came from down the corridor.

            "Yoli! This is no time to look at his ass!"


	9. Turtle Love

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Here's Chapter 9, enjoy!

Chapter 9

            "Oh yes Mr Vegeta, take a look at our room." Nadia mocked her friend as they sat outside a room on the Forbidden Floor. Vegeta had mentioned something about counselling.

            "Its only instinct to get him to go into my bedroom!" Yoli defended herself. "Besides, you made it seem as if I had a thing for turtles!"

            "Well maybe if you thought before opening your big trap!"

            "How was I supposed to know he was standing at the door? I was excited! I'd just seen him naked for crying out loud, of course I was excited! Now he's taken the pictures. I swapped my Game Boy for nothing!" Yoli hung her head.

            "Maybe we'd have just got a warning from Piccolo, I think he's the Vice, but no! Sex-obsessed Yoli had to get a good look at his ass!" Nadia practically screamed at Yoli.

            "Hello! We're talking about Vegeta here! He was wearing spandex! How could I resist? Anyway, he hadn't noticed until you screamed 'This is no time to look at his ass'!" Yoli screamed back.

"You saying it's my fault? No way! He's a Saiyan! Nothing gets past him! Did you forget that fact when you whispered 'I wonder what punishment he has in mind' and 'I nearly didn't recognise him with clothes on'?"   
  
            "Well excuse me!" Yoli shouted.

            "Yeah well, it was all your fault." Nadia muttered.

            "Maybe so, but you must admit, he sings pretty good in the shower." Yoli and Nadia burst out laughing.

            "I'm sorry about your Game Boy." Nadia said.

            "Yeah, its alright. It was…" Yoli trailed off as the door swung open.

            "Please, come in." A somewhat mysterious, yet recognisable, voice said. Nadia and Yoli looked at each other before entering. The room was rather dark, the only light coming from a corner of the room. Large bookcases were scattered about, filled with books along the lines of 'Children=Bad News' and 'Why Is My Daughter A Bitch?' and various other titles. The floor was made entirely of wood, making it different to the usual scheme of the University. A few posters were scattered along otherwise bare walls, but it was too dark to see clearly. A large desk stood in the centre of the room, opposite were two large, brown armchairs. A plant pot was situated on the desk, in which someone was sitting behind in a hard back wooden chair. The 'someone' pressed a button and the room filled with light.

            "C-C-C-Cell?" Yoli stuttered.

            "Hello Nadia. Hello Yoli. Do you mind if I call you Yoli?" Cell spoke in a soft voice, peering over the top of his glasses.

            "I…guess not." Yoli choked out.

            "Oh, where are my manners? Please, both of you take a seat." Cell offered, pointing at the two armchairs. Both girls complied and sat down. "Now, I see we've had a bit of…trouble, Nadia?" Cell opened a large, heavy book entitled 'Nadia Goodyear'.

            "Uh…what do you mean?" Nadia asked.

            "Lets see; painting another students dorm, bribing, food fights, looking at unsuitable pictures…"

            "Oh, they were suitable all right!" Yoli chimed in.

            "Yoli, are you feeling a lack of attention?" Cell asked, softly.

            "Huh? No. Why?" Yoli seemed puzzled.

            "I will ask the questions. I was addressing Nadia, yet you chimed in with a comment of your own. Are you feeling hurt, angry, upset?"

            "You what? What is this shit?" Yoli didn't enjoy being called an attention-seeker.

            "Ah yes, aggressiveness." Cell ticked a box on his piece of paper.

            "Oh no. He did not call me aggressive. Green boy did not call me aggressive. You wanna see aggressiveness? I'll show you aggressiveness!" Yoli yelled. "Nadia! Let go! Nadia!"

            "Yoli!" Nadia hissed. "This is Cell here. Kakkorrot or Vegeta couldn't destroy him, what makes you think you can?" Nadia reasoned.

            "Nothing, but I'll have fun trying!"

            "Sit down!" Nadia hissed, controlling her friend.

            "Now, as I was saying; Nadia, when did you arrive at the University?" Cell continued.

            "Uh…on Sunday, yesterday." Nadia answered.

            "You arrived yesterday, and you're already having counselling?" Cell asked.

            "Its that dumb, yet incredibly hot, Vegeta! He's pissed at us." Yoli interrupted.

            "Why do you think that is?" Cell asked, writing some notes onto his paper.

            "I have no idea!" Yoli said.

            "How about you Nadia?" Cell asked.

            "I dunno. Probably 'cos we found some pictures of him." Nadia lied.

            "Found? What kind of pictures did you…'find'?"

            "Nothing much." Nadia lied again.

            "Ha. Nothing much. They were a lot more than that." Yoli laughed. "Nah, he was kinda, naked, in them. I dunno why he got pissed. He's got nothing to be ashamed of, believe me!" 

            "And you say you found these pictures?" Cell asked. "Then why did a certain Chibi say you bribed him to take these supposed 'found' pictures?" Cell demanded when the girls nodded their heads.

            "Stupid purple-haired brat! That's it! He is dead!" Yoli yelled enraged.

            "Ah, so you did bribe Trunks?"  

            "No! That's just what she'd say if it'd really happened, which it didn't." Nadia said quickly.

            "How did you know it was Trunks, though?" Cell asked, smiling.

            "You…you said?" Yoli took a stab in the dark.

            "I only mentioned Chibi. I said nothing about Trunks."

            "Whoops." Yoli muttered. "Well, so what? I bribed Trunks into taking some pictures of his dad's naked ass in the shower, and I come back with the full frontal. I'm not complaining! It was fun, and ya know what? I'd do it again!" Yoli cackled, her eye twitching insanely.

            "I'm sure." Was all Cell said as he scribbled furiously onto his paper. "Now, whats this I hear about a Turtle obsession? You find them, and I quote, 'the slow way they swim. Totally erotic!'" 

            "Oh that! I was just covering up so Vegeta wouldn't kick our ass'. Don't worry, your safe…for now." Yoli winked at Cell.

            "Ow!" Nadia said, as she fell off her chair. Cell stood up suddenly, his chair scraping across the wooden floor.

            "Whats wrong Cell, baby?" Yoli's voice went seductive all of a sudden.

            "No…keep away!" Cell screamed, covering his face with his arms.

            "Aw, give Yoli a little hug." Yoli advanced towards Cell, who was looking around for an escape route. The door opened, and Cell scurried out of the room in a blur of green.

            "What the hell got up his ass?" Vegeta demanded.

            "I guess he can't handle us." Yoli grinned. "But you can, can't ya Veggie-Chan?" Yoli was feeling brave after her accomplishment with Cell.

            "I suggest you shut your mouth, brat." Vegeta growled. "Its 10:45pm, counselling is over…forever now, I guess." Vegeta said as he studied the Cell-shaped hole created in the wall. Yoli and Nadia followed Vegeta out of the room.

            "What the hell was all that Cell-mushy stuff?" Nadia hissed to Yoli.

            "Huh? Oh, well he said I was aggressive! Cheeky green asshole! So, I screwed with his head." Yoli whispered back.

            "As you do." Nadia replied.

            "Shhh!" Vegeta hissed at them.

            "Veggie-Chan is mad!" Yoli grinned at Nadia. "Ow!" She yelped as Nadia kicked her.

            "Ecks-nay on the Veggie-Chan-ay. Remember he's a Saiyan-ay?" Nadia hissed in code.

            "You what-ay?" Yoli shouted. "You what?" She whispered, after getting a cold look from Vegeta.

            "Nevermind." Nadia shook her head. Some people were just born dumb.

            "Here." Vegeta said as they approached their dorm. "Lights out now. No food fights either." Vegeta smirked.

            "Huh? We…" Yoli trailed off.

            "I know it was you two. No food fights or else." Vegeta threatened.

            "Hey! We were defending you! Those Kakkorrot losers started it, anyway!" Yoli argued.

            "C'mon Yoli!" Nadia pulled Yoli through the door before Vegeta had chance to beat her.

            "Night Veggie-Chan! You should sing in the shower more often!" Yoli called to Vegeta.

            "Yoli you prick!" Nadia screamed, pushing her friend out of the way as a ki blast came through the door. It hit the wall opposite, just missing the portable TV.

            "Hey, Nadia." Yoli said.

            "What?" Nadia mumbled, getting beneath her duvet.

            "Fancy looking at some naked Vegeta?" Yoli asked.

            "Yoli, I'd love to. But he took the photos. Now go to sleep!" Nadia said.

            "But he forgot the tape." Yoli grinned.


	10. Naked Vegeta comes before compassion

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: A new chapter, already! I must be in a good mood. Nah, I'm never in a good mood. I think my mum snuck some type of pink pill into my Honey Nut Loops this morning. Anywho, here's Chapter 10, enjoy!

Chapter 10

            Nadia groaned and hit her alarm clock. She'd set it later than usual – 06:30am. She'd had four hours sleep, as she and Yoli had been up all night watching Vegeta take a shower in slow motion and reverse, besides having sore thumbs from pressing the pause button so many times.

            "Yoli! Yoli! Oi!" Nadia called, throwing the alarm clock at her friend, which failed to stop beeping.

            "Hey! I was having a good dream aswell!" Yoli muttered sleepily, as the alarm clock shattered on the wall next to her. "No! Vegeta! Aw, are you OK, Veggie-Chan?" Yoli began kissing each poster, where the alarm clock had hit. "Hey, watch the Vegmeister!"

            "What the hell? Vegmeister?" Nadia furrowed her brow.

            "Heehee, trying to come up with an original nick name for my Veggie-Chan, that no one will know. One that, when used, he won't know what I'm talking about." Yoli yawned, and grabbed some clothes. She slammed the bathroom door shut.

            "Yoli, have you seen any of my socks? I swear someone has taken them!" Nadia complained. She was fully dressed apart from shoes and socks. Shrugging, she pulled her suitcase from underneath her bed, looking for some clean socks – she'd run out. "CD's, nope. Fork, nope. Three bottles of aspirin, nope. A bent spoon, nope. Mouldy bread, nope and might I add ew. Aha! A sock!" Nadia took on a triumphant look as she dangled the bright aqua sock in her hand. She crawled around the room on her hands and knees, searching for another sock she hadn't put into the laundry. Finally, she found one hung on the bathroom door handle. It was pink. Nadia shrugged again and pulled both socks on, not caring about the colour.

            "You find some?" Yoli came out, towelling her hair dry.

            "Yeah." Nadia pointed to her feet. "Where the hell are my shoes?" 

            "Where'd you have them last?" Yoli asked.

"I dunno, yesterday at Counselling."

            "You think Cell took them?"

            "What? Cell? No! Of course not. He wouldn't of, would he? I mean, he couldn't of…could he?" Nadia asked bewildered.

            "Nadia, its 7! C'mon!" Yoli grabbed Nadia's arm as they followed the various other students down to breakfast.

~*~

            "So, Cell took your shoes?" Alex asked, taking a bite of toast.

            "And her socks!" Yoli chimed in.

            "He did not! I mean, I dunno who took them." Nadia sighed. She wished no one had asked her why she was wearing no shoes.

            "Weird." Lauren and Kelly said at the same time.

            "So, why are you wearing no shoes and odd socks again?" A boy with brown hair asked. He was the only boy on the Vegeta table, and he was rather slow.

            "Are you deaf or something? Cell nabbed her socks and shoes when she had to have counselling!" Yoli yelled, at the exact same moment the dining hall went quiet.

            "Thanks a lot, Yoli! Now everyone knows what a queer I am." Nadia kicked her friend, turning red.

            "Hey, c'mon." The boy tried to reassure Nadia. "They don't know how queer you are just yet."

            "Shut up." Nadia muttered, banging her head on the table. The other students at the Vegeta table watched in fascination.

            "Well, come along Nadia. Time for How To Tame A Saiyan Prince." Yoli called cheerily, pulling her friend up.

            "Oh yay." Nadia muttered.

            "Nadia! We will learn valuable skills on how to treat and respect men with dignity by trapping them into marrying us because of the lying, deceitful pigs they are!" Yoli grinned.

            "In other words, this lesson is an excuse for Bulma to vent?" Nadia asked.

            "You got it! And I, for one, can not wait to hear every little detail about my Honey-Roast Chicken!"

            "Huh?" Nadia uttered.

            "Honey-Roast Chicken? My new nick name for him?" Yoli asked, hopefully.

            "Yoli, as your friend, that totally sucks. Keep trying." Nadia encouraged her friend as they walked to their next lesson.

~*~

            "Was it my fault the Gravity Room was broken? I think not! It was his fault! He shouldn't be so goddamn pig-headed! And another thing, it was three in the morning! The morning! He expected me to fix it at three in the morning!" Bulma paused to take a breath, a very rare occurrence.

            "How much longer is she going to go on like this? I think I'd prefer algebra!" Nadia moaned.

            "No you wouldn't! We have to do algebra and listen to her rant! I tell you, this is easy compared to the hell I have to go through. You're so jammy, not getting algebra." Yoli complained.

            "No, but I'll get it sooner or later. Which means she'll be even more pissed off!"

            "Oh yeah, I got it good!" Yoli grinned.

            "I think the girls behind me are getting antsy." Nadia glanced at the two girls fidgeting in their seats.

            "Yeah, its Mirai Trunks next, on what he really means when he makes suggestive comments. Ya know that girl behind us?" Yoli asked.

            "Which one, the brown haired one?" Nadia inquired.

            "No, the pink one. She's a bitch." Yoli stated simply.

            "Why?"

            "'Cos she was born like that. Plus it was that bitch who threw them shoes at me, from Number 16!" Yoli hissed.

            "Oh! I guess she's the Trunks lover of the two then." Nadia said.

            "Well duh. I feel sorry for Trunks. All his comments sound a bit gay to me, poor guy." Yoli sympathised.

            "But does he care? No! I try my best, but I can't be beautiful, brainy and a good housewife at the same time!" Bulma's raves began to get louder. The bell rang, and the students began to pack up their things. "Sit down! I haven't finished! I ask him, time and time again, to be a bit more considerate but he just doesn't listen!" Bulma carried on.

            "Uh, miss, the bell's gone." A brave girl stood up.

            "Fine! Go on! All of you! Leave me!" Bulma sobbed as the students stood up, and quietly made their way to their next lesson.

            "What is she moaning about, silly cow!" Yoli scoffed. "Has she seen him naked? I mean, I wouldn't care what he did with a body like that!" 

            "Yoli, you have no compassion do you?" Nadia looked at her friend.

            "I am insulted! Of course I do! I've just got my priorities sorted. My naked schnookums comes before compassion, that's all." 

            "Schnookums?" Nadia asked, pulling a face.

            "Whats wrong with that?" Yoli asked defensively.

            "Its just, the word 'Schnookums' and Vegeta don't really go." Nadia explained.

            "Ah well, a nick name will come to me soon enough." Yoli said, entering Room 8. They sat at the back, as all the front ones were taken.

            "Before-you-all-jump-on-me-I-am-at-liberty-to-warn-you-that-this-blue-light-around-me-is-a-force-field-that-will-send-a-shock-coursing-through-your-body-if-you-attempt-to-touch-me." Mirai Trunks entered the room, a large blue light surrounding him. He spoke extremely quickly before anyone had a chance to jump.

            "Aw, and there was me thinking he was happy to see me." A girl at the front, Gemma, said.

            "Now, we will explore various comments I have made when fighting and explain why they are not suggestive. Why they are not." Trunks stressed the word 'not'.

            "Eh? But I thought you were gay? With Goku?" A boy with black hair stood up, looking confused.

            "No, I am not." Trunks answered, not surprised by the question.

            "What about Gohan?" Another voice chimed in.

            "No." Trunks didn't seem surprised, again.

            "Or Goten?" Came another.

            "No."

            "Or Yajirobe?" Everyone went silent, the girls at the front sending death glares to where that statement had come from – Yoli.

            "What? Yajirobe? No!" Trunks' eye began to twitch.

            "My mistake." Yoli sat down, grinning like a Cheshire cat. A paper aeroplane came flying onto Nadia and Yoli's desk.

            "'U too r so ded'" Nadia read out, looking at the six girls sat at the front, giving them malicious glares. It was going to be a long week.


	11. Poor, Poor Mirai Trunks

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. All Trunks quotes are taken from 'Trunks Shrine' with permission.

A/N: Here's Chapter 11, enjoy!

Chapter 11

            "Now, when I say 'So you wanna see my sword, huh?' What does that mean?" Mirai Trunks asked the class. He was obviously new to this. "You." Trunks pointed to a girl to the left of him, who blushed.

            "That…uh…heehee, well you know!" 

            "What do I know?" Trunks asked, confused.

            "In other words, you mean your dick!" Yoli stood up and shouted as Nadia cringed. It had been the fourth time she'd shouted obscenities that the rest of the class had been too embarrassed to answer.

            "Uh, no, that's not it." Trunks blushed, as did everyone else save Yoli. "It means, 'Do you want to see my sword?' as in, 'I'm going to destroy you with my sword'. Write that down please." Trunks instructed.

            "Psssh. He is totally making this stuff up!" Yoli scoffed.

            "Now, are there any questions? Yes, you in the corner." Trunks asked.

            "What about when you say, 'Please Krillin, just swallow this!'" 

            "Well I think that's pretty self-explanatory." Yoli snickered.

            "And what about when Mr Popo says, referring to the Hyperbolic Time Chamber you and Vegeta are in, 'I hear strange noises coming out of the room'" Another girl asked.

            "Are you saying my Skittles is gay?" Yoli demanded, outraged.

            "Calm down! All of these comments have suitable, non-sexual related answers." Trunks said, blushing at the teenager's dirty minds.

            "Oooo! Oooo! In one episode, Cell goes something like, 'I can have Vegeta any time I want, but right now I want you.' Are you and Cell romantically involved?" A boy asked.

            "No! I despise Cell! However, I can see how that line is misleading, but believe me, it is not sexual." Trunks mouthed the word 'sexual'.

            "'Oh no, my mom's back! Don't tell her about this, please Gohan!' is another one! Trunks, what exactly do you do when Bulma isn't around?" The girl at Number 16 asked, winking.

            "Oh, I…I…its is all explainable!" Trunks stammered, going bright red.

            "Trunks, are you involved with my Skittles?" Yoli demanded, referring to Vegeta.

            "Excuse me?" Trunks tried composing himself.

            "You say, and I quote, 'Father, stop! We have to wait for Goku!' Are you involved with my Skittles? I find that repulsive! Your own dad! And that low-life Kakkorrot! Not to mention Vegeta, uh, I mean Skittles, is mine!" Yoli said, disgusted.

            "OK! No more quotes!" Trunks yelled, covering his ears. "Laalaalaalaalaalaalaalaa." He sang off key.

            "What about when you say…" One girl started.

            "Ahhhhhhh!" Trunks yelled, flying out of the window.

            "Yay! Free period!" Yoli called, just as the bell went. "Aw crap, maybe not. Fuck! Parental Skills in here! Oooo! With Cell!" Yoli took on a devilish look.

            "Yoli, you drove him crazy – literally! We'll probably have a cover or something." Nadia told her friend.

            "Be quiet, brats!" Vegeta stormed into the room, as if on cue.

            "He's gonna teach us Parental Skills?" Nadia asked, dumbstruck.

            "God knows, but I've seen him naked so I'm happy." Yoli's face lit up. Vegeta slammed a case marked 'Parental Skills' onto the desk, causing the Trunks fans to move towards the back. Yoli and Nadia took this opportunity and quickly swapped places. It seemed them two were the only Vegeta fans in the room, as the front row was empty save them.

            "Parental Skills. Uh…did you know you could get pregnant the first…ah!" Vegeta dropped the pamphlet he was reading from. It landed on Yoli's desk, well the one next to her, and a picture of a woman breast-feeding came into view.

            "I think my little Skittles is shy." Yoli whispered to Nadia.

            "Lets see, what else do we have in here…" Vegeta rummaged around the case. "A cucumber, now, what do we do with this?" Vegeta looked confused. He picked up a sheet of paper marked 'Instructions' and dropped the cucumber immediately. A look of disgust covered his face, and he looked slightly flustered.

            "Uh…Mr…uh…Vegeta?" A girl raised her hand. 

            "What, brat?" Vegeta snapped.

            "I thought we were having Cell?" 

            "So did I, until some trouble-maker decided to come onto him, scarring him for life. He is having therapy until furthur notice." Vegeta said, and Yoli took a bow. "Not you two!" Vegeta groaned.

            "Glad to see you remember me, Skittles!" Yoli smiled.

            "Shut it, brat! Screw this, all of you, out to the Gravity Room, now! Last one does one hundred and one press-ups." Vegeta flew off to the Gravity Room, hoards of students running after him.

~*~

            "Now, lets see what you puny weaklings can do. Press-ups, now!" Vegeta barked.

            "I am so dreading tomorrow and Thursday when we have him! This isn't even a proper lesson and it's already hard!" Nadia moaned, attempting to do a press up.

            "Yeah, but he's wearing spandex!" Yoli grinned.

            "Yoli, he always wears spandex!" Nadia laughed.

            "Who always wears spandex?" Vegeta demanded, approaching Nadia from behind.

            "My Skittles." Yoli beamed, thinking she was extremely clever. Nadia kicked her. 'He doesn't know who I'm talking about' Yoli mouthed to her friend.

            "Less talking, more working!" Vegeta walked away.

            "If he found out you were talking about him…" Nadia warned.

            "But he didn't, so lighten up and have some fun here, k? When's the next time you'll be at a University where Vegeta teaches you how to train in spandex and you can bribe his purple-haired asshole of a son to take a nude, and might I add pornographic, video of his dad! Even if he stabs you in the back and grasses on you! Oh, just you wait 'til Thursday, the purple-haired wonder is dead." Yoli threatened.

            "I bet all you weaklings are wondering what gravity this room is set at? Any guesses?" Vegeta smirked.

            "Two hundred!" A boy shouted from the corner.

            "Ha!" Vegeta scoffed. "Lower!"

            "One hundred!" A girl shouted.

            "Lower." Vegeta yawned.

            "Fifty?" Someone asked, uncertainly. 

            "Lower." Vegeta began smirking again.

            "Ten!" A girl laughed at the stupid possibility of ten, then abruptly stopped when she heard Vegeta's answer.

            "Lower!"

            "What?" The majority of the students stopped working and looked at Vegeta incredulously.

            "Zero." Vegeta gave a self-satisfied grin. "You are working at zero times Earth's gravity. Zero!" Vegeta's voice boomed around the chamber.

            "Don't we feel special?" Nadia muttered.

            "Hey, I just got an idea! How about we sell copies of that videotape of Vegeta? We'll make thousands!" Yoli's eyes lit up.

            "No way!" Nadia objected. "Vegeta will find out, and then…" Nadia made a slicing motion across her throat.

            "Fine, spoilt sport." Yoli sulked.

            "Can the girl that is hoping to follow in Roshi's footsteps as a pervert and her friend with an erotic fascination for turtles please stand up!" Vegeta ordered rather than asked. Yoli and Nadia stood up immediately. Nadia blushed crimson, Yoli didn't, nothing embarrassed her. 

            "Yep? What can we do for ya?" Yoli asked casually.

            "You can start by shutting your mouth, brat!" Vegeta screamed, the vein on his forehead becoming prominent. "Out to the front. I want you two to do five press ups." 

            "Five? Easy as shit! What do we get out of it?" Yoli boasted.

            "You succeed, I will give you anything you want." Vegeta smirked.

            "Anything?" Yoli raised an eyebrow, grinning devilishly.

            "Stupid teenager minds. Need a good cleaning out." Vegeta mumbled. "Yes, anything." Vegeta smirked, knowing he would win the bet.

            "Great! And if we lose, which we won't, you can…um…" Yoli began to think, something that hurt like hell.

            "I will see you both at my calling as my personal slaves." Vegeta's smirk grew wider.

            "Deal!" Yoli agreed.

            "Yoli!" Nadia protested. "I can't do press ups!" She hissed.

            "C'mon, only five and we get anything!" Yoli glanced at Vegeta. "Please?"

            "Fine, but only 'cos anything sounds pretty good to me." Nadia grinned.

            "OK, five press ups. Woah, hold up." Vegeta smirked as Yoli and Nadia gave him a puzzled look from where they'd started their press ups. "I need to set the gravity first."

            "But…oof!" Nadia and Yoli said in unison, as their bodies hit the floor and they couldn't move.


	12. 3 Bottles Of Aspirin

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey, if anyone else would like a part in this fic just mention it in the review and I'll do what I can. Anywho, here's Chapter 12, enjoy!

Chapter 12

   Vegeta smirked as he looked at the hoard of students gasping for breath, pressed against the Gravity Room floor.

            "You…dirty…little…cheater!" Yoli managed to spit out between gasps.

            "We never agreed on the gravity. You shouldn't assume things." Vegeta smirked.

            "Yeah…but…" Nadia trailed off. 

            "Exactly. A deal's a deal. I'll see you at 4:30am tomorrow morning." Vegeta said, an evil glint in his eyes.

            "What? I'll be like, asleep! Aw…fuck." Yoli groaned, attempting to do a press up and failing. Occasional moans and gasps could be heard from the other students (A/N: not like that you dirty minded people!).

            "Bloody hell!" Nadia sat up and caught her breath as Vegeta turned off the gravity. Yoli and the other students breathed a sigh of relief and sat there silently.

            "Now, weaklings, do you want to know what gravity that was at?" Vegeta smirked yet again. 

            "Like we give a shit." Yoli muttered sourly. She wasn't a good loser.

            "I'll tell you anyway…" Vegeta took a dramatic pause. "It was 0.003. 0.003 times Earth's gravity and you could barely breathe!" Vegeta cackled evilly.

            "That's impossible!" The girl from Number 16 stated, her face red and puffy.

            "Are you calling me a liar, baka? I got the damn onna to do it! I know how weak you earthlings really are, so I got her to upgrade it." Vegeta explained with malice.

            "He's just pissed 'cos I've seen him naked." Yoli whispered to Nadia. "Sorry Skittles." Yoli apologised, noticing the low growl and death glare he sent her way.

            "No matter. You'll simply have to make it up to me tomorrow." Vegeta smirked.

            "Eh? You what?" Yoli asked excitedly, not understanding his meaning.

            "Grrr. Dirty minded teenage baka's! I mean when you will personally serve me."

            "Aw. Don't be sad Yoli, it could happen." Nadia nudged her friend and winked.

            "Ah well, I still have my NC17-rated dreams to look forward to."

            "I did not need to know that!" Vegeta yelled, causing everyone to cover his or her ears. "You will not have anymore dreams about me, foolish earthling."

            "I wish it was that simple, Skittles." Yoli said in mock sadness.

            "Grrr."

            "C'mon Yoli, before you get beaten to a pulp!" Nadia pulled her friend up as the bell for lunch went.

 ~*~

            "…So then I go to Bob…hello? My face is here! What are you guys looking at?" Nadia asked, turning around and coming face to face with the Saiyan Prince.

            "Oh…my…God." Alex muttered.

            "Hey Skittles! Whats up?" Yoli asked, her usual ignorant self.

            "Shut up, baka." Vegeta growled, and sat down between Nadia and Yoli.

            "Uh…" Mike, the only boy at the table, began.

            "Not a word!" Vegeta warned as Buu came over and sat truckloads of food on the table, all for Vegeta.

            "Shit, you're gonna eat all that?" Nadia exclaimed.

            "Yes, got a problem?" Vegeta snapped.

            "Uh…no." Nadia took a drink of her coke.

            "So, my little Skittles, you miss me already?" Yoli grinned.

            "No, the baka onna made me 'become friends' as a result of my Gravity Room stunt." Vegeta said with disgust, surprisingly not killing Yoli for her question.

            "Bleh, what?" Nadia exclaimed, spluttering on her coke.

            "I said I am to 'become friends' with you. But don't get too excited, that will not happen. I am just pretending." Vegeta said in a hushed whisper, looking over his shoulder. "Whats so funny?" He barked as Nadia laughed.

            "Nothing." She said, still giggling slightly.

            "Woohoo! Seen as we're such good 'friends' we don't have to be your personal slaves, right?" Yoli cheered.

            "Wrong. I won. Fairly, I might add." Vegeta smirked, causing all the girls to swoon. Alex fell off her chair.

            "Don't worry, I did that the first time I saw him in the showe…heehee, nevermind." Yoli suddenly retreated her statement as soon as Vegeta sent her an evil glare.

            "Is this all you weaklings do all day? Talk?" Vegeta asked incredulously.

            "Uh…yeah, we do. Damn, I never noticed that before. How sad." Nadia said aloud.

            "Yes, you are." Vegeta retorted.

            "Stupid vegetable head." Nadia muttered, temporarily forgetting about Saiyans sharp sense of hearing.

            "What was that?" Vegeta demanded.

            "You deaf aswell as dumb?" Nadia asked.

            "Woah, woah, woah! Nadia, Nadia." Yoli coaxed. "You didn't mean anything by that, right? I mean, you wouldn't want to cause extra work for innocent little me tomorrow, right?" Yoli stressed each 'right' through clenched teeth.

            "Screw this, I'm going back to the dorm." Nadia muttered.

            "Wonder whats eating her." Yoli mused aloud, then turned to Vegeta. "So, Skittles, we're all alone." Nadia heard a loud growl before making her way to her dorm.

~*~

            "I am so glad I packed aspirin." Nadia muttered, putting her key in the door. It swung open. 'Strange.' She thought. 'I could've sworn I locked this door earlier.' She went into the room with some apprehension. Nothing seemed to be out of place, so she took out her case and rummaged around for some aspirin. "Aha!" She said, taking the safety cap off with her teeth.

            "Hi there."

            "Eep!" Nadia jumped and hit her head on the ceiling, aspirin pills flying everywhere.

            "Sorry, didn't mean to startle you." A girl with blonde hair and wide, green eyes apologised.

            "Who the fuck are you?" Nadia screamed.

            "You what? That's not a nice way to greet your new roommate!" The girl grinned.

            "Excuse me? I think you must be lost. This is room 14R." Nadia picked up a couple of aspirin pills and made her way to the bathroom for some water.

            "I'm not lost! I've been moved 'cos I kinda, um, accidentally pushed my previous roommate out of the window." The girl scuffed her shoes on the carpet.

            "Oh wow, well now I feel all warm and bubbly knowing you're here." Nadia said sarcastically, swallowing the pills.

            "I'm Saiyjin Girl by the way."

            "Ain't that good for you? And may I add, original." Nadia muttered nastily.

            "Whats your goddamn problem?" Saiyjin Girl shrieked, grating Nadia's nerves.

            "I've got a fucking headache!" Nadia shouted back.

            "Whoopdeeshit!" Saiyjin girl shouted.

            "Oh fuck off before I throw you outta the window!" Nadia yelled.

            "Make me!" Saiyjin Girl retorted. "Whats all this Vegeta shit? Please tell me you don't like Vegeta!" 

            "What the fuck's wrong with Vegeta? Who do you like?" Nadia defended Vegeta.

            "Trunks of course!"

            "Ew! You paedophile!" Nadia gagged.

            "No you dipshit! Mirai Trunks!" Saiyjin Girl said.

            "Oh, the gay one?" Nadia said, an evil smirk crossing her face.

            "Why you-" Saiyjin Girl was about to say something, but decided against it. Instead she grinned, and tore the head off the cardboard cut out.

            "You evil, sadistic bitch!" Nadia screamed, throwing herself at Saiyjin girl.

            "Fat ass!"  
  


            "Whore!" Nadia shouted, not bothering to turn around as she heard the door open.

            "Hey guys. Oh, I see you've already met Sai." Yoli greeted cheerily with Vegeta behind her, ducking as a fork came hurtling towards her, hitting Vegeta smack bang in the forehead.


	13. Bonding

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Awwwwww, poor Nadia's feeling the strain already, and its only the third day! I've added chapter 13 cos you're all being so nice in your reviews *sniff sniff* Anywho, here's Chapter 13, enjoy!

Chapter 13

            "Who the fuck did that?" Vegeta demanded, his anger flaring up, as was the large red fork-mark on his forehead.

            "Nooooooooooo! Skittles!" Yoli cried, running towards her cardboard cut out.

            "It was this…this…thing!" Nadia pointed at Sai who poked her tongue out at Nadia.

            "You monster!" Yoli wept.

            "Well excuse me if you two don't have better taste. I mean Vegeta, really!" Sai scoffed, forgetting Vegeta was standing in the doorway. However, he didn't seem to notice. He was too busy looking at the cut out and how freaky it looked – especially now it had no head.

            "Stupid baka teenagers, I have a message. Honestly, you would think that baka head teacher considers me a simple messenger the way she goes on and on. Worse than the onna!" Vegeta rambled on.

            "What is it, damnit!" Nadia screamed, grabbing more aspirin and getting a glass of water.

            "Hey, haven't you just had three? Won't you die or something?" Sai asked.

            "That's the idea!" Nadia said in mock cheerfulness and downed five more pills.

            "Hmph. Well, I'm all for the idea of less students. There's an emergency assembly now, instead of your lessons." Vegeta encouraged Nadia on taking some more pills.

            "I just want the fucking headache to go, not to die you asshole!" Nadia screamed.

            "Shut up, brat, before I make you!" Vegeta yelled, covering his ears. Everyone went silent, then Vegeta walked off, slamming the door behind him.

            "Jesus Nadia! Whats wrong? Is it, ya know, that time of month?" Yoli asked.

            "No it is fucking not, you cheeky bitch! I am just mad, is it alright if I'm mad? Am I allowed to be mad?" Nadia didn't stop to breathe.

            "I think crazy is more the appropriate word." Sai muttered, getting a cold look from Nadia.

            "I can see there's some tension between you two." Yoli said matter-of-factly. "Just, lets all chill, k?"

            "'K." Sai agreed.

            "Sure, sure. Fine, fine. C'mon, we'll be late for assembly." Nadia said, sounding her usual self. The three girls stood up and made their way to assembly.

~*~

            "Attention please. Can I have your attention please?" Gohan stood at the front, speaking into the mic. The majority of the school staff were sat behind him; Piccolo, Goku, Mirai Trunks, Vegeta (still with his large, red mark), Bulma, Chi Chi, Master Roshi, Krillin, Yamcha, Pu'ar, Frieza and Babidi. "We have called this assembly because various students were asking about home and their parents." Gohan went on as the noise died down.

            "Like I give a crap about my parents." Yoli muttered sourly.

            "I miss mine." Sai said sadly.

            "I miss my bed." Nadia grumbled.

            "All parents have been notified that you're here. Well, not exactly. We didn't tell them it was a DragonBall Z University, we told them it was a Horse Riding Academy." Gohan explained.

            "My mum wouldn't know what DragonBall Z was anyway." Sai whispered.

            "What? Horse Riding! No way! My cred is gonna be so ruined!" Yoli moaned.

            "Why the fuck would I be at a Horse Riding Academy?" Nadia asked, outraged.

            "We understand these past three days have been hard, as you are the youngest students we've had at the University. Plus, the staff have been slacking some." Gohan laughed nervously as he was sent evil glares from Frieza, Vegeta, Bulma, Chi Chi and Babidi.

            "Yeah! Its all the teacher's faults!" Yoli stood up and agreed.

            "So, we have all agreed you will go back to your dimension for the weekend once this week is through." Gohan finished as the students cheered and applauded.

            "But I don't wanna go to my shitty home!" Yoli moaned.

            "Come back with me." Nadia offered.

            "Really? Won't your parents mind?" Yoli asked.

            "Nope, they're on a business trip. Always are. My older brother, Joe, will be there though. He's two years older than me." Nadia grimaced at the mention of her brother.

            "Oooo. Is he cute?" Yoli inquired.

            "No, he is a jerk." Nadia answered.

            "Yeah, that's only to be expected, but is he cute? Mmmm, staying with a hott, sixteen year old. Sounds good to me." Yoli grinned.

            "He is, or so my friends say. I don't really check out my own brother." Nadia laughed.

            "Right, well, I guess that's it. Please be ready for 7 on Friday night. You may return to your dorms after dinner." Gohan said, stepping down from the mic. Buu began setting up tables.

            "I'm going back to the dorm, I'm not hungry." Nadia said to Yoli.

            "Me neither, I'll come with you. What about Sai?" Yoli asked, looking around for their new roommate.

            "She looks a bit busy." Nadia laughed, seeing Sai in the corner having a conversation with Krillin, a rather boring conversation from the look on her face.

~*~

            "Ouch." Nadia muttered, rubbing her feet. She still hadn't found who the shoe stealer was, therefore she had to walk around in no shoes. Very painful.

            "What do you think Krillin wanted with Sai?" Yoli wondered, watching the 'Vegeta Tape' for the thousandth time.

            "Dunno, lets ask her." Nadia stopped rubbing her feet as Sai stormed in, not looking happy.

            "I have to go fucking home with a bald-headed midget as a chaperone! A girl throws someone out of a window, traps someone's hand in a door and temporarily blinds someone and she automatically becomes a threat!" Sai ranted, throwing herself on the third bed that had appeared before lunch.

            "Huh?" Yoli asked, looking up from the TV.

            "Krillin is gonna be my 'watcher'." Sai muttered grumpily.

            "Aw, that's too bad." Nadia said absentmindedly whilst looking at her red feet.

            "Well I'm glad it's not me!" Yoli exclaimed.

            "Thanks for being so sympathetic!" Sai said sourly.

            "Well, you deserve it." Nadia retorted.

            "Why don't you shut your big mouth you stupid…" Sai trailed off as a knock at the door came. She jumped up and answered it. Sai and the person at the door began conversing in hushed whispers, then Sai said her thanks and shut the door.

            "Well?" Nadia asked expectantly.

            "That was Vegeta. He says he'll see you tomorrow morning at 4:30am." Sai said with a smirk.

            "Damnit, I need sleep!" Yoli moaned.

            "Oh, and he said he'll be here at 6:30pm Friday and 'You stupid baka's better be ready because I am not doing this for the good of my health!' In fact, he seemed kinda pissed off." Sai said grinning again.

            "Huh? Friday? Why?" Nadia asked.

            "Looks like I got a good deal in the chaperone thing after all." Sai grinned wider, if that was possible. "I'd rather have a midget follow me home than a midget with incredible powers and a short temper." Sai said above the soft 'thump thumping' of Nadia's head against the pine desk. ****


	14. Beep, Beep

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Ah yes, another hateful Monday. I was thinking about some ideas for this story in Maths, and when my teacher called my name I said "Veget - miss" Thankfully only my friends on the same table heard me, and they've never heard of DragonBall Z so they didn't know what I was on about. I am officially obsessed with this fic, and Jeril Dragonsoul's Another Boring Day…NOT and The Twin Fighters. Ah obsession, my only friend. Oh, and Anime Chick, I never said Trunks sucked, Yoli did. Complete difference there. Anywho, here's Chapter 14, enjoy!

Chapter 14

            "As if he was keeping this secret!" Yoli looked around the Gravity Room once more. "A secret chamber in his Gravity Room, no wonder he spends so much time in it! It's like a mansion!"

            "No, no, no, no, no, no, no." Nadia was banging her head on the refrigerator.

            "And you wonder why you get headaches?"

            "Yoli! He is coming to my house on Friday! What will I say to my brother, to my friends?" Nadia demanded.

            "You have friends?" Yoli joked. "Ok, calm down. It's for two days! Besides, whats wrong with having Vegeta in your room?"

            "Nothing! Everything! Oh, I don't know. Maybe Joe won't even notice my favourite anime character staying in my house." Nadia moaned.

            "He's a sixteen year old male, he's not gonna notice anything except his appetite and whether he's wearing clean underwear. In fact, scrap that last part." Yoli grinned.

            "I guess so." Nadia gave a half-smile.

            "Well then! Now, what did Skittles say he wanted for breakfast?" Yoli asked.

            "He didn't, just food." Nadia said.

            "I can't believe I lost that bet! I should've known he'd trick me! And who heard of breakfast at 4:45am?" Yoli asked incredulously. Nadia had to wake her five times before she actually got up.

            "Yeah well, thanks for including me in it! I knew he was gonna do something." Nadia sniffed, getting some cheese out of the fridge.

            "Why didn't you say something, then?" Yoli demanded, getting out some noodles.

            "What does Vegeta eat anyways?" Nadia asked, looking in the cupboards.

            "Uh…he's Japanese, so, um, Japanese food." 

            "Wow, clever girl." Nadia muttered sarcastically. "Only thing I've seen him eat is rice. Rice and noodles."

            "Oh! And chicken!" Yoli called.

            "Right! Grab a bunch of stuff and put it on here!" Nadia said, off-loading her truckload of food she'd gotten from the cupboards.

            "Right, lets see what we've got." Yoli peered at the stuff. "Cheese, whipped cream, chicken, chicken noodles, chicken oxo cubes, roast chicken flavoured crisps, bananas, Kit Kats, sweet and sour rice, M & M's, strawberries, cucumber, tomatoes, a teabag, two cooking apples and gravy."

            "Hmmm…do you think he'll eat all that for breakfast?" Nadia asked.

            "He's a Saiyan, of course he will! I'll be surprised if he even tastes it, the way he swallows it! The thing is; what can we make with all this stuff?" Yoli pondered.

            "Uh…soup!" A bright green light bulb flashed above Nadia's head.

            "Yeah! Grab a big pot and bring it over here." Yoli said, pointing to a cupboard where she'd spotted some pans earlier.

            "Here…ya…go." Nadia said between breaths, dumping the enormous pot next to the ingredients. Yoli came over with a jug and poured in some water.

            "K, I'll just put everything in at once I guess." Yoli said, scooping everything up and dumping it in the pot, not bothering about packaging, then she poured the cold gravy on top. "There." She finished triumphantly.

            "Uh…Yoli…" Nadia started. "How we gonna get it over to the cooker? Its bloody heavy!" Nadia attempted to pick up the pot.

            "Umm…hang on!" Yoli disappeared from the kitchen, and returned with a red toy wagon in tow. "I found this lying around." Yoli explained.

            "Whats Vegeta doing with that?" Nadia asked, raising an eyebrow.

            "Fuck knows. He's still hott though." Yoli said, her motto for whenever Vegeta did something strange.

            "Amen to that." Nadia said, whilst quickly putting the pot onto the wagon before she dropped it. Yoli pulled the wagon towards the cooker and pretty soon they'd got everything boiling nicely.

            "Uh…Yoli." Nadia called. "You forgot to peel the bananas!"  
  


            "Don't worry, they'll melt down." Yoli said absentmindedly, thumbing through a magazine entitled 'Revenge'.

            "Whats with the magazine?" Nadia inquired, stirring the concoction.

            "We've got The Fusion Dance tomorrow, and purple boy is gonna wish he'd never been born!" Yoli said, looking closely at an article.

            "I'm glad I'm not in his shoes then!"

            "Oh yeah, um, did Chi Chi say to not lose our frying pans otherwise we'd sit through five hours of them on a video?" Yoli asked.

            "Uh huh." 

            "Whoops." Yoli muttered.

            "What? You lost yours? You are so dead!" Nadia exclaimed.

            "I know! What am I going to do? Five hours!" Yoli groaned.

            "Ooo! You can get one from my house! We don't have her until Monday! Which reminds me, I need to grab some new shoes. My feet are killing me!" Nadia said sorrowfully. She loved her feet.

            "Brats! I'm hungry!" Vegeta bellowed.

            "Yeah, yeah. It's coming!" Yoli shouted back, grabbing some oven gloves and putting the pot onto the wagon. She then wheeled it into 'Vegeta's Dining Room', which was pretty spiffy, with Nadia in tow.

            "There. Happy?" Nadia asked.

            "No, but I suppose it will have to do." Vegeta smirked. Yoli served all fifty bowls until there was no soup left. "What's this?" Vegeta asked, wrinkling his nose.

            "Soup!"

            "For breakfast?" He asked, sceptically.

            "Of course!" Yoli said. "Well, eat it then!"

            "Better not be poisonous." Vegeta mumbled, then began to taste the soup, slowly. His stomach growled loudly, causing him to eat at a much quicker rate, occasionally stopping to chew part of a banana peel. Within seven minutes he'd licked each bowl clean.

            "Holy shit!" Nadia exclaimed.

            "That was…oh." Vegeta stopped talking and clutched his stomach. "I think I'm going to be…" Vegeta ran out of the Gravity Room as quick as a flash.

            "Whats up with him?" Nadia asked, bewildered.

            "I'll be damned if I know." Yoli said. "But, no more slaving about." 

            "Woohoo!" Nadia cheered. "And we have five minutes until next lesson." Nadia muttered. "Yay, I got class with Frieza." She said sarcastically.

            "I have Hercule! I have to listen him ranting on and on about how much he's stronger than everyone else." Yoli moaned, stepping out of the Gravity Room and entering the University. They ascended the staircase and went right.

            "Awww." Nadia said sympathetically. "Well, I'll seeya later." Nadia waved to her friend as she entered her room, Yoli still going down the corridor.

            "Please take your seats." Frieza sat behind a desk, dressed in a tie and suit. This fact did not freak Nadia out; the fact that it didn't freak her out freaked her out.

            "Damn, I've been here too long." Nadia muttered, taking a seat at the back.

            "Now, today we will play a game to make learning each others names fun!" Frieza said, a smile to rival Barney's.

            "What the fuck?" One boy said aloud.

            "Tut tut. Now young man, they'll be no more of that language in my classroom or you get no milk break! Whats your name?" Frieza scolded gently.

            "Uh…James…"

            "Ok. No more outbursts like that again, please." Frieza asked politely.

            "Uh…" James looked dumbfounded, or scared, or both.

            "You may enter." Frieza called as a knock came at the door.

            "Listen up you slimy lizard, I'm looking for Nadia…uh…whats her last name, brat?" Vegeta's voice demanded, shaking a petrified Yoli.

            "Goodyear." Yoli had to fight the urge to say 'Skittles'. It wasn't fun being hung upside down on the fountain.

            "Uh…here." Nadia managed to choke out.

            "Come on, brat." Vegeta stomped away from the door as Nadia followed him.

            "What the fuck did you baka's feed me?" Vegeta asked, enraged.

            "Breakfast!" Yoli stated, and then shrank back remembering the fountain.

            "Why, are you ill?" Nadia asked.

            "No! I am the Prince of all…"Vegeta paused as his stomach gave off an unhealthy noise. "Saiya-jins. I do not get 'ill' like you puny earthlings do!" 

            "Well excuse me, Skittles!" Yoli scoffed, covering her mouth as she said it. 

            "What was that?" Vegeta snarled.

            "C'mon Vegeta, what happened to friends, buddies, pals?" Nadia asked.

            "Yeah, besides, we've seen you naked." Yoli burst out with, and then covered her mouth again.

            "Right, that's it." Vegeta roared, grabbing the two girls and flying towards the fountain outside.

            "No, no! Not the fountain!" Yoli shrieked in horror as Vegeta grabbed some rope and tied both girls' feet to each arm of the statue situated in the middle of the fountain, the perfect angle for the water to hit them in the face alternatively every minute.

            "Now maybe you will learn to respect the Prince of all Saiya-jins." Vegeta smirked, and then flew off.

            "Its…gonna…be…a…whole…lotta…fun…on…Saturday…eh?" Yoli said between mouthfuls of water.

A/N2: Awww, poor Skittles, I mean Vegeta, is sick! Oh, and cos I'm such a loner; if you have MSN I'd love to talk to some DBZ fans! My addy is: Banana_Girl39@hotmail.com

             ****


	15. Monkeys Obey Me, Baboons Fear Me

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Duh! Sorry Miss Cam, sending you the URL completely slipped my mind. I am not worthy *bows*, I am not worthy *bows* Anywho, here's Chapter 15, enjoy!

Chapter 15

            "Ouch! You could've been a bit gentler with me!" Yoli complained, rubbing her ass.

            "Yoli, at least be grateful! She didn't have to help us!" Nadia said, referring to the girl who'd spotted them and cut the ropes holding their feet to the statue.

            "Oh, it was no problem." The girl smiled.

            "Well, thanks anyway. I'm Nadia, that rude person is Yoli." 

            "I'm Jeril. Jer for short." Jer shook Nadia's outstretched hand.

            "Fucking hell!" Yoli shouted, pointing at the girl's waist.

            "You're a Saiyan?" Nadia asked in disbelief.

            "Oh yeah, that." Jer looked down at her brown, furry tail wrapped securely around her waist.

            "What do you mean 'that'? It's bloody great! You lucky sod!" Yoli said enviously.

            "It's not that great. I have to sit down in a certain way otherwise it fucking kills!" Jer smiled.

            "How the hell did you manage to become a Saiyan?" Nadia asked, still looking at Jer's tail in awe.

            "Oh, well, ya know the enrolment papers? I kinda ticked 'Saiyan' and well, here I am."

            "Aren't you sleeping in the basement?" Nadia asked.

            "Oh, well I was. Believe me, that was bad enough. But Cell started having his therapy lessons down there and I had to be moved. I now sleep in the kitchen, underneath the bright blue cupboards. It's horrible – I now know what Buu puts in the secret sauce." Jer pulled a face. "That's why I have salad every day, at least I know there's no secret to that."

            "Oh." Yoli looked down and patted her stomach. The secret sauce was her favourite.

            "Thank kami I only eat tuna sandwiches. They're OK, aren't they?" Nadia asked, a look of panic crossing her features.

            "Oh yeah, they order the sandwiches from some company. It's the cooked stuff you gotta be wary of." Jer shared her knowledge on the ingredients.

            "Oh." Yoli looked down and patted her stomach again. She only ate cooked meals.

            "You OK, Yoli? You look a bit green." Nadia asked her friend.

            "Yeah, yeah. Fine." Yoli said shakily.

            "That's a shame, because Vegeta isn't! We're so dead in periods five and six!" Nadia wailed.

            "Well excuse me! Anyway, they say the way to a Saiyan's heart is through his stomach! I've seen whats in his pants, now I want his heart!" Yoli said, mocking a spoilt brat.

            "You're really weird, ya know? Most girls would be content with seeing Vegeta just naked. But no, you've seen him naked several times over, on video and photographed, in reverse and slow motion, are you grateful? Nope!" Nadia laughed.

            "You've seen Vegeta naked?" Jer asked, wide-eyed.

            "Yup, full frontal. I'll lend you the tape if you like." Yoli grinned.

            "Oh no you won't! We don't want Vegeta finding out about this!" Nadia said, as Jer was nodding her head rapidly in answer to Yoli's question.

            "Don't worry, I'll still let you borrow it. Just don't tell her." Yoli whispered, causing Nadia not to hear, but Jer's sharp Saiyan sense picked it up and she grinned.

            "Which also reminds me, that purple floppy-fringed baka is gonna feel my wrath!" Yoli said louder, rubbing her ankles where the rope had cut in.

            Nadia looked at her soaking wet tank top and jeans that weighed double the amount they had when she'd put them on. Yoli was no better, with her hair dripping wet and only one shoe. She fished her missing shoe out of the bottom of the fountain and put it on, noticing the students heading towards them led by Trunks and Goten for their first class.

            "You're wet." Trunks stated matter-of-factly when he reached the girls.

            "No shit, Sherlock." Nadia said, wringing her hair.

            "Trunks! She's not allowed to talk to us like that, is she?" Goten asked, his mouth wide open at Nadia's foul language.

            "No, you're not. We can give you detention, ya know." Trunks smirked.

            "Why you little asshole!" Yoli yelled, kicking Trunks sharply in the shin before he had chance to react. "Where the hell is my Game Boy?" She demanded, a dark look crossing her usual sunny disposition.

            "I…I…its mine! We swapped, fair and square!" Trunks stammered.

            "Not fair! You grassed!" Yoli accused.

            "I did not! My dad just caught me! Besides, I never mentioned the tape! He just noticed the Polaroid's, that's all!" Trunks defended himself, as Nadia and Goten looked on.

            "Yeah, well…just don't do it again, brat!" Yoli warned.

            "OK, OK. Sorry." Trunks muttered as Yoli and Nadia took a seat on the grass – they'd had enough of the fountain for one day.

            "OK everyone! Line up in front of the fountain and we'll find you a partner of roughly the same build and height." Goten called above the noise. He and Trunks walked up and down the line, choosing people to partner each other. Jer had gone to join a girl who, by the look of things, had ticked 'Namek' on the enrolment papers.

            "Wow, what a coincidence! We're together!" Yoli gave Nadia her best smile, however it didn't faze Nadia.

            "Oh yes, such a big 'coincidence'. No, honestly, what did you do?" Nadia looked at Yoli sceptically.

            "Oh, nothing. Just told him what would happen if his daddy caught wind that he supplied me with a certain tape." Yoli said with a self-satisfied smirk.

            "You're evil!" Nadia laughed.

            "OK Goten, you read their ki's. Yes, I know it's hard to pick them up but try! It's not their faults they're so weak!" Trunks called to his best friend.

            "You cheeky shit! Just 'cos we're not Saiyans like you hybrids!" Yoli spat.

            "Yeah!" Nadia agreed, a bit put off by being called 'weak'.

            "Right, well your ki is rather high, actually. For a human anyways." Trunks said to Yoli, who grinned foolishly. "And yours is…woah! I can hardly read it! You need to do some serious training!"

            "You what?" Nadia demanded, studying Trunks' face. Nope, he was serious enough.

            "You need to train! Start by press-ups, sit-ups, whatever. Anything will help! You definitely should think about going in the Gravity Room in free periods, your ki is practically miniscule. It must be the smallest in the whole of the students I've taught!" Trunks called back, walking over to another pair of students to read their ki's.

            "Not a word!" Nadia hissed as Yoli stood there, watching her attempt at press-ups, a huge grin plastered on her face.

A/N2: Cos I'm such a loner; if you have MSN I'd love to talk to some DBZ fans! My addy is: Banana_Girl39@hotmail.com

             ****


	16. Evil Skittles!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Fucking hell, 89 reviews!!! Not that I'm complaining ^_^ Wow, that is like…lots! Quorky: *Claps* as always, beautifully worded, BananaGirl.

Chapter 15

            "Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow." Nadia groaned with each step she took. Trunks and Goten were really pushing her. Her whole body was bruised and battered, not to mention her ego.

            "Nadia, we are heading to the Gravity Room which is, what (?), two, three metres away?" Yoli said unsympathetically.

            "Its alright for you, you're not lacking in ki!" Nadia retorted.

            "Well, that's true." Yoli grinned. She'd been thinking she was invincible and the next Spiderman (or should that be woman?) all morning.

            "Right, brats. Spread around. Lets see if you can withstand any amount of gravity. I got the onna to take it up to six decimal places so I better see some results! No one is leaving for lunch until I see at least ten press-ups within the practically miniscule amount of 0.00007 times Earth's gravity. Is that clear?" Vegeta barked, standing at the front on the chamber. Murmurs of yes' and yeahs could be heard. "That's yes, Prince Vegeta, you baka's!" 

            "Yes, Prince Vegeta!" The students called back, including Yoli (surprisingly!)

            "That's better." Vegeta smirked as he switched on the gravity. The majority of the students hit the floor with a loud 'umph'. The ones left standing were Jer, Let - the Namek Yoli saw Jer with earlier and Phoenix, the oldest and maturest student at the University being 17 years of age.

            "I want you to sort these worthless teenagers into three groups, then alternate yourselves between each of them, understood?" Vegeta barked his orders.

            "Yes, Prince Vegeta, sir!" The three students said with a slight grimace.

            "Now you pathetic, puny, unintelligent, sorry excuses for human beings will attempt to stand within this gravity, for you will not be leaving this room unless you can walk out of it, and I will not, I repeat not, be switching down the gravity any time soon! Kami help you if your still here at the end of the day when I train in four hundred times Earth's gravity!" Vegeta yelled each word with precision.

            "Well…I…guess…he…didn't…like…breakfast…then." Nadia gasped to Yoli.

            "I…think I need…that 'Revenge' mag…azine." Yoli puffed, not nearly as bad as Nadia.

"OK, I wanna see you guys try and stand up!" The girl/Namek named Let walked over and said encouragingly.

            "Oh…yeah. No…problem…there." Nadia said sarcastically, resting her head on the chamber floor.

            "C'mon, you guys can do it! You don't wanna let Vegeta win, do you?" Let asked, smiling at the students. A dozen or so other students had joined with Yoli and Nadia to create 'Group 2'. 

            "Gnnnnnnn." A boy strained as he managed to stand up, slowly and painfully, but he stood nonetheless.

            "Great! C'mon, I wanna see some more people!" Let shouted in triumph.

            "Doesn't…want much does…she?" Nadia muttered to the group, speaking becoming easier for her.

            "Blooooooooooody…hell!" Three girls stood up, cursing painfully, holding onto each other's shoulder to help.

            "This is great!" Let shouted enthusiastically as pretty soon the whole group was standing, save Nadia and a small boy with glasses and black hair styled in curtains.

            "Uhhhhhhhhhhhh." The boy made a high-pitched sound as he stood shakily.

            "C'mon Nadia!" Yoli encouraged her friend.

            "I'd like to, but I'm stuck!" Nadia shouted in rage. "Oh fuck." She breathed as two gold-tipped boots appeared in front of her. 'Ooo, déjà vu! I had a dream about this once.' Nadia thought to herself, blushing in remembrance of what the dream had actually been about.

            "Come on! You're holding everyone up! Oh, its you." Vegeta groaned. "You!" He said, pointing at Let. "Don't go easy on her." He said, and Nadia could just imagine the evil smirk he was pulling right now. 'Of course, this isn't how the dream ended.' She smiled to herself, positioning her hands beneath her and attempting to push herself up.

            "Shit! Ow! Oh fuck! Fucking hell! Ow, ow, ow, ow, OW!" Nadia yelled as her arms bent backwards and she landed hard on her stomach, her forehead hitting the floor with a loud bang. "Stupid, fucking, asshole of a room!" Nadia yelled more in rage than pain.

            "You OK?" Yoli and Let came over, concerned.

            "Yeah, fine." Nadia muttered. "Everyone else can stand?" She asked incredulously as she looked around the room seeing everyone else's feet.

            "Uh, yeah. C'mon Nadia. Its not that bad." Yoli comforted her friend.

            "I…can do…this." Nadia muttered to herself, positioning her hands again, hoping they wouldn't bend back and nothing was broken. "Uhhhhhh…" Nadia breathed heavily, and started pushing herself up. Straining her back and legs, she managed to get into a crouching position, then pushed her head upwards helping her to stand.

            "Woo! Go Nadia!" Yoli congratulated her friend.

            "Yay! I did it!" Nadia breathed a sigh of relief and smiled as Let patted her on the back.

            "Oh wow. You can stand in 0.00007 times Earth's gravity. Very impressive." Vegeta said sarcastically, stood with his arms crossed. "Whilst you have been attempting to stand, your students have mastered how to walk. Why don't you have a go?" Vegeta smirked.

            "Kami, Skittles is so hott when he's sadistic!" Yoli breathed, getting a cold stare from Vegeta.

            "Huh…what the?" Nadia demanded, after having tried several times to move but found she could not.

            "You!" Vegeta pointed at Phoenix. "Teach this baka how to walk." Vegeta walked off to 'Group 1' and began criticising someone from there. Phoenix walked over, muttering something about respect.

            "Hi. What seems to be the problem?" Phoenix asked Nadia politely.

            "She can't walk." Yoli chimed in.

            "Thanks, Nadia." Nadia said to Yoli sarcastically. "Yeah, I can't walk. I'm kinda…slow." Nadia muttered.

            "No problem, it took me ages to learn how to walk in this thing. Its not like we're built for it, just take it slow, ok?" Phoenix smiled.

            "Ok." Nadia nodded, concentrating on the task at hand.

            "Just put all the strain into your legs and lower back." Phoenix took a similar position to Nadia. "Like this." She said, walking towards Yoli and back.

            "Ha, yeah right." Nadia laughed. "Like I can do that. What gravity can you walk in?" Nadia asked.

            "Twice, and I can stand in three times. Hey, it took me a year and a half to learn!" Phoenix said as Nadia's eyes widened.

            "How long have you been here? Why didn't you go home?" Yoli asked, her usual nosey self.

            "Aren't you supposed to be learning how to train with Jer?" Nadia asked.

            "Yeah, but this is more interesting. Besides, she's got a tail and I don't, it's not fair!" Yoli pouted.

            "But she also knows whats in the secret sauce." Nadia pointed out.

            "Point well taken." Yoli nodded her head. "Now, why have you been here so long?" Yoli asked.

            "Well, I just love it here, and the University hired me to teach scared newcomers the ropes and what-have-you." Phoenix explained. 

            "That's all very interesting, but there is fifteen minutes left until lunch and I can't WALK!" Nadia said, pointing out the obvious as Yoli re-joined her group and began mimicking Jer's movements.

            "Right, well put all your energy into your leg and push, like you're having a baby." Phoenix instructed.

            "Oh yeah, done that lots of times." Nadia muttered, following what Phoenix had just said.

  A/N2: Ah yes, everyone is anticipating Yoli's, Nadia's and Vegeta's weekend trip I see? Me too! Its gonna be great to write! But, good things come to those who wait, so I estimate another two chapters until George III picks them up! Oh, and cos I'm such a loner; if you have MSN I'd love to talk to some DBZ fans! My addy is: Banana_Girl39@hotmail.com

             ****


	17. Special Sauce And Mental Drooling

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: 100 bloody reviews! Thank you! Thank you! Oh, the last chapter said 'Chapter 15' as the header when, of course, it should've been Chapter 16. Sorry 'bout that. Oh, and Jeril Dragonsoul, I'd LOVE to be in one of your fics! Another Boring Day…NOT or The Twin Fighters would be good, where ever you can fit me ^_^ Wow, how cool! On with the fic!

Chapter 17

            "About time." Vegeta smirked as Nadia finished her tenth press-up. It'd been thirty minutes since the bell for lunch had rang.

            "Come on then Nadia!" Yoli urged her friend; she had been waiting for her, yet her stomach seemed to have other ideas.

            "Uh…I can't move." Nadia groaned, every muscle in her body aching.

            "Pathetic human. In fact, you're weaker than most humans here! How sad." Vegeta scoffed, standing with his arms crossed.

            "C'mon Nadia." Yoli glanced at Vegeta, mentally drooling. She took Nadia's arm and helped her up.

            "I can do it myself, thanks." Nadia stood up, already embarrassed.

            "Hurry up then, baka. I haven't got all day." Vegeta stood idly, his hand wavering over the gravity knob.

            "Yeah, yeah, Skittles." Yoli muttered, getting a harsh scowl from Vegeta as she mentally drooled again.

            "Ow, ow, ow!" Nadia groaned once they were outside, above Yoli's stomach.

            "Mmmm. I can just smell the special sauce." Yoli licked her lips.

            "Ew! You're gonna eat it after Jer's warning?" Nadia pulled a face.

            "Hey, I don't know whats in it! Besides, it tastes good whatever it is! I dunno how I survived without it these past fourteen years." Yoli rambled.

~*~

            "I see you're finally out. Did Vegeta take pity on you?" Alex asked, taking a bite of her ham sandwich.

            "Ha! No! He just stood there, mocking me. It's a good thing he's hott otherwise there'd be no hope for him." Nadia shook her head.

            "Yeah, but damn, did my Skittles pull some poses! I nearly died of dehydration in there!" Yoli took a gulp of water to prove her point.

            "It was just like my gigantic poster on the roof above my bed back home." Nadia stated, mentally drooling.

            "Ah well, I guess being an underachiever does have its advantages." Alex said absentmindedly. Nadia froze.

            "Underachiever?" Nadia wailed. "It's true! I'm an underachiever, below average, a 'special' student."

            "Nadia, chill!" Yoli said, tucking into her chips drowning in special sauce.

            "Chill? How can I chill? I am the weakest student in the history of the University! I am lower than low! I am a…underachiever!" Nadia stated, a clap of thunder accompanying her last word.

            "Cool, like in the movies." Yoli said appreciatively about the thunder.

            "Its not that bad, you're good at other stuff!" Alex reassured her friend.

            "Yeah! Like getting us out of sticky situations! You survived the wrath of Piccolo, Cell, Skittles and driven Mirai Trunks close to the brink of insanity! That's an impressive list!" Yoli said, with a mouthful of special sauce.

            "Yeah!" Nadia shouted. "Plus, I just need to keep training!"

            "That's the spirit!" Alex said, leaving her seat as the bell signalled seventh period.

~*~ (Time Lapse: Friday, five minutes before periods 8 and 9. Wow, time sure did fly, huh?)

            "What the hell was our homework for the Friendship class? With Yamcha and the blue thingy?" Yoli asked Sai, watching the Vegeta tape without sound this time.

            "Uh…just research the different types of friendship in DragonBall Z I think." Sai muttered, sat at the desk scribbling down an essay that was due in five minutes.

            "Hey Yoli, are you OK, about the whole frying pan incident? I heard that boy pissed himself and his hands couldn't stop shaking for hours!" Nadia declared, referring to the lesson they'd had with Chi Chi. A small boy had innocently asked Chi Chi for a new frying pan, claiming he'd lost his previous one. Chi Chi went ballistic, throwing flour and rice everywhere, and there were lots to throw considering they were cooking for Saiyans. Then, she made him sit through five hours of 'Frying Pans – The Musical' on DVD and given him the cassette to listen to for thirty minute instalments each night.

            "Oh yeah, I'll just grab one from your house." Yoli said, edging closer to the TV screen.

            "C'mon, we better be going. We've got the Hentai next." Nadia laughed, grabbing her backpack.

            "OK." Yoli said, fiddling with the video recorder. "Be right out." She called as Nadia left the room.

            "Hey Nadia!" A girl emerged from Number 10 and greeted Nadia in the corridor.

            "Hey Sarra! You got the Hentai next?" Nadia asked.

            "Ew, yeah! Its gonna be gross, that's for sure. He's such a pervert! 'Girl's Only', honestly!" Sarra ridiculed.

            "Hey guys." Yoli greeted, locking the dorm door behind her. "Lets go then!" She said, making her way towards Room 3. Pushing open the door, they saw Master Roshi stood at the front of the class, eyeing each student carefully. Two stacks of Bikini magazines 2002 sat on his desk.

            "Hello young ladies." Roshi looked at each girl appreciatively.

            "Uh huh." Nadia muttered, glancing around the room. The only spare seats were at the front, as the back was full to the brim, some desks having three students as opposed to the usual two.

            "Thank god I'm not wearing a skirt." Yoli muttered to Nadia as they took a seat in the corner. Sarra sat behind them but one next to a girl they didn't recognise.

            "Now girl's, why don't we introduce ourselves, and what our interests are? I'm Muten Roshi, but you may call me 'daddy' if you like." Roshi grinned, showing a row of crooked teeth as the girls began to gag. "Lets start with you." Roshi pointed at Nadia and winked at her.

            "I'm Nadia, I'm 14 and I'm not interested." Nadia sat down, cringing as Roshi eyed her once more.

            "Uh, I'm Yoli. I'm also 14. I like…uh…doing stuff. Kid stuff." She hastily added as she caught a gleam in Roshi's eye. She sat down abruptly.

            "I'm Sarra." Sarra stood up.

            "What type of men do you go for, Sarra?" Roshi inquired, grinning.

            "Uh, under forty, cute, intelligent and funny. Sorry." Sarra smiled apologetically and sat down. This went on for the remainder of the lesson, each girl insulting Roshi and, more or less, calling him a 'dirty old pervert that needs a good cleaning, you stupid wanka!' (In the words of Alex.)

            "Well girls, it is now nearly the end of class. Yes, I know, its unfortunate for me too. Here is your homework. As you've all been well behaved all you have to do is take this box and put it in your bathroom. That's it! It's an experiment and we will study the reactions at a later date. Please specify whether you share a dorm with someone in this class, and I will give you only one." Master Roshi went round each student, handing a tiny, black box.

            "What the hell is this?" Nadia asked, turning the black cube over in her hands.

            "Who gives a shit? Easy homework!" Yoli declared, yawning.

            "Class dismissed." Roshi said after handing out the boxes. He sat down at his desk and began leafing through his magazines.

            "Grrr. What an awful day!" Nadia moaned as they were heading up the dorm staircase.

            "I know! Ah well, we get a weekend break!" Yoli cheered.

            "Hardly, what about Vegeta?" Nadia asked.

            "Can't he keep your brother company? I mean, he probably won't notice Vegeta anyway." 

            "Oh no? I mean, he doesn't watch DragonBall Z, only occasionally when I am. But he's seen my room, my figurines and he's seen the websites I go on!" Nadia complained.

            "Tut, tut. Getting some Veggie-candy from the net?" Yoli grinned.

            "Not anymore, I have it on VHS!" Nadia grinned, opening their dorm room door. They'd had an early dinner in preparation for the visits home.

            "Hey guys!" Sai called from her bed, packing her things.

            "Hey." Yoli called, getting her toothbrush from the bathroom and placing the box Master Roshi had given them on top of the cabinet.

            "Hi Sai." Nadia said, flopping onto her bed. She'd packed her things earlier this morning. "I'll get it." Nadia said as a soft knock came at the door. "George? Have you lost weight?" Nadia asked the cloud at the door.

            "No, I'm Bob VI, Sai's ride." Bob said, in a slightly higher voice than George's.

            "Hey Bob! Well, I'll see ya later guys!" Sai called, hopping on her cloud with her travel bag. "When will we pick up Baldy?"

            "Now." Bob said as they sped off down the corridor.

            "Bye!" Nadia waved, shutting the dorm door. Almost immediately another knock came, this one more harder and arrogant.  'Oh that's George alright.' Nadia thought.

            "Hey. C'mon, I ain't got all day, especially with the miniscule salary they pay me here!" George III complained, his usual 'cheery' self. Sat upon him was Vegeta, his arms folded and a 'say-anything-and-I-will-kill-you-or-almost-certainly-cripple-you-for-life' look.

            "Yoli!" Nadia called as Yoli grabbed her case and joined Nadia on the cloud.

            "Hey Skittles, why aren't you flying?" Yoli waved at Vegeta.

            "Because, baka, it is impossible to fly into a different dimension unless you are one of these things." He pointed to the cloud. "And don't call me Skittles!"

            "Hey, what do you mean, 'these things'?" George demanded, a bit put-off.

            "Why not…Skittles?" Yoli asked innocently, in reference to Vegeta's earlier comment.

            'Oh boy, it's gonna be a long flight.' Nadia thought to herself, as three voices began shouting at each other at once. 

  A/N2: Quorky: What the hell is 'mentally drooling' when it's at home?

            Ya know! When physically you look normal, 'cept glazed eyes, and your head is just screaming 'Mhmmmmm, so, so, so fine!'            

            Quorky: Uh…no, not really .****


	18. Home, George

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey, Dark-Angel, than you soooo much for putting me in your fic! Wow, what an honour!! I'm not going to be home this weekend, so this is probably the last chapter until Monday, unless I manage to write one Sunday night. Ok then, on with the fic!

Chapter 18

            "Well excuse me, but I was bored!" Yoli yelled at George.

            "Bored? You were bored, so you started to pick pieces off of me?" George asked incredulously. "That's it, I'm gone. I'll be here Sunday night to pick you up. That is, if my back grows back!" George flew away and Nadia, Yoli and Vegeta watched him until he was just a speck in the sky. 

            "Hmph. What a pathetic excuse for a dimension." Vegeta stated, looking around.

            "Ain't that the truth? Here, my house is thatta way." Nadia pointed to a three-bedroom, red-bricked house four doors down.

            "He could've at least dropped us as the door!" Yoli muttered, as they went through the gate.

            "What a miniscule house." Vegeta noted.

            "Well excuse me, but not all of us can have fifty-odd bedrooms when there's only four people." Nadia shot back. "Spoilt brat." She muttered.

            "You're just jealous." Vegeta smirked.

            "Uh…I don't have a key." Nadia groaned, trying to push open the door. It was locked.

            "Go get your brother then!" Yoli urged as it began to rain.

            "This is ridiculous! The Prince of all Saiya-jins does not wait in the rain whilst some bumbling teenage male unlocks the door for him. It is not right." Vegeta said, preparing a small ki blast and shot it at the lock.

            "Clever idea, lets break the lock so we don't have to use keys again and murderer's have the perfect way to get in." Nadia said, clapping sarcastically.

            "Why do you need locks when the Prince of all Saiya-jins is here?" Vegeta demanded, stepping into the house.

            "Oh Skittles, would you save me?" Yoli looked up at Vegeta, her eyes going dreamy all of a sudden.

            "Woah!" Nadia turned a picture face down that was on a table stand.

            "Aw, was that a baby pic, Nadia? Lemme see!" Yoli made a grab for the picture but didn't succeed.

            "No, no. Its nothing." Nadia said. "Hold up, why the hell are you still cartoony, Vegeta? Eeep! We're not, are we?" Nadia asked, as she and Yoli hurried over to the mirror hanging near the coat pegs.

            "Phew. Wow, its weird seeing me like this, now." Yoli commented.

            "Fuck!" A voice came from the living room.

            "Eeep! My brother! How are we gonna explain Vegeta?" Nadia asked, entering the living room cautiously.

            "Hey Shrimp. I see you're back from riding horsies, have lots of fun?" Joe smirked, not looking up from the TV, where he was sat in his underwear and smelt like he hadn't had a shower for days. His feet were propped on the coffee table, his left foot kitted in a red sock and his right in a black.

            "Nice." Yoli whispered to Nadia, who pulled a face.

            "Shut up, you slob. Is it so hard to have a bath and crack open a window once mum or me aren't here?" Nadia grumbled, trying to hold her nose and open the living room window at the same time.

            "You're a right bitch, ya know that?" Joe growled at his sister, not taking his eyes of the TV set.

            "Takes one to know one. And can you turn it down? Just 'cos it's surround sound doesn't mean you have to let the whole street hear you!" Nadia moaned. "Besides, my friend came back with me. Yoli."

            "Hi." Yoli greeted.

            "Hey." Joe muttered, taking his gaze off the screen for a second then returning into his previous pose. "Who the hell is that?" Joe spun around again, blinking rapidly.

            "Oh, him. I can…"

            "I am the Prince of all Saiya-jins, you pathetic excuse for an earthling. Whats it to you?" Vegeta jumped in.

            "Thanks Vegeta." Nadia groaned, banging her head on the window.

            "Hey, isn't he…yeah, he is! He's the guy plastered all over your walls, and you have all that merchandise of him. And those disgusting websites you went on had a weird name like Vegeta." Joe said.

            "Oh crap!" Nadia said, rushing upstairs. "Don't move, I'll just be a minute!" She called down, running into her bedroom.

~*~

            "Stupid, dumbass brothers." Nadia grumbled, pulling the last of her posters off the wall, succeeding to leave blobs of blu-tack behind and ripping off small pieces of green wallpaper.

            "Nadia?" Yoli's voice came, as she came up the stairs.

            "Fuck!" Nadia muttered, shoving the posters under her bed along with the figurines, alarm clock and stationary.

            "Hmph. You'd think she'd treat us with respect, we are guests in her home after all. Honestly, the youth of today have no dignity." Vegeta's voice began to get louder as he and Yoli neared the bedroom. Doing a somersault off the bed, Nadia rolled over to her desk to switch off her computer with the Vegeta desktop.

            "Holy shit!" Nadia screamed, as Yoli and Vegeta came rushing in.

            "What is it?" Yoli asked, her eyes darting around the room for any sign of danger.

            "He is so fucking dead! Oi, asshole, get you're lazy, thieving backside up here, now!" Nadia bellowed.

            "What the hell are you shouting at?" Joe asked, looking around at the newly changed room.

            "What the fuck have you done with my computer?" Nadia demanded.

            "Oh…that. Well, I sorta, um, lent it Ryan…"

            "What? That spotty freak, with the greasy hair? Why you…" Nadia threw herself at her brother.

            "Woah…" Joe dodged out of the way as Nadia crashed into a wall.

            "Grrr. Stop it, you baka's!" Vegeta interrupted the fight.

            "But…my computer…" Nadia looked on the verge of tears.

            "God, Shrimp. I'll get it back, chill." Joe muttered, rubbing his arm where she'd bit him.

            "Damn straight you will!" Nadia shot back.

            "Hey, whats happened to all your posters of him?" Joe asked, pointing at Vegeta.

            "Posters? What posters? Hahaha! You crack me up, Joe!" Nadia said as Vegeta's eyes narrowed. She rubbed her brother's head playfully.

            "What the…" Joe moved his head out of her reach, and looked at her as if she was insane.

            "Posters? What posters?" Vegeta demanded.

            "Uh, nothing. C'mon now, Joe. Go take a shower and get dressed. Bye bye." Nadia ignored Joe's protests as she pushed him out of her room. Once he was out she breathed a sigh of relief and sat on her bed next to Yoli.

            "What the…" Vegeta said sitting down, as he fished something from underneath him.

            "Eeep!" Nadia grabbed the figurine of Vegeta SSJ2 and threw it under her bed.

            "What was that?" Vegeta demanded, narrowing his eyes.

            "Heehee, uh nothing." Nadia stuttered.

            "Onna, I'm hungry." The Saiyan Prince stated simply.

            "Uh…ok. We'll go to McDonalds. You'll love it Veggie-Chan." Nadia said, covering her mouth at her last comment.

            "Ok, good. Let's go." Vegeta said, seemingly not noticing her slip-up.

            "Yay! McDonalds! Yummy!" Yoli rubbed her stomach appreciatively.

            "Well, lead the way…Shrimp." Vegeta smirked maliciously as Nadia shot him a dirty look.


	19. Cheese Burger, Hold The Cheese

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: I'm baaaaaaaaaack! I saw a boy in McDonald's yesterday wearing a DragonBall Z t-shirt, with a picture of Goku on the front. Just thought you'd like to know. Here's Chapter 19!

Chapter 19

            "What food do they serve here, Shrimp?" Vegeta asked Nadia as they finally pulled up into McDonald's parking lot, as Nadia had to stop at the bank to get some money. She assumed it was going to cost more than a tenner to feed herself, her brother, her friend and a Saiyan. Nadia had persuaded her brother to drive them all otherwise she would 'Tell mum where you stash your porno mags. Aha, didn't think I knew about that, huh? Personally, I find it sick to keep them next to the bear you've had since you were born.'

            "Stop calling me that!" Nadia protested.

            "Never! I can't believe I didn't think of it earlier. You have any interesting nicknames?" Vegeta asked Yoli, an evil glint in his eyes.

            "They serve fast food, the best thing since 'Hamster Hotels'!" Yoli said, purposely ignoring his question.

            "Uh…don't you guys think someone will notice that there's a fucking cartoon guy dressed in a cotton jumpsuit?!" Joe screamed, smoke producing from his ears.

            "It's spandex you baka." Vegeta glared at Joe, who ignored him.

            "Oh, it sure is." Yoli said, looking longingly at the Saiyan Prince.

"Whatever. Someone will notice though!" 

            "Um…I know!" Nadia leant across Yoli and fished a pair of sunglasses from the side-pocket of the door.

            "Oh no! I am not wearing those monstrosities!" Vegeta objected, backing away.

            "C'mon Vegeta! Otherwise, you won't get served. No glasses, no food." Nadia reasoned, dangling the glasses in front of him.

            "But…fine." Vegeta hesitated before taking the glasses and slipping them on.

            "Did it suddenly get hot in here?" Yoli asked, fanning herself once she saw Vegeta.

            "I dunno what he has that I don't." Joe mumbled from the drivers seat, turning off the engine.

            "A six-pack, cute ass, looks great in spandex, gravity-defying hair, a look that can kill-and does, big bang and final flash attacks and a tail." Yoli finished triumphantly, grinning.

            "I so do have a tail!" Joe objected.

            "Yeah, what the girl said. What?! You have a tail? That is not possible! Show me at once!" Vegeta demanded.

            "What the hell? Nadia, is he queer? No man! Let go of my arm! I am not showing you my tail, you perv!" Joe said panicky, his face going red.

            "No Vegeta! He doesn't mean a Saiyan tail! He means, uh, another tail!" Nadia said, laughing hysterically.

            "What? Another tail? Is he of some sort of other species?" Vegeta asked, letting go off Joe's arm.

            "No, he means his, uh, thingy." Nadia said, pointing to the Southern region she was referring to.

            "Oh! That tail! You baka humans with your stupid slang." Vegeta said sulkily, a hint of red lining his cheeks.

            "What kinda tail did you think I meant?" Joe asked, his breathing returning to normal.

            "Uh, nothing." Nadia said.

            "Yeah, lets go. I'm starved!" Yoli said, as they all got out of the car and made their way to McDonald's after Joe had locked the car.

            "Ok, what do you want?" Nadia asked Vegeta once they'd joined the queue.

            "Food."

            "What kind of food, damnit?" Nadia asked. "Uh, Mr Prince of all Saiyans, sir." She added hastily as Vegeta lifted his hand threateningly.

            "I'm not sure. Whatever is good, and lots of it." Vegeta stated.

            "OK. Yoli, what about you?" Nadia asked her friend.

            "I'll have a chicken nugget Happy Meal with Fanta, no ice. You get 'Bill and Ben' stuff!" Yoli grinned.

            "Right…anywho, what do you want, asshole?" Nadia addressed her brother.

            "Same as always, bitch." Joe replied.

            "McChicken meal with Sprite, spaz?" Nadia asked.

            "That's the one, Shrimp." Joe grinned as Nadia stuck her finger up at him. Yoli, Vegeta and Joe went to get a booth whilst Nadia was getting served.

            "Ok, I'll have a large McChicken meal, with Sprite and no lettuce. A chicken nugget Happy Meal, Fanta, no ice, a medium cheese burger meal, no geurkins, relish, cheese or mustard with a Coke and some barbecue sauce. Finally, um, about thirty quarter-pounder meals with water, super-size. Thanks." Nadia rattled off her list.

            "Uh…ok…" The pretty teenage girl behind the counter blinked a couple of times, but entered the order, regardless. "Wouldn't the cheese burger just be a simple hamburger meal if you don't want cheese?"

            "No. I want a cheese burger, but with no cheese." Nadia justified herself.

            "Exactly, a hamburger."

            "No, it'd be a cheese burger, but with no cheese."

            "Yeah, I know. A hamburger."

            "No! I asked for a cheese burger, no cheese. It's still a cheese burger, just without the cheese!" Nadia said, through clenched teeth.

            "Yes, but wouldn't that be a hamb-"

            "No, damnit! What is so fucking hard about this order? I ask for thirty quarter-pounder's, I understand a bit of trouble with that, but I just want a fucking cheese burger, with no goddamn cheese! Jesus!" Nadia screamed at the server, who quickly grabbed her orders except Vegeta's and dumped them on a tray.

            "Uh, there you go. No charge, please enjoy your meal. The quarter-pounder meals will be ready soon." The server said hurriedly.

            "Thanks." Nadia smiled sweetly as she went to join the others.

            "What was all that about?" Joe asked his sister, grabbing his fries and shovelling them into his mouth.

            "I asked for a cheese burger with no cheese and-" Nadia began.

            "Wouldn't that just be a hamburger? Uh, nevermind." Yoli muttered as Nadia sent her an evil glare.

            "Shrimp, where the hell is my food?" Vegeta demanded, his mouth watering at the sight of food.

            "Its not ready yet." Nadia said.

            "What? That's an outrage! I demand to-" Vegeta trailed off as Nadia interrupted him.

            "Its ready. You can go get it, it'll be bloody heavy." Nadia said, sitting down as Vegeta got up and made his way to the counter.

            "Are you sure it's a good idea sending him?" Joe asked, looking around to check whether anyone he knew could see him eating with his sister, her kid friend and an anime character.

            "Of course, Vegeta wouldn't be that stupid. I hope. What do you think, Yoli?" Nadia asked her friend. "Yoli?"

            "Huh?" Yoli asked.

            "What's wrong? What were you looking at?" Nadia tried to follow where Yoli's gaze had been earlier.

            "I don't believe it!" Yoli hissed.

            "Believe what?" 

            "Look!" Yoli pointed to Vegeta and the pretty server.

            "Yeah, what am I looking at?" Nadia asked, confused.

            "She's flirting with him!" Yoli said, disgustedly.

            "No she isn't!" Nadia scoffed.

            "Oh yes she is and…oh my God!"

            "What?" Nadia asked, craning her neck.

            "He's flirting back!"


	20. Yaoi Hunting

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Here's Chapter 20!

Chapter 20

            "What?" Nadia asked, spluttering on her coke.

            "Mmmmf moof mfff hmmm?" Joe asked, his mouth full of fries.

            "Oh, my mistake. But she's still flirting with him!" Yoli objected.

            "God, I nearly had a heart attack then. Vegeta, flirting? Not possible." Nadia shook her head.

            "C'mon." Yoli pulled Nadia up from her seat.

            "Hey! Where are we going?" Nadia dropped her coke on the table, nearly spilling the contents.

            "To kick that bitch's ass! I may have been imagining Vegeta flirting, but that waitress is trying to steal my Skittles!" Yoli stalked over to the counter.

            "I'll stay here!" Joe called to them, fixing his eyes on Nadia's fries.

            "…so, you must work out. With muscles like that." Yoli's face went red as she heard a snippet of Vegeta and the waitress' conversation. The waitress began stroking Vegeta's arm, much to the prince's dislike

            "Oi! Get off him, you whore!" Yoli yelled, causing Nadia to cringe and smile apologetically and the mothers covering their children's ears.

            "Excuse me? Can I help you?" The waitress asked, seemingly annoyed at being interrupted while at 'work'.

            "No, but get the fuck off him! Do you know who he is? He is Vegeta, the pri…uh, what I mean is, he is Vegeta, the best dad in the whole world?" Yoli looked uncertain at her cover-up.

            "Uh, yeah. C'mon dad." Nadia rolled her eyes, but still went along with Yoli's story.

            "Alright…honey." Vegeta cringed at this, and no doubt it took him all his strength to say it. Yoli led the way to the car, grinning foolishly. Then again, its not everyday you get called 'honey' by the Prince of all Saiyans.

            "Oi! Asshole! Move it!" Nadia yelled at her brother, who was polishing off Nadia's burger, the last of what was left. Taking a final swig of coke, he grabbed his coat and followed Nadia, Yoli and Vegeta outside.

            "Do you humans normally behave like that?" Vegeta asked, once they were in the car.

            "Uh…no. Well, yes. I dunno. Depends what you mean. She obviously fancied you so…"

            "What?" Vegeta shouted at Yoli.

            "Hey! It wasn't me! It was her! Stupid slut." Yoli muttered.

            "Which reminds me, I never got any food." Vegeta complained.

            "I did." Joe patted his stomach with one hand, the other still on the steering wheel.

            "I guess we'll order pizza." Nadia muttered, making a mental note to get money from the University for feeding the prince.

            "Order? Have you suddenly become rich or something? And now I have a chance to ask, what the fuck is this guy doing here?" Joe said, occasionally glancing from the road to his sister.

            "I am the Prince of all Saiya-jins you baka!" Vegeta bellowed from the backseat.

            "I know who you are! This crazy bitch has you plastered all over her wall!" Joe pointed at his sister. "Besides, what are you doing here? I mean, you don't ride horses do you? I thought Nadia riding them was strange but you? Now that's just plain scary."

            "Of course not!" Vegeta replied, seeming somewhat distracted. He was trying to keep Yoli from touching him, a very hard job.

            "Well, uh, we kinda weren't at a horse riding thing. We were at the Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z." Nadia studied her brother's face.

            "Right. Well, uh, good for you? Damn, I knew you were obsessed with that guy, but to go to a University? I knew there was something wrong with you." Joe shook his head.

            "Obsessed? With me? About time someone was." Vegeta huffed, threatening Yoli with a ki blast if she didn't stop stroking his shoulder.

            "Anyway, I'm ordering pizza because I don't think its wise to enter a pizza place with him." Nadia pointed to Vegeta. "Besides, its dad's treat. About time he did something for me for once."

            "Amen to that." Joe said, pulling into their driveway.

            "Right then, what does everyone want?" Nadia asked, walking into the house closely followed by Yoli, Vegeta and her brother. She picked up a pizza pamphlet that was next to the phone.

            "Anything. Just lots of it." Vegeta groaned, looking like he was going to pass out.

            "Not hungry." Yoli stated, flicking on the TV.

            "I'll have a large pepperoni." Joe sat next to Yoli.

            "What? You ate everyone's McDonalds!" Nadia protested.

            "That was just a snack. Now hurry your arse, I'm fucking starving!" 

            "Couldn't of put it better myself." Vegeta smirked.

            "Greedy asshole." Nadia muttered, dialling the number. He was so thin aswell, Joe was. Yet he could eat anything. "Yeah, hello. Could I have thirty-one, large pepperoni pizza's please? Yeah, it's a party. 74 Healey Wood Road. Ok, thanks." Nadia replaced the receiver.

            "How much longer?" Joe moaned.

            "Five minutes, it's only up the corner. I would've picked them up but I've never carried thirty one pizzas before and I'm assuming it'd be very difficult." Nadia flopped onto the sofa.

            "Oh, Ryan dropped your computer off today. Called me whilst we were in McDonalds. He plugged it up and everything for you, so no more death threats." Joe told Nadia, who grinned.

            "Yes!" She roared, leaping off the sofa as the doorbell rang. It was the pizza guy. She paid him and took the pizzas, stumbling into the room with them and dropping them on the floor. "There ya go. C'mon, Yoli. Lets go check out my comp." Nadia ran upstairs, Yoli not close behind.

            "Turn it on then." Yoli prompted once they'd reached Nadia's room. 

            "K." Nadia sat down and switched on the computer, waiting for it to load. Once it had loaded onto her Vegeta desktop, she connected to the Internet. Her browser popped up and she entered 'www.fanfiction.net' into the address bar.

            "Cool! Go on anime! Go on anime!" Yoli encouraged.

            "Obviously. Where else would I go?" Nadia laughed at her question, knowing she'd never go anywhere other than the anime section. "Now, lets see if we can find us some quality yaoi." Nadia grinned, searching through the fiction.

A/N2: Sorry at the lack of updates, I'm ill . Poor me. Tsk tsk, dirty-minded Nadia! Wonder what'd happen if Vegeta finished his pizzas and decided to see what the girls were doing…?


	21. Fade To Black

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Sorry about the daily updates being reduced to practically once a week, but I've got tonsillitis (thanks to my best friend) and I'm not really up to writing at the moment, which is why it's so short. With that all said and done, here's Chapter 21.

Chapter 21

            "Now that creates a good mental picture." Nadia grinned, reviewing the fic she and Yoli had just read.

            "Ooo! Ooo! Kakkorrot and Skittles yaoi, thirty six chapters!" Yoli called, pointing at the screen and smiling as Nadia clicked on the link.

            "Woah, this is good." Nadia stated, edging closer to the screen.

            "What's good?" A voice demanded. Nadia gulped and looked over at the door to where Vegeta was leaning against the doorframe.

            "Hey Skittles! I see you've finished your pizza?" Yoli asked, standing in front of the computer screen.

            "Obviously, you baka. What are you looking at?" Vegeta narrowed his eyes.

            "Looking? Who's looking? I don't look." Nadia stammered, also standing in front of the screen.

            "Out of my way." Vegeta casually moved his arm, which sent the two girls sprawling to the other side of the room.

            "I can explain…" Nadia started.

            "What the fuck is this piece of crap? What? Oh no! Who the hell wrote this? You?" Vegeta demanded all at once, pointing accusingly at Nadia, the vein on his forehead looking as if it was fit to burst.

            "What? Me? No…I didn't." Nadia uttered.

            "Then who? Tell me who the bakayaro was so I can kill them!" Vegeta threatened, his hands clenched.

            "Dark-Angel from the looks of things." Yoli peered at the author's name.

            "Right." Vegeta said, flying out of Nadia's window and full speed.

            "What? Where's he going? Yoli you idiot! Now we won't be able to…" Nadia stopped as Vegeta flew back through the window, this time with a frightened girl in his grip.

            "Is this the baka?" Vegeta demanded, tightening his grip.

            "Oh wow! Vegeta! How cool! Hi! I'm like, your biggest fan!" The girl grinned.

            "Vegeta put her down! She didn't write that story!" Nadia lied for the benefit of the teenage girl.

            "Then who did?" Vegeta asked, lessening his grip.

            "Wow, Vegeta! I'm Dark-Angel, your number one fan!" Dark-Angel ignored the low growl this got from Yoli.

            "Fan? I have fans?" Vegeta asked, dropping Dark-Angel in disbelief.

            "Uh huh! We all love you, Vegeta Prince of all Saiya-jins." Dark-Angel nodded her head up and down, ignoring the fact that strands of hair were falling in front of her face.

            "Yeah, Skittles." Yoli emphasised 'Skittles', trying to make the girl see that she'd already staked out Vegeta. Dark-Angel was either oblivious or simply not bothered. "People have shrines of you on the 'net!" 

            "Shrines? Hmm, about time." Vegeta smirked. "So show me these infamous shrines."

            "Uh, ok, I guess." Nadia said, walking over to her computer and opening her favourites list. She wasn't quite sure about this but shrugged it off. Double-clicking her favourite site, she waited for it to load.

            "That's me!" Vegeta stared in disbelief as a large picture of him Super Saiyan appeared on the screen.

            "Yeah, we can look at clips, pictures, fiction, information, all sorts!" Nadia said, showing him the contents of the site.

            "Yeah, ALL kinds of pictures." Yoli said, smirking. When Vegeta didn't respond, she looked over at him and saw him gawking in disbelief.

            "This is just…" Vegeta trailed off, walking backwards and sitting on the bed.

            "No, Vegeta!" Nadia called, but it was too late.

            "Whats this?" Vegeta asked, instantly dropping the item when he realised what it was. A figurine. Of him. A figurine of him in a girl's bedroom. Strange. "What else is here?" Vegeta mumbled numbly. "What the fuck?" He shrieked when he found the thousands of posters, sketches, videos and some other various Vegeta-related things.

            "Skittles?" Yoli asked as Vegeta hit the floor with a loud 'thud'. 

            "Wow, you have the Prince of all Saiya-jins up here, in your room, unconscious. I wonder what we can do?" Dark-Angel asked, rubbing her hands together. 


	22. Night Night

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey all! I'm still ill, but thanks for the get wells ^_^. How are you all doing? Hope everyone is well. Here's Chapter 22.

Chapter 22

            "Nadia, have you seen the…damn." Joe said, peering around the door of Nadia's bedroom.

            "What do you want?" Nadia snapped.

            "Why is he up here? Nadia! What are you doing?" Joe demanded.

            "Nothing, just hanging." Nadia shrugged.

            "Nothing? Why is he up here? Why isn't he moving? Why is he covered in whipped cream? Oh god, I do not need to see this."

            "Uh…hey Nadia's brother." Dark-Angel waved.

            "Right, downstairs, all three of you." 

            "But…" Nadia gave up before she'd even begun when she saw her brother's steely glare.

            "We were so close aswell." Yoli shook her head, giving the unconscious Vegeta one last glance before heading downstairs.

            "Ah well, we can always dream. Or write." Dark-Angel added, following Nadia and Yoli.

            "God, you three are gross. Downstairs, I'm sure none of you wanna be up here when he wakes up." Joe closed the bedroom door behind him, leaving the Saiyan Prince on Nadia's bedroom floor, an empty can of whipped cream lying next to him.

~*~

            "Right, he's awake. No smart-ass comments, ok? We know nothing!" Joe ordered the three girls as he heard the floorboards above him creak. The girls simply nodded.

            "Which one of you deranged, insane, idiotic, disgraceful, imbecilic ikeikes did this?" Vegeta roared, stepping into the living room and towelling some whipped cream out of his hair.

            "Excuse me? Sorry, we don't know what you're talking about, do we guys?" Nadia asked everyone, who nodded rapidly in response.

            "Don't give me that bullshit. What did you do to me?" Vegeta demanded, throwing the whipped cream encrusted towel on the floor.

            "We didn't do anything Skittles, unfortunately." Yoli sighed.

            "Baka humans." Vegeta sat down grumpily.

            "He looks so different without whipped cream." Dark-Angel whispered to Nadia, who nodded in agreement.

            "You!" Vegeta pointed accusingly at Dark-Angel. His face got redder, and 'the' vein protruding from his forehead started to throb crazily.

            "Now, now. I'm sure we can sort all this out." Joe stood in the middle of Vegeta and Dark-Angel as Yoli and Nadia looked on. "Maybe not." Joe muttered as Vegeta swatted him to the other side of the room, a large 'thud' occurring when he hit the wall and slid down painfully.

            "I am sick of you baka's! I can not believe that I, Prince Vegeta of the Saiya-jins, had to come to this pathetic excuse of a dimension and baby sit you!" Vegeta spat. "And to make matters worse, I also have to deal with your dumbass brother over there and this sex-obsessed lunatic!" Vegeta pointed at Dark-Angel.

            "Skittles, we're all sex-obsessed lunatics when it comes to you!" Yoli helpfully pointed out.

            "FINAL FLASH!" Vegeta roared, a huge beam of light emitting from his outstretched hand. Dark-Angel, Yoli and Nadia quickly ducked as the beam roared past them and crashed through the front of the house. The blast exploded, sending Joe, who had just climbed to his feet, hurtling backwards into the TV. Everyone, save Vegeta, covered their eyes with their arms from the bright, white light that had exploded. Nadia was the first to uncover her eyes, and tentatively walked over to the huge gaping hole in the front of the house. Piles of rubble and debris were collecting on the street, as were various neighbours and passers-by.

            "Holy shit." Nadia muttered, then gasped as she stood on a piece of glass. She realised she still didn't have on any shoes since someone stole them at the University.

            "Skittles!" Yoli protested.

            "Shut up, baka. Its your own faults for provoking me." Vegeta stalked off towards the kitchen.

            "Its his fault for wearing spandex!" Dark-Angel stated.

            "Dear! Are you ok, dear? Dear?" An elderly voice asked Nadia as she pulled the piece of glass out of her foot.

            "Oh, hey Mrs Treyte. I'm fine." Nadia grimaced as she saw the old woman walking towards her. 'Nosey old bag.' She thought.

            "Oh dear, what happened here, dear?"

            "I…uh…got mad at my brother and…uh…accidentally threw a…Mars Bar at him…?" Nadia stuttered.

            "Excuse me, dear?" Mrs Treyte asked, thinking she had misheard.

            "I threw a Mars Bar at my brother 'cos I was mad. Jeez, my mom was right, they are really fattening if they could blow a hole in my living room. I'll never play with my food again." Nadia laughed weakly, mentally telling herself off for being such a dumbass.

            "Oh. I see. Bye dear." Mrs Treyte scuttled off, seeing nothing interesting had happened after all. Seeing Mrs Treyte leave, the crowd that had formed quickly dispersed too.

            "Damn, how dumb are people around here?" Nadia asked as soon as everyone had gone, not believing they had fallen for the Mars Bar story.

            "Not as dumb as you; 'My mom was right, they are really fattening. I'll never play with my food again.'" Dark-Angel mocked.

            "Hey, I don't think well under pressure. Damn, I can't believe Vegeta! How the hell are we gonna clean this up?" Nadia pondered aloud.

            "Its alright for you! You'll be gone by the time mom and dad gets home! I'll be here, to explain the missing whipped cream, the freaky stuff under your bed, the hole in the living room, the fact that there is no food left!" Joe wailed, hearing Vegeta banging around in the kitchen for something to eat.

            "You're right! I don't have to do a thing! I'll be gone by the time they get back! Yay!" Nadia cheered, walking into the kitchen, ignoring Joe's inconsistent sobbing.

            "Aw, Skittles, you should've said you were hungry, I could've fixed you something." Yoli offered.

            "Ha! You? I think not! I'll inform you the next time I want to spend six whole hours sitting on the toilet when I could be training!" Vegeta smirked, before digging into the 'snack' he'd fixed himself, a huge sandwich.

            "I'm going to bed." Nadia groaned, walking upstairs, closely followed by Yoli and Dark-Angel.

            "Uh…do you mind if I stay over tonight? It's a long way from here to my house." Dark-Angel asked.

            "Sure, where do you live?" Nadia asked.

            "America." Dark-Angel stated.

            "What?" Nadia asked, nearly falling down the stairs she had just climbed.

            "Well, I guess Vegeta can fly pretty fast if he can get from England to America in the space of four seconds." Yoli said, flopping onto Nadia's bed and yawning.

            "I'll ask Vegeta to take you back home tomorrow." Nadia yawned, getting out two sleeping bags, one for Yoli and one for Dark-Angel.

            "Hmm, I wonder what size feet Vegeta has." Dark-Angel wondered aloud as she settled into her sleeping bag.

            "Feet? Why?" Nadia asked.

            "You know what they say about guys with big feet…" Dark-Angel winked.

            "Yeah, big socks!" Yoli laughed, which reminded Nadia to grab some socks and shoes before they left for the University. She was sure someone was stealing them. "Ya know, we've seen Skittles naked."

            "Yeah right, you and every other rabid fan girl." Dark-Angel scoffed.

            "No, really! We got video footage!" Yoli grinned.

            "Yoli, shut up!" Nadia threw a pillow at her friend.

            "Really? You lucky bitches!" Dark-Angel said, her voice dripping with envy.

            "Yeah, and at the University he teaches us in the Gravity Room, sweating and everything!" Yoli grinned.

            "Wearing spandex?" Dark-Angel asked hopefully.

            "Uh huh!" Yoli grinned.

            "Not fair." Dark-Angel moaned.

            "I'll send you some pictures when I get back to the University. Just leave me your address and I'll send them." Yoli promised.

            "Ok, great!" Dark-Angel said enthusiastically. "'Night then."

            "'Night." Yoli replied.

            "Goodnight." Nadia said to them both, turning off the light and sending the room into darkness. Everything was silent.

            "NADIA! HELP!"

A/N2: Oooo, cliffie! Hmm, this chapter got me wondering, does Vegeta even wear socks?

            Quorky: You ask some queer questions.

            I'm just wondering! Do you know?

            Quorky: Why the hell would I know?

            I dunno, do you wear socks?

            Quorky: Only your bed socks cos they're cool and light up in the dark.

            Ew! You've been wearing my socks?

            Quorky: I'll give 'em you back if ya want.

            No, that's alright…you keep them…


	23. Nice Trip

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Here's Chapter 23.

Chapter 23

            "What the hell is that?" Dark-Angel asked, following Nadia and Yoli as they ran towards Joe's bedroom

            "I already told you, it was accidental!" Joe's cries came as Nadia pushed open his bedroom door.

            "Vegeta, what are you doing?" Nadia asked groggily, shielding her eyes from the overhead light.

            "This baka touched my ass!" Vegeta growled from the corner, where he had Joe in a headlock.

            "Some people have all the luck." Dark-Angel muttered.

            "What?" Nadia screamed.

            "I did not! Well I did…but it was accidental!" Joe defended himself.

            "Joe, it is not possible to touch someone's backside 'accidentally'." Nadia looked at her brother strangely.

            "But I did! I didn't know he'd be in my room! Why is he in my room?" Joe demanded.

            "I am the Prince of all Saiya-jins, I am not sleeping on the sofa." Vegeta replied indignantly, pressing harder into Joe's throat.

            "N…N…Nadia!" Joe managed to choke out.

            "Vegeta let go off him. As much as I'd like you to kill him, I doubt he touched your ass on purpose, OK?" Nadia reasoned.

            "Stupid baka's." Vegeta muttered, reluctantly letting go of Joe. "He can stay downstairs. I don't trust him in the same room as me." Vegeta narrowed his eyes at Joe, who's face was slowly returning from lobster red to its normal tanned colour.

            "I tripped onto his ass." Joe muttered his explanation, before grabbing his quilt and heading downstairs.

            "Right, I'm going back to bed. Goodnight." Nadia yawned, padding back into her room.

            "Hmmm, 'I tripped onto his ass', gotta remember that one." Dark-Angel said, writing it onto a pad of paper that was in her pyjama pocket. 

            "Looks like we've got more competition for Skittles now." Yoli laughed.

            "Guys, my brother's not gay. At least, he wasn't before I went to the University." Nadia said, climbing back into her bed.

            "Yeah, but Vegeta's enough to make the straightest guy gay." Dark-Angel grinned sleepily, climbing into her sleeping bag.

~*~

            "Morning." Joe said to Nadia and he friends as they came downstairs.

            "Gerum." Nadia muttered, the only word she spoke in a morning.

            "I'm making eggs. There's already loads on the table, they're for him." Joe said 'him' with much resentment. 

            "Are you sure you're not gay, Joe? I mean, I wouldn't mind or anything." Nadia looked at her brother.

            "No! I'm telling you, it was an accident!" Joe brushed his brown bangs from his forehead as he started making bacon.

            "Yeah, yeah. You tripped onto his ass." Nadia sat at the table.

            "I did!" Joe said in his defence. 

            "I'm sure you did. Well, Vegeta ain't a happy bunny, whether it was accidental or not." Nadia said. As if on cue, Vegeta came downstairs.

            "You're up early." Yoli said, somewhat disappointed. She'd wanted to catch him in the shower, so she could compare the video footage to real life.

            "I've been up hours, baka." Vegeta simply stated, sitting down at the table and piling his plate high with eggs.

            "I'm…uh…gonna just…" Joe bolted out of the kitchen as Vegeta came down, leaving the bacon spitting in the pan.

            "Grrr, baka weakling." Vegeta muttered through a mouthful of eggs.

            "Shit." Nadia cursed as she burnt herself taking the bacon out of the pan and piling it with the rest.

            "So, Skittles, whats on the agenda for today?" Yoli looked leeringly at Vegeta, who simply ignored her.

            "You need to take Dark-Angel home. I'm sure we've traumatised her enough, and her parents will be worried." Nadia said.

            "No." Vegeta said, tucking into some bacon.

            "What? How will she get home? Vegeta!" Nadia moaned.

            "Stop shrieking onna. She can get home herself."

            "But…but you brought her here!" Nadia complained.

            "Only because she was writing indecent stories about me and Kakkorrot." Vegeta gave a slight, almost unnoticeable, shudder.

            "We already told you, it wasn't her!" Nadia jumped to Dark-Angel's defence, who, since Vegeta had mentioned the yaoi, had lapsed into a daydream.

            "Yeah, she lives in America. I never did like Geography, but I'm betting it's a long way to walk there." Yoli said, looking up from her breakfast. Vegeta simply shook his head 'no'.

            "But Vegeta! You have to!" Nadia protested.

            "I don't have to do anything, baka."

            "Fine then." Nadia smirked. "Vegeta?"

            "What?" Vegeta snapped.

            "Nothing." Nadia grinned. "Vegeta?"

            "What?"

            "Nothing. Vegeta?"

            "What?"

            "Nothing." Nadia smirked evilly as Vegeta sent her a cold glare. "Vegeta?"

            "WHAT?"

            "Nothing. Vegeta?"

            "God damnit onna, what do you want?" Vegeta snapped.

            "Uh…nothing. Vegeta?" Nadia stared at Vegeta as he sat in silence. She kept staring.

            "Fine, what?" Vegeta gave in. He never could ignore questions.

            "Nothing." Nadia grinned as Vegeta growled. "Vegeta?"

            "What?"

            "Nothing, Vegeta?"

            "What?" Vegeta wailed, banging his fist onto the table making Nadia jump.

            "Nothing. Vegeta?"

~*~ (56 minutes later.) 

            "Oh, nothing. It doesn't matter. Vegeta?" Nadia said, not getting tired of this at all.

            "What, onna?" Vegeta snapped angrily. This was annoying.

            "Uh…just came to get some…" Joe entered the kitchen and grabbed a can of coke. He looked at everyone's faces as everything had gone silent except for Dark-Angel and Yoli who were quietly whispering amongst themselves. Joe quickly hurried out of the kitchen as Vegeta gave him an icy glare. Nadia opened her mouth to say something, the thought against it. Vegeta gave a sigh of relief, thinking Nadia had finally grown tired of her game.

            "Vegeta?" She asked whilst washing up.

            "Yes?" Vegeta hissed, praying she did, in fact, have a question for once.

            "Nothing." Nadia said, washing the frying pan. Vegeta waited for a couple of minutes and smirked when she didn't say anything else. He had won. He was about to voice his thoughts when she interrupted.

            "Vegeta?" Nadia smirked as Vegeta banged his head on the table.

A/N2: How annoying was that?

            Quorky: How do you think they feel? They had to read all that! I bet they've got headaches now.

            Shut up, otherwise you'll have a headache.

            Quorky: Ooooooo, is that a threat?

            No, just a promise ^_^

            Quorky: *rolls eyes* How original.

            Wow! You can roll your eyes! That's gotta be worth something!

            Quorky: Oh no…you're not gonna try sell me on Ebay again, are you?

            …muwhahahaha! 


	24. Vote Aqua Skittles Today!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N:  Hello my pretties! Wow, why do I have such cool reviewers with like the coolest names? 

Sayjin Girl: *Accepts award* I'd like to thank all ma reviewers, ma family, ma friends *tear* Oh yeah, and ma sock-thieving muse, Quorky.

Schizophrenic Eggplant: Cool name ^_^ Uh…I can't remember why I wrote down to mention you in ma Author's Note, but hi! Oh yeah, vote for Aqua Skittles today!

Dria: Um…I can't remember why I wrote you down either. Anywho, hiya! 

Jeril Dragonsoul: Update Twin Fighters sooooooon, pwease?

Here's Chapter 24.

Chapter 24

            "Ok! I will take her back! Just stop this infernal racket!" Vegeta roared.

            "Vegeta?" Nadia grinned.

            "Ah!" Vegeta said, hoisting Dark-Angel over his shoulder and flying out of the window.

            "Well, she seemed happy." Nadia said, emptying the sink.

            "Hey, she was on Skittles shoulder! The lucky sod!" Yoli said enviously.

            "Uh, can someone throw me a Kit Kat?" Joe peered around the door, then came into full view when he noticed Vegeta wasn't around.

            "Here." Nadia tossed him one.

            "Where's the spandex guy?" Joe munched on his biscuit. "I didn't mean it like that! I just don't know his name, 'Vegetable Flavoured Skittles' or something?" Joe said hurriedly as Nadia raised her eyebrows.

            "Don't worry Joe, I find the spandex very appealing myself." Yoli grinned at Nadia's brother, who blushed. 

            "I'm not gay!" Joe shouted.

            "Sure, sure. Hey, what took you so long?" Nadia asked Vegeta sarcastically, who had returned.

            "The stupid ikeike wouldn't let go of me!" Vegeta growled.

            "I don't blame her." Yoli muttered.

            "Oh crap! I'm late!" Joe wailed, searching for some shoes.

            "For what?" Nadia asked him.

            "Football practice! Aren't you coming?" Joe looked at his sister in surprise.

            "Of course! I'll have to tell coach I'm leaving though, as I'll be at the University." Nadia said, also searching for her football boots, she was still barefoot. Grabbing her boots, she and Yoli went upstairs to get changed, leaving Joe and Vegeta alone.

            "Uh…I'm gonna go…help them." Joe said worriedly. "Uh…I don't mean it like that…I'm gonna just…bye." Joe bolted out of the room.

~*~

            "What is this football you speak of?" Vegeta asked Nadia.

            "You've never played football? Wow. Well, uh, you get a ball and you, well, kick it." Nadia explained.

            "You're good at football then, Nadia?" Yoli asked from the backseat of Joe's car.

            "Yep. I'm Captain of my team, beating Joe, who's vice." Nadia grinned.

            "I gave you that position, I meant to be Vice Captain." Joe mumbled.

            "Uh huh, just like you 'tripped' onto Veggie-ta's ass." Nadia quickly covered her mistake.

            "I did! Why would I want to touch his ass?" Joe demanded. "Uh…no offence." He hurriedly added.

            "More like why wouldn't you want to touch his ass!" Yoli piped up from the back as Joe swung into the training ground's car park.

            "Can you all just shut up about my ass?" Vegeta roared, making the windows shudder. Joe killed the engine and stepped out. He was wearing his purple and black football kit, as was Nadia.

            "Hey coach!" Nadia called out.

            "Nadia! How's my Captain? Joe, you're late. You know the drill, five laps." The coach ordered Joe, who complied. He was used to Nadia getting the 'special treatment'. "Who are you two?"

            "This is my friend and…uh…my pen pal…from France. They're both staying with me and Joe." Nadia quickly informed the coach.

            "Oh, well hello. France, you say? He doesn't look very French." The coach studied Vegeta who was watching the rest of the team warming up.

            "I didn't say he was French, just that he was from France. He's Japanese." Nadia lied.

            "How peculiar." The coach looked at Vegeta once more, then turned back to Nadia.

            "I'm sorry coach, but this is my last day." Nadia said.

            "What? Why?" 

            "She's attending a Horse Riding Academy." Joe said, taking in mouthfuls of breath. He smirked at Nadia.

            "Is this true?" The coach asked Nadia.

            "Uh…yeah." Nadia glared at Joe.

            "Well, I suppose if that's what…"

            "Thanks coach! I'll go get warmed up." Nadia ran off towards her team before the coach could ask any more questions. Vegeta, Joe and Yoli followed her.

            "These pathetic humans have no idea how to warm up properly." Vegeta said, doing it the 'right' way. Yoli stood, watching in awe.

            "We're not getting ready to kill each other, Vegeta. We're just playing football." Nadia rolled her eyes, doing some kick-ups.

            "Hey, Goodyear. You're leaving for a Horse Riding school, huh? I always knew you couldn't handle it." A boy approached Nadia, sneering.

            "Whatever, Tim" Nadia turned her back on the boy who had approached her.

            "Ya know, I'm going to get Captain now you're gone." Tim went on.

            "Now Tim, what have I told you about telling porkies? You and I both know you'll be lucky to even make it past a sub." Nadia carried on with her warm-up.

            "Shut up, you little bitch. Just cos you're a girl doesn't mean I can't take you, and I will."

            "I may be a bitch, but I'm not that little, stupid asshole! If you wanna go that way, then fine, I'm game." Nadia dropped the ball and turned to face Tim.

            "OK, line up. Split into your teams, A and B." Coach blew his whistle and the team quickly split into two depending on which kit they had. Joe and Nadia were on the same team, along with the rest of Team A plus Vegeta. Tim was on Team B, with the substitutes. Yoli had decided to sit it out.

            "Positions." The coach called, and then blew his whistle as the teams quickly got into position. Nadia quickly took control of the ball, and skilfully manoeuvred it down to the other end of the pitch, passing it to Joe who was a striker. He kicked it into the back of the net with ease.

            "Alright!" Nadia cheered along with the rest of her team.

             "Get back." Tim called to the rest of his team. "They just got lucky." He called, taking the ball from a Team A player. He took it upwards towards the oppositions net.

            "Lucky, huh?" Nadia smirked at Tim as she tackled him, taking the ball past various B players. "Hey!" She protested as Tim kicked her shin then took the ball from her. "You dirty cheater!" Nadia gritted her teeth and ran after Tim.

            "As I said, lucky!" Tim shot the ball into the back of Team A's net.

            "We'll see who're lucky." Nadia took the ball on her knee from the goalie's kick then chipped it down the pitch. A boy with ginger hair from Team A greeted the ball, and hit it with the side of his left foot towards Vegeta. Vegeta had been just standing there, with his arms crossed in the middle of the pitch. Looking down at the ball, he softly kicked it towards the net, but underestimating his power, it sailed as fast as light towards the keeper, who jumped out of the way. It hit the net, which stretched far back, then let go with a 'ping'. The ball headed upwards on the pitch, heading for Team A's goal. As the ball started to lose speed, the keeper easily blocked the shot. The keeper then kicked the ball out towards Nadia, who took it past three B players before Tim came up behind and tripped her. "Ow!" The ground muffled Nadia's voice.

            "Foul!" Yoli called from the sidelines.

            "Right, that's it." Nadia said determinedly. She picked herself up and charged after Tim, tackling him, then took the ball down to the other end of the pitch. She passed it to Vegeta, who in turn hit it in the back of the net.

~*~

            "6-1! 6-1!" Nadia chanted, taking a drink of water.

            "Hey, nice playing guys!" Yoli came down to meet them.

            "Thanks." Nadia smiled.

            "Hey Skittles, you played good." Yoli looked up at Vegeta.

            "Of course I did, baka. It's a pathetic human game; of course I'm going to be good at it! I suppose it's alright, for a human game anyway." Vegeta said. He hadn't broken into a sweat at all. "I bet Kakkorrot's never heard of it. When we get back to the University I'm going to challenge him to a game. It will be one challenge he won't win."

            "Uh oh." Nadia looked at Yoli. "What have I started?"

A/N2: LOL! Vegeta and Goku playing football? Now that's a strange mental picture…

            Quorky: Aren't you getting writer's block yet? I'm tired!

            Psssh. Yeah right, I love this fic! *Hugglez the fic* Loadsa ideas, I have. Even ideas for Semester 2! I'm thinking of making this a trilogy, this part being Semester 1, the next Semester 2 and the last Semester 3.

            Quorky: Good for you.

            You're so mean!

            Quorky: So are you!

            Shut up.

            Quorky: See! I'll call the RSPCA

            They don't deal in muses!


	25. Vegeta, The Chat Show Addict

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N:  Heylo everyone! Here's Chapter 25.

Chapter 25

            "When will the cloud be here?" Vegeta asked impatiently. Joe, Vegeta, Yoli and Nadia were sat cross-legged in the living room, playing Monopoly. They were getting a lot of stares, probably because the huge gaping hole was still there. Joe had called the builders and they were coming first thing Tuesday morning, a week before his parents got home.

            "Stop changing the subject, I know you're trying to cheat!" Nadia narrowed her eyes at Vegeta who was eyeing her pile of money she'd been collecting.

            "The Prince of all Saiya-jins does not need to cheat!" Vegeta said haughtily.

            "Yeah right." Nadia muttered, rolling the dies; a twelve.

            "That's the fourth twelve you've got in a row! I think you're the one who's cheating here." Vegeta glared at Nadia.

            "Whoops. Wondered where these were." Joe took the dies and put them in his pocket.

            "Joe!" Nadia complained after a couple of minutes. No one else were bothered, they weren't winning.

            "It's hardly fair, Shrimp. These are my 'lucky dies'." Joe patted them in his pocket.

            "Fine then, you can all be sore losers." Nadia put the game away as they all sat in silence.

            "Sooooooo…" Yoli looked around the room, the silence making her uncomfortable.

            "Yeah." Nadia nodded her head.

            "Yep." Joe muttered, picking at his socks.

            "Joe, you still in that band?" Nadia struck up conversation.

            "Nope. Garry's mom didn't appreciate 'four teenage boys traipsing through her kitchen every day'." Joe answered.

            "That's a shame." Nadia said half-heartedly.

            "Yep." Joe nodded in response.

            "Sooooooo…" Yoli started up again.

            "Isn't there anything to do before that annoying cloud gets here? I never thought I'd say this but; I wish he'd hurry his ass!" Vegeta growled, the silence getting to him.

            "We could have another game of Monopoly." Nadia offered, shrinking back when loud shouts of 'no' greeted her ears.

            "Whats on TV?" Joe asked himself, switching on the television. The theme music for 'Jerry Springer' was playing, and the host cane into view.

            "Ooooo! Jerry Springer!" Yoli directed her gaze towards the TV.

            "I hate this show. I swear I wouldn't mind knocking all these annoying people out. They're so stupid!" Nadia got up and headed to the kitchen.

            "You're too weak to knock anyone out. You can't even stand in a fraction of Earth's gravity!" Vegeta called to her, his focus on the TV. He went into an extremely detailed account on how Nadia made a fool of herself in the Gravity Room.

            "Stupid assholes." Nadia muttered, slamming the refrigerator door shut as howls of laughter came from the living room. She poured herself a glass of milk.

            "Hey." Joe came into the kitchen and sat on a stool.

            "So, what're you going to do when mom and dad get home?" Nadia asked her brother.

            "I'll probably hide at Garry's for a couple of days." Joe grinned.

            "Touch that and you die!" Vegeta's voice boomed from the living room.

            "What the hell?" Nadia asked, running into the room. Vegeta was so close to the TV, his nose was practically touching the screen, whereas Yoli was cowering in a corner.

            "He's crazy!" Yoli yelled from her corner, pointing at Vegeta.

            "Quiet, baka. I'm listening!" Vegeta called, not taking his eyes off the TV.

            "What's with him?" Joe asked Yoli.

            "He's obsessed! He's gone crazy! I swear! I got the remote and was about to flick when he attacked me! Not the good kind of attacking either! I thought he was gonna kill me! He's a chat show freak!" Yoli spluttered.

            "Vegeta? A chat show addict?" Nadia burst into fits of laughter.

            "Hey! I'm a victim here!" Yoli stated indignantly.

            "Vegeta…are you alright?" Nadia crept slowly towards Vegeta.

            "Stay back!" Vegeta snarled once she came within 2 feet of the TV.

            "Hello all!" George called from the whole in the living room. "Looks like you've been having fun."

            "Oh yeah, great fun." Nadia muttered sarcastically.

            "What's that smell?" Yoli asked, sniffing the air.

            "Are you all, hiccup, ready then?" George asked.

            "Uh…George? Are you OK?" Nadia looked at the cloud strangely.

            "Of course, hiccup, dear! Why wouldn't, hiccup, I be?" George slurred.

            "You haven't been…drinking…or anything?" Nadia eyed the cloud suspiciously.

            "Moi? Drink? Never and never and boom!" George laughed at himself.

            "Oh crap." Nadia shook her head. Remembering Vegeta, she took the remote and switched off the TV.

            "Ahhhhh!" Vegeta screamed as the picture was reduced to a tiny black dot, then nothing.

            "C'mon Vegeta, snap out of it." Yoli clicked her fingers in front of the Prince's face.

            "But the…huh? What happened?" Vegeta demanded, his all too familiar scowl back on his face.

            "Oh, uh, nothing." Nadia said. "George, are you sober enough to take us back?"  
  


            "Cheerio! Mmmmm, I love that cereal, especially Honey Nut Cheerio's. Nummy." George answered.

            "Ah well, I suppose you'll do." Nadia sighed, grabbing her bag that was filled with socks and two pairs of trainers.****


	26. Geroge? Drunk? No!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey everyone! I have something to confess; you've all been enduring my senseless rants about aqua skittles blah, blah, blah, when, in fact, as you all know, it's M&M's. This is furthermore proof off my stupidity and short attention span. Anywho, on with tha fic!

Chapter 26

            "Holy shit! George, slow down!" Nadia screamed, holding on tightly.

            "I am slow! Slow as a, hiccup, snail. But I'm a, hiccup, cloud. How strange, hiccup." George slurred.

            "Nadia, something you wanna tell us?" Yoli looked at her friend.

            "Is this cloud drunk?" Vegeta demanded, a look of horror on his face. Wouldn't be a bright idea to take him to Alton Towers then.

            "Drunk? George? No!" Nadia lied.

            "I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here's my handle, hiccup. Oh, pardon me." George said in a singsong voice.

            "Like I said, he's not drunk at all." Nadia said, clutching her bag. She was feeling sick.

            "Slow down!" A cloud shouted at George after he nearly crashed into it.

            "Chill, grandma! Wheeeeeeeeeeee! I can fly!" George shouted, doing a triple turn over.

            "Oh shit…" Nadia covered her mouth.

            "Oh no. Nadia, you're not gonna…too late." Yoli muttered as Nadia threw up…all over Vegeta.

            "You stupid ikeike!" Vegeta cursed, looking at his vomit-covered spandex suit.

            "Such a shame. Looks like you'll have to take that off now." Yoli said, her hentai mind working overtime.

            "Hmph. You wish." Vegeta said, looking at the vomit and shuddering.

            "Sorry." Nadia smiled weakly.

            "I do wish, oh how I wish." Yoli shook her head regretfully.

~*~ (Seven hours and twenty painful minutes later, the four have just landed at the University, didn't time fly?)

            "George, I told you not to take that detour!" Nadia shouted at the cloud. They were five hours late and class started in fifteen minutes.

"But I needed a McFlurry, and can you get any louder?" George asked, his hangover kicking in.

            "I dunno…HOWS THIS YOU STUPID ASSHOLE OF A CLOUD?" Nadia screamed into, where she assumed, was George's ears.

            "God damnit, stop that!" George cringed.

            "Serves you right." Yoli said above a mouthful of fries.

            "Baka onna, just wait 'til Wednesday." Vegeta growled, walking off to get changed.

            "Oh great." Nadia rolled her eyes, imagining the pain Vegeta would inflict upon her.

            "Come on Nadia, we have to go. Frying pans with Chi Chi starts…oh fuck!" Yoli yelled as Nadia grabbed her bag of socks and shoes.

            "What?"  
  


            "Frying pan! I forgot to get the damn frying pan! I can't withstand five hours of her torture! It's not humanly possible! Hell, it's not even Saiyanly possible, as Kakkorrot proved." Yoli wailed.

            "Right, well I'll be off. I need some aspirin." George groaned, flying away.

            "I'm sure it'll be OK. They have loads of pans in the kitchen, we'll just get some from there!" Nadia said.

            "Genius, that's what you are, a genius!" Yoli hugged Nadia. "C'mon then, first stop, the kitchen!" 

~*~ (In the kitchen, that was quick!)

            "Where are they then?" Yoli asked, turning the place upside down.

            "Try the cupboard with the notice saying 'Frying Pans'." Nadia pointed.

            "How convenient." Yoli rummaged around to find one similar to the one she had earlier.

            "These types of fics usually are. Hurry up! I hear someone coming!" Nadia dove behind the counter as Buu came into view. (A/N: Heehee, I can rhyme!)

            "Buu get you food. Buu get you food. Stupid children. Think Buu slave. Me not slave. We show then. Yes, we show them." Buu muttered, carrying a huge tub of something. "Eek!"

            "Crap!" Yoli muttered, rubbing her head. Buu had tripped over her feet, sending the contents of the tub over her.

            "What you do in Buu's kitchen?" Buu demanded.

            "Yoli what…eep!" Nadia came out of hiding and slipped on the pink gunk splattered everywhere. She slid across to the other side of the kitchen and hit a pile of dishes, which crashed onto the floor around her.

            "Mmmm, special sauce!" Yoli licked one of her fingers appreciatively.

            "Jer was right, we didn't want to know." Nadia rubbed her head.

            "Buu get headmaster. Headmaster will sort this." Buu left the kitchen.

            "Quick! Run for it!" Yoli got up, sliding occasionally, and ran out of the kitchen, Nadia close behind.

            "This stuff is cold!" Nadia shivered as they ran up the staircase. Yoli was holding her bag of socks for her as she put on some shoes.

            "This way." Yoli sped down the corridor and burst into the room, pink gunk dripping off of her. Nadia ran into her, sending both girls toppling over. The contents of Nadia's bag spilled over, socks sticking to the gunk on both of the girls' bodies. Nadia had managed to get one shoe on, but the other, which was in her hand, came loose and went sailing over the heads of dozens of students, hitting Chi Chi smack bang on the forehead. 

            "Sorry we're late." Nadia groaned, wiping some gunk off of her face.

A/N2: Quorky: Well I can safely say that was the scariest chapter ever.

            I know. Anyway, I'm still not talking to you.

            Quorky: Over M&M's?  
  


            M&M's are very important! We want aqua M&M's, not pink or purple!

            Quorky: I thought the purple ones were quite spiffy.

            TRAITOR! 


	27. Who's Skittles?

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey, Goku's in this chapter. Just to say, I personally have nothing against Goku, but Nadia and Yoli do. Therefore there will be some smartass comments about him that won't please a Goku fan. Please remember, it is Nadia and Yoli speaking, not me.

Sayjin Girl: My chapters probably are getting shorter, but what do you expect for practically once a day updating?

Jeril: That cliffie on 'Another Boring Day…NOT' was sooooo mean! Evilness, pure evilness!

Dark-Angel: Update sooooooon, pwease?

Chapter 27

             "You are not late." Chi Chi smiled sweetly at the girls. "Arriving to class covered in pink gunk and socks, throwing a shoe at me and being fifteen minutes late is more than late!" Chi Chi screamed, brandishing a frying pan in her hand. She threw it at Yoli in her rage and it narrowly missed the girl's ear. 

            "Looks like someone's not getting any." Yoli whispered her death wish to Nadia.

            "What was that? Right, that's it! Watching a video on frying pans is not punishment enough! March yourselves down to the Gravity Room, maybe Vegeta can teach you a lesson or two!" Chi Chi barked.

            "Oh god yes, maybe he can!" Yoli commented.

            "Vegeta fans? Don't we suffer enough? Fine then, get to the Gravity Room opposite the fountain – Goku's." Chi Chi smirked a very Saiyan-like smirk and turned her back on Yoli and Nadia.

            "Thanks a lot Yoli!" Nadia muttered, pulling a peach sock off of herself and flinging it at her friend.

~*~ (Outside the Gravity Room)

            "No, you go first!" Nadia pushed Yoli. "You got us into this mess!"  
  


            "No, you go first!" Yoli pushed Nadia.

            "No, you!" Nadia pushed Yoli as hard as she could and both girls went flying into the Gravity Room.

            "Huh? Who're you?" Goku looked up from the Gravity Room panel to see both girls, still covered in pink gunk and socks, come flying through the door. "Good job I didn't switch on the gravity otherwise you two would be dead by now!" Goku laughed.

            "Oh yeah, I always find someone making cracks about me dying hilarious." Yoli muttered sourly.

            "If only the gravity was on. Kami, why do you mock me so?" Nadia looked up at the ceiling of the room.

            "Heehee, yeah." Goku muttered, rubbing the back of his neck.

            "Right, well Chi Chi sent us down here for being 'late', but since it was the fault of our drunken cloud we'll be going now." Yoli said, her and Nadia heading out of the Gravity Room.

            "Hold it." Goku said as Nadia and Yoli stopped in mid-stride. "If you were sent here for punishment, I suppose I better punish you."

            "Come again?" Nadia asked.

            "Aren't you supposed to be a dumbfuck or something?" Yoli looked at Goku strangely.

            "What? No! Damn, I'm getting sick of everyone saying that!" Goku moaned.

            "Chill Kakkorrot!" Yoli muttered.

            "Lemme guess, Vegeta fans?" Goku asked wearily.

            "And damn proud of it!" Nadia stated.

            "I've saved the Earth and its Universe countless times, and things like this still happen to me!" Goku wailed.

            "Right…should we come back?" Yoli asked, looking a little scared.

            "No, no. Wouldn't want to get Chi Chi mad now, would I?" Goku gave a little smile.

            "Psssh, damn right we wouldn't." Yoli groaned, touching her ear, which very nearly got knocked off by the 'Frying Pan Queen'.

            "Right, well, punishment. Lets see…you can clean my Gravity Room I suppose. The kitchen, bathroom and dining room." Goku said to them.

            "Really? That's like totally easy! I mean, oh man, that's major punishment." Yoli swiftly changed her tune when Nadia shot her an icy look.

            "I'll start with the kitchen, you can do the bathroom." Nadia said, making her way to the kitchen.

            ""There's cleaning supplies under the sink." Goku called, waiting for them to leave the training part of the room so he could turn up the gravity.

            "I can't believe how easy…oh my Kami. This is gross." Nadia wrinkled her nose in disgust as the rancid smell was first to make itself noticeable.

~*~ 

            "Stupid Kakkorrot. Thinking he's so smart tricking us. I'll show him. I don't give a shit whether he's the strongest fighter in the Universe." Nadia ranted as she scrubbed the kitchen floor. If anyone had entered at that moment, they'd have only thought she'd been cleaning for ten minutes, when, in fact, it had been two hours. Upon entering the kitchen, Nadia found empty beer cans strewn everywhere, paper cups and plates squashed beyond recognition, vomit encrusted tiles, pans with god-knows-what stuck to the bottom of them, silly string strung around and a pair of big, brown pants that Nadia hadn't even bothered to move yet. It was after Nadia had stopped screaming that Goku had informed her that 'Yamcha held a party here last night. Looks like they had a lot of fun, no?"

            "Why am I allowed to live?" Nadia heard Yoli's wails all the way from the bathroom.

            "Oh well, at least I don't have Yoli's job." Nadia muttered, trying to put a positive spin on her situation. She picked up a blue piece of fabric and shrieked, sending it flying across the room, when she realised what it was – a G-string. "I hope Yoli's having better look than me." 

            "Oh Kami that is vile. That is so sick." Nadia winced as she heard Yoli throw up. "Kakkorrot!" Yoli screamed, causing the whole chamber to shudder.

~*~ 

            "Yes, it was disgusting. It was Hell on Earth, I swear. Dumbass Yamcha and his parties, I don't want to know what they do at his parties with pieces of rope, cheese whiz and a bucket of ice." Yoli shuddered. "I cannot believe I got tricked by Goku, Goku of all people!" She ranted, sitting on her bed in the dorm.

            "Hmmm…something sounded different then, Yoli." Sai studied Yoli curiously. She had arrived on time and safely, as her cloud wasn't drunk.

            "Yeah, it did." Nadia also studied Yoli, trying to figure out what was different.

            "Did you see Goku working out? Damn, are them some fine muscles!" Yoli said with a gleam in her eye.

            "Ouch!" Sai and Nadia said simultaneously as they both fell off the bed. "Yoli…are you feeling OK?" Sai asked her friend, looking sincerely worried.

            "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Yoli asked, a look of confusion claiming her features.

            "One; you just called Kakkorrot, Goku. Two; you said he had, and I quote, 'fine muscles'." Nadia felt Yoli's forehead.

            "Well, Goku is his name isn't he? And of course he has fine muscles, he's the strongest warrior in the Universe!" Yoli stated.

            "What?" Nadia gasped.

            "I think we better call the nurse." Sai said, getting up and leaving the room.

            "You take that back!" Nadia commanded her friend.

            "Nu uh! My lil' Goku IS the strongest warrior in the Universe!"

            "'Lil' Goku'? What the hell is wrong with you? What happened to Skittles?" Nadia asked.

            "Who's Skittles?"

A/N2: *Gasp* Whats wrong with Yoli? How can she forget Skittles?

            Quorky: Maybe that pink gunk had some kinda…

            *Covers monkey's mouth* Shhhh! You're giving it away!

             Quorky: They're not stupid, it was very obvious.

            Nu uh!

            Quorky: Uh huh!

            You're such a baby!

            Quorky: Nu uh!

            Uh huh!

            Quorky: Nu uh!

Uh huh!

            Quorky: Nu uh!

            Uh huh!

            Quorky: Nu uh!

            Uh huh!

            Quorky: Nu uh!

            Uh huh!

            Quorky: Nu uh!

            Ok, I think they're getting a bit bored now.


	28. The dun dun dun Forbidden Floor

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Sorry this chapter's so short, but I wanted these parts of the story to be separate, although I've written and uploaded them at the same time. Yes, I am weird.

Chapter 28

            "She'll be OK. Its just side effects of the 'gunk' she ingested, she'll become the opposite of herself. You didn't eat any, did you?" The nurse asked Nadia.

            "No way!" Nadia looked disgusted. "Um, how long will this last for?" 

            "About a week, if, as you said, she did only ingest a tiny amount." The nurse started packing away her things.

            "Why was Buu carrying that stuff around in the kitchen anyway?" Sai asked.

            "It seems he wasn't very happy with the way the students were treating him. Things are being dealt with and a new lunch server has been organized. Come get me if she takes a turn for the worse." The nurse closed the door behind her.

            "Where's my Goku-kun?" Yoli asked sleepily.

            "Skittles, its Skittles! Or Vegeta, Ve-ge-ta." Nadia looked at her friend.

            "It's no use Nadia. We might aswell just get some sleep." Sai reasoned, climbing into bed.

            "I guess so." Nadia resigned, getting changed into her pyjamas. "'Night."

            "Goodnight." Sai yawned.

            "Mmmm, Goku." Yoli answered.

~*~ 

            "Shhhh!" Yoli hissed.

            "It's only Kakkorrot!" Nadia replied indignantly.

            "Goku, his name is Goku!" Yoli stated, listening attentively to Goku talk about 'Parental Skills'.

            "No, he is a Saiyan. His Saiyan name is Kakkorrot, therefore he is denying his Saiyan heritage and bestowing disgrace upon the Saiyan race by calling himself 'Goku'." Nadia sniffed.

             "Yeah, yeah." Yoli muttered, watching Goku with glazed eyes and all the while taking notes.

            "Since when did you take notes?" Nadia asked, shocked.

            "Why wouldn't I? We were brought to this University to be educated and learn, so shhh!" Yoli turned her attention back to Goku.

            "Pssssst." A voice interrupted Nadia from her thoughts. "Psssst!"

            "Huh? What?" Nadia turned around to see a girl she'd never met before begin to prod her with a ruler.

            "Hi. You're Nadia, right?" The girl whispered.

            "Yeah."

            "I'm J'dee." The girl stretched her hand across the room and smiled as Nadia shook it. "I'm I right in saying that you cleaned up Yamcha's party mess?"

            "Yeah…"

            "Ooooooo!" J'dee squealed, and then quietened down as Goku shot her a look. "Do you have any…you know, souvenirs?"

            "No, just the painful, painful memories." Nadia shuddered. "Nevermind." She said as J'dee got a confused look on her face.

            "Oh. Um…could you get me any?" J'dee looked hopeful.

            "No…actually, yeah. If you come with me that is." Nadia grinned.

            "Where?" J'dee whispered, getting another dirty look from Goku.

            "The 'Forbidden Floor'"


	29. Yamcha's' Coat

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Wow, 329 reviews! Thankies sooo much!

Quorky: You sound so desperate, ya know that?

Oh be quiet monkey boy, you're just jealous!

Crow Mirror: Which DragonBall Z character is your favourite? I'll try putting you in the next chapter, but I need to know!

Chapter 29

  Nadia sighed as she followed a crowd of students down the corridor. It had been a long day. Yoli hadn't sat at the 'Vegeta table' for lunch, she'd opted for the 'Goku table' and Nadia wasn't very happy about that. Nor was she happy that she'd just spent the last ten minutes waiting outside Yoli's last subject room to be notified that Yoli had left at least a quarter of an hour ago, notified by a 'worthless piece of Kakkorrot scum' as Nadia had put it. No, Nadia wasn't happy at all.       

            "And just where the hell did you run off…oh my Kami." Nadia breathed. (A/N: I bet Dende's not too happy with these students!)

            "Oh, hey Nadia!" Yoli looked up from where she was tacking something onto the wall.

            "What the hell did you do to Veggie-Chan? Where is he?" Nadia slammed the door behind her and took a couple of small steps into the room.

            "Oh, I thought we'd have a change. All those smirks were depressing." Yoli said cheerfully, smoothing down a poster of Goku over Nadia's bed.

            "But…but…his smirk is one of his sexiest features!" Nadia said, still in shock.

            "And all that spandex was making me rather uncomfortable. It's a bit strange seeing him in such revealing clothes when we all know he's extremely frigid." Yoli said whilst admiring her handy-work.

            "What the fuck did you just say?" Nadia demanded, looking around for any sign of a murder weapon.

            "You didn't know? Oh yes, terribly frigid Vegeta is. Shi – I mean, ow!" Yoli grunted as Nadia hit her over the head with an empty suitcase, the only thing that looked promising on the girls' floor.

            "I'll accept the fact that you're spreading these terrible lies," Nadia emphasised the word 'lies', "because of the side effects and only because of the side effects. I expect you to pin all, I mean all, my Vegeta stuff back up, otherwise…I won't let you see Kakkorrot tonight." Nadia smirked.

            "Yeah right. Pin up all your stuff? Do you know how much you have? Woah, hold up there. Meet Goku, as in talk to him, one to one?" Yoli suddenly sported gold stars in her eyes.

            "Yep, tonight at 7:45pm." 

            "Whats tonight at 7:45pm?" Sai asked, walking into the dorm.

            "Here's the plan." Nadia began whispering furiously as Sai and Yoli crowded round.

~*~ (7:52pm)

            "Where is she?" Nadia looked at her watch impatiently.

            "Sorry I'm late!" J'dee gasped, stumbling down the corridor.

            "Shhh!" Yoli muttered sourly. She didn't like the idea of going onto the 'Forbidden Floor' and breaking the rules. (A/N: Oh yes, her personality has swapped over!)

             "OK, everyone ready?" Nadia asked. "Lets go." She said, pulling down her black balaclava, as did the others. Each girl was kitted in black jogging bottoms, or jeans in Nadia's case, a black jumper, black shoes and black gloves. J'dee had decided to sport some black sunglasses to give her that 'FBI-I'm-gonna-kick-your-ass kinda feel'.

            "These stairs creak!" Sai said, stating the obvious as the four girls ascended the forbidden staircase. They looked both ways, as a cautious child would at a busy road. Noticing two Cell Juniors, Nadia reached into her backpack and produced a piece of chicken smothered in 'Nadia's Special Sauce', which was sleeping pills crushed into some pink gunk scraped off of Yoli's arm. She tossed it towards the Cell Juniors, who sniffed it cautiously before ripping it to shreds. Within seconds they were safely asleep and the four girls carried on their journey, turning left into a shorter corridor.

            "I know! We so don't get paid enough for this." Bulma's high-pitched voice rang in the silence as she and Chi Chi emerged from an unrecognisable room. The four girls instantly hid behind a wall until Bulma and Chi Chi were out of sight.

             "Is that the staff room?" Nadia asked Yoli.

            "What?" Yoli asked, not hearing the faint whisper.

            "I said…" Nadia shut up when her voice pierced the silence. "I said…is that the staff room?" She asked much quieter this time.

            "I dunno, I think it's the next door down." 

            "Only one way to find out." Sai said, pushing open the door, the other three girls not close behind her. "I don't think it's the staff room, but damn it's better." Sai said appreciatively about the view that greeted them.

            "Oh my virgin eyes!" Yoli covered her eyes instantly.

            "I know I'm a Yamcha fan and all, but damn he looks good in water!" J'dee stated.

            "As much as I agree with you, he's my Veggie-Chan's son and I find that repulsive." Nadia tried her best to look disgusted as she saw Mirai Trunks taking a shower. Of course there was too much steam to see anything except his purple hair, but that didn't stop their ecchi minds working over time.

            "Ok, ok. This obviously isn't the staff room, so lets go, you hentai's." Yoli muttered, her eyes still closed. Nadia followed, as did J'dee, albeit reluctantly.

            "Damn girl, you're definitely ill." Nadia commented. "Sai. Sai? Come on!" Nadia pulled Sai away from the shower room.

            "But it was just getting good!" Sai argued.

            "We have a mission to do here." Yoli said.

            "Yeah, to find something belonging to that oh-so-fine Yamcha!" J'dee grinned.

            "And to meet Goku-kun, the strongest warrior in the Universe." Yoli added, ignoring the low growl coming from Nadia.

            "Why are you here, Nadia?" Sai asked her friend, looking around for signs of movement.

            "Me? Oh, uh, nothing really, I mean, there's no reason." Nadia said hurriedly and unconvincingly.

            "OK, if you say so." Sai looked at Nadia sceptically.

            "Here, that's the one, I'm sure of it!" Yoli pointed to the door they'd arrived at.

            "You're sure this time?" J'dee asked.

            "Uh huh!" Yoli said, enthusiastic about the chance to meet her new idol.

            "Alright then, Sai, you know what to do." Nadia ushered the other two girls into hiding at Sai's nod of agreement. "One…two…three…"

            "WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! OH WOE IS ME! WOE IS ME!" Sai screamed at the top of her lungs. The door swung open and Piccolo, Yamcha, Goku and Mr Popo came running out to see what was the problem.

            "What is that awful noise?" Piccolo demanded gruffly.

            "It seems it would be coming from that girl." Mr Popo pointed out.

            "Right, now!" Nadia hissed, as the three girls ran into the opened staff room when the faculty's backs were turned.

            "Vegeta's there!" J'dee stated as the girls quickly crouched behind a sofa upon seeing the Saiyan Prince get a drink of water from the refrigerator.

            "Well duh." Nadia muttered. "Why didn't he go see what the noise was?" 

            "Maybe he was too thirsty." Yoli helpfully pointed out.

            "Wow, this place sure is spiffy. Spiffier than our dorms, anyway." J'dee whispered.

            "Well, how are we gonna get past him?" Nadia asked exasperatedly.

            "Ooooo, is that Yamcha's jacket?" J'dee asked excitedly.

            "Where?"

            "Over there, slung over that arm chair!" J'dee pointed.

            "Yeah, probably." Yoli shrugged.

            "Hmm, now all we need to do is sneak past Vegeta, grab the coat and make it out of here so no one sees us. Well I'm feeling confident." J'dee rubbed her hands together.

            "Oh yeah, piece of piss." Nadia muttered sourly.

            "Nadia! Language!" Yoli said disgustedly.

            "Come again?" Nadia asked, confused.

            "Yes, I do have Saiyan hearing. You might aswell stand up and talk a bit louder, baka's." Vegeta's highly amused voice called.

            "Fucking hell." Nadia cursed, standing up. "Hey there Vegeta."

            "What are you doing here? I assume you know this area is out of bounds."

            "I thought you'd know, what with your 'Saiyan hearing' and all." Nadia muttered.

            "Why, aren't you amusing today? Why the hell would you want that baka's jacket?" Vegeta asked, a look of disgust crossing his features.

            "Psssh, I'd rather have your jacket than his. Then again, you don't wear jackets all that often." Nadia said. "She wants it." Nadia pointed to J'dee.

            "Well, I'll say one thing for you – you do have good taste." Vegeta smirked. "Fine, take the jacket."

            "Excuse me? I must've fallen asleep or something cos I could've sworn you said 'Fine, take the jacket'" Nadia rubbed her ears.

            "I did." Vegeta stated.

            "Don't have to tell me twice!" J'dee grinned happily, making a dive for the jacket and happily putting it on. "Mmmm, it even smells like him!" J'dee announced, taking a sniff.

            "Wow! Mirai Trunks!" Sai's high-pitched voice rang around the staff room.

            "Looks like your little friend's tears have dried up. I'd go if I was you." Vegeta flicked his hand dismissively.

            "Uh…OK." Nadia said, confused.

            "What about Goku-kun?" Yoli asked.

            "'Goku-kun'?" Vegeta demanded.

            "Yeah, uh, she's kinda got a thing for Kakkorrot now." Nadia explained.

            "Well, I've never heard of 'working your way down'." Vegeta smirked at Yoli, who pulled a face.

            "C'mon, c'mon!" J'dee cried impatiently. The three girls made their way over to the door, where they saw half of the faculty crowding round Sai. They ran down the hall, and once Sai had spotted them she abruptly stopped crying.

            "Heehee, dunno what came over me. Hormones or something." Sai grinned sheepishly. "Gotta go." She said quickly, bolting after her friends.

            "What was all that about?" A confused Goku asked.

            "I have no idea. But one of them girls looked to be wearing my jacket." Mr Popo said, puzzled.

            "What happened?" Yamcha asked Vegeta, who was standing next to the doorframe.

            "Don't ask me, baka. Oh, I found this." Vegeta said, throwing Yamcha his jacket – identical to the one J'dee was wearing. "It somehow fell behind the fridge." Vegeta smirked.


	30. Master Roshi Little Black Box EW!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Oooooooooo, chapter 30! 

Chapter 30

            "Hey, uh, is Yoli here?" A tall girl with dark hair and green eyes asked Nadia. A slightly shorter girl with similar dark hair and blue eyes accompanied her. It was early Thursday morning.

            "Uh…sure. Yoli?" Nadia called to her friend.

            "Yeah? Chase, Bri, hey!" Yoli greeted her friends. "Come in. This is Nadia."

            "Oh, she's the aggressive, slightly insane Vegeta fanatic then?" The girl with blue eyes, Bri, said.

            "Excuse me?" Nadia asked.

            "You should come over to our side, ya know. Yoli reformed, I'm sure you can." The other girl, Chase, said sympathetically.

            "I don't want to be reformed into some happy-go-lucky Kakkorrot-obsessed freak, thanks very much. I'm happy with Vegeta and his spandex." Nadia replied haughtily, heading towards the bathroom.

            "I see what you mean about the aggressiveness." Bri whispered to Yoli. "Its common in most Vegetarians."

            "Vegetarians?" Yoli asked, confused.

            "Yeah, you know, 'Vegeta obsessors'." Chase said.

            "Yeah, the Vegeta ones are 'Vegetarians', Goku ones are known as 'Gokuns', Trunks ones are known as 'Trunkettes', Piccolo's are 'Pico's' and Gohan ones are 'Gohanny's'. There's countless others." Bri finished.

            "Why is that little box Roshi gave us making whirring sounds?" Nadia demanded, coming out of the bathroom.

            "Dunno." Yoli shrugged.

            "Show us." Chase asked, getting up.

            "Look. It's making weird noises. Roshi told us to position it so it's a good angle of the shower…ew!" Nadia screamed.

            "What?" Yoli, Bri and Chase asked.

            "Roshi plus black box making whirring noises positioned above shower equals perverted Roshi getting off on students in the goddamn shower!" Nadia shrieked in revulsion.

            "Ew, ew, ew! Gross!" Yoli groaned, grabbing the box and throwing it in the bin.

            "So, like, Roshi's seen you two naked?" Chase and Bri asked.

            "I am so glad I don't have class with that pervert!" J'dee gagged, hugging 'Yamcha's' jacket close to her body. 

            "Kami this is sick." Yoli's face had taken on a slight green tinge to it.

            "We've got to tell someone!" Nadia insisted, trying to block out the thought of Roshi watching these cameras.

            "Like who? This is so embarrassing!" Yoli said.

            "Well, we can't just let girls carry on taking showers whilst Roshi is watching them!" Nadia stated.

            "We can't?" Yoli asked.

            "Of course we can't! I cannot believe you just said that!" Nadia shrieked.

            "Hey, he can't see me no more so I'm not right bothered." Yoli huffed.

            "Well, I'm reporting this whether you guys are helping me or not." Nadia said, making her way to the door. "Fine!" She slammed the door shut when no one made a move to follow her, save J'dee.

            "Whats her problem?" Chase asked dryly.

~*~

            "I am so sick of this new Yoli! She's so bloody annoying!" Nadia moaned to J'dee as they made their way towards the Head teacher's Office. As it was class time, no visible staff was around.

            "Well, from what I heard she was pretty annoying before. Have you ever seen the head teacher?" J'dee asked Nadia as they approached the door.

            "Now that I come to think of it…no." Nadia furrowed her brow. "Strange, I've never actually heard anything about this head teacher either."

            "Me too. Isn't that a little bit strange?" J'dee asked, looking confused.

            "J'dee, we're in a University for writers of DragonBall Z fiction where we get taught by the characters themselves. My best friend has been turned the opposite of herself by a pink lunch-thing called Buu, on my first day I was in trouble with Piccolo because I was trashing a Kakkorrot fan's dorm, I made Vegeta violently ill by serving him something that has no name, I bribed Trunks and Goten into taking nude pictures and a VHS of his dad in the shower and I had to take the Saiyan Prince himself home with me, where he played football, my brother touched his arse, he read some him/Kakkorrot yaoi and threatened to kill the writer, and you think that a head teacher we haven't met is strange?" Nadia asked, gasping for breath after her long speech.

            "Uh…good point. Woah, you have naked pics of Vegeta? Your brother's gay? Your brother got to touch his ass? Vegeta can play football? You trashed a Goku's fan room?" J'dee let out a string of questions.

            "I'll tell you about it later. Knock on the door then!" Nadia instructed her friend.

            "OK…wait, why don't you?" J'dee demanded.

            "Hey, you never know who could be behind it!" Nadia said defensively.

            "Exactly, you knock!"

            "No, you!"

            "Do I look stupid?"

            "Well…"

            "Shut up! You knock, Nadia! It was your idea!" J'dee said exasperatedly.

            "But you were dumb enough to come with me!" Nadia wailed.

            "Nadia!"

            "Fine, fine. I am doing this for all the naked students Roshi pervs on, I am doing this for all the naked students Roshi pervs on." Nadia muttered over and over to herself before knocking on the door. "What a shame, no one home." Nadia said quickly, turning away.

            "Uh…Nadia…" J'dee said, looking up at the figure that now loomed in the doorway.   

A/N2: MUWHAHAHAHAHA! Was that a cliffie or was that a cliffie?

            Quorky: That was plain evilness.

            MUWHAHAHAHA*cough*HAHAHAHA!

            Quorky: What did your mom say about those evil cackles? I'll tell you! She said; 'Don't cackle evilly, it doesn't do your throat any good!'

            Thanks Quorky for ruining my moment!

'Gohannies' is Go-hanny's, as in hunny's, just replacing the u with an a.

'Pico's' is pronounced 'Peek-o's'

'Gokuns' is pronounced as it's spelt.

'Trunkettes' is pronounced as it's spelt.

'Vegetarians' is pronounced Vegeta's name, then 'arians' added on the end.


	31. The Torture Is Now Over

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey guys. This will be my last update for a week. Sorry, but its out of my hands, personal reasons.

Chapter 31

            "You're the head master, uh, mistress?" J'dee asked in disbelief.

            "Huh? Oh, no. I'm Cassandra!" A girl with blonde, curly hair and bluey-green eyes behind glasses said.

            "Uh…isn't this the Head master's office?" Nadia asked Cassandra.

            "Uh huh! But, well, I was in trouble." Cassandra smiled.

            "Trouble? This is the fifth time today you've been in 'trouble', Cassandra!" A voice boomed from the office.

            "Oh my God! I didn't know he worked here!" J'dee looked at Nadia.

            "Neither did I. I hope he's not in a 'I'm going to destroy the Earth' mode." Nadia said.

            "Well, what do you want?" The android approached the door menacingly, shooing Cassandra away, who seemed to have two love hearts where her pupils should be.

            "I gotta go anyway, find Cell. Cricket man is going down!" Cassandra hissed, brandishing a chibi hammer as she ran down the corridor.

            "Uh, Mr Seventeen, sir…" J'dee started.

            "What my friend's trying to say is, Roshi is perving on us with these tacky cameras he gave us. What you gonna do about it?"

            "Hang on, he gave you cameras and you willingly took them?" Seventeen asked sceptically.

            "No! He gave them us as homework!" Nadia replied.

            "And you didn't find the fact he gave you cameras strange?" 

            "Yes, I mean, no! We didn't know they were cameras! He just told us to position them in front of the shower!" Nadia said, her voice raising an octave.

            "And you didn't find that suspicious?" Seventeen asked, narrowing his eyes.

            "Well yes, I mean no, I mean, I don't know! They were just goddamn boxes! Aren't you gonna do something about him?" Nadia demanded.

            "Not if you carry on speaking to me like that." The android said sternly, causing Nadia to shrink back.

            "Whatever." She muttered. "I'm not bothered, let him carry on perving on your students." Nadia said, turning around haughtily.

            "Anything else?" Seventeen asked J'dee, who was still stood there.

            "Can I have your autograph?" She asked, producing a pad and pen.

~*~

            "Woohoo! You're coming out of your 'I love Kakkorrot' phase!" Nadia whooped for joy. It was Friday, and they were in Master Roshi's class. Yoli had been showing signs of 'normality' all day, but now it became crystal clear that the side effects of 'special sauce' were wearing off.

            "Thank god for that! Goku, I mean Kakkorrot, doesn't even wear spandex!" Yoli declared.

            "Vegeta and Goku? What you girls need is a real man!" Master Roshi commented, over-hearing the girls' conversation.

            "Yeah, we do. Whats your point?" Nadia asked bluntly.

            "So harsh! What about you, cupcake? Why don't you plant a wet one on old Roshi?" Master Roshi made kissing noises with his mouth.

            "Yea, 'old' being the operative word here!" Yoli said, disgust showing on her face. "Take a hike, pervert." 

            "Hey, what are you doing here?" Roshi's gaze went past the girls, and they turned around to see whom he was directing his question to.

            "Watching an old man getting blown off." The boy stated.

            "Why you little…"

            "ROSHI! You dirty old pervert!" A familiar, high-pitched voice shrieked.

            "Bulma, hi!" Master Roshi got a rather shift look on his face.

            "Where are my one hundred cameras you borrowed?" Bulma demanded.

            "In students dorms, I believe." Seventeen stepped into the room casually.

            "Oh my God!" One girl shrieked and fell over. She was wearing an 'I Luv 17' T-shirt.

            "If only he was Eighteen." The boy Roshi was talking to earlier said.

            "So, why are you here? Do you, ya know, swing 'that' way?" Yoli asked pointedly.

            "Hell no!" The boy said, his brown eyes flashing defensively. "I got put into here cos this was the only spare place. I'm Joseph, by the way."

            "Nadia." Nadia shook the boy's outstretched hand.

            "Yeah, I'm Yoli. I'm a 'Spandex-covered-Vegeta' freak." Yoli grinned at Joseph, who looked slightly scared.

            "Don't worry, she doesn't bite. Unless you're wearing spandex that is." Nadia explained.

            "I'll remember that in future." Joseph said, after checking he wasn't actually wearing spandex.

            "This class is suspended until furthur notice, Roshi." Seventeen hissed to Master Roshi.

            "Fine, just let me get my magazines."

            "Hurry up and get out!" Bulma shrieked.

            "Can you take this class, Bulma?" Seventeen asked Bulma.

            "Sorry, I've got to wash Vegeta's back…uh, I mean…bye!" Bulma rushed out of the door as various students gave Bulma evil glares, including Nadia and Yoli.

            "Yes! Seventeen is teaching us!" The girl with the T-shirt said.

            "Wait a minute, isn't that Cassandra?" Nadia asked out loud as she heard the girl shriek.

            "Cassandra?" Joseph and Yoli asked in confusion.

            "This girl I met. Oi! Cassandra! Yoohoo! Hi!" Nadia called across to Cassandra, who mouthed a 'hey' in response.

            "I take it she's a Seventeen freak?" Joseph asked.

            "Looks like it." Yoli muttered. "Why did they choose all us die-hard fans? What about the people who aren't as crazy as us?"

            "I don't think that the people less crazy than us write strange fan fiction involving themselves, Eighteen, some scary cheese and a sponge." Joseph voiced.

            "Hey, I like the sound of you." Yoli grinned.

A/N2: Eeeeeeeeeeeeep! Sorry it's so short!

            Quorky: So you should be!

            Well excuse me, but I have a lot of stuff on!

            Quorky: So do the people who read this, but they still review!

            Yeah, yeah, I apologised, didn't I?

            Quorky: Yes, a very shitty apology, but an apology is an apology.

            Exactly! Hey, it wasn't THAT crappy!   


	32. Woo! Ffnet is back up! dances

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Thanks to Jeril for help with the Roshi punishment! She's the perfect cure for writer's block! 

Chapter 32

            "And he didn't, ya know, blast you or anything?" Joseph asked, a little surprised. He, Nadia and Yoli were queuing for lunch. It'd been over a month since Yoli's 'transformation', and fortunately (or unfortunately, whichever way you look at it) for Nadia, she was her old self again. 

            "Nope." Yoli stated proudly. She'd just finished explaining the different escapades she and Nadia had had with 'Skittles'.

            "Wow, amazing." Joseph muttered, rubbing the scar that ran from his eye to the other side of his nose.

            "That I am, Joe my man…ooooo, pie!" Yoli squealed, seeing the various flavours of pie stacked up.

            "Hey, I wonder who they got for full-time dinner service? I'm getting pissed off with Oolong peering down my tops whenever he serves me gravy." Nadia shuddered at the awful memories.

            "Hello you pretty girls! And how may I help you?" Master Roshi's yellow-tooth lined grin came into view, and there was the pervert himself, kitted up in a clinically white apron, hair net and pink tennis shoes.

            "And it gets worse…" Joe muttered.

            "Says you, and you're not a girl!" Yoli shook her head.

            "Hey, I think Roshi swings both ways, if you know what I mean. He's given me some pretty creepy glances, anyway." Joe shuddered, walked past Roshi without so much as a glance, picked up a slice of pie and made his way to the Vegeta table.

            "Yo, Roshi!" Yoli greeted cheerfully.

            "No, it's you! Eep! It's both of you!" Master Roshi made a cross sign with his fingers.

            "You're not still sore about the camera thing, are you?" Nadia sighed, remembering Roshi's punishment.

            "Hey! I was locked in a room for two weeks, with only bread and water, no magazines and they brought in some Amazon-type women! I do not find aggressiveness sexy! They weren't gentle at all." Roshi sniffed, grimacing as he remembered the punishment Seventeen had handed out to him. "And Cell wasn't much help either. Just rocked back and forth muttering your name!" Roshi glared at Yoli who grinned back.

            "That'll teach ya, dirty old man." Nadia shook her head, grabbed a tuna sandwich and followed Joe to the table.

            "Dirty? Me? If I'm dirty then there is no word to describe those women and what they did to me!" Roshi wailed after Nadia, causing the students to turn and stare.

            "Heehee. Crazy." Nadia explained, twisting her finger into the side of her head.

            Where's Yoli?" Joe asked with a mouthful of pie, once Nadia had sat down.

            "Dunno." Nadia shrugged, taking a bite of her tuna fish sandwich.

            "Roshi got dirty in the Amazon?" A confused looking girl on the Vegeta table asked out loud.

            "Uh…no. It would seem he doesn't like to be dominated." Nadia shuddered, an evil mental image entering her head.

            "Go figure." The girl muttered, then resumed to eating her lunch.

            "God, where is that girl?" Nadia finished off her sandwich, and began searching the room for Yoli.

            "Maybe she decided she really did like Kakkorrot, after all." Joe joked.

            "God, I hope not. Joe, that's not even funny." Nadia said, dreading that Joe was right.

            "I'm sure she hasn't." Joe reassured Nadia, but not looking too confident.

            "C'mon." Nadia dragged Joe up, ignoring his protests of 'Hey, I haven't finished my pie! Mmmm, that pie is good, I can still taste…OW!'

            "Yeah! Proper videos! Yep, and he is totally naked, in the shower!" Nadia heard a girl hiss to her friend excitedly.

            "Who're they talking about…ow, Nadia? Nadia, I would like some blood to get to my hand!" Joe wrenched his wrist free from Nadia's grip.

            "Oh God, I hope she hasn't done anything stupid." Nadia groaned, breaking into a run, with Joe following close behind.

~*~

            "Catch Skittles…uh, I mean Vegeta, in the shower! Perfect angles, perfect sound, although I don't think people will be buying it at £25.99, yes, only £25.99, to listen to the peaceful running of the shower!" Yoli's high-pitched voice boomed around the bottom of the staircases, where she was situated with a fold-up table and piles that were metres high of videotapes.

            "Fuck!" Nadia cursed.

            "What is? Oh my God! Does that sign have Vegeta on it, uh…um…" Joe stammered, averting his glance.

            "Yes, that is a poster reading 'Vegeta-camera, Naked, Wet And Royalty! Only £25.99' with a doctored picture of Vegeta in stiletto's and nothing else sat on my computer chair." Nadia groaned inaudibly, smacking her forehead. 

            "Uh…Nadia…uh…hi?" Yoli stuttered.

            "I'll fucking 'hi' you in a minute! What did I say? 'No copies of the tape', what did you do, SELL copies of the tape!" Nadia roared, stomping up to the table.

            "Ooooooo! Naked Vegeta!" Two girls rushed forward, threw money at Yoli and ran off towards their dorms with their new purchase.

            "Uh…guys, can you cover him up?" Joe pleaded, his eyes covered with his hands.

            "Cover up that God? That'd be a crime!" Yoli stated indignantly. "Uh…sure." Yoli hurriedly added, getting a cold stare from Nadia.

            "C'mon now, we better move this stuff before Vegeta sees it. He has a stick up his ass on a daily basis, he does not need to see this!" Nadia laughed, grabbing some T-shirts that read 'I've Seen My Favourite Prince In The Shower' and 'Veggie; Best Seen Wet'.

            "See what?" A familiar voice boomed.

            "Uh, guys. I know I have my eyes closed and all, but I'm guessing that's the star of Yoli's show?" 

A/N2: Tsk, tsk. Yoli really is perverted!

            Quorky: Don't act like you wouldn't do it!

            Oh shut up! Sorry I haven't updated for…well, time!

            Quorky: Go on, tell them why. Fine, I will. She was at a Wheatus gig at the weekend. Having fun rather than working!

            Hey, it was good! I got to meet all the members at the Sound Check and got a funky sticker saying 'Wheatus Guest'. How cool?

            Quorky: Indeed. 

            Are you jealous cos I didn't take you?

            Quorky: Monkey's don't get jealous.

            Ha! That's just funny! What about that time I ate the last banana? Or when I got my cat?

            Quorky: I'm not jealous! Psssh, why'd I be jealous of YOU?

            Fair enough.


	33. Quorky: Toasted Bananas Are Yummy

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Here's Chapter 33. YAY! FF.net is baaaaaaack *dances* Thanks for all tha luvverly reviews. They're…uh…luvverly.

        Quorky: As always, excellent word power. And why's everyone beating me up in ya reviews(?), goddamnit!

         Cos they wuv me ^_^

            "Uh…Skittles. Hey!" Yoli stuttered, quickly putting her arm around Vegeta and directing him away from the table.

            "What did I say about touching me?" Vegeta demanded, smirking when Yoli removed her arm and closed her eyes tightly in preparation for the Prince's reaction.

            "Uh…Vegeta, it's not what you think…" Nadia trailed off.

            "Oh really? I thought you had T-shirts with me naked and disgraceful captions, so tell me, what is it?" Vegeta demanded, his voice cracking slightly.

            "Well, it is T-shirts with you naked. And stationary, posters and videotapes…OW!" Yoli shouted as both Joe and Nadia kicked her.

            "What?!" Vegeta demanded. "I knew this obsession with me was unhealthy! I knew the boy was acting suspicious with that video camera and Kakkorrot's spawn helping him! I am so foolish!" Vegeta ranted, creating a powerful ki blast into the palms of his hands.

            "Uh…Vegeta, sir. Can I just remind you I haven't seen you naked therefore there is no need to disembowel me?" Joe stuttered. "Not that I wouldn't want to see you naked." He added without thinking, as the vein in Vegeta's forehead grew larger. "I didn't mean it like that. Noooooo! I'm too young to die! I haven't eaten my weight in jelly, stalked my favourite band or jumped from Tesco's rooftop naked!" 

            "Hey, that sounds fun!" Yoli said, seemingly oblivious to Vegeta's progressively growing ki ball.

            "Hey! Vegeta, stop!"

            "Kakkorrot? What do you want?" Vegeta demanded, not taking his gaze off of the now massive ball in his hands.

            "Don't do anything stupid!" Goku called from the top of the stairs.

            "Don't worry, that's your style." Vegeta smirked as the ki ball was ready, and got ready to flick it towards Joe, Nadia and Yoli. "What the…damnit, Kakkorrot!" Vegeta cursed as Goku deflected the ki ball.

            "Huh? This is Hell?" Yoli asked. "Fuck no! This is Heaven!" Yoli shrieked as she saw Vegeta. "Wow, I thought I'd go to Hell."

            "If this is Heaven, then where is my six half-naked women that should be fanning me by now?" Joe demanded feeling gypped.

            "You two are dumbass'. Obviously, um…Kakkorrotsavedus." Nadia hurriedly added the last bit.

            "Vegeta, you know the rules! No blowing up students!" Goku called, descending the stairs.

            "The Prince of all Saiya-jins does not obey rules set out by some android!" Vegeta snarled.

            "Vegeta, I don't want to, but I'll have to restrain you." Goku warned.

            "That sounds like a challenge! Ha, I have a better idea. We will have a challenge, if you win, I will leave these brats." Vegeta paused as Nadia, Joe and Yoli breathed a sigh of relief. "But, if I win, I can blast them back to their dimension!"

            "What?" Nadia demanded.

            "Psssh, Kakkorrot won't agree to that. He's too soft!" Yoli scoffed.

            "Deal." Goku agreed.

            "What?" Nadia, Joe and Yoli said in unison.

            "Good." Vegeta smirked. "Outside, on the lawn. Me and you will have a football (A/N: Or soccer) match." Vegeta's smirked grew deeper as a look of confusion swept over Goku's features.

~*~  
  


            "So I have to kick that round thing into that netty thing?" Goku asked for the hundredth time. They were outside the University, and quite a crowd had gathered, Krillin, Piccolo, Gohan, Mirai Trunks, Bulma, Chibi Goten and Chibi Trunks were amongst them.

            "You have to kick the ball into the goal, yes. Vegeta's goal, that is." Nadia explained.

            "Which is Vegeta's goal, again? You OK?" Goku asked as Nadia fell over 'anime-style'.

            "I hope you're ready to lose, Kakkorrot!" Vegeta bragged, walking over to Goku and Nadia.

            "No way, Vegeta!" Goku grinned. 

            "Choose teams, six-a-side." Vegeta said, looking somewhat pleased with his new found knowledge. "I choose her."

            "Woooo! I'm on Veggie-uh-ta's team!" Nadia quickly caught her mistake, and ran to the 'blue' side.

            "Right, I choose Gohan." Goku grinned as his son ran up and put on a red 'bib'.

            "Thanks dad." Gohan smiled back.

            "Namek." Vegeta said, smirking as Piccolo growled and walked towards the rest of the 'blue' team.

            "I am not wearing one of those ridiculous-looking things!" Piccolo insisted.

            "They're called 'bibs', and you reckon they're silly? Have you seen yourself lately?" Nadia asked indignantly.

            "Yes, Namek. It is hard to not kill her, but try to wait until I've won this game." Vegeta hissed, holding Piccolo back.

            "Krillin!" Goku chose his best-friend, who also ran up and took a red bib.

            "You." Vegeta pointed at Joe, who dutifully brushed off his pants and put on a blue bib.

            "Um…um…" Goku looked at the line of people; Chibi Trunks and Goten, Yoli, Bulma and Mirai Trunks.          

            "Pick me! Pick me!" Yoli hopped around.

            "Um…you." Goku nodded towards Yoli who let out a small 'yes' and hurriedly put on a red bib.

            "Future brat." Vegeta said, looking bored as Mirai Trunks stepped up.

            "Hey, monkey boy! What about me? I'm your fucking wife!" Bulma shrieked.

            "You're also a weakling that has no knowledge of this sport. I do want to win this game, not lose you know." Vegeta smirked as Bulma's face changed shade.

            "Uh…OK, Bulma. I choose you." Goku managed to get out, as Bulma was choking him.

            "Ha, in your face Mr High And Mighty!" Bulma stuck out her tongue. "These bibs aren't very flattering."            

            "Thanks, you just made it easier for me to win." Vegeta smirked. "Brat." 

            "Woohoo!" Chibi Trunks called, putting on an over-sized bib.

            "Ok Goten, you're with me." Goku called.

            "Yay!" Goten cheered, scampering over to the red team.

A/N2: LMAO! Vegeta saying 'lawn'? Now that is too funny!

            Quorky: You're sense of humour is quite…how do I put this(?)…unique.

            Awww! Thanks Quork-meister! *Hugglez tight*

            Quorky: Can't…breathe…


	34. Let The Game Begin!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Woooo! Ff.net is back up…again! Here's Chapter 34! Oh, and whoever asked to be in the fic, I'm sorry but there are just no new characters coming into play at the moment. Deepest apologies.

            "Eeep! Help me!" Bulma shrieked, ducking as the ball sailed past her and into the net. Goku didn't do a great job of choosing positions. "Right, Miss Goodyear, extra homework for you!" 

            "Eh? That's not fair! What the hell are you laughing at Veggie? It'll just be an essay on what a baka you are. Yeah, she tells us alllll your secrets!" Nadia smirked.

            "Yeah, stud-muffin." Yoli winked at Vegeta, running back to her position.

            "Onna!" Vegeta screeched at Bulma.

            "Ow! Watch the antennae!" Piccolo shouted, as Bulma kicked the ball pretty hard, causing it to bounce off of the Namek's head and back towards her.

            "Yay! I caught it!" Yoli cried, as she grabbed the ball with her hands.

            "Yoli, you thick shit, you can't touch the ball with your hands!" Joe shouted from defence, edging away from Piccolo, who was giving him evil glares.

            "Really? Wow, what's this world coming to?" Yoli asked, genuinely surprised.

            "Move it, Vegetable head, I'm taking the penalty." Nadia shoved Vegeta, which didn't faze him.

            "Hmph. Out of my way, Shrimp." Vegeta growled, flinging Nadia across the pitch with a flick of his wrist. All the players got behind the ball as Vegeta got ready to take a run up and kick it into the net.

            "Holy shit! A spider!" Nadia screamed, smirking as Vegeta yelped, and ran to the other end of the pitch.

            "Wooo! And Goodyear hits it in the back of the net as the crowd goes wild!" Nadia shouted as she took advantage of Vegeta's arachnophobia, and sailed the ball into the net.

            "Wow, you're pretty good at this to say you're so crap at Fusion…nevermind." Chibi Trunks grinned, as Nadia growled.

            "You stupid ikeike, there was no spider, was there?" Vegeta demanded, approaching Nadia menacingly.

             "Really? Must've been a blade of grass then." Nadia smirked.

            "Why you little…"

            "What ya gonna do Veggie? Beat me up? Come on then!" Nadia egged the Prince on.

            "With pleasure."

            "GOAL!!" Gohan shouted, as the ball hit the back of Vegeta's net.

            "Fuck! See, this is your fault!" Nadia shouted at Vegeta, running back into position, waiting for Mirai Trunks to kick the ball back out.

            "My fault? You said there was a damn spider! You shouldn't joke about those foul creatures!" Vegeta said, looking on the verge of tears.

            "I'm sorry." Nadia muttered, as she got control of the ball. "Baby." She whispered, temporarily forgetting about Saiyan hearing.

            "I am not! They're disgusting!" Vegeta defended himself.

            "Get back here, Cue-ball!" Nadia shouted after Krillen, who had taken the ball from her when she was talking to Vegeta.

            "Yoink." Chibi Trunks muttered, taking the ball from Krillen, sliding through his legs and safely putting it in the back of the net.

            "Are you trying to kill me?" Bulma shrieked, from where she had ducked, a magazine in her hand.

~*~

            "Good game!" Joe called to Nadia.

            "Yep." Nadia grinned triumphantly. They had won, 10-2, thanks to Bulma and her 'broken nails'. The two goals were scored by Gohan, who was the only person able to get past Piccolo.

            "Yes! I am so glad we missed afternoon classes. I wonder what the kids did without Goku and everyone? See, I told you something was going on between Gohan and Piccolo!" Yoli hissed to Nadia.

            "If you say so." Nadia laughed. "Just don't say that within hearing distance of any Gohan fans. They're rather aggressive."

            "Indeed they are. My roomie is a Gohan fan. I made a passing comment about how friendly he and Piccolo are, and she threw what she likes to call here 'faithful spork' at my ass!" Joe muttered, rubbing his backside as if remembering that fateful day.

            "Wow, only a couple of weeks until end of the semester! You guys going home for Christmas?" Yoli inquired.

            "And miss seeing Veggie in his Santa costume? Hell no!" Nadia stated.

            "I doubt it. My mom will probably just send my presents here." Joe muttered.

            "Cool! We'll be together for Xmas!" Yoli grinned, linking up with Joe and Nadia as they made their way back to the dorms.

            "Well, this is my stop. Seeya guys later!" Joe called, as he unhooked from Yoli and disappeared into his dorm.

            "Bye Joe!" Nadia and Yoli called, carrying up along the corridor.

            "Yo." Sai called from the desk, not lifting her head.

            "Hey." Nadia and Yoli said, as Nadia closed the door.

            "Whats that?" Yoli asked, nosily.

            "Huh? Oh this? Some homework Krillen set us last week." Sai rubbed her eyes. "I've just about finished. We had to research other famous people who had short, non-jealous sidekicks as best-friends." 

            "Lucky you." Nadia commented, pulling on her pyjamas and running a brush through her hair.

            "Aren't I just?" Sai chuckled, switching off the lamp as Nadia and Yoli climbed into bed.

            "Night." All three girls called to one another as they drifted into dreamless sleep.

~*~

            "What the fuck?" Nadia shot up in bed.

            "Trrrrrrrrrrunks. 

Your hair is purple and long, 

I love you, so I wrote this song.

            To prove to you my love is true,

            Oh, when you ignore me I feel so blueeeeeee."

            "Shut up!" Nadia called out of her window.

            "Oh, how I hate those other whores,

            Who try to win you over by opening doors.

            Can't you see?

            You're the one for meeeeeee." The voice cracked, when trying to hit a high note.

            "What is that?" Sai demanded, awaking.

            "Some crazy Trunks fan is serenading him!  Guess his window is across from ours." Nadia mumbled sleepily.

            "Trunks' bedroom is across from ours?" Sai asked excitedly.

            "Oh baby,

            Some people reckon I'm crazy.

            But I'm just an obsessed teenage lunatic,

            Trust me, I won't biteeeeeee."

            "That doesn't even rhyme!" Nadia called out of the window, and spotted a silhouette of the girl in a tree.

            "Oi, whore, he's mine!" Sai shouted at the girl.

            "What the fuck is going on? I'm trying to sleep you baka!" A familiar voice came.

            "Huh? Why's Vegeta in Trunks' room?" Sai asked.

            "Don't make me come down…eeeeeee!" Vegeta wailed, as he fell from his window.


	35. Now That Is Useful Information

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey everyone! Thanks for the excellent reviews!

            "Fly, Veggie, fly!" Nadia called to the Saiyan Prince.

            "Shut up, bakayaro. Was it you screeching at the top of your lungs just now?" Vegeta demanded, his eyes rather dull and his hair slightly messier than usual.

            "Huh? Me? No, I'm a one-man woman! Why would I attempt to serenade your son?" Nadia replied indignantly.

            "Was it you?" Vegeta asked, a look of rage directed towards Sai.

            "No! I mean, Trunks is hot and all, but I'd serenade his window, not his dad's!" Sai stated, rather insulted by the prospect of serenading Vegeta's window.

            "What about that crazy, insane…oh." Vegeta said, noticing Yoli snoring.

            "Ok, I'm gonna regret this, but…why are you in Trunksy's room?" Sai asked.

            "Trunksy?" Vegeta wrinkled his nose in disgust. "I sleepwalk so I need to have the room farthest away from the stairs…why are you looking at me like that."  
  


            "No reason, Vegeta." Nadia grinned, thinking of all the wonderful prospects that lay before her now she'd found out that Vegeta's window is across from hers and that he sleepwalks.

            "So…um…just out of curiosity…where is Trunks' room?" Sai asked, sliding in her question carefully and inconspicuously.

            "Do I look stupid to you, brat? I am the Saiya-jin Prince and I will not have you sneaking around at all hours perving on my son! Students these days get more and more like Roshi…" Vegeta hissed, shaking his head.

            "Wha…? Excuse me, but have I even tried to spy on you?" Nadia demanded.

            "Yes."

            "Huh? When?"

            "When you videotaped me in the shower, kusottare." Vegeta growled, remembering Yoli selling the videotapes to the University.        

            "Oh, hey Skittles. Miss me already?" Yoli asked sleepily, rubbing her eyes.

            "Why would I miss you, bakana onna?" Vegeta shot back.

            "Isn't it strange, as Dragon Ball Z characters are Japanese, shouldn't they speak Japanese. But they speak English with certain words or phrases in Japanese to confuse everyone. Peculiar." Sai mused as she climbed back into bed.

            "Ah well, fics don't have to make much sense. Neither do essays if you put it at the bottom of the pile 'cos then Bulma gets bored after the first ten and just grades the rest between A-C, by singing a little rhyme. The bottom paper always get marked A* for fun." Yoli informed the room.

            "Well, how's that gonna work now if we all try and put our essay at the bottom?" Nadia asked, confused.

            "Well you don't, duh! I get all the A*'s and you just hope Bulma lands on an A note when grading your paper!" Yoli stuck her tongue out at Nadia.

            "She's moving!" Vegeta hissed, referring to the girl who'd been serenading him.

            "Run, little girl, run!" Yoli screamed.

            "Don't bother, bitch! No one serenades my Trunksy and gets away with it!" Sai joined in.

            "Bye Veggie!" Nadia grinned, falling back onto her pillow. "Man, this University rocks!" She stated before drifting off to sleep, dreaming about sleepwalking Vegeta's.

~*~

            "So I go, 'Nu uh, I like Skittles more' and she goes, 'Nu uh, I like Cadbury's Marble more'…"

            "Cadbury's Marble?" Joe and Nadia asked simultaneously.

            "Huh? Oh yeah, her nickname for Vegeta, he his quite popular amongst candy. Anyways, I go 'No bloody way! I totally obsess over him!' and she's all 'I don't think so. He's the one covered all over my books and folders' and I say 'So what? That's nothing! I've sold VHS' of him naked, in the shower!' and she goes 'I know, I bought five copies. He's so hott!' and I'm all 'Hey bitch, he's mine!' and she's like 'Ha! What ya gonna do?' and I'm all 'This' and I punched her! Which is why I've got a detention with Piccolo later today. Wanna join me?" Yoli asked, out of breath after her long speech.

            "Um…sure?" Joe said, confused.

            "I guess so…" Nadia said, just going along with Joe.

            "Great! Now all you have to do is get into trouble! Great!" Yoli rubbed her hands together.

~*~

            "But I don't want to do it!" Joe whined.

            "Tough! You said you'd join me in detention!" Yoli hissed, pushing Joe through the classroom door.

            "Oh, hi Joseph. You forget something?" Chi Chi asked. She was in one of her nice moods…for once.

            "Um…no. I mean, yes. I just wanted to tell you something." Joe stammered, fidgeting with the sleeve of his jumper.

            "Yes?"

            "Uh…you have a really fat…uh…ass. I mean, it puts me off my work. I lose concentration 'cos it's so bloody big and I'll even pay for you to have liposuction or something because I don't mind as long as you…" Joe trailed off as Chi Chi's face turned colour. "Woah, didn't even know that colour existed!" Joe commented on Chi Chi's face.

            "Nande kuso? You stupid little kono yaro! How dare you speak to me like that?" Chi Chi demanded, grabbing the closest thing to her- the box of frying pans.

            "Fuck." Joe hissed as the box came flying towards his face.

~*~

            "Ok, Nadia. It's not that hard, just do it." Yoli egged Nadia on.

            "That's what you said about Joe! Look at him!" Nadia whined, pointing to Joe.

            "It didn't hurt…much." Joe managed to mumble out of his now huge lip. His eyes were starting to bruise and he had a bright red plaster stuck across the bridge of his nose. No doubt he'd end up with more scars to accompany the one from his eye to across his nose.

            "Yeah, your swollen lip is proof." Nadia muttered.

            "He got a detention, didn't he?" Yoli asked.

 "Fine, here I go."


	36. Brown And Yellow?

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: In this chapter, there's some major dissing of various fiction themes/topics. This is to (hopefully) add humour in the form of irony. I hope I don't offend anyone, and just for the record; BULMA/VEGETA AND OC FICS RULE! Here's Chapter 36!

            "Uh…Piccolo?" Nadia asked tentatively, as she entered the room.

            "What is it now?" Piccolo demanded.

            "I just wanted to say you and Gohan make a great couple and…" Nadia paused briefly, looking over to where Yoli held a thumbs-up sign. She closed her eyes before commencing her sentence. "…I want to say congratulations on coming out of the closet." Nadia opened an eye slowly as Piccolo didn't respond, and saw his antennae twitching. "Uh…you OK?"

            "You little brat! How dare you suggest I am homosexual? And with my best friend's son, who is like a son to me! I am Gohan's teacher!" Piccolo began, his voice starting to crack.

            "Is Piccolo…crying?" Joe asked Yoli in disbelief.

            "I'm so misunderstood! Why can't people understand that being A-sexual means I cannot, even if I wanted, have a sexual relationship with females, let alone males! It really hurts me that people think this!" Piccolo sobbed.

            "Um…there, there." Nadia patted Piccolo's back.

            "Detention!" Piccolo suddenly roared, causing Nadia to jump.

            "Yes! I mean, oh no. But I have so many things to do and stuff."

            "Tough crap, isn't it? You should've thought about that before…uh…making me…yeah." Piccolo trailed off.

            "OK, Piccolo. I will be at detention." Nadia said, walking out.

            "Lucky cow, you didn't get beaten up or anything!" Joe said enviously.

            "No, but that mental image of Piccolo crying will haunt my dreams forever." Nadia shuddered.

~*~

            "'Detention Room'. See, it has it's own shiny plaque and everything!" Yoli grinned; seemingly proud that she had detention.

            "Maybe Piccolo forgot." Joe said, looking around as if he had to be somewhere.

            "No, he didn't." Piccolo said, opening the door. "Come in."

            "Wow, this place is pretty spiffy." Nadia commented.

            "Better than our dorms." Yoli huffed bitterly, looking around the empty room save ten separate desks with a chair each.

            "Sit down, no talking. You will all write me a Dragon Ball Z based fiction." Piccolo instructed.

            "Damn, I need to get detention more often!" Yoli grinned, taking out a pencil and beginning to write.

            "Wait." Piccolo's voice boomed. "I didn't finish. You will all write me a Dragon Ball Z based fiction. _However_, it must be original. No I do not mean a Vegeta/Bulma get together with your own kooky twist."

            "Why the hell would I wanna write one of those? Now a Vegeta/OC is more my style! The OC looking surprisingly like me." Nadia grinned.

            "Which brings me onto my next point; no Original Characters or lemons." Piccolo smirked as the three students gasped. "Oh, and especially no parodies. In fact, no humour at all, it's all mainly regurgitated crap. Like this one fiction, 'Official Fanfiction University Of Dragon Ball Z' I heard about. Highly unrealistic and barely funny at all."

            "But…but…no Bulma/Vegeta, no Original Character, no humour, no lemons? What will we do?" Yoli demanded, collapsing onto her knees.

            "You will write a fiction worth reading, that's what." Piccolo said, crossing his arms and giving the students a steely glare.

~*~ (40 minutes later.)

            "You have twenty more minutes to complete this work." Piccolo said.

            "Shit." Nadia muttered, screwing up her piece of paper and adding it to the pile growing on her desk.

            "How're you doing?" Joe whispered.

            "Well, to be honest, I'm not. I keep writing an OC fic, it's my sub-consciousness! You?" Nadia asked.

            "Same. Yoli looks like she's coping though." Joe said, nodding in Yoli's direction, who was furiously scribbling away, a huge smile playing on her lips.

            "Yeah."

            "Shhh!" Piccolo hissed. "Time's up."

            "Here ya go!" Yoli grinned as she handed her paper over.

            "Here." Joe and Nadia said unenthusiastically as Piccolo had to practically snatch their one-paragraph fictions from them.

            "Just as I expected." Piccolo gave them a disapproving look. "What the hell is this?"

            "A fiction with no humour, no Bulma/Vegeta romance, no lemons and no OC!" Yoli grinned proudly.

            "But everyone dies in the opening paragraph!"

            "Yeah, but it has no humour, Bulma/Vegeta romance, lemons or OC!" Yoli grinned.

            "Why you…" Piccolo was cut off by an announcement over the loud speaker.

            "Can all students please report to the canteen for an emergency assembly." The voice called.

~*~ (Canteen)

            "Yesterday, two of our students were knocked over by hover-cars. Thankfully, they are uninjured, but something worse than this could happen. Which is why we're introducing uniforms. We believe the reason they were knocked over is because the driver couldn't see them. Yes?" Gohan asked Yoli, who had her hand up.

            "Are you sure it's not because they're blind shits?" Yoli demanded.

            "Or maybe the driver didn't like them." Nadia offered.

            "Um…no, I'm pretty sure that the driver couldn't see them. So, here are the two girls modelling our new uniforms." Gohan was the only one who applauded as the girls came on the stage, wearing the uniforms.

            "They're so…" Yoli began.

            "Yellow." Nadia finished.

            "And so…"

            "Yellow."

            "They're just plain minging if you ask me." Joe stated as the girls turned around. One was modelling a bright yellow shirt with a brown tie and pale yellow skirt, with brown shoes and knee length yellow socks. The other girl was modelling a brown sweatshirt, with bright yellow trousers and brown shoes. Each girl's hair was pulled into a ponytail held by a yellow scrunchie.

            "Can all students please return to their dorms where a uniform will be waiting." Gohan said, blinking in surprise as, instead of the usual crush, students were heard saying;

            "After you."

            "No, after _you._"


	37. Grey Hairs And Lilac Gloop

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Oh…my…god! I'm atheist but ah well, 402 bloody reviews! You guys fucking rule *Hugglez all authors even the ones that smell* No offence, I'ma just assuming you can't ALL smell nice. Ack, this thank ya is turning into a major bitching match! Sorry and thank you, the best two words in the world! Oh, and if you don't understand what some of the Japanese phrases I use mean, just ask in your reviews. I know that the majority of ff.net DBZ writers/readers know the basics so I won't insult your intelligence by listing what 'baka' I, but I also use some more uncommonly known ones, so don't hesitate to ask!

            "Hello, if I wanted to be a Brownie (A/N: Um…Girl scout to Americans I think…) I wouldn't of grabbed onto the car door for dear life when my mum tried to force me!" Yoli paced the room, kitted out in her uniform. Unfortunately, hers was two sizes too big, so she looked slightly more retarded than the other students.

            "I feel like a dandelion. I don't like dandelions. They suck." Sai muttered, staring at her reflection in the mirror.

            "Do I look as much of a dick as I think I do?" Joe asked, who had just knocked on the door.

            "Nope. You look ten times worse." Nadia said, answering the door. She motioned him in.

            "Brown's never gonna look good on me." Sai muttered in disgust, leaving the dorm and slamming the door behind her.

            "And that's another happy student at the University that is DragonBall Z." Yoli stated.

            "Look at Vegeta in his room, all dressed in normal clothes. Jammy git." Nadia muttered sourly.

            "You can see Skittles' room from here? Oh damn, you said he was wearing clothes." Yoli said disappointedly.

            "Yeah you can, and he sleepwalks!" Nadia offered.

            "What? And you didn't tell me this before because…?" Yoli asked.

            "What is this? Oh, hey J'dee." Nadia said, answering the door for the second time.

            "Here." J'dee threw 'Yamcha's' coat onto the bed, which she had been holding at long range with a stick.

            "Uh…you're not gonna beat us with that, are you?" Nadia asked, looking scared. (A/N: Muwhahaha! I'ma beat ya with a stick!)

            "What's wrong?" Joe asked, seeing the rage imprinted all over J'dee's face.

            "That is not Yamcha's coat! That fucking short Saiyan lied! It's Mr fucking Popo's!" J'dee enunciated each word carefully, clenching her fists as she did so.

            "How'd you know?" Yoli asked rather sulkily, choosing to ignore the Vegeta comment.

            "Here." J'dee said, picking the coat up with the stick and flinging it at Yoli.

            "Oh." Yoli said, as she looked at the name written on the label; 'Mr B Popo'

            "Wonder what the 'B' stands for." Joe pondered, inspecting the label.

            "Who gives a crap? I wanna know; where is Vegetable Head and Yamcha's coat?" J'dee demanded.

            "They better not be in the same place!" Nadia said, a worrying thought crossing her mind.

            "Only one way to find out…" Yoli answered, tying the sheets together and making a rope, which she dropped, out of the window. "You guys follow after me!" She called, half way down the homemade rope.

            "Nah, you're alright." Joe said. "We'll use the door."

~*~

            "Damn, who would've thought those sheets weren't that strong?" Yoli asked, throwing the remnants of the sheets in a nearby dustbin and dusting off her arse, which was covered in mud.

            "I think the whole 'Do Not Use To Create A Rope' label gave me that impression." Nadia said, sarcastically.

            "Oh, I didn't see that."

            "Yeah it was right next to the 'Yoli Is Stupid' label." Joe said, joining in.

            "Really, a sheet with my name on it? How spiffy!" Yoli said sincerely.

            "Guys, lets think about the plan in hand." J'dee said, a determined look on her face.

            "Which is…?" Nadia asked.

            "To find Yamcha's jacket. In failing that, to torture Vegeta." J'dee announced.

            "Now that sounds like fun!" Yoli grinned.

            "This way, I think." Nadia said, steering them right. They'd landed on the 'Forbidden Floor' some time ago, but since it was like the fifth time they'd been there it wasn't so forbidden anymore.

            "Underneath your clothes, there's an endless story. There's a man I chose…"

            "Is that Vegeta…?" Yoli asked, looking shocked as she pressed her ear up to the door.

            "I like a man who can sing." Nadia grinned.

            "…There's my territory. And all the things I deserve, for being such a good girl…"

            "Yo Skittles!" Yoli said, as she half fell and half pushed threw the door.

            "Ikeike! What are you doing here?" Vegeta demanded, dressed in a pink dressing gown and various hair care products surrounding him.

            "Were we interrupting something?" Joe asked, looking slightly scared.

            "Ok Vegetable Head, where the hell is Yamcha and his jacket?" J'dee demanded, getting straight to the point.

            "They're not here…are there?" Nadia asked, hoping the answer was 'no'.

            "Of course not!" Vegeta exclaimed, looking slightly taken a-back. Nadia sighed in response.

            "Ooo, Skittles, you wearing anything else besides that gown?" Yoli asked, winking at him.

            "Get the fuck out of my room, kusotarres!" Vegeta shouted, throwing a can of mousse at them-the nearest thing to him.

            "Woah, chill Veggie-Chan!" Nadia grinned, inspecting the bottle. "Aw, Veggie, you don't need to do anything to your hair. Its beautiful the way it is!"

            "That's not what the onna said." Vegeta muttered sourly.

            "What the hell did that bitch say?" Yoli demanded, getting an evil glint in her eyes.

            "She saw a grey hair." Vegeta said, just above a whisper.

            "WHAT? Is she insane? The stupid cow! How dare she? If she doesn't want you, I'll marry you!" Yoli said excitedly.

            "Why the hell would I marry you? Its like going from one extreme to the other!" Vegeta smirked.

            "Oh, hey Vegeta. Didn't know it was a slumber party." Goku said, arriving at the door.

            "What the hell is Kakkorrot doing here?" Nadia demanded.

            "Hello, back to the matter in hand? Yamcha?" J'dee demanded.

            "Oh, Yamcha's room in three doors down…ja mata…" Goku said, scratching his neck as J'dee rushed out of the room.

            "What are you doing here, Kakkorrot?" Vegeta demanded.

            "Don't you remember, Vegeta? You asked me to come, and bring Chi Chi's hair dye!"

            "What? That's a lie! It is!" Vegeta said as Nadia, Yoli and Joe gave him strange looks.

            "Here Vegeta, I'll do it for you. I do it for Chi Chi all the time." Goku offered, spreading the black gloop all over his hands.

            "No way!" Vegeta said, backing off. "I don't care if you use it on that Harpy's hair, you're not coming near me!"

            "Fine, have grey hair. Some people say leaving in grey hairs is a sign of growing old gracefully."

            "Get over here and put that stuff in my hair before I change my mind!" Vegeta ordered, as Goku smothered the gloop into his hair.

            "Hey Vegeta, this piece of cotton was in your hair." Goku said, rescuing the cotton from Vegeta's barnet.

            "Kakkorrot!" Vegeta bellowed. "That was my 'grey hair'. Damn that bakana onna!"

            "Nevermind Vegeta, this washes out after fifteen washes." Goku reassured his friend.

            "Um…is the dye supposed to go that colour?" Joe asked, furrowing his brow.

            "Maybe it's just the light." Nadia reasoned.

            "I doubt the light can turn black purple!" Yoli said.

            "Hmmm, that's a nice purple."

            "I'd call it lilac."

            "Kakkorrot! What are they talking about?" Vegeta demanded, trying to look up at his hair.

            "Gomen nasai, Vegeta. I think it's the wrong dye…" Goku started.

            "What?" Vegeta asked, standing up and quickly washing his hair. "Hows it look now?"

            "Sumimasen! Sumimasen!" Was all Goku said.

            "Hmmm, at least you match my walls now, Skittles!" Yoli grinned as she saw Vegeta's new lilac coloured hair.


	38. The Beginning Of The End

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z    ****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Yo to all the new reviewers!  Yep, Veggie now has 'Trunks hair'. A dressing robe is well…um…I dunno how to explain it. A bath robe is also another name for it if that helps? Hey all, thanks for the great reviews, especially those with personal notes cos it makes them that much more special!

Kusotarres: Assholes

Sumimasen: I'm really sorry

"What do we want?" Nadia yelled.

            "The right to wear our own clothes!" A small group of people, including Yoli and Joe, chanted on the forbidden floor.

            "When do we want it?"

            "Now!"

            "What do we want?"

            "The right to wear our own clothes!"  
  


            "And marry Skittles and have our own dorm right next to his!" Yoli joined in. Nadia blinked before shrugging her shoulders and carrying on.

            "When do we want it?"

            "Now!"

            "Or a few days!" Yoli added.

            "What do we want?"

~*~ (6 hours later)

            "What do we want?" A tired looking Nadia asked.

            "To have no fucking uniform, marry Skittles and have a decent goddamn dorm!" Yoli spat out, tired and edgy.

            "Yeah." The others in the group chorused, looking bored.

            "I said out, and you're not getting anything tonight unless you shut those brats up!" Bulma's shrill voice echoed down the hall.

            "But onna, my hair." Vegeta hissed, 'hmphing' as the door slammed shut in his face. "Brats, shut the hell up!"

            "What do we want?" Nadia asked, sounding slightly more determined.

            "Iie!" Vegeta snapped, as Yoli opened her mouth just about to say something. "No more uniforms! Just shut up!"

            "What about the other demands?" Yoli grinned.

            "Other demands? Like what?" Vegeta looked suspiciously at Yoli.

            "Like marrying you and moving next door to you." Yoli inquired.

            "As I said, shut the fuck up and you'll have no uniforms anymore."  
  


            "No deal." Yoli said, stubbornly.

            "Fine, shut the fuck up and I won't break your neck with a flick of my wrist." Vegeta threatened.

            "Deal, Skittles, deal!" Yoli grinned, flinching slightly as Vegeta smirked.

            "Woooo!" Everyone cheered, running back to their dorms to spread the news and burn their uniforms.

            "Oh, and Skittles." Yoli said. "Purple looks good on you." Yoli giggled, ducking as a slipper flew past her head.

~*~ (Next morning)

            "Uh…what are you so happy about?" Nadia muttered, shielding her eyes from the sun. "Its Saturday, lemme sleep."

            "Saturday…the last official day before end of term! Today is gonna be super spiffy!" Yoli grinned, already dressed and packing her things.

            "End of term? That went fast!" Nadia stated.

            "I'd say about…as long as it would take to write 38 chapters of a fic on ff.net." Yoli said, rolling all her clothes into a ball and stuffing them into a suitcase. "Oi, hurry up, get dressed and help me with this damned thing."

~*~ (Outside the University)

            "Hello ladies, how are you today?" Joe asked in a cheery voice.

            "Hi Joe!" Yoli said.

            "Hey. Warm today, isn't it?" Nadia asked.

            "Extremely." Joe said, sitting next to the girls on the fountain ledge.

            "Hey J'dee!" Nadia called to J'dee, who was walking past with a giant sack, rolls of masking tape and some rope.

            "Can't talk now." J'dee said, as she walked past and disappeared into the University.

            "That girl scares me." Yoli commented.

            "Yoli, you scare everyone." Joe said, poking his tongue out at her.

            "Everyone got their uniforms ready for later today?" Yoli asked, changing the subject.

            "What for?" Nadia inquired.

            "The bonfire!" Joe answered.

            "Yeah, we're gonna burn our uniforms tonight and make a big bonfire! Krillin said we could. I think he's a pyromaniac." Yoli offered.

~*~ (The Bonfire. Wow, this chapter seems to be hopping from place to place a lot!)

            "Woooooooo, look at it burn!" Yoli said gleefully.

            "Yeah, ugly clothes always burn well." Nadia added, munching on a hotdog.

            "Look, 18 and Krillin are dancing. His head is in a rather XXX-rated place, isn't it?" Joe asked.

            "I knew she didn't like him cos of his looks!" Yoli commented.

            "What looks? The ones where he looks like a drown rat?" Nadia laughed, taking a drink of coke.

            "I wonder what J'dee was doing earlier?" Joe asked.

            "Fuck knows. Anything with the equipment she had." Yoli said knowingly. "Not that I've used that stuff before." She added hastily.

            "Damn, my hair needs cutting." Joe said, looking up at the forest of hair on his head.

            "Mine too." Nadia agreed.

            "Does Trunks dye his hair then?" Yoli asked, looking at Vegeta's new hair colour.

            "No…I think Goku just had that bottle of hair dye lying around." Nadia said.

            "Weird." Yoli muttered.

            "Trunks got his hair from his grandfather I think." Joe informed them.

            "As soon as I get home tonight I'm gonna go on FanFiction.Net. I've missed it so much! Especially DarkAngel's fic, 'Is This A Dream?'. Talk about major updates!" Yoli said, rubbing her hands together at the prospect.

            "That fic rules." Nadia said, grabbing a burger and wolfing it down.

            "Ketchup. I need ketchup…" Yoli said in a sing-song voice, looking for some ketchup.

            "Yoli, I don't think there is any." Joe told the girl.

            "What? What kind of University is this? How can they do this to me? A hotdog with no ketchup? Has the world gone mad?" Yoli ranted from underneath the table, seemingly looking for some ketchup.

            "There's some mustard…nevermind." Joe said, as Yoli swatted the mustard bottle from his hands.

            "I don't want mustard! I want ketchup!" Yoli wailed. "God, if you're there and know where the ketchup is, give me a sign!"

            "Psssst." An eerie voice emerged.

            "Oh my fricking hell and sausages! I've been living in sin!" Yoli said, sounding shocked.

            "Pssst. Nadia, Joe!" The voice came again.

            "He doesn't know my name! I'm going to Hell! Oooooo, so is Skittles! Bring it on!"

            "Yoli." Nadia nudged Yoli in the arm. "Here."

            "Oh, yo J'dee!" Yoli grinned.

            "Hiya! I need your help." J'dee said, looking serious.

            "Dude, you sound like God!" Yoli said, protesting about her fallen hotdog as Nadia dragged her away from her ketchup search.

~*~ (Nadia/Yoli/Sai's Dorm)

            "What is it?" Nadia asked, out of breath from their long hike.

            "Here." J'dee pointed at a wriggling sack on Yoli's bed. "Do you guys have a large box or something?"

            "What is it?" Joe asked, keeping his distance.

            "Just something to set my plan in motion." J'dee said evasively.

            "Oh my God! J'dee! You kidnapped…I mean…you've taken…" Nadia stammered, looking at the figure emerging from the sack.  

A/N 2: This is the last chapter of Semester 1! Look out for Semester 2 in at least a week I will post it on this fic so as not to confuse people except it will have a 2 next to it or something. I am also writing a new fic, called 'Do It Yourself' about a girl who is obsessed with Mirai Trunks. However, when her hero comes to visit and asks her to take his place to ensure Vegeta and Bulma conceive him as he has a 'Lilac hair convention', how will she manage to cope? It will have a lot of my weird humour and I hope my reviewers will check it out ^_^


	39. We Get The Spiffy Sunglasses? I'm In!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: The first chapter of Semester 2, how spiffy?!

            "Wow, I feel all grown up and stuff!" Yoli said, special sauce smeared across her chin. "Damn, I've missed this food."

            "Oh, you look it aswell." Joe teased.

            "Did you all have a good holiday?" Jeril asked.

            "Yup!" Various agreements came from 'The Vegeta Table'.

            "Hi guys!" J'dee approached the table, perhaps the only person the 'Vegetarians' would allow to come within five metres of the sacred table.

            "Hi J'dee. Hows…um…'the thing'?" Nadia asked, subtly.

            "Oh, well I sent Yamcha the ransom note." J'dee whispered, checking no one was listening save Jeril, Joe and Yoli as they already knew about it.

            "How'd your mum take the news?" Yoli asked, a smear of special sauce now on her forehead.

            "She just thought it was a stray cat." J'dee giggled.

            "Ya know, if someone finds out, you could get in trouble." Joe warned.

            "Yeah right, like she's bothered. As long as she gets Yamcha, right J'dee?" Jeril asked.

            "You got it!"

            "So where's the object of this topic right now?" Nadia asked.

            "Yamcha? Taking a bath. He usually does at this time." J'dee stated.

            "Ok, I'm not even gonna ask how you know that." Jeril commented.

            "No, I mean Pu'ar!" Nadia whispered.

            "Oh, right here." J'dee pointed to the blue, furry hat on her head.

            "You killed Pu'ar? Don't you think that's a bit harsh…?" Joe asked, shocked.

            "Why? I'd kill Krillin for Skittles! Damn, I'd kill Krillin just because I felt like it!" Yoli added.

            "I didn't kill Pu'ar!" J'dee hissed. "She's under my hat!"

            "Oh!" Joe, Yoli, Nadia and Jeril chorused.

            "Well guys, I'll be seeing you. Gotta see if Yamcha has decided to pay the ransom." J'dee said, walking off.

            "I wonder what the ransom is." Joe mused.

            "Could be anything knowing her." Jeril replied.

            "Could the following students please visit the Headmaster's Office immediately; Nadia Goodyear, Jeril Dragonsoul, Silver Saiya-jin Washu, J'dee…um…just J'dee, SeaStorm and Yolanda Smelt." A female voice called over the loudspeaker.

            "It's Yoli you vaginas!" Yoli hissed.

            "Damn, Yoli, what have you got us into now?" Jeril asked.

            "Hey, I didn't do anything!" Yoli defended herself.

            "Whatever. Let's go. Come along, Yolanda." Nadia smirked. "Cya later Joe!"

~*~

            "Hi! I'm Silver Saiya-jin Washu, just call me Washu!" Washu greeted the group.

            "Hi, I'm Nadia." Nadia greeted.

            "Jeril."

            "Yoland-uh, Yoli." Yoli quickly corrected herself.

            "Wonder where J'dee is." Nadia looked around.

            "Probably seducing Yamcha right now." Jeril said.

            "Send them, get off me (!), in." Seventeen's strangled voice came from behind the door.

            "Look, Seventeen, I swear, they gave me that box of special sauce…uh, are you busy?" Yoli asked, looking at Seventeen.

            "Not at all!" Seventeen said, adjusting himself after throwing a student off of his back.

            "But Juunana-gou, you asked for me specifically! You can't deny your feelings for me!" The student said.

            "You scare me, you know that?" Seventeen addressed the girl.

            "I know you love it." The girl winked.

            "Uh…yeah…anyway, I called you students because I have a proposition for you."

            "I knew it!" The girl called. "Hi, I'm SeaStorm." She waved to the others.

            "She reminds me of someone." Nadia said, looking pointedly at Yoli who was eating the special sauce off her head.

            "Not that kind of proposition! I'm sure you remember the agents that introduced you to OFUD? Well, they have now graduated so I am looking for new agents, so I have called you six…why is there only five of you?"

            "Sorry I'm late." J'dee burst through the door, panting. "I had to seduce someone."

            "I knew it!" Jeril cheered.

            "I don't want to know. As I was saying, I'm asking you six to be agents." Seventeen explained.

            "Anything for you Juunana-gou." SeaStorm grinned.

            "We get the cool sunglasses and everything?" Yoli asked.

            "Um…of you like…" Seventeen said.

            "Woooo!" Yoli cheered.

            "Ok, well, you, you and you can be in the first set of agents." Seventeen pointed to J'dee, Nadia and Yoli. "And you, you and the weirdo can be in the second." He said, pointing to Jeril, Washu and SeaStorm.

            "Anything for you, my love." SeaStorm said, smiling.

            "My assistant will sort out your suits. Your first job will be tonight." Seventeen said, walking over to phone. "Mrs Briefs, could you please take the students to have suits and the like sorted out." 

            "Of course, send them through." Mrs Briefs replied in her chirpy voice.

            "Follow through that door." Seventeen pointed at an adjoining door from his office.

            "I'll miss you, Juunana-gou." SeaStorm said, waving goodbye. The only reason she was actually moving was because Yoli was dragging her away.


	40. Yo Skittles! Miss Me?

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Muwhahaha! Here we go! Second chapter…damn, I get excited easily! Oh, and thanks to SD and SS for the Seventeen plot, that will be written into the fic soon! Oh, and thanks to Chinow for advising me to allow ', a mega-hott, bad-attitude teacher with spiky black hair' to accompany them! Oh, and Chinow, what lesbian thing? I don't remember adding any lesbians in here :o\ Quorky! Have you been changing the chapters again?

            "Oh yeah, I'm an agent. Booyaa!" Jeril said, checking herself out in the mirror.

            "I still don't see why I get this." Yoli muttered, gesturing at her outfit.

            "Because none of the others fit you, you're too small!" Nadia said, exasperated.

            "But I look like a retard!" Yoli moaned, motioning to her overly large pants that kept falling down and huge shirt that just hung over her figure accompanied by an extremely large jacket that would fit Buu.

            "Here, just be thankful you have a normal head." J'dee said, handing Yoli her sunglasses.

            "I 'spose." Yoli said, slipping on her sunglasses.

            "Oh, don't you all look pretty." Mrs Briefs smiled, looking at the six girls.

            "Oh yeah, I look spiffy." Yoli muttered sourly.

            "Mrs Briefs, could you please send the students into the hall where they will meet their clouds?" Seventeen's voice asked over the intercom.

            "Of course…" Mrs Briefs started before being interrupted.

            "I love you!" SeaStorm called through the intercom.

            "C'mon guys, lets go." Jeril motioned to the others, as they left the room.

            "I must admit, we look good." J'dee grinned, as the six walked down the corridor, all in line with each other and wearing their sunglasses.

            "I'm Agent Z!" Yoli called to J'dee and Nadia.

            "Um…OK. What do you want to be, J'dee?" Nadia asked.

            "D's fine with me."

            "OK, I'll be B." Nadia agreed.

            "Right, well I'll be D, you can be B and you can be Z." Washu said, pointing to Jeril and SeaStorm in turn.

            "OK." Came the girls' replies. 

            "Not you lot!" Vegeta's voice sounded as he saw the girls coming down the corridor.

            "Aw, nice to know I was missed, Skittles!" Yoli grinned.

            "Move Veggie, we're agents." Nadia grinned, proudly. 

            "I know. I have to take you." Vegeta replied, somewhat glumly.

            "Me too!" Goku said, cheerily.

"Shut up, Kakkorrot." Vegeta rolled his eyes.

            "What?" All six asked. 

            "You didn't think that android would allow you to visit some poor students home alone did you? Kami only knows what you'd do." Vegeta sighed.

            "Plus, we need to make sure you're safe!" Goku added.

            "Well this is great! We're Year 2's, we're older and more mature!" J'dee argued.

            "Yeah!" Yoli agreed, trying to lick the special sauce off of her chin.

            "Why hello there, Miss Nadia!" A familiar voice called.

            "George!" Nadia ran up to the cloud. "You're not drunk again, are you?" 

            "What? No! I went into rehab, I am now clean and sober!" George stated, as an empty bottle of whisky fell out of his pocket. (A/N: These are some weird clouds!)

            "George!" Nadia tutted.

            "What? It's hard being a cloud! I feel so unloved!" George sobbed as Nadia hugged him.

            "Hi Fred, Bob!" J'dee called to her cloud- the Siamese twins.

            "Hi!" They called in unison. "Bob, get off of my arm!"

            "Excuse me, but it's both of our arm!"

            "Fido!" Yoli called to her cloud, who strangely resembled a dog.

            "Woof!"

            "Edna, have you been on the mushrooms again?" Jeril asked of her pensioner cloud.

            "No." Edna insisted, quickly shoving some mushrooms into her mouth. "It's not my fault! They call out to me! They're addictive!"

            "My cloud died." Washu said, sadly.

            "Awwwwwww." Everyone said on cue (save Vegeta).

            "You can share mine." SeaStorm smiled. "Hi Juunana-gou!" She called to her cloud.

            "How many times do I have to tell you, my name is Dave?" Her cloud demanded.

            "I got you a present, Juunana-gou. Here ya go." SeaStorm said, strapping Seventeen's bandana around his neck.

            "Where the fuck's my bandana?" Seventeen's voice demanded.

            "Let's go!" SeaStorm called, as the clouds took off, following Vegeta and Goku.


	41. Another Vegeta Obsessor

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews! Oh, and Meowm, I consulted my Japanese teacher and when writing 'Kusotarre' as plural it is known to add a 's' to the end to avoid confusion with readers. Also, I am aware what it means, it can mean either 'bastard' or 'asshole' and saying "You kusotarres (assholes/bastards)" is totally acceptable as it flows together.  

            "So Skittles, where is our first stop?" Yoli asked.

            "You mean your first victim? Someone in America, goes by the name 'DarkAngel'." 

            "DA? Oh, how cool!" Nadia said.

            "What's so good 'bout angels?" George slurred.

            "Cool? Not very, she was safe when just writing a fiction that insults me, but when you write a lemon scene with an original character that just crosses the border…" Vegeta shuddered.

            "Woah! Lemon scenes get you into OFUD? I must have a life sentence!" Yoli grinned.

            "I don't even want to know what you're implying." Vegeta muttered.

            "I think she means she's written a lot of fics that involve you naked." J'dee offered.

            "Haven't we all?" Jeril added.

            "Nope, nope. Not listening. Lalalalalala!" Vegeta stuck his fingers in his ears and began to sing.

            "These two are coming with us to keep us from harm and misbehaving?" Washu asked incredulously as she looked at Vegeta; who had his fingers in his ears and was singing. Then she looked at Goku; who kept crashing into birds as his GameBoy was distracting him.

            "You three follow me. The other three follow Kakkorrot." Vegeta instructed, branching off from their usual route.

~*~

            'How am I supposed to write this lemon scene with my mum in the room?' DarkAngel pondered to herself.

            "I'm going to make lunch." DA's mother announced before leaving the room.

            "Finally." DA muttered, switching on her computer. "Shit!" She swore as a large object came flying through the window. Well, technically, four objects.

            "Yo DA!" Yoli greeted.

            "What are you…Vegeta!" DA squealed upon spotting the Saiyan Prince.

            "Is this her?" Vegeta demanded, looking at the girl.

            "Yup." J'dee nodded.

            "Well, do the speech then!" Vegeta instructed, folding his arms.

            "Uh…speech?" The three girls asked in confusion.

            "Do I have to do everything?" Vegeta sighed. "Remember the agents who explained to you…?"  
  


            "Oh yeah!" Yoli grinned. "Well, Yolanda, you scare us. I mean, really scare us. So come with us quietly and we…"

            "They said that to you?" J'dee asked.

            "Not word for word, dumbass!" Vegeta shook his head in annoyance at Yoli.

            "Right, well, DA, you have crossed the…uh…border…" Nadia began.

            "Yeah, writing a Skittles/Original character lemon is bad!" Yoli scolded. "I read it, it was great!" Yoli whispered to DA.

            "Thanks!"

            "Get on with it!" Vegeta growled.

            "Hey Skittles, if I remember correctly, you growled like that in the lemon…nevermind." Yoli grinned.

            "So, you have been chosen to enrol in the Official Fanfiction University of DragonBall Z. You don't have to, but if you don't you won't be able to write anymore DragonBall Z fics." J'dee explained.

            "The University has three semesters which you have to graduate, then you get a spiffy looking 'DragonBall Z fic' card! Or so the brochure says." Yoli said.

            "Here are some papers you need to fill in. Oh, and if you're not truthful you have to live in a cell with Lunch lady Buu and Psychiatrist Cell." J'dee handed the papers to DarkAngel.

            "Once you've finished, a cloud will pick you up in five hours. Hopefully he won't be an alcoholic." Nadia looked pointedly at George.

            "Hey! I have issues!" George defended himself.

            "This…is…so…cool!" DA exclaimed jumping up and hugging the nearest person next to her- Vegeta. (What a coincidence!)

            "Woman, control yourself!" Vegeta huffed, disappearing from DA's grasp. "Myself and these sorry excuses for agents will see you in five hours." Vegeta explained. "Come on."

            "Bye DA!" Nadia said.

            "Seeya!" J'dee waved.

            "We're going? Oh crap! Here Fido!" Yoli ran around, looking for her cloud. He was under DA's desk chewing on someone's slipper. "Uh…sorry. Bye!" 

A/N 2: Wow, this is a really short chapter! Sorry guys, had a slight case of writers block! I'll make it up to ya on the next chapter!


	42. Hi, I'm DA

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Helloooo! I have a confession; I have no idea who the guys can pick up (Goku's Group) so the first **boy** who is not yet in this fic to review with their physical description, name and personality type will be in the next chapter, as I am planning on giving Nadia a love interest (thanks to a reviewer for that idea!) 

            "Goku, I wish you'd hurry up!" Washu called back, irritated.

            "Huh? But I'm on the last level of Wario Land…ouch!" Goku exclaimed, rubbing his head where he'd bumped into another telegraph pole.

            "How you feeling, Juunana-gou?" SeaStorm asked her cloud tenderly.

            "It's Dave damnit!" The cloud replied.

            "Oh, Juunana-gou, you crack me up!" SeaStorm laughed.

            "Goddamnit, it's Dave! I look nothing like that android!"

            "Yes you do, you have his bandana on!" SeaStorm stuck her tongue out.

            "Edna, what are you doing?" Jeril asked her cloud, looking at her suspiciously.

            "Oh, just knitting you a teeth warmer, dear." The elderly cloud replied.

            "A what…?" Jeril asked, confused.

            "A teeth warmer! It keeps your teeth warm!"

            "OK…hand over the mushrooms…"

            "What? No way! They're mine!" Edna snapped.

            "OK…OK! Kakkorrot, where are we headed now?"  Jeril asked, holding her hands up in despair.

            "This way!" Goku called happily.

~*~

            "I'm bored!" Yoli whined.

            "Yoli, we've only been waiting an hour." Nadia shot back.

            "Four more hours to go?" Yoli asked, looking pale.

            "Nope, just one. It took us three hours to get back here." J'dee explained.

            "Another hour?" Yoli whined. "But I'm bored! I don't even have any special sauce left!"

            "That's gross." J'dee looked at Yoli strangely.

            "Hey, it was perfectly good sauce, just because it was stuck onto my head means nothing!" Yoli defended herself.

"Ugh." Nadia and J'dee shuddered. 

"I'm bored."

            "We know, Yoli!" Nadia sighed.

            "But I really am. It's so boring here!"

            "Yeah, we get it." J'dee muttered, looking annoyed.

            "But it really is! I'm bored!"

            "Girl, say that again and I will personally send you to the next dimension!" Vegeta boomed, Yoli's whiney voice grating on his nerves.

            "Oooo, you promise to manhandle me, Skittles?" Yoli asked with a gleam in her eyes. "Damn, I'm bored!"

            "Right, that's it." Vegeta fumed, wrapping his hand around Yoli's throat.

            "Go on, do it! I'm dying from boredom as it is!"

            "Grrr." Vegeta growled, tightening his grip.

            "I'm…so…bored." Yoli gasped.

            "Stop it!" Vegeta yelled, tightening his grip furthur.

            "Bored." Yoli choked out.

            "Woah, Vegeta, Yoli, I'm sure we can work this out. We're all tired and bored." Nadia cringed as Vegeta squeezed harder on Yoli's neck when she mentioned 'bored'.

            "Vegeta, you don't want to do this. Yoli's not a bad person. She's really…and she's…and…" J'dee paused. "She's young!"

            "Yeah, besides, Seventeen wouldn't like you killing off a student!" Nadia said hurriedly as Yoli's face began to turn blue.

            "Like I give a shit what that android thinks." Vegeta muttered, but let go off Yoli nonetheless.

            "Ack…woo…that…" Yoli gasped out, trying to catch her breath.

            "You're lucky I didn't snap your neck, brat." Vegeta muttered.

            "Woo! I got manhandled and nearly choked to death by Skittles, the one and only! Thank ya!" Yoli grinned, hugging Vegeta's legs as she was sat on the floor.

            "Why you…"

            "Woah, woah. Back, Yoli, back." Nadia pushed her friend off of the angry Saiyan.

            "Hey guys! Did I miss much?" Joe called, joining the group.

            "Joe, hi!" Nadia greeted her friend.

            "Aren't you supposed to be in class?" Vegeta demanded.

            "Yeah…but I fainted and they gave me a free period."

            "You fainted? Why?" Yoli asked.

            "I fainted when I saw who was taking over Roshi's class." Joe grinned at the memory.

            "Who was it?" J'dee inquired.

            "The lovely Eighteen." Joe's eyes took on a distant look.

            "Oh. Well we went and saw DA! She's coming here 'cos she wrote an original character/Skittles lemon." Nadia explained. "Joe?"

            "It was a good one aswell!" Yoli smirked. "No, I lie! I lie! It was evil and horrible and a threat to society!" Yoli retracted her statement when Vegeta raised his arm.

            "And the best bit is; I'm the only boy in the class!" Joe grinned. "Oh the possibilities!"

            "Ooo, ooo! DA's here!" Yoli jumped up and down excitedly as she saw a cloud in the distance.

            "Hey DA!" The four students greeted as DarkAngel crash-landed.

            "Shit, that hurt." DA exclaimed rubbing her butt.

            "Um…interesting cloud…" Joe looked at the brightly coloured pink and yellow spots covering the cloud.

            "Yeah, we kinda had an accident. Miss Bitch decided to take a detour through a paint factory." DA looked down at her cloud unimpressed,

            "Well maybe you shouldn't have name me 'Miss Bitch'!" The cloud shot back.

            "What? It's cool!" DA stated.

            "As much as I love clouds tearing apart their pathetic owners, you need to check into the University." Vegeta said.

            "Hi." DA looked at Vegeta with hearts in her eyes. "I'm DA."

            "Right, follow me." Vegeta stood up.

            "Hi. I'm DA." DarkAngel repeated.

            "Yes, we've already established that. You four can get back to class and stop playing hookey." Vegeta ordered.

            "But…but…they make me work!" Yoli moaned.

            "Hi. I'm DA." DarkAngel looked up at Vegeta and smiled.

            "Follow me." Vegeta sighed, heading towards the 'Receptionist's Office'. "Are you allergic to anything? Or have any diseases we should know about?" Vegeta took a slight step back upon mentioning the latter.

            "Hi. I'm DA."  
  


            "O…K." Vegeta waved a gloved hand in front of DA's face. "What day is it?"

            "Hi. I'm DA."

            "Right, how old are you?"

            "Hi. I'm DA."

            "Great, just great." Vegeta muttered, as he re-directed DarkAngel to the nurses' office.


	43. To Kill A Saiyan

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Yo all! I am going insane; it is official. I am seeing and hearing things. If anyone spots doctors in white heading my way, be sure to say you've never heard of a 'BananaGirl', or that you think she got attacked by rabid sponges and died. Thanks in advance! Oh, I've mentioned Bardock in this chapter and he'll make an appearance in a later chapter.

            I'm sure you've all heard of the wonderful author that is J'dee, yeah? But did you know she is multi-talented? Yep, it is true; we now have an official reason to hate her- because she is better than all of us (well, most of us anyway). She drew Yoli and Nadia, complete with spiffy captions! Wanna see, nevermind, of course you wanna see! Here's the URL's (once again, she shows her multi-talentness by uploading them. Grrr, I wanna infect her with ma hate juice now);

http://www.angelfire.com/anime4/jdee/Nadia.jpg

  
  
http://www.angelfire.com/anime4/jdee/Yoli.jpg

            Anywho, this author's note is becoming more like a whole chapter so I will leave. Just a word of warning, the chapter may be a little…screwy, mainly because I have a play list from Blink 182's 'Adam's Song' to Bowling 4 Soup's 'Girl All The Bad Guys Want'. Hmm-interesting lyrics in both of them, so if I talk about un-plugged phones, spilt apple juice, two-ways or growing a moustache, just blame it on the sponges.

            "Hello Vegeta, what brings you here?" A whiney voice greeted the Saiyan Prince.

            "How many times, damnit? It's 'Prince Vegeta'!" Vegeta shoved DA into the room. "She seems to be…broken."

            "Broken?" The short, balding figure in a nurse's uniform asked, looking at DA in confusion.

            "Yes, broken! Ask her what day it is!"

            "What day is it?" The short figure asked.

            "Wow! You're Babidi! How cool? This is so cool!" DA exclaimed, breaking out of her trance.

            "She seems fine to me. A new recruit, I assume? They're normally this happy to begin with. Give it a couple of weeks, then she'll go into the depressive, smart-ass mode that all the students acquire." Babidi informed.

            "Hmph. The baka kept repeating herself earlier." Vegeta folded his arms.

            "Hi, I'm DA." DarkAngel looked up at Vegeta and her eyes glazed over again.

            "There, she did it again!" Vegeta pointed an accusing finger at her. "What colour is my spandex?" (A/N: OMG…mental image coming through.)

            "Hi. I'm DA." DarkAngel remained the same, except her eyes seemed to grow larger and she emitted an inaudible sigh when he mentioned 'spandex'.

            "Hmmm, peculiar." Babidi mused, straightening his nurse's uniform of crinkles. "What's your name?" He asked DarkAngel.

            "DarkAngel, what's it to you? Oh, and I thought you totally sucked. You were hardly in DragonBall Z and when you were your voice was so annoying!" DarkAngel snapped, looking down at the wizard.

            "She seems fine to me." Babidi huffed.

            "Damnit, brat, stop acting crazy!" Vegeta shook DarkAngel to try and knock some sense into her.

            "Hi. I'm DA." DA replied, once seeing Vegeta again.

            "It seems she's…obsessed with you." Babidi took some notes.

            "Another one?" Vegeta demanded.

            "Yes, I do believe this is the three hundred and sixty fifth student you've brought in with this condition." Babidi mused. "None of the other teachers have had this problem, although Bardock is acquiring some students who seem to think he's Goku and have gone into a state of disillusion when told 'Get lost or I'll go Saiyan on your ass'." Babidi informed.

            "Well, it's only natural that they'd be obsessed with me. I am the Prince of all Saiya-jins." Vegeta boasted.

            "Hi. I'm DA." DarkAngel gave a faint smile.

            "But that is annoying!" Vegeta scowled.

            "Try insulting her, that usually works for you." Babidi offered.

            "Listen, you pathetic weakling, stop your snivelling and come with me, you've got assembly in five minutes! It's totally understandable that you're taken with me, as I am the Saiya-jin Prince, but you better move your fat ass before I…"

            "Hey, my ass is not fat you big-headed asshole! Just because your incredibly gorgeous does not mean you should know it! Some people!" DarkAngel shook her head in disgust.

            "She's fixed, lets go." Vegeta smirked, turning on his heel and exiting the office. "Keep up!"  
  


            "It's OK, I'll follow behind." DA replied, turning her head to decide which was the best angle to view his spandex-clad butt.

~*~

            "This is the house. His name is S'rac." Goku informed the three agents.

            "Uh…what do we do exactly?" Washu asked.

            "Well, the agents awoke me from a very nice dream involving my beloved Juunana-gou, and I don't mean the cloud either." SeaStorm commented, still bitter about the agent's rude arrival.

            "Well I was in the middle of eating creampuffs and reading a very interesting lemon!" Jeril stated.

            "I guess we just go through the window." Goku said absent-mindedly, still caught up in his GameBoy.

            "Sounds fun to me!" Washu grinned, as the three agents crashed through a window.

            "I think we were supposed to go through his window!" Goku said, looking around the nursery.

            "Oooo, I got a new playmate!" A four-year old girl said, standing up and shakily walking over to Goku. "Hi mister, what's your name?"

            "Son Goku." Goku smiled at the girl.

            "Uh…Goku, the new recruit?" Washu reminded Goku, as did Jeril with a smack upside his head.

            "Ow! What was that for?" Goku demanded, rubbing his head.

            "Dunno, it just looked fun." Jeril shrugged her shoulders.

            "Wanna help me build a house with my building bricks?" The girl pulled on Goku's pants.

            "What happene…" A teenage boy came running into the room in his underwear, his hair ruffled, stopping dead in his tracks when he saw the four strangers.

            "Uh…hi." SeaStorm waved at the boy. "What do we do now?" She whispered to the others.

            "Hiya! We're from the University of DragonBall Z. Wanna come join us? We have some…uh…crumpled leaflets here that you must fill in and be truthful 'cos bad things will happen. Just ask Jeril here!" Washu pointed to Jeril, oblivious of the boy's blue eyes darting around the room for the heaviest object he could find.

            "I can't right now, I've got to work." Goku said to the girl, a little reluctantly.

            "Hey, isn't that…GOKU!" The boy stared wide-eyed at the anime character.

            "Heehee, that's me." Goku grinned.

            "Anywho, as my friend was saying, you gotta come 'cos it's great! Goku, Vegeta, Trunks, Goten, Gohan, Buu, Cell, they're all teachers there! It's really, really cool! Just fill these out and a cloud will be here shortly to take you there!" Jeril said.

            "A…cloud?" The boy spoke for the first time.

            "Uh huh! Kinda like Nimbus, but they talk and insist their name is Dave!" SeaStorm looked pointedly at her cloud.

            "But I am called Dave, you freak!" Her cloud shot back.           

            "See!"

            "Your cloud…it can…talk." The boy stated.

            "Yep, and knit!" Jeril added. "So just fill these out. You've gotta enrol 'cos otherwise you won't be able to write DragonBall Z fics and that'd simply suck 'cos well…it just would."

            "Um…OK." S'rac took the enrolment papers from Jeril's outstretched hand and thanked her.

            "No problems, S'rac! See ya at the University in five hours!" SeaStorm said. "Oh and ya might wanna get some clothes on."

            "Hey, I just woke up!" S'rac defended himself.

            "Oh, right. Did I wake you from a good dream? That happened to me. Sucks, don't it? Anyways, we better get going. Bye!" SeaStorm said, as the four flew back from where they came.

            "O…K." S'rac rubbed his head in confusion and looked down at the papers. "Asexual? What the hell?"

~*~

            "Hi, I'm looking for a book on how to kill Saiyans. Do you know where I can find them?" A girl asked the librarian.

            "Um…in the back somewhere. How should I know?" The librarian asked haughtily, going back to drawing a picture of Mirai Trunks.

            "Maybe because you're the librarian?" The girl shot back.

            "Ugh, don't remind me." The librarian shuddered. "Like my picture?" The librarian held up a picture of Mirai Trunks and herself getting married.

            "Um…yeah, very nice." The girl said, starting to walk away.

            "I know! It goes with my others!" The librarian showed the girl a scrapbook of various pictures, all featuring herself and Mirai Trunks. One was of them kissing, one was at someone's birthday party, one was of Mirai Trunks holding the librarian whilst flying and one was…well, let's just say if I told you I'd have to up the rating of this fic to NC-17.

            "Right…" The girl hurried off to the back of the library, where she picked out five books that promised to tell you how to kill a Saiyan. "Soon Goku, soon." The girl sat at a table and rubbed her hands together gleefully. "Hmm, this seems like a perfect time for an evil cackle." The girl looked around and took a deep breath."Muwhahahahahahahahahahaha."

A/N2: Oooooooooo, a murder mystery in OFUD! Oh, and so you know, that librarian is my sister O.o She keeps begging me to put her in, so hopefully now she'll shut the hell up and lemme get on with ma writing!


	44. The Bigger The Age Gap, The More Lemony ...

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey everyone! Uh, Saiyjin Girl, I'd love to be in ya fic! I dunno where your board thingy is though O.o Well, I'll tell you here;

Looks: Shoulder-length dark brown hair

Dark brown eyes

4'9-5'0 (It depends what mood I'm in, lol)

I usually wear baggy jeans and huge t-shirts/black shirts

Personality: Uh…I is very very sarcastic. I laugh at people when they're in great pain or embarrassed. I have tendencies to break silence by screaming for no reason or saying 'beep beep, brum brum' when I'm bored. I rant about rabid sponges and the oh-powerful toaster. I'm an atheist. I listen to Punk Rock music. I'm very obsessive and very possessive (hey I can rhyme!) and I love bananas. Of course, I want Vegeta to end up in ma room! What kinda question is that, ya silly girl!

Damn, last chapter's author's note was long! I mean long! So, I'ma just shut up now and give you Chapter 45!

            "Excuse me, are you Nadia Goodyear?" A girl with brown-black hair and brown eyes tapped Yoli on the shoulder.

            "Huh, me? Nah, I'm too weird. This is Nadia." Yoli pointed to her friend.

            "Oh, hi. I'm Sarya-san and I hear you have an alcoholic cloud?"

            "What? Oh no, what's George done now?" Nadia sighed in exasperation.

            "Oh nothing! I was just wondering, you must have a lot of empty bottles just lying around, right?" Sarya-san asked hopefully.

            "Well…yeah. Mostly whiskey, he seems to be partial to that." Nadia shook her head, not quite believing she was discussing her dysfunctional cloud's addiction. "Why?"

            "I was wondering if I could use them? I'm doing a…um…project and it involves a lot of bottles." 

            "Oh, well sure. You're in my 'Basic Rules Of Fanfiction' class for periods five and six, right? At the back, two desks over?" Nadia asked.

            "Yeah! OK then, I'll get them off you in periods five and six! Seeya…oof!" Sarya-san coughed as she fell over, the wind knocked out of her.

            "Sorry!" A girl from Yoli's spelling class, Burenda, apologised. "I'm in a hurry, someone's selling 'How To Catch Bardock In Five Minutes' kits in the left wing." She explained, running off again.

            "Ow. Bye then." Sarya-san waved as she made her way to periods three and four.

            "We better be off aswell." Nadia said as the bell rang.

            "Damn, I hate 'Couplings'!" Yoli muttered, following Nadia.

~*~

            "Let's start with the basics. Would any of you ingrates like to explain to me why Pan/Trunks couplings are not acceptable?" Bardock paced in front of the classroom, a pointing stick held in his hand.

            "Looks like someone missed their toasted bagel and cream cheese with cucumber this morning." Nadia whispered to Yoli.

            "I know and that stick is scaring me. He hasn't got anything to point at, so he must be on a power-trip!" Yoli eyed the stick warily.

            "You there, with the stupid hat on." Bardock pointed to a student wearing an average baseball cap, causing the students in the front row to duck as the stick went sailing over their heads.

            "Um…they're stupid because Pan's mine!" The boy foolishly said.

            "Nu uh!" A girl stood up abruptly. "They're stupid because Trunks is mine!"

            "You're all wrong!" Nadia stood up to put in her two cents. "It's a trick question! Pan/Trunks fics aren't stupid, they're great with the best lemons!"

            "Wrong, wrong, wrong!" Bardock boomed, hitting the desk in front of him with his stick on each 'wrong', causing the students to lean backwards as far as they could to protect their fingers. "They are ridiculous because of the huge age gap."

            "But that's what makes the lemons so good!" Nadia hissed to Yoli, who nodded in agreement.

            "Ah, Burenda, nice to see you could make it." Bardock's voice dripped in sarcasm as Burenda came bursting through the door.

            "Really? It's nice? Aw, I knew you loved me!" Burneda grinned from ear to ear.

            "Sit down." Bardock ordered. "Now, why are Vegeta/Chi Chi fics ridiculous?"

            "What? Who the hell wrote that? This is an outrage!" Yoli stood up.

            "Yeah, like fuck he'd choose that harpy!" Nadia joined her friend.

            "They're not ridiculous, because on what we guess, Chi Chi's behaviour is very similar to a Saiyan's. She, Videl and Bulma have that part of them in common; their feistiness and I don't think it's a coincidence that the three strongest Saiyan's choose them as mates." Charlotte, the University's swot, sat down in satisfaction after her speech.

            "You're wrong. It is ridiculous." Bardock stated simply. "Now who can…"

            "What?" Charlotte stood up again. "How am I wrong?"

            "Because you are. Now sit down!" Bardock yelled.

            "Muwhahaha. That showed her." Nadia whispered. "Yoli…Yoli? You OK, you look kinda green."

            "Ugh, I just had a gross image involving Bardock." Yoli shuddered involuntarily.

            "What?" Nadia practically screamed.

            "I can't help it! He's so Skittles-like! But then I see his face and he looks like that fool Kakkarot and I start to feel sick and…ugh." Yoli shuddered again. "Damn, I'm confused."

            "Aw, it's OK. It's just a phase, I'm sure it'll pass."

            "I hope so!" Yoli muttered.

            "Here, this'll help!" Nadia grinned, pulling out some Chibi Vegeta manga causing both girls to squeal in delight.

            "And that is why Master Roshi/Piccolo fics are ridiculous and, not to mention, disgusting." Bardock finished.

~*~

            "Yo, Sarya-san! Here are the…uh…bottles…you…asked for." Nadia heaved the huge bag of whiskey bottles onto Sarya-san's desk with great difficulty.

            "Thanks!" Sarya-san smiled.

            "No problem, what're you gonna do with them?"

            "Oh…nothing…it's just a project." Sarya-san shrugged non-commitedly.

            "Oh…k." Nadia returned to her desk. "That girl is plotting something." Nadia whispered to Yoli.

            "Mhhhm, that's nice." Yoli said absent-mindedly, too caught up in the Chibi Vegeta manga.

~*~

            "Oh Nadia, come over here!" Yoli gestured for her friend to join her at the window. "Skittles is about to take a shower!"

            "This is wrong." Nadia shook her head. "Now this is better!" She grinned, pulling the binoculars up to her face.

            "Hey, where's he going?" Yoli demanded, as she saw Vegeta leave his room.

            "Aw, that's not fair!" Nadia muttered, putting the binoculars back into her drawer.

            "Hey, it's my birthday next week!" Yoli grinned, after checking out the calendar.

            "Really? Ooo, we'll have to throw you a really cool party!"

            "A surprise costume party?" Yoli asked hopefully.

            "Sure…but, how can it be surprise if I've just told you?" Nadia looked at Yoli in confusion.

            "I'll pretend I'm surprised!" Yoli did her best 'surprised' look.

            "Ok, it can be surprise." Nadia laughed. 

            "Shhh!" Yoli hissed. "What's that?"

            "It's coming from the hall!" Nadia whispered, following Yoli as she crept to the door and held her ear there.

            "Grrr, I'll get you, Bubbles. Oh yeah, Buttercup? Well I never liked you either! And Blossom, that ribbon is ugly!" Nadia and Yoli heard the voice mutter. "I know your secret- you're evil aren't you? The evil PowerPuff Girls! I knew it!"  
  


            "Is that…?" Yoli trailed off.

            "Only one way to find out." Nadia said, as she opened the door.


	45. Poor Fluffy!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey guys. Some bad (or good, depending whether you think I suck big, hairy dick or not) news. I'll be away from 17th-24th of August me thinks, so no updates. Oh, and this chapter is really…perverted and, well, crude, so I suggest if you don't like that then not to read! Ack, when is OFUD not perverted and crude? Anywho, here's Chapter 46!

            "S-s-skittles?" Yoli managed to choke out.

            "Ow! Blossom, you're so mean!" Vegeta whimpered in his sleep. He was dressed in some black boxers and hitting the air around him as if having a nightmare.

            "Wow, all sleepwalking, all sleeptalking Veggie came to our bedroom dressed in his boxers." Nadia grinned. 

            "Where the fuck is my camera?" Yoli hissed, tearing the dorm apart. She emerged with a video-recorder and a camera. She handed Nadia the video-recorder. "Say cheese."  
  


            "Damn PowerPuff Girls, I'll teach you to mess with the Prince of all Saiya-jins!" Vegeta threatened, powering up to SSJ.

            "Wow, ya know Yoli, now would be the perfect time to solve the biggest question in DragonBall Z history." Nadia grinned. "Do all Saiyans' hair turn yellow?"

            "Only one way to find out!" Yoli crept towards Vegeta silently, her arms outstretched. However, in her excitement, she tripped over her own feet and fell over, causing the camera to go off, emitting the bright light of the flash.

            "Ha, not so tough now are you Bubb…what?" Vegeta rubbed his eyes, waking up.

            "Damn stupid feet! This'll teach you to mess with me!" Yoli began to punch her feet. "Ow."

            "Oh…hey Prince Vegeta, sir." Nadia grinned, quickly hiding the video-recorder behind her back.

            "What the hell am I doing here in the middle of the night, and why are you two ogling me?" Vegeta demanded, looking down at Yoli who'd stop beating on her feet and was trying to see through Vegeta's boxers.

            "Because you're in your underwear, and although it doesn't leave much to the mind, I still have to imagine the most important anatomy of your body." Yoli sighed.

            "Hmph, keep imaging, brat, because this is the closest you'll ever get to seeing the Prince of all Saiya-jins naked." Vegeta re-thought that statement, remembering the videos they'd seen. "In the flesh, that is." He added.

            "Damn!" Nadia muttered, as if she thought Vegeta would suddenly do a strip tease for her right there. "Say, Vegeta, how much does alcohol affect you?"

            "Hmph, as if a weakling, earth substance could weaken me." Vegeta scoffed, folding his arms.

            "Uh…Vegeta, you're still in your underwear…" Yoli trailed off, drowning in her own perverted images.

            "I am quite aware of that, brat. Hmph, I don't see why Earthling's seem to have a fixation on clothes anyway." Vegeta shook his head.

            "Me neither. In fact, let's just forget that stupid tradition and strip right now. You first." Nadia grinned, hoping to fool the Saiyan into getting naked.

            "Hmph, like you could handle seeing me naked. I am, after all, the Prince of all Saiya-jins and seeing me naked would just overload your senses and send you into a six month coma, in which when you finally do recover you will awaken as a stuttering wreck." Vegeta smirked.

            "I don't mind, it's a small price to pay!" Nadia pleaded. "Uh…it seems Yoli's already there." Nadia looked down at her friend who was sat cross-legged in the hall, eyes fixated on Vegeta's groin. 

            "Brat, brat!" Vegeta snapped his fingers in front of Yoli's face.

            "Huh? Oh hey Skit'! I was just…uh…" Yoli was lost for words (for once!).

"Yes, I know, you were staring at my groin." Vegeta stated simply.

            "I…uh…" Yoli blushed and began punching her feet again.

            "Hmph, not that I blame you, I am gorgeous." Vegeta smirked.

            "Yes you are." Nadia sighed, leaning on the doorframe.

            "Well, as much as I enjoy conversing with weakling brats such as yourself dressed only in my underwear, I think I'll leave." Vegeta said sarcastically. "The shorter brat is creeping me out with her insaneness and tendencies to ogle me." Vegeta added to Nadia, pointing to Yoli who'd taken on a glazed-over expression.

            "Oh…my…God." Nadia breathed, watching Vegeta walk away. Well, watching his arse anyway.

            "Oh yes, I'm going to sleep well tonight." Yoli stretched, coming out of her glazed state.

            "Me too." Nadia smirked, putting the video-recorder into her drawer and climbing into bed. "Yoli?"

            "Mmm?" Yoli asked, pulling her bedspread around her.

            "Why's Vegeta afraid of PowerPuff Girls?"

            "Dunno, must be some childhood thing. Maybe that's why he detests Frieza so much, because he made poor Skittles watch PowerPuff Girls re-runs." Yoli suggested.

            "Yeah, or maybe he actually met the PowerPuff Girls and they were bitches to him!" Nadia speculated.

            "Psssh, yeah right Nadia. PowerPuff Girls aren't real!" Yoli scoffed.

            "Hey, DragonBall Z isn't, I mean wasn't, either!" Nadia defended herself.

            "Nu uh, I always knew DragonBall Z was real!" Yoli stated. "Dragon, dragon, rock the dragon, DragonBall Z!" Yoli sang happily.

            "Or, maybe his mum and dad thought 'Geta was gonna be a girl and decorated his nursery as PowerPuff Girls and it gave him nightmares!" Nadia concluded.

            "Yeah, that's a good one! Or maybe, he had a dog, and this dog kept eating his PowerPuff Girls action figures, and they decided to get their own back, and the dog wasn't strong enough, and the PowerPuff Girls ate Fluffy, and…."

            "Fluffy?" Nadia asked.

            "Skittles' dog! Keep up woman! Anyways, they ate Fluffy, and Vegeta found his poor dog's tail hanging out of that bitch, Bubbles' mouth and he started to cry but the PowerPuff Girls just sat there and mocked Chibi Vegeta so he cried some more and they kicked him and made fun of his hair and…poor Fluffy!" Yoli wailed, wiping away her tears. "Chibi Vegeta, ignore them, I like your hair!" Yoli yelled between sobs.

            "Yoli…?" Nadia asked tentatively.

            "Y-y-yes?" Yoli sniffled.

            "You scare me. You scare me a lot." Nadia admitted.

            "Nadia, have you met my mum?" Yoli asked, her voice back to normal.

            "Uh…no. Why?"

            "No reason, except she says that. She says 'Yoli, honey, you scare me. You scare the shit out of me.'"


	46. This Means War

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Thanx for the reviews! Just to be clear, I meant no updates during the 17th-24th, so I will be updating until then ^_^ Lmao, and guys, is it so obvious I'm from England? I must've got like 7 emails asking me if I were/that it was cool. Hmmm, why's it so obvious? Maybe it's cos most English people are insane or depressed…mine being both O.o Don't know how I manage that, but ah well. Oh, and if I'm not talking to you on MSN, it's because it's screwing up, not because I'm ignoring you so keep trying and hopefully it'll start working again. *Kicks MSN* Anywho, on with the fic;

            "Nadia, did last night really happen?" Yoli asked her friend at breakfast.

            "Yep." Nadia grinned.

            "Oh, what was last night?" DarkAngel asked, taking a drink of orange juice.

            "Yeah, please tell!" A girl with black hair asked. She was new to the Vegeta table, as her taste for Mirai Trunks had gotten smaller whereas her tastes for the Saiyan Prince had grown.

            "Well…" Nadia began.

            "OK, well Skittles had this dog, Fluffy, but the PowerPuff Girls had eaten him and Chibi Vegeta was so upset that he…"

            "Yoli, no one gives a damn about Fluffy!" Nadia hissed.

            "Psssh, you wouldn't say that if Fluffy was here now!" Yoli stuck her tongue out at Nadia.

            "Just tell us already!" DarkAngel said.

            "Well, last night Vegeta came to our room in his boxers." Nadia grinned, watching the whole of the tables' faces fault.

            "Are you sure you're not mistaking this with a dream, or a fanfiction you've written?" A girl with blonde hair asked.

            "Nope. He was sleepwalking, and we went to see what was wrong. He was whimpering in his sleep about PowerPuff Girls." Nadia grinned as the whole table let up a chorus of 'awww's'.

            "Ack, we better get going." The blonde girl said, looking at her watch.

            "Alright!" Yoli cheered, happy about going to class for once. The reason was because Vegeta taught it, and the students in there were all female and all on the Vegeta table, save Dark Angel and a girl with black hair as they were only in their first semester.

~*~

            "Can any of you pathetic excuses for the next generation tell me what we're going to be doing in this class? The big hint is, this class is called 'Analysing Character Emotions In Your Fiction'." Vegeta sneered. "You. Short brat." Vegeta pointed at Yoli.

            "Heehee, Skittles said _anal_ysing…muwhahahaha, anal…heehee." Yoli snickered.

            "And that, kids, is why drugs are bad." Nadia joked.

            "Concentrate!" Vegeta thumped his fist onto his desk, causing it to break.

            "Uh…we're going to be analysing character emotions in our fiction?" A girl offered.

            "Correct." Vegeta barked, causing the girl to grin widely. "Not that it was hard, I'm surprised a weakling like you even got it right. Now, hands up who has created an original character fiction before." Vegeta blinked as every hand shot up in the room. "Going around the class, we will see the various titles and characters you humans have come up with. You, start."

            "The title was 'Another Boring Day…NOT!' and instead of a character in the DragonBall Z world, it was set in our world where DragonBall Z characters visited us." Jeril explained, grinning as various shouts and cheers came from the students who had read her fic.

            "My title was 'Give Me One Good Reason' and my character was a female Saiyan who fell in love with one of the Z fighters." The girl said evasively.

            "Which Z fighter?" Vegeta demanded.

            "Uh…you…"

            "Let me guess, she was intelligent, pretty, funny, strong, possibly used to be evil, bad tempered with a short fuse?" Vegeta smirked.

            "Wow, does he realise he practically described himself?" Nadia whispered to Yoli.

            "Uh…yeah, you read my fic?" The girl asked, confused.

            "No." Vegeta replied curtly. "Let's see how I know, shall we? How many people in here have written a fiction similar, if not identical, to this girls here?" Vegeta smirked as the majority of hands went up.

            "What's wrong with that? We all like reading these type of fictions, right?" Nadia voiced her opinion.

            "You!" Vegeta said, as if it pained him to see her. "Everything is wrong with pairing me up with a baka you humans have created in the tiny space between your ears!" Vegeta spat. "This is not the concern, however, the concern is keeping your character…in-character, whether its an original or not."

            "But we do keep our characters in-character!" Yoli insisted.

            "Yeah right, you wish." Vegeta scoffed. "OK, hands up again. No, not now, when I've asked the damn question!" Vegeta sighed in exasperation. "Who in here have had their emotionally strong female character cry over something pitiful, such as someone calling her names and the like?" 

            "Maybe they were really, really bad names, like slut or dickhead!" A girl offered.

            "Shut up and sit down, dickhead." Vegeta smirked. "See, you didn't cry. Now, hands up…wait for the damn question! Hands up those who have made a character like the Namek or…myself cry in or out of public." Vegeta growled as every hand shot up.

            "But Veggie, you're so cute when you cry!" A girl cooed.

            "Yeah, plus we girls find it easier to get you into the sack if you show some vulnerability." Yoli smirked.

            "Aw Veggie, we know you have a soft side. We heard all about the PowerPuff Girls incident."

            "PowerPuff Girls? What?" Vegeta demanded, looking at the room full of teenage girls.

            "Awwww, he's shy." Nadia smiled.

            "Awwww." The rest of the class chanted.

            "Stop it!" Vegeta demanded, yet the class kept 'aww'ing. "Stop right now!" Vegeta covered his ears.

            "See, you do have a sensitive side." Nadia grinned.

            "Wow. He's hot, dangerous, evil and sensitive. My God am I in love." Yoli stared at Vegeta dreamily.

            "I am not sensitive!" Vegeta insisted.

            "He's so dreamy!" A girl cooed.

            "So, so fine!" Another said longingly.

            "And chivalrous." 

            "What?! I am not sensitive!" Vegeta's voice grew louder and angrier. "I am not dreamy! I am especially not chivalrous and I am so not fine!" Vegeta raged, and then re-thought his speech. "Well, I am pretty hot…"

            "So true, Skittles, so true!" Yoli yelled.

            "Ahhhh!" Vegeta roared, knowing he had to face his biggest enemy yet- hormonal, teenage girls.

~*~

            "You stole a Mirai Trunks fan!" The girl spat, her eyes gleaming with anger.

            "What? The Vegeta table does not steal! Wait…that didn't sound right…" Gemma, a Vegetarian, stated.

            "Either way, TRF was on our table, then joined yours! That's stealing!" Another girl joined in.

            "Hey, I can make up my own mind! I don't know what I was thinking; Vegeta is way nicer than Trunks! Trunks is merely a boy, Vegeta's a man!" TRF defended herself.

            "What have they done to her?" A Trunks fan shrieked as the whole Trunks table gasped in shock.

            "We haven't done anything! Any _normal _girl can see the full extent of Vegeta's incredible hotness!" Nadia argued.

            "Don't worry, Trunks table, we know what it's like. That Vegeta lot are evil, just like him! They deserve to go to HFIL!" A member of the Goku table yelled.

            "At least we dare say 'hell', you Kakkarot losers!" Yoli grinned as the Goku table gasped at her use of 'hell'. "Hell, hell, hell, helly, helly, hell, hell, hell, helly, helly, hell!" Yoli chanted.

            "They're monsters!" Another member of the Goku table yelled.

            "Ingrates!" A Trunks member yelled.

            "Ingrates? We are not!" DarkAngel yelled indignantly. 

            "Vegeta's impotent!" A member of the Yamcha table called.

            "Uh oh." Members of the Chibi Trunks/Goten table uttered as DarkAngel flung a dish of bread rolls at the Yamcha table, the rest of the Vegetarians following suit.

            "Vegeta stole Bulma from our beloved Yamcha!" A Yamcha-fan accused.

            "Well he can have her back! She doesn't deserve the Prince of all Saiyans!" DarkAngel yelled, throwing a tub of special sauce at the Trunks table.

            "Noooooooooooooooo!" Yoli wailed, jumping onto the table and issuing a war cry. "This is for the special sauce!" She yelled, flinging pie at the Yamcha table. Unfortunately, her bad aim came back and it hit the Bardock table.

            "Who dares to throw pie at the Bardock shrine?" A girl screamed, throwing jelly at the Gohan table, which she assumed were the perpetrators. 

            "Goddamnit, we don't like the fact she's married to Gohan either!" A girl from the Gohan table yelled to the Videl table, thinking it was them who threw the jelly. The Gohan table returned the favour, throwing ice cream at the Videl table.

            "Eeep! Come on, Nadia, this is our chance to get those Kakkarot fools!" Yoli grinned evilly, taking a big bucket of grease from the kitchen and crawling under the tables, dodging the various foods flying around.

            "Follow closely, DA." Nadia motioned.

            "Wow, my first ever OFUD food fight! Spiffy!" DA exclaimed.

            "We usually win, except for them other times when the Gohan table won. They're very aggressive." Nadia informed.

            "Owww!" Yoli yelled.

            "Yoli!" Nadia and DA exclaimed in unison.

            "It's…OK…" Yoli breathed, wiping the ice cream that had landed on her chest away. "It was my time…go on without me…show those bastards whose boss…." Yoli panted heavily.

            "Yoli, it's just ice-cream." Nadia rolled her eyes at her melodramatic friend.

            "No…strength…loosing…battle to…live…" Yoli joked, feigning dying.

            "Come on!" DA urged as the tables had now resorted to throwing…*dun dun dun*…peas!

            "Damn, this is heavy…" Yoli grunted, as she lifted the bucket, ready to throw the grease on the unsuspecting Goku fans.

            "Right, I want you all to stop this! You three, stop right there!" A loud voice ordered.

            "Woah!" Yoli uttered, as the voice made her jump, causing her to spill the grease all over the unhappy figure.

            "I'm guessing you won't believe me when I say that it's customary to throw grease onto cool and spiffy people like you in our world?" Nadia asked hopefully.

~*~

            "Kill Goku, kill Goku." The girl chanted, whilst pouring the bright pink liquid into the empty bottles Nadia had kindly donated to her. "Soon, you fool, soon." The girl cackled. "Hey, I'm getting good at this evil laughing thing!" She said cheerily.

A/N2: Oooooo, spiffy food fight there! Damn, its times like these when I wish OFUD were real, if not to just shower everyone in special sauce. Anywho, just one thing to say before ending this chapter; IT'S JUST PORN, MUM. 


	47. Punishment

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey everyone! This is to all the people who emailed me; 'its just porn, mum' is the title of a song, and it was playing at the time so I just felt like shouting it out ^_^ Anywho, on with Chapter 48!

            "Heh…sorry, Goku." DarkAngel looked up at the menacing figure looming over them, grease dripping off of him.

            "I am Bardock. Really, it's not that hard."

            "Oh, sorry Bardock." DA apologised, smiling sheepishly.

            "Yeah, you look so much like that fool, Kakkarot, that we thought…" Yoli started.

            "Just insult the guy's son, nice one." Nadia hissed.

            "Grrr." Bardock emitted a low growl, then grabbed Yoli, Nadia and DA by their collars and hefted them out of the cafeteria. 

            "Hey, Sarya!" Yoli called. "Hey, what are you doing with that?"  
  


            "Doing everyone a favour by getting rid of Goku!" Sarya looked at Bardock and smirked. 

            "Damnit, why is it so hard? I have a scar for crying out loud!" Bardock rolled his eyes, dropping the three students in the process.

            "Stop making excuses, Goku, I'm not an idiot." Sarya took two bottles of the fizzy, pink liquid from her pockets and de-capped them.

            "What the hell is that?" Bardock narrowed his eyes.

            "Looks like cherryade to me, num!" Yoli grinned from where she was sat on the floor with DA and Nadia.

            "Well, it's not." Sarya said bluntly. "This, my friends, is the best substance ever. It is deadly to Saiyans."  
  


            "As in…kill deadly or gastric stomach pains deadly?" Nadia asked.

            "Kill Goku, kill Goku, kill Goku, kill Goku." Sarya chanted, approaching Bardock with the substance.

            "Hey, my friend asked you a question!" Yoli complained.

            "Yoli," Nadia looked at her friend "I get it. She wants to kill Kakkarot."  
  


            "Then whats the problem? No one likes him!"

            "Except the hoards of Kakkarot fans." DA offered.

            "And the fact that she thinks Bardock is Kakkarot." Nadia added.

            "My God, Burenda will kill me if she kills Bardock, or even worse, not do my homework for me! Move it!" Yoli stood up quickly, intent on disarming Sarya.

            "Die Goku, DIE!" Sarya wailed, throwing the bright pink substance over Bardock.

            "Is this supposed to be doing something?" Bardock asked, opening his eyes after a couple of minutes.

            "Well…technically, your body should've dissolved and I should be dancing to the wails of horror you should be emitting." Sarya narrowed her eyes. "Why the fuck aren't you wailing?"  
  


            "Wow, it's pink, yet there's no wailing. I usually find the two go hand-in-hand." Nadia commented.

            "Nooooooooooooo!" Yoli wailed, tackling Sarya to the ground with a loud 'oof'.

            "Yoli, you're late. Even if the damn thing worked, Bardock would be dead now." Nadia rolled her eyes.

            "He's not dead? That means I don't have to do my own homework? Once again, the world is saved by the gorgeous, intelligent, fearless Yoli!" Yoli grinned, taking on a 'holier-than-thee' pose.

            "I can't believe it didn't work! I knew I shouldn't have replaced the frogs' legs with baking soda." Sarya shook her head and walked away, mumbling about the prices of frogs' legs these days.

            "O…K. Well, follow me you three. Punishment time." Bardock grinned evilly.

            "Eh? Dude, I just saved your life!" Yoli complained. "And I mean 'dude' with the utmost respect for your status and leadership." She quickly added.

            "One; you couldn't save anyone's life even if you wanted to and two; I wasn't under threat from a female teenager obsessed with killing my son and some pink water." Bardock insisted, directing the three to Piccolo's AKA 'the master of punishment's' office.

            "No, not Piccolo!" Nadia whined. "But he makes us write realistic stories!"  
  


            "What?" DarkAngel gasped in horror.

            "No original characters, no unusual couplings and no…no…" Yoli burst into tears.

            "There, there." Nadia comforted her friend. 

            "No what?" DA was afraid to ask.

            "Lemons." Nadia said, causing Yoli to burst into more tears.

            "Have fun." Bardock said, leaving the three terrified girls waiting outside the office.

            "Not you two again. What's this, you've corrupted a fellow student?" Piccolo looked at DA.

            "Nope, I was corrupted before meeting them!" DA stated proudly.

            "Yup, she's like a second arm or leg…except she isn't." Yoli looked confused at her own comment.

            "Great." Piccolo muttered, then a light bulb flashed above his head and he grinned widely, showing his sharp canines.

            "Ooooo, a light bulb! Can I touch it?" Nadia asked, reaching out.

            "No!" Piccolo barked, causing Nadia to snatch back her arm. "Come in, come in."

            "You sound happy, Piccolo. Whats wrong?" DA asked, seriously concerned.

            "Nothing." Piccolo said breezily, causing the three girls to gulp as they sat at their desks.

            "So…whats on the agenda today? Write an action story with actual fight scenes in?" Nadia asked, wrinkling her nose at the thought.

            "Yeah, hurry up so we can get on with the torture. Mr Piccolo, green Namek, sir." Yoli quickly added.

            "How would you girls feel about writing a lemon?" Piccolo smirked as the girls' faces faulted.

            "OK Piccolo, stop screwing with us." Nadia rolled her eyes.

            "I'm not. Which couplings would you care to write about? A different one each time, please. Oh, no original characters, though."

            "Uh…I'll take Vegeta/Bulma." Nadia grinned. "Hey, I can pretend its me!"

            "Oooo, can I do a Gohan/Piccolo?" Yoli asked hopefully.

            "A…a…a…what?" Piccolo demanded.

            "Nevermind. I'll do Gohan/Mirai Trunks instead."  
  


            "And I'll do…ah…um, Eighteen/Krillan." DA said.

            "Very well. You have an hour." Piccolo smirked as he gave out sheets of paper.

            "Oh yeah, gotta love the bonding plot." Nadia smiled, as she began to scribble down a lemon.

~*~ (An hour later)

            "All finished to satisfaction?" Piccolo asked sweetly, his voice dripping with honey. (A/N: Scary thought!)

            "Yep." The three girls chorused, handing in their signed work.

            "Good." Piccolo shifted through the hot and kinky lemons, smirking. "Now, we'll be off to the staff room for your punishment."

            "Eh?" Yoli asked loudly.

            "Uh…wasn't that our punishment?" DA asked naively.

            "Yeah, it was sooooooo horrible!" Nadia feigned.

            "No, I believe Vegeta, Bulma, Gohan, Mirai Trunks, Eighteen and Krillan are there right now, waiting to hear your masterpieces read out by the authors themselves!" Piccolo smirked. Oh, he's good.

            "Fuck, I'm dead." Nadia cursed her fruitiness.

            "Uh…mine wasn't so much a lemon, it was more like a lemon tree…"

            "But in mine they overcome Krillan's impotence!" DA wailed.   


	48. Cell Crow

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Yo peoples! How be everyone? Yo, S'rac, who's ya fave DBZ character?  Oh yeah, even though ma MSN keeps screwing up *grumbles* you can still email me ^_^ I don't mind!

Quorky: Why do you insist on constantly torturing me with your inconsistent ramblings of how lonely you are?

I never said I was lonely, so nerr! Evil monkey!

Quorky: I'm not evil, just well educated :p

My God, you are so egotistical *gasps* Quorky, stop infecting me with your braininess!

Quorky: Infected…sounds about right for you…

            "Uh…I can't read…" Nadia said, as she stood in the middle of the staff room.

            "Nonsense, you read beautifully! I'm sure this story will be thrilling!" Piccolo smirked from the corner of the room.

            "In more ways than one." Nadia muttered.

            "What are we doing here?" Vegeta demanded impatiently.

            "Piccolo said they've been writing romance stories about us. How sweet." Bulma cooed.

            "Hmph. Romance is not 'sweet'." Vegeta muttered, pissed that he was missing training, or sparring, or training for sparring,

            "Uh…well, this is called 'The Mating Ritual'." Nadia gulped as Bulma and Vegeta raised their eyebrows. 

            "Wait!" Yoli interrupted. "I am not gonna read this out! Two half Saiyans are not going Super on my arse!"

            "Yeah, and Krillan may be bald…"

            "And impotent." Piccolo grinned.

            "Piccolo!" Krillan whined. "You promised!"

            "Woo, I was right!" DA cheered.

            "Excuse me?" Krillan asked.

            "I think I want to hear this." Vegeta glared at Nadia.

            "Heh, no ya don't." Nadia giggled.

            "Yes, we do." Mirai Trunks stood up.

            "I think you'll be interested in her paper, Trunks." Piccolo pointed to Yoli.

            "_Hey Gohan, wanna see my sword? Trunks asked his long-time friend, the sexual tension finally getting to him.' _Sexual tension?" Mirai Trunks demanded, after reading out the paper.

            "Let me…oh dear Dende, no." Gohan looked like he was going to vomit.

            "Yoli, how could you use the 'sword' line?" Nadia asked.

            _"'Onna, I want you. I need you.' Brat!" Vegeta roared, shaking with rage._

            "Hey, Vegeta, she wasn't too far from the truth then." Bulma laughed.

            "Onna, I did **not **beg you!" Vegeta roared.

            _"'Don't worry, Krillan, I understand. You're not physically up to the challenge, I just can't help feeling it's my fault.'" Eighteen's voice got gradually louder with each word from anger. "Krillan's 'problem' is not my fault!"  
  
_

            "Hey guys, it was just a little lemon…" Yoli said, backing to the door.

            "I was being imaginative, like Piccolo told us to!" DA sent Piccolo a glare as she backed up with Yoli.

            "Hey, Bulma said I wasn't too far off." Nadia beamed proudly. "Huh? Guys, wait!" She wailed as the door opened and the two girls ran for their lives, Nadia not far behind.

            "You perverts!" Bulma shrieked as they all followed the three students, Piccolo standing back and laughing.

            "I would _never use that pick-up line!" Mirai Trunks shouted._

            "I did not beg her!" Vegeta added.

            "It's not my fault!" Eighteen roared.

            "Quick, in here!" Nadia said breathlessly, flinging open her dorm room door and bundling inside.

            "Phew." Yoli panted, slamming the door behind her and proceeding to pile wardrobes and desks up against it.

            "Guys, how did we manage to out-run three Super Saiyans, an android, the strongest human in the world and a weirdo that can't cook?" DA asked.

            "No idea." Nadia breathed.

            "Hey, this is OFUD, anything could happen." Yoli commented, pushing a bed up against the door.

~*~

            "Ha, found you!" J'dee yelled triumphantly from where she was sat on the large figure below her.

            "Whats the meaning of this?" The black blob asked.

            "I wanna know why I have your jacket instead of Yamcha's!"  
  


            "My jacket! I've been looking for it everywhere! Vegeta said…" Mr Popo began.

            "Grrr. That stupid Saiyan! Coming between me and Yamcha's coat!" J'dee growled.

            "Uh…can I have my coat back?"

            "Yes, take it!"  
  


            "Uh…can you get off me, please?" Mr Popo asked.

            "Not until you tell me what the 'B' stands for." J'dee grinned.

            "'B'?" Mr Popo asked in confusion.

            "Yes, on the tag it says 'Mr B. Popo." J'dee said.

            "Oh 'B' is for…for…Bill, yes Bill." Mr Popo said, sounding happy with himself.

            "Do I look stupid? Wait…don't answer that. Really, what is it?" J'dee inquired.

            "It took Dende longer than this to get it out of me." Mr Popo sighed.

            "Aw, thanks!"  
  


            "Its Burdïohemperluckishfeughroud." 

            "Pardon?" J'dee blinked a couple of times.

            "Burdïohemperluckishfeughroud."

            "Your name is Bur…Bur…uh, what you just said Popo?"

            "Yes, Mr Burdïohemperluckishfeughroud Popo." Mr Popo sighed.

            "Hahahahahahahahaha! How the hell do you manage to say that, let alone spell it?" J'dee burst into fits of laughter.

            "Years of practice." Mr Popo shook his head sadly.

            "Awwww, poor Mr Popo." J'dee said sympathetically before promptly bursting into laughter.

            "Stop laughing." Mr Popo said sourly.

            "Aw, I'm sorry Burd…Bur…how the hell do you say it?" J'dee laughed.

            "Bully." Mr Popo muttered.

A/N2: SeaStorm just sent me this URL; http://www.geocities.com/torro_chan/CellCrowHybrid.jpg

If you hate Cell, go there! It is too funny! If you're a big fan well…um…try not to let your curiosity get the better of you .


	49. The Legends Of VITB And The Sacred Carro...

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Damn, last chapters ending was so…so…bland, I apologise. Oh, and sorry to those who thought the previous chapter was so short, which is why I've written this straight away. Then again, this isn't that long anyway. Just think of it as a whole chapter split into two or something. Anywho, Chapter 50;

            "Costume party at dorm 14L!" Nadia called in the corridor, posting up flyers.

            "Wow, this is gonna be so cool!" DA commented, sticking a flyer over a fire alarm.

            "I know!" Jeril grinned, who was helping out.

            "Is this allowed? I mean, did you ask permission?" S'rac, a friend of DA's, asked.

            "Uh…permission?" Nadia looked confused. "Um…not really, but its our dorm, right?"

            "Exactly!" DA said.

            "Won't people notice it, though?" Jeril asked.

            "Hey, we can't get done, Vegeta's gonna be their!" Nadia pointed to the part of the flyer that said 'Special Guest: Super Hunk, Super Saiyan, Super Yummy Vegeta.' for extra emphasis.

            "Well I'm there!" Jeril said gleefully.

            "Me too." S'rac added.

            "Great, all you need is costumes!"

~*~

            "Hurry, Nadia!" Yoli prodded her friend, who was lying on her bed.

            "What? I've just posted a thousand flyers, and I'm tired!" Nadia moaned.

            "Emergency V.I.T.B meeting!" Yoli rummaged around for her shoes.

            "Are we finally gonna change the name? 'Vegeta Is The Best' just seems so…bland." Nadia made a face as she put on her trainers.

            "Hopefully. Apparently, we need to get back at the G.I.T.B club, they've done something really bad. According to Vega, anyway." 

            "Besides, the name is just too much like the Kakkarot's club name. I mean, 'Vegeta Is The Best' and 'Kakkarot Is The Best', it sounds like we're allies." Nadia said, still hung up about the name.

            "C'mon." Yoli ushered Nadia out of the dorm room, locking it behind them. They approached the stair case, then walked backwards exactly five steps. Then they turned clockwise 270 degrees, tapped on the wall twice and crawled through the opening that had appeared.

            "Please state your business." A robotic voice demanded, once they had reached the club's doorway.

            "Emergency meeting called to defend our Prince against _that_ third-class baka. Vegeta fan 1008 and 1023 reporting." Yoli called through the intercom.

            "Quote for the thousand realm, please." The voice referred to the traditional quote that each 'realm' had to recite. The quote differed, depending on whether it was the unit, ten, hundred or thousand realm. (ie. 0009, 0027, 0376, 3456)

            "'I am a warrior, not a variety of flower.'" Yoli recited.

            "Access approved." The robotic voice came, accompanied by a loud 'swish' noise as the doors opened.

            "Hey guys!" Nadia called as she saw that the whole club were already seated in their traditional 'V' shape.

            "Hi, 1008 and 1023, take your seats please." Vega, the club founder and oldest student in OFUD, greeted.

            "So, what have those fools done now?" Yoli demanded, herself and Nadia taking a seat next to Jeril.

            "Wait a minute…where's the shrine?" Nadia demanded, an ugly thought entering her head.

            "Yes, it is true." Vega sighed. "I was waiting for you two to arrive before telling everyone. As 1023 pointed out, G.I.T.B have stolen the sacred shrine."  
  


            "What?" Yoli demanded, amid lots of gasps and curses.

            "But…but…the shrine has been here since the beginning of OFUD, along with Vega-sama! This is an outrage, the shrine has never been moved! Who knows what experiments they're conducting on the shrine right this moment!" Jeril commented.

            "I am aware of all these points, 1942." Vega sighed. "The shrine contains every picture, clip, figurine and other merchandise based on our Prince. We even had the bubble machine! I am not sure what the G.I.T.B's will have done. They are very unpredictable at these times, I will give them that." Vega shook her head.

            "I won't stand for this!" Nadia got out of her chair. "_We _won't stand for this!"

            "Yeah! I may have only been here a month, but it is a disgrace to us all to have a G.I.T.B even look at the shrine, let alone steal it!" DA stood up.

            "There's only one way to get even." Yoli smirked. "I say we go undercover. A few of us can resort to being a…a…G.I.T.B." Yoli paused as the members gasped at her proposal. "And we get the shrine back, it is the only way. We must make sacrifices for our Prince!" Yoli grinned as the members cheered. "Once we have the shrine, we will take their sacred carrot, and make them a nice carrot soup as a peace offering!"

            "Yeah!" Nadia cheered.

            "That is an excellent idea." Vega grinned. "Thank you for both volunteering, you are truly V.I.T.Bs."

            "Woah, I didn't say anything about volunteering!" Yoli said hurriedly.

            "No, we'd have to sit at the Kakkarot table and call him G…G…Go…Gok…Gokewer, I can't even say it!" Nadia protested.

            "That's a shame." Vega smiled. "I'm sure there'd be a huge reward in it."  
  


            "Like being Vice-presidents?" Yoli asked hopefully, her eyes gleaming.

            "And more." Vega smiled.

            "Well…" Nadia and Yoli looked at each other. "We'll do it!"

            "Good." Vega smiled as the members cheered. "Let's celebrate."

~*~      

            "Oh, hey Joe! Hows it going?" Nadia greeted her friend, who had visited her dorm.

            "Hey guys! I've been thinking…"

            "Woah, don't strain yourself." Yoli joked, from where she was sat on the bed next to Sai.

            "Haha." Joe stuck his tongue out at Yoli. "I think its time we went on a school trip!"

            "Why? They're soooo boring!" Sai said.

            "Yeah, and they make us learn stuff!" Yoli added.

            "What if it wasn't boring, and we learnt nothing?" Joe asked excitedly.

            "Well, I'd say that's almost as good as forgetting something we'd learnt!" Yoli grinned.

            "But where the hell can this trip take place?" Nadia asked.

            "We can go camping!" 

A/N2: Woah, lotsa things happening now! Wow, that V.I.T.B club is freaky! Fun, but freaky! Poor Nadia and Yoli, having to be Go…Go…Go…Gok…Kakkarot fans .


	50. Walk Like A Kakkarot Fan, Talk Like A Ka...

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Ack, first I kept pondering whether Vegeta wears socks, now I'm wondering if he likes bananas *shrugz* it's a mystery. Anywho, here's Chapter 51;

            "Camping? Last time I went camping, it rained! I was stuck in the company of my dad and brother in the rain, in the middle of nowhere. Camping is not fun!" Nadia looked at Joe as if he'd just grown another head.

            "Maybe it's not fun with your family, but have you ever been camping with the Z team?" Joe grinned.

            "Oooo, spiffy idea! You are the shiznick!" DA complimented.

            "Psssh, I doubt Skittles will want to come camping with us. But I can dream." Yoli said wistfully.

            "No, but Kakkarot may agree to it." Nadia smirked devilishly.

            "Speaking of that baka, when are you going undercover?" DA asked.

            "Undercover?" Joe looked confused.

            "Me and Yoli have the privilege of going undercover as Kakkarot fans to get back our Vegeta shrine and steal their sacred carrot." Nadia informed.

            "Right…" Joe nodded along.

            "In fact, we're supposed to be undercover now! We can practise on the way to the Games Room, that's where Jeril, J'dee, S'rac and the rest will be, we can tell 'em about Joe's camping idea!" Yoli said, ushering them out of the room.

            "So, can you pronounce Kakkarot's earth name yet?" DA asked.

            "Um…you mean the whole name or just the first two letters?" Nadia sighed. "It's really hard!"

            "Yeah! I feel like I'm betraying Skittles." Yoli said unhappily.

            "Yoli," Joe started. "You are."

            "Yeah, but it's to help him!" Yoli defended.

            "That's what the cheating wives say on them chat shows." DA commented.

            "We're evil, evil girls. Committing adultery like this." Nadia shook her head ruefully.

            "Hey guys." J'dee greeted, slightly glancing up from the screen, where Jeril was beating S'rac on 'DragonBall-Final Bout'.

            "Ha! Super Vegeta always wins, especially against Kakkarot!" Jeril did a little victory dance. "Oh, hey guys. You finally managed to say Kakkarot's earth name yet?"

            "What is it with you people? Are you trying to mock my adultery committing self-existence? Well it's working!" Yoli screamed, grabbing her pigtails and pulling on them. "Self inflicted pain is only the beginning."

            "Yoli…chill." Joe tried calming down the hysterical girl.

            "What's with her?" S'rac whispered.

            "She's upset 'cos we're adulterers." Nadia shook her head.

            "You have a boyfriend?" J'dee asked in shock. "Why wasn't I informed of this?"

            "No, we mean against Vegeta!" Nadia explained. "Becoming a Go…Go…Goku…oh my God, I said it!" She didn't know whether to be happy or sad.

            "Said what?" S'rac asked in confusion.

            "Goku! I said it again!"

            "Look at her! At least I _try_ and keep my infidelity a secret!" Yoli hissed, now she had stopped pulling her hair. "Whore."

"Yoli, chill! Remember, we're undercover! Think of it as being cruel to be kind!" Nadia coaxed her friend.

            "Yeah, we'll show them Goku freaks!" Yoli gasped. "I said it aswell! Now I'm a whore!" She screamed, causing everyone in the Games Room to stop and stare. "Heh, and I mean that in the most dignified way!"

            "Anyway, back to why we came here?" DA tried to get the conversation moving along.

            "Oh yeah, Joe's been thinking!" Yoli pointed at Joe proudly.

            "Are you sure that's a good thing?" S'rac joked.

            "Hell yeah! He said we should go camping!" DA exclaimed.

            "Camping? But it's so dirty!" Jeril complained, snarling at two boys who tried to pry the control pad from her hand.

            "But camping with the Z team promises to be fun." Joe added.

            "Oooo, maybe I can share a tent with Yamcha!" J'dee grinned at the possibilities this trip would create.

            "But, we must all harass…Goku, and cause him to allow us to take this trip either out of guilt or stress." Nadia tried out the 'new word' that had been added to her vocabulary.

            "Yeah!" Yoli cheered, causing everyone to, again, stop and stare at her. "Damn, you'd think you lot had never seen a whore get excited before!"  
  


~*~

            "Hi Goku." Nadia smiled sweetly as she caught the Saiyan in, where else (?), the kitchen. 

            "Uh…shey!" Goku greeted, his mouth full of cream and an unidentified green substance.

            "Yeah, we're pretending to be this guy's fans…why?" Yoli whispered to Nadia.

            "All in the name of our Prince." Nadia shot back, returning to smiling sweetly.

            "Goku, we were wondering…" J'dee began.

            "If you'd prove to be the nice, kind, brave…" Joe took over.

            "I'm gonna puke." Jeril muttered, scowling at Goku. 

            "Um, did we mention kind? Kind Saiyan you are thought to be and take us camping?" Yoli asked.

            "Camping?" Goku swallowed his food.

            "Ya know, tents, open fires, marshmallows?" Nadia inquired.

            "Marshmallows? Yum! 'Course we can go!" Goku smiled as everyone began to cheer.

            "OK, spiffy!" Nadia grinned. "Uh…invite the others."  
  


            "Others?" Goku looked confused.

            "Ya know…Vegeta, and them other guys who just stand around and watch our Prince in all his glory." Nadia's face took on a distant look.

            "Ecksnay on the we-love-Skittlesay, comprendre?" Yoli nudged her friend.

            "Huh? Oh yeah! We mean invite that baka Vegeta, mmmmm Vegeta, and the others. Green man, your offspring, baldy, three eyes and the doll- thing." 

            "Oh, OK!" Goku smiled.

            "Oh, and don't forget tents!" Joe shouted after Goku as he left.

            "I think I handled being a Goku fan pretty well!" Nadia boasted, dusting off her hands.

            "You mean you were being a Goku fan then?" S'rac asked. "Damn, you two need some work!"  
  


            "Hey, I was practically civil to him!" Yoli moaned.

            "Come on, let S'rac show you how being Goku obsessed is done!"

~*~

            "We have to smile at him?" Nadia asked in disgust.

            "Frequently." S'rac nodded.

            "This is like work!" Yoli complained. "Except harderer! Eeep, I'm becoming incoherent from boredom!"

            "I suppose we can finish for today." S'rac sighed. "I guess you two don't want that shrine back as much as I first thought."

            "We do!" Nadia and Yoli exclaimed.

            "Then concentrate!"  
  


            "He's mean when he's on a power trip!" Yoli whispered.

            "I think it's attractive." Nadia smirked.

            "You're thinking about being unfaithful again! Stop being a whore!" Yoli hissed.

            "Calm down Yoli, I was just saying." Nadia rolled her eyes.

            "Now, when he or anyone else mentions his status as the strongest fighter…"

            "You liar, Skittles is the strongest! Don't make me come over there!" Yoli screeched.

            "You can't over-react…_like that_!" S'rac shook his head. "Now, when Goku displays naïve or 'cute' acts, what do we do?"

            "Smile?" Nadia asked lazily. 

            "Example." S'rac watched as Nadia and Yoli envisioned Goku being 'cute' and tried to refrain from sneering and managed to turn it into a smile. Well, a grimace, but it was good enough for now. "Excellent, perhaps next time you could add a little 'aw' or 'ah'. Now, what do we do when he shakes your hand or places a hand on your shoulder?"

            "He actually touches you?" Yoli asked in disgust.

            "Gross!" Nadia exclaimed, revolted at the thought.

            "This is gonna be a long day." S'rac sighed.

A/N2: Hey guys, this is my last update before I go on holiday, so I'll see you when I get back! I hope to see a lot of reviews, and maybe I'll update sooner than intended! (Ah, bribery, the only way)


	51. Happy Birthday, Yoli!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic, nor do I own any alcoholic beverages mentioned or the songs 'I Want You Bad' by The Offspring, 'Tainted Love' covered by Marilyn Manson and 'Broken' by Bad Religion.

A/N: Hey everyone, I'm back and uploading already! I've only been back 2 hours, you lucky people. Here's Chapter 52 for your reading pleasure;

            "Hello." Yoli looked at the Goku table warily.

            "Hi!" The students greeted enthusiastically.

            "Um…hey. I'm Nadia, this is Yoli and…"

            "Hi Nadia! Hi Yoli!" The Goku fans interrupted. 

            "As I was saying, we are new to being Goku fans." Nadia finished her sentence.

            "Aw, don't worry about it!" A girl with red hair said. "We have new members all the time! Want me to show you around?"

            "Psssh, why would I want a Kakk…"

            "What Yoli's trying to say is; we'd love it if you would!" Nadia interrupted, glaring at her friend. "Actually, we heard you had a…um…club."

            "Shush!" The girl hissed, looking around rapidly. "We don't want anyone knowing, especially those Vegetable-head freaks."

            "Why you…" 

            "Heehee, yeah." This time it was Yoli who interrupted Nadia. "So, could we look at the club?"

            "Um…sure. But you'll have to go blind folded, as you're new and all. The president of our club has this insane idea that a member from the Vegetable-head club may be in disguise or something." The red head rolled her eyes. "Talk about paranoia."

            "Yeah, weird." Yoli laughed uneasily.

            ""C'mon then." The girl took two blindfolds out of her pocket.

            "Wow, you have those on hand?" Nadia asked, the thought unnerving her slightly.

            "Yeah, we had a couple of new recruits last week, and these were the jeans I was wearing." The red head explained, tying the blindfolds around Yoli and Nadia and helping them out of their seats. She guided them out of the cafeteria, and up the dorm staircase, tapping on a panel in the wall on the opposite side of where the V.I.T.B club was- her movements eerily like Yoli and Nadia's the day before. Suddenly, someone covered Yoli and Nadia's ears so they couldn't hear anything.

            "Woah." Nadia blinked as her blindfold was removed.

            "Psssh, can anyone say 'obsession'?" Yoli scoffed, ridiculing the layout of the hidden club. Unbeknown to her, it was exactly the same as the V.I.T.B club, save the Goku life-size posters instead of Vegeta. The colour scheme was also different- being orange and dark blue as opposed to royal blue and white with gold trimmings. Everything was the same, yet different, down to the chairs, which were arranged into a 'G'. 

            "Look." Nadia nudged her friend, pointing to a corner of the room. A green light shone onto a glass cabinet from an overhead spotlight, illuminating the features of an average sized carrot dressed in an orange gi. The green leafs had been painted jet black and now stood up straight instead of flopping to the side. A cutout of Goku's face had been glued onto the front of the carrot.  
  


            "Hmph, it's not that sacred." Yoli sniffed. "More like scary."

            "The monsters!" Nadia hissed, shakily pointing to a cage hanging a few feet away from the sacred carrot. There, in the cage, was the Vegeta shrine- or what was left of it. The glass encasement had been smashed, leaving shards of glass scattered over the contents. Various figurines had been vandalised- either with snot green paint or black marker pens, sometimes both. The bubble machine had been emptied, it's contents long evaporated.

            "Right, that's it!" Yoli announced, rolling up her sleeves.

            "Yoli, patience." Nadia gave a wry smile as she glanced at, what was, the Vegeta shrine. "Revenge is a dish best served cold."

~*~

            "It doesn't feel right getting ready for a party when we still haven't done anything about the shrine!" Yoli complained.

            "I know." Nadia sighed. "Believe me, I want to do something but…"

            "Yeah right!" Yoli scoffed. "If I didn't know any better I'd say you were enjoying being a Kakkarot fan!" She spat; glad she could use 'Kakkarot' now they were in the safety of their own dorm.

            "Calm down girls!" Sai said, as she emerged from the bathroom in her 'Tribute To Trunks' costume.

            "Yoli, I am not a Kakkarot fan!" Nadia looked disgusted at the thought. "I can just wait for revenge! Just imagining their faces is enough to keep me going!"

            "I guess you're right, as always." Yoli smirked at her reflection. "How do I look?"

            "Wow!" Nadia and Sai said in approval.

            "You look so much like him, it's scary!" Sai commented.

            "Heehee, I know." Yoli adjusting her Saiyan armour. "Damn, this spandex rides so far up your arse I'm surprised Skittles doesn't walk bow-legged."

            "He must've practiced before first wearing it!" Sai laughed, tying back her long, now lavender, hair.

            "Hey guys, happy birthday!" DA hugged Yoli. "Woah, Yoli, you look the Shiznick!" She commented.

"Thanks!"

            "You too, Sai!" DA added. "Uh…Nadia…no offence, but what are you supposed to be?"

            "She hasn't got changed yet!" Yoli interrupted.

            "I don't have a costume!" Nadia muttered.

            "I'm sure we can do something about that!" DA smirked evilly as she pulled Yoli and Sai into a circle and began whispering.

~*~

            "Guys, I look like a freak!" Nadia looked down at her costume.

            "No you don't!" Sai insisted.

            "I bet no one else will come as what you are!" DA added.

            "Besides, it's too late to change, people are here!" Yoli commented, running to answer the door.

            "Happy birthday!" J'dee hugged Yoli and handed her present to her.

            "Thank you!" Yoli grinned. "You look great…uh, whatever it is you are."  
  


            "A communist!" J'dee said as she smoothed down her costume.

            "Of course." Yoli smacked her forehead.

            "I'll put the music on." Sai said, running over to the stereo she and Nadia had 'borrowed' from Tien.

            "I'll get it!" Yoli called, running to the door. "Hey SeaStorm! Thanks." She took the present SeaStorm, dressed as an angel, had handed her gratefully. "Yo S'rac!" Yoli spotted S'rac coming up the corridor.

            "Hey." S'rac smiled, handing her a present.

            "Spiffiness, presents galore!" Yoli added the present to her pile.

            "Happy birthday."

            "Thanks, Vegetto. Spiffy costume!" Yoli commented.

            "Thank you. Yours is great too." S'rac added.

            "Come in, come in. Eat, dance, drink. We 'borrowed' Roshi's 'secret' stash of alcohol." Yoli pointed to the crates at the back of the room. "I'll get it!" She called, as someone knocked just as she'd closed the door. "Skittles! What a pleasant sur…what's _he_ doing here?"

            "I thought I'd bring Kakkarot along for the festivities." Vegeta smirked evilly. "I know how much it means to you him being here."  
  


            "Hmph." Yoli crossed her arms and smirked. "Like my costume? Hey, what are you supposed to be?"

            "I am not 'supposed' to be anything. I _am _the Prince of all Saiya-jins." Vegeta narrowed his eyes as he pushed past Yoli.

            "What no present?" Yoli called after him. "What are _you_ grinning at?"

            "I got you a present!" Goku handed Yoli a badly wrapped object. "I came as Piccolo." He pointed to the green face paint and turban he was wearing.

            "Great." Yoli rolled her eyes, tossing the package onto the pile, but 'accidentally' missing it, causing it to roll onto the floor.

            "Hey Vegeta, you made it!" Nadia grinned, giving Vegeta a hug. "What are you supposed to be?"

            "Baka brat, get off me!" Vegeta hissed. "Hmph, I could ask you the same thing."

            "Oh, I'm a toothbrush." Nadia scowled as Vegeta burst into fits of laughter. "Say, Vegeta, do your teeth need cleaning?" She smirked at the thought.

            "Stay away from me, hentai." Vegeta went to the back of the room and sat down.

            "_I mean it, I need it. I want you bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. Bad, really, really bad_." Yoli sang along to The Offspring's 'I Want You Bad' as she walked up to Nadia and gave her a big hug. "I know you got Skittles to come, thank you."

            "No problem." Nadia grinned. "Besides, I don't mind having him in our dorm. What I wanna know is why Kakkarot is here." She glanced over at Goku, who was telling S'rac he looked familiar.

            "Skittles brought him as my 'present'." Yoli shook her head. "Ah well, he's here. How'd you manage that, though?"

            "Blackmail. I used the PowerPuff Girls footage we have of him." Nadia grinned, taking a drink of WKD.

            "Oooo, sneaky. I like it." Yoli laughed, as she went to answer the door and let more people in.

            "Hey, cool costume." Nadia said, as she approached S'rac.

            "Thanks." He smiled. "Uh…you too."

            "Yeah, toothbrushes are so cool." Nadia rolled her eyes.

            "Hey, no one else has the same costume." S'rac said, pointing to a group of girls who had all come as Piccolo and were each accusing Goku of copying.

            "Good point." Nadia laughed as the girls attacked Goku. 

            "Hows the whole 'Goku-fans' thing going?"

            "Oh, great!" Nadia said. "They did steal the shrine. You should've seen what they did to it! A mess, it was! I can't wait until I get revenge." She rubbed her hands together in glee.

            "_Hows that, he didn't know a thing about, making love to the kinda girl you read about_…yo, Nadia, lookies what Sai got me!" Yoli stop singing along as she spotted her best friend.

            "What is it?" Nadia asked, trying to stop Yoli from waving it about so she could see it.

            "It's a pen of Skittles! Look what happens when I click this butto…oh, hey Skittles!" Yoli stopped mid-sentence as she saw Vegeta walk over.

            "I wouldn't click that if I were you, brat." Vegeta hissed.

            "Wowness, we match!" Yoli commented, standing next to Vegeta to prove her point. "Matching 'His' and 'Her' costumes!"

            "Hmph, don't get any ideas." Vegeta muttered.

            "Oh, these ideas have been here awhile!" Yoli laughed.

~*~  
  


            "Aw, thanks DA!" Yoli hugged her friend as she opened the last present- a whisk.

            "In case Kakkarot wants a break from the frying pan." DA shot Goku an evil glare, causing him to gulp.

            "Oh, Skittles, it's our song!" Yoli squealed as 'Tainted Love' by Marilyn Manson came on. "Let's dance!"  
  


            "This is not 'our' song, it is not even my song. Hmph, you must be crazier than diagnosed to think I'd dance with _you_." Vegeta folded his arms and smirked, causing a lot of the girls in the room to sigh.

            "'Truth Or Dare'!" Someone shouted.

            "Yeah!"

            "Alright then, we'll play 'Truth Or Dare'." Nadia grinned evilly.


	52. No, Joe!

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 

A/N: Hey Joe, I know you probably didn't want to dress as Frieza (who would?) but I needed it to make this work. Hope you understand!

            "What's 'Truth or Dare'?" Goku asked, cramming some popcorn into his mouth.

            "A game." Yoli said to Goku coldly. _'Might aswell be mean to him while I can.'_ She thought.

            "Well, we go around the circle and choose truth or dare. Truth is where you are asked a question and have to answer truthfully, and dare is where you are dared to do something." Crow Mirror, who had come as Android 18, explained, once everyone had created a circle.

            "Thanks, Eighteen!" Goku grinned, mistaking the student for the real thing.

            "Uh…sure thing, Goku." Crow Mirror looked at Goku strangely, shaking her head.

            "Let's just play!" Yoli urged. "C'mon Skittles!"

            "Hmph, I am not taking part in some childish, immature, stupid…I'm in." Vegeta joined the circle reluctantly upon seeing Nadia waving the 'PowerPuff Girls incident' Polaroid's around.   

            "Here, there's a spot next to me." Yoli patted the spare carpet next to her, which she had rudely shoved people away from to make room.

            "Great." Vegeta rolled his eyes, sitting cross-legged next to Yoli. (A/N: Stuh-range mental picture there.)

            "I'll go first." Yoli grinned. "I'll take a dare, and I want Nadia to give it me." She gave her best friend a meaningful glare.

            "What?" Nadia asked, too wrapped up in her conversation with S'rac to realise Yoli was talking to her. "Oh…um yeah, I get you! I dare you to kiss Vegeta for one minute."

            "Now this is what I call a fifteenth birthday!" Yoli smirked, grabbing a-hold of Vegeta's neck and pulling him down to her lips before he could protest.

            "Idiot bitch of a brat!" Vegeta spluttered, pushing Yoli away from him.

            "OK…well, maybe one _second_." Nadia said sarcastically.

            "Aw, Skittles, are you blushing?" Yoli smirked.

            "No, that would be the heat from the blast I am powering to wipe you out." Vegeta spat.

            "Haha, very…oh." Yoli looked down at the bright ball of ki that was gathering in Vegeta's open hands.

            "Now, Vegeta, don't do anything stupid." Goku said, standing up.

            "Oh, fuck off, Kakkarot." Nadia rolled her eyes. "I'd rather get killed by Vegeta than have you saving me."

            "Yes, Kakkarot, it is a privilege to die by the hands of the oh-so-dreamy Saiyan Prince, who, might I add, tastes like chocolate-covered jelly beans." Yoli licked her lips.

            "Grrrr." Vegeta growled, getting into his 'my-blast-is-so-strong-it'll-kill-you-in-a-millisecond-then-I-will-dance-over-the-bloody-ashes-that-was-once-your-body' stance.

            "Frieza's alive!" Vegeta roared in astonishment, letting go of his attack.

            "Hey guys, sorry I'm…woah!" Joe's eyes widened as Vegeta's blast came hurtling over to him.

            "Wow, I'd expect some screams of anguish, or at least a moan in his uncomfortable state." Crow Mirror commented.

            "Well, he did a pretty good job on his costume, I'll give him that." Vegeta noted.

            "Skittles!" Yoli glared at Vegeta, before running over to see if Joe was all right.

~*~ (Now, with the magic of author power, we will see the end of that scene from a different angle!)

            "I am so late!" Joe groaned, balancing Yoli's present and card in one arm whilst grabbing his tail so he wouldn't keep falling over it. "Stupid costume store!" He cursed, looking at his Frieza-costume covered arms, which he had purchased for a ridiculous amount of money, as it was the only costume left. "That'll teach me for leaving things 'til the last minute." Joe shook his head. He didn't particularly like Frieza, who did? 'He' was a purple and white lizard that had a rather girlish voice, yet was referred to as male. Plus, 'his' sexuality had to be confirmed yet, not that Joe had anything against bi or homosexuals.

            "Hey guys, sorry I'm…woah!" Joe's eyes widened a considerable amount as a bright, white ball of light came hurtling towards him. His body felt as if it was on fire, then he hit the floor with a sickening 'thud', causing everything to go black.

~*~ (Joe's mind…a relatively scary place.)

            "Come here, pink bunny with Ian Holm's head as your fluffy tail." Joe coaxed to a rabbit that hopped past him. Joe followed the rabbit along the path of blue and pink jellybeans, the ones with the gooey centre, clicking his fingers to get the rabbit to come to him. Suddenly, the rabbit disappeared behind a tree that looked unmistakeably like a bag of 'Walkers Sensations' AKA 'Posh Crisps'. A gust of wind caused Joe to shiver involuntarily, causing him to realise he was standing in only his underpants and one fuzzy sock. A deep laugh echoed around Joe, causing him to shiver again, this time for a reason other than cold. He looked around rapidly, before the tree caught his eye. It was shifting into…Joe blinked a couple of times. It shifted into Vegeta, or rather _shrank._

"Are you scared?" Vegeta barked.

            "Y-y-yes." Joe looked confused.

            "Not nearly as much as you should be." 

            "Hey, you stole that line!" Joe accused.

            "I did not!" Vegeta replied indignantly.

            "Yeah, ya did! You stole it from 'The Lord Of The Rings'!" Joe insisted.

            "Oh, I guess you saw that. Damn." Vegeta swore, before returning to the task at hand. "Do you fear me, boy?"

            "Your height, or rather lack of it, and ability to wear spandex in any type of weather scares me, yes." Joe replied honestly.

            "Did you just call me small?" Vegeta demanded.

            "No, I only implied it." Joe smirked, temporarily forgetting why he was unconscious and having this freaky dream.

            "Right." Vegeta smirked. "Let's get the Care Bears out here!" The Saiyan Prince clapped his hands, causing a group of the 'Care Bears' to appear in all their sickly-sweet glory.

            "We like children!" A blue one said happily.

            "Let's sing!" A bright pink one walked over to Joe.

            "You monster!" Joe hissed at Vegeta.

            "Boy, do you like chocolate?" Vegeta asked, clapping again. Mountains of chocolate bars were showered over Joe and his new buddies. "Eat up!" Vegeta stood and watched the Care Bears force-feeding Joe the chocolate, smirking.

            "Gulup!" Was all Joe managed to get out, before the blue Care Bear rammed another bar down his throat.

~*~

            "Is he going to make it?" Nadia and Yoli stood quickly as the doctor entered the 'Relatives' room.

            "Its hopeful. Your son is in a deep coma." The doctor said to Yoli, who had bent the truth just a little.

            "Deep coma? How deep? Deep as in a hole, or an endless pit?" Nadia demanded.

            "Well, your brother suffered extreme temperature changes in a short time. Plus the blow to his head when he fell is also an addition to that. There is a chance that Joseph will leave the coma and be fine, you have my word that myself and my team will do anything to help him." The doctor informed.

            "But?" Yoli asked, knowing there had to be a 'but' in there somewhere.

            "There is a 56% chance that Joseph will awake and not have the use of his lower body," the doctor hesitated before continuing. "Or, he may never wake."

            "Dude, I saw this on ER last week!" Nadia commented. 

A/N2: Wowness, this chapter had some semi-serious stuff in it…then Nadia had to ruin my moment *growls*

            Anyways promoting Darkjourney's fic ... except he changed his name to **_neonatos_** so just look up the title "**The Depth of Reality**" Why should you read it? Well….it's good…plus myself, S'rac and J'dee co-write it with him. It is a DBZ/FF7 AU starring Yoli! Yup, the crazed bitch from OFUD is now let loose with Vegeta, Cloud AND Sepiroth- the lucky, lucky girl! Anywho, yeah, it's good so read…or else I'll set my goldfish on ya! 

On another note; people who I add to my fic because they want to be in it, then complain because I got a silly fact wrong like them, for example, eating lettuce when they are allergic to lettuce, must understand that they wanted to be involved and approached me. If they didn't specify they were allergic to lettuce, then that's their problem, not mine and I'd appreciate it if the sarcastic comments through email would stop over a couple of tiny mistakes. You risked being in this fucked up fic, so live with it!


	53. Dude, People Did 'It' At My Party? So No...

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 

A/N: Stuh-range stuff happening last chapter O.o Oh, and to avoid confusion, the Goku club is called 'G.I.T.B' but Vegeta fans refer to it as the 'K.I.T.B', for obvious reasons. Chapter 54;

            "Remind me why we're here?" Nadia asked, looking around at the small room that was now occupied with the majority of students they knew, in their costumes.

            "Because we are 'irresponsible, disappointing young women and the fact that you held a party without permission, drank alcohol and put a student in a coma is not acceptable behaviour'." Yoli quoted what Piccolo had said earlier.

            "Hey! It wasn't us, it was Skittles!" Nadia reminded her friend.

            "Yeah, but we couldn't incriminate my, I mean our, Skittles and risk the chance of him leaving the University!" Yoli added.

            "Good idea." Nadia high-fived her friend, just as Piccolo walked in.

            "I don't know what you two look so happy about." He said gruffly. "And you," Piccolo gestured to the other students. "Should be hating these two right now."

            "I don't, any excuse to visit my Juunana-gou." SeaStorm smiled gratefully at the two girls.

            "Well, that will soon change when you all get interviewed on what exactly happened at that party…_separately_."

~*~

            "What is this thing?" Nadia asked for the umpteenth time.

            "I've told you! Some 'animal', and I use that term loosely, Piccolo has given everyone present at the party to make sure we don't try and get our stories straight." Yoli explained.

            "Ugh, it's so ugly." Nadia looked down at the one-eyed, pondweed-green thing, that could only be described as a 'monster'.

            "I think it's cute!" Yoli patted the monster on the head. "I'm going to call you 'Skittles Junior'!"

            "If I was Skittles, I'd be offended." Nadia commented. "We're in." She grinned triumphantly, pocketing the screwdriver that had helped her break past the G.I.T.B alarm system.

            "Great!"

            "Um…won't that thing tell on us? As it's one of Piccolo's…uh…friends?" Nadia asked.

            "Nope, I've corrupted it already!" Yoli seemed proud at that fact.

            "Wow, a record in only an hour and forty-six minutes!" Nadia checked her watch.

            "Skittles! What have they done to you?" Yoli wailed as she saw the Vegeta Shrine once more.

            "Come on, there's nothing we can do for it now." Nadia shook her head sadly, the thought of revenge keeping her going.

            "You're right." Yoli sniffled as she tore her gaze away from, what was once, a shrine.

            "Now, Kakkarot, how do you like blenders?" Nadia and Yoli cackled evilly as they approached the Sacred Carrot.

~*~

            "That's the last of it." Yoli washed her hands thoroughly, getting rid of the orange stains the carrot had left behind.

            "Dude, that was a big carrot!" Nadia stated, looking at what they had made, a tub of carrot soup and some leftover carrot juice.

            "Here's a good Skittles, you eat that evil Kakkarot!" Yoli gave her monster some soup, which he gobbled down straight away.

            "C'mon, lets get this down to the cafeteria!" Nadia grinned maliciously, putting the bowls and mugs onto a serving trolley.

~*~

            "Hi guys!" Nadia greeted, her voice sickly-sweet.

            "Hey!" The chorus of replies came from the Goku table.

            "Want some soup and juice? It's carrot, your favourite!" Yoli grinned, handing the soup and juice to everyone.

            "Mmm, this is delicious!" A girl who had taken a spoonful of soup commented. "I bet the carrot was a Class A!"

            _'These guys sure know a lot about carrots.'_ Nadia looked at the fans as if they had grown another head._ 'Weird.'_

"Actually, it's not Class A." Yoli grinned evilly, running what she was about to say next through her mind. "It's a third class baka." She tried to stifle back the fits of laughter, but when Nadia started giggling she couldn't help herself.

            "Huh?" A girl with pink hair asked, more than slightly confused as to why the two girls were in hysterics.

            "Well, the carrot we used to make all that stuff," Nadia began to whisper, so all the fans were craning their necks to hear. "Was the Sacred Carrot." 

            "What?" A shrill shriek demanded.

            "You heard, you Kakkarot losers!" Yoli laughed, causing both girls to unzip their jackets and reveal the T-Shirts underneath which read 'Skittles' Bitch'.

            "You lied!" The blonde they had spoken to earlier accused.

            "The Kakkarot losers are smarter than we thought!" Yoli commented sarcastically.

            "Anyways, losers, we gotta go. Bon appetite!"

~*~ (Deputy Head's Office AKA Piccolo's)

            "Please, take a seat." Piccolo said sarcastically as Yoli was called into the room and immediately sat down.

            "Uh…I already have…" Yoli said, a look of genuine confusion crossing her features. 

            "Don't get smart with us!" Piccolo barked.

            "Coolness, you called me smart!" Yoli's face lit up. "So, gentlemen, what was so urgent you felt the need to call upon me for this meeting?" She asked in a formal voice, considering Piccolo's earlier comment.

            "This is regarding the party you had last night." Seventeen informed. "Why didn't you invite us?"

            "Sorry guys, it's just I was trying to keep it a secret from you so if I invited you, you would've…oh bollocks." Yoli smacked her head.

            "Ah, so you did have a party!" Piccolo chuckled. 

            "Party? I'd say more of a little get-together. A little music, tea, biscuits…" Yoli trailed off.

            "You mean drugs, alcohol and sex!" Seventeen accused.

            "What?" Yoli looked shocked. "People had sex at _my_ party? I should be the only person to have sex at my party cos it's my party! Why didn't I have sex at my party?" Yoli demanded. "Skittles was there too! I blew the perfect opportunity!"  
  


            "Vegeta was there?" Piccolo asked, suddenly very interested.

            "Uh no…I said 'Skittles', as in the candy." Yoli covered up. 

            "You wanted to have sex with Skittles the candy?" Seventeen asked in disgust.

            "Yes." Yoli said miserably. _'The things I do for that incredibly fine Saiyan.' _"Especially the purple ones. They turn me on in ways you can only imagine."

            "Uh…I think you can go." Piccolo looked at Seventeen to verify it. "Yes, you can go."

            "Thanks!" Yoli grinned, getting up to leave. 

            "I think I'll put you down for some counselling, perhaps psychiatric care. You're obsession with Skittles seems almost inhuman." Seventeen commented.

            "Dude, you have no idea how obsessed! I have pictures over my wall, a desktop on my computer and I dream about my Skittles every night! Mmmm, Skittles." Yoli said, before leaving.

            "That girl needs serious help." Piccolo commented.                                

            "Yeah, the way she spoke about this candy named Skittles made me feel as if it was almost a real person!"

~*~ (The Deputy Head's Office AKA Piccolo's Office- Nadia's turn)

            "Care to tell us about what took place last night, Nadia?" Seventeen asked.

            "Last night? Well, I had a kick ass dream involving Skittles, myself, Sean William Scott and a hot tub." Nadia offered.

            "That's not what we meant." Seventeen shuddered involuntarily.

            "Not what we meant at all." Piccolo looked disgusted.

            "We were referring to what happened in your dorm, and how that came about."

            "The party, in other words. Admit it, you were having a party! Then it all got a little out of hand. A student is critically injured because of that party!" Piccolo accused.

            "Party? What party?" Nadia feigned innocence.

            "It's OK, Nadia. No ones blaming you for hurting Joseph…" Seventeen soothed.

            "No, just for putting the nails in his coffin!" Piccolo commented.

            "Guys, do you really think this whole good guy/bad guy thing is gonna work? Dude, they've used it over fifteen films, three short series and even an episode of 'The Simpsons!'" Nadia shook her head. "I expected better from you two."

            Piccolo glanced at Seventeen before saying, "You can go."

            "Were we really that obvious?" Seventeen asked, once Nadia had left.

            "I thought we were rather good, myself." Piccolo replied.

            "Yeah, that kid has no idea what she's on about."

A/N2: Today is August 30th, 2002. Yes, I can tell already that the date strikes fear into your hearts-the new school year starts soon. Unfortunately, as this will be my first year doing GCSE's, I won't be able to deliver a new chapter every other day, as I usually do. Instead, it's been restricted to **at least** once a week. I want to keep this fic going and I still have another semester to go after this, not forgetting a possible sequel, so I will still be updating. Thanks

            Anyways promoting Darkjourney's fic ... except he changed his name to **_neonatos_** so just look up the title "**The Depth of Reality**" Why should you read it? Well….it's good…plus myself, S'rac and J'dee co-write it with him. It is a DBZ/FF7 AU starring Yoli! Yup, the crazed bitch from OFUD is now let loose with Vegeta, Cloud AND Sephiroth- the lucky, lucky girl! Anywho, yeah, it's good so read…or else I'll set my goldfish on ya! 


	54. Coma Joe

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 

A/N: Hello all! How've you been? Well, a Camping Trip is coming up soon, and for all those who've wanted to get into OFUD, now's your chance! Just send an email stating the name you want used, age, vital stats (eye/hair colour, height, clothing), personality and your favourite DBZ character to staceytitch@aol.com. Here's Chapter 55;

            "You have both done an excellent job. You are true members of V.I.T.B. Accept these limited addition T-shirts and quote boxes as a sign of our gratitude." Vega handed Yoli and Nadia a T-shirt each, the caption basically reading 'Vegeta' as it needed nothing else, and an image of the Prince himself, in his Galick Gun stance. The quote boxes were tiny plastic boxes, which doubled as key rings and would emit a random Vegeta quote at the touch of a button. All the members of the V.I.T.B club applauded as Nadia and Yoli returned to their seats. "Now, for the real reason I have called you here today. As you all know, I am not getting any younger, I am almost seventeen. So, I have decided the time has come for me to leave OFUD."

            "But, Vega, why?" Gasps and cries came from the Vegeta fans upon hearing this announcement.

            "I have decided to travel the World. There is a life outside of OFUD, and I would like to experience it. Do not fear, my love for DragonBall Z, and especially Vegeta, has not wavered. They will hold a very special place in my heart. Besides," Vega half-smiled. "I have decided to give someone else a turn at being president." More gasps rose from the crowd as they now realised they had a chance to become president of the infamous V.I.T.B club. "Please begin campaigning, as I will be announcing the winner at the end of next week, so you don't have much time left!"

~*~

            "V.I.T.B Club?" S'rac asked in confusion.

            "Exclusive organisation based on the wonder that is Vegeta, Prince of the Saiyans." Nadia explained.

            "Ah." 

            "So, help me?" Nadia asked.

            "Sure. Where's Yoli?" S'rac asked.

            "I haven't told her yet." Nadia said, as S'rac raised his eyebrows. "I wanted it to be a surprise. I mean can you imagine how happy she'll be when I tell her I'm president of _the _V.I.T.B club? We could run it together! Assuming I win, of course." She stacked the printer with more paper as it printed out her campaign posters.

            "Well, the key to a good campaign is the slogan. Any ideas?" S'rac asked.

            "How about 'Vote Me…Then Go Pee'? It's advertising me as president _and_ reminding you to free up space in your bladder." 

            "Uh…leave the slogan to me." S'rac offered.

            "I was hoping you'd say that." Nadia grinned.

            "Now…colours?" S'rac asked.

            "Royal blue, white and gold of course!" Nadia looked disgusted at the thought of anything else.

            "Of course." S'rac rolled his eyes. "Now, what are you offering?"

            "Offering? Dude, I'm not campaigning to be a whore!" Nadia glared at S'rac.

            "Huh? No, I mean what can the voters expect from you!"

            "Oh…well, I can make a mean chocolate and fudge sundae." Nadia replied.

            "Right…culinary skills!" S'rac smirked in satisfaction. "Anything else?"

            "I'm a good listener."

            "Counselling experience. Perfect." S'rac typed this into the computer. "Now, can you rhyme anything with 'duck'?"

            "Fuck, suck, luck, truck, muck, puck, tuck, yuck." Nadia answered.

            "And undiscovered poet. I think that's all we need!" S'rac grinned, adding some final touches.

~*~

            "Hey Joe, how are you?" Nadia asked the motionless figure.

            "Dude, the nurse told you, he's in a coma! He won't reply!" Yoli stated matter-of-factly.

            "I know Yoli! But everyone talks to people who are ill, it's on TV all the time!"

            "Oh right." Yoli said thoughtfully. "Joe, did you have sex at my party?"

            "Yoli!" Nadia shouted.

            "Hey, I need to know! Well, did you?" She directed the last part to Joe.

            "Yoli, he wasn't there long enough." Nadia sighed.

            "Maybe he did it in the hall!" Yoli offered.

            "In a Frieza costume? Some how, I don't think so." Nadia shook her head. "Everyone misses you Joe."

            "Well, not everyone, cos not everyone knows you, and if someone didn't know you but missed you, then that'd be some freaky shit." Yoli laughed. "What?"

            "Nothing." Nadia snatched the balloon and flowers they had brought off Yoli before she could ruin them. "We got you some presents. And J'dee and S'rac said 'hi', I think they're visiting you tomorrow." 

            "I feel weird talking to a dead guy." Yoli shuddered.

            "Yoli! He is not dead!" Nadia shouted. "He's in a coma!"

            "Dude, it's the same thing!"

            "No, it's not."

            "Excuse me." A nurse peered around the door. "Visiting hours are now over."

            "OK." Nadia replied.

            "Nooo! You're not taking him! Not Joe! I know what you crazy nurses get up to!" Yoli screamed at the nurse.

            "Yoli, what the hell's wrong with you?" Nadia hissed at her friend, before saying to the nurse, "Don't mind her, she's on a lot of medication."

            "I watch TV, Nadia, I know what those freaky nurses and doctors do. Taking out a spare heart here and there, hoping no one will notice when my friend comes home without a heart! Well I will, lady, I will!" Yoli prodded the nurse in the arm, before stalking out of the hospital.

            "Heh…I'll see you tomorrow." Nadia grabbed her coat and hurried after her insane friend. 

            Anyways promoting Darkjourney's fic ... except he changed his name to **_neonatos_** so just look up the title "**The Depth of Reality**" Why should you read it? Well…it's good…plus myself, S'rac and J'dee co-write it with him. It is a DBZ/FF7 AU starring Yoli! Yup, the crazed bitch from OFUD is now let loose with Vegeta, Cloud AND Sephiroth- the lucky, lucky girl! Anywho, yeah, it's good so read…or else I'll set my goldfish on ya! 


	55. This Means War

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 

A/N: Ok, NO MORE ENTRIES! Dude, I got lots! Oh, and I think it's really weird that people who have never reviewed wanna be in OFUD. Wanna be in? **_Review!_** I have a star next to ya bio's and once you review it'll be taken away, meaning I'll put you in. Fair's fair. Oh, and don't worry if some of your fave characters are your second choices in OFUD, it's cos so many ppl love Vegeta (not surprisingly). By the way, it's **every Friday **I update**, **from now on. Here's Chapter 56;

            "I like it!" Nadia said, smoothing another poster onto a wall in the University.

            "Yeah, I thought 'Crazy, obsessed and in love with Vegeta? Then vote Nadia-she's just like you!' would catch the Vegeta fans' attention." S'rac informed.

            "Hmmm, interesting poster." Nadia said, before plastering her own over it. The poster that was there before was the shape of Vegeta and had blue lettering emblazoned across it, reading 'I'm In Love With _The _Prince, What More Do You Fucking Want?'.

            "Hey S'rac, Nadia." Jeril waved.

            "Hey!" They both greeted.

            "I didn't know you were campaigning." Jeril commented.

            "Yeah, I think it'll be fun."

            "Oh, well you definitely have my vote!" Jeril assured.

            "Thanks." Nadia smiled gratefully. "Wanna help?"

            "Sure." Jeril took some posters and got to work.

~*~  
  


            "Here Skittles, Skittles, Skittles." Yoli called as she paced down the Forbidden Corridor.

            "Can I help you, Miss Smelt?" Bulma asked, appearing from the Staff Room, her arms crossed and her foot tapping on the wooden floor.

            "Nope." Yoli gave a huge fake smile.

            "Then can you explain what you are doing up here?"

            "Looking for something." Yoli's eyes narrowed. "What's it to you?"

            "In case you have forgotten, I am a member of staff and should be treated with respect." Bulma hissed.

            "Respect should be earned." Yoli smirked.

            "Miss Smelt, I will advise you to apologise for that remark!" Bulma insisted, her face turning a deep shade of red.

            "Dude, if I wanted advice I would've bought one of those trashy magazines." Yoli huffed, turning on her heel.

            "Miss Smelt! Don't you dare walk away!" Bulma called after Yoli, who just kept on walking.

            "Stupid bitch." Yoli smirked as she left the Forbidden Corridor. "Here Skittles, Skitt-oof!" She fell over something and lay sprawled at the bottom of the stairs.

            "Meep!" Skittles Junior ran over to Yoli and licked her face.

            "Skittles, you shouldn't hide at the bottom of staircases!" Yoli scolded gently, before breaking into a grin. "Where've you been anyway?"

            "Meep meep!" Skittles Junior replied.

            "Really? I've trained you well!" Yoli got up and hugged her pet monster. "Did you give them Kakkarot losers a hard time?"

            "Meep! Meep meep!" Skittles Junior barked.

            "I can just imagine their faces!" Yoli laughed uncontrollably. "You've done well, my little Skittles." She stroked her monster affectionally.

            "Meep meep?" Skittles Junior asked.

            "I dunno, I haven't seen her for awhile." Yoli said thoughtfully. "Let's go find Auntie Nadia."

~*~

            "Hey Yoli!" Nadia greeted her friend as she entered the dorm. "Weren't you supposed to return that thing yesterday?"

            "Nadia! Skittles Junior is not a _thing_, he has feelings too ya know!" Yoli picked up Skittles Junior and hugged him. "I couldn't let him go, and Piccolo hasn't asked about him yet."

            "Ah right, sorry. Anyway, I'm glad you're back, I've got some exciting news for you." Nadia grinned.

            "Me too! I mean _I've_ got some exciting news for _you_, not you've got…ya know what I mean." Yoli insisted.

            "Yeah." Nadia laughed. "Let me go first."

            "Hey, what's that in your hand?" Yoli asked, spotting the paper.

            "Oh, well this has something to do with the news. I'm campaigning for president of V.I.T.B! This is a crappy poster I found, I mean, if _this_ is my competition, then I am sooooo gonna win! It'll be great! What do you think? Yoli? Yoli? You're looking a bit red…are you OK?" Nadia looked concerned.

            "Bitch." Yoli mouthed.

            "Eh?"

            "You utter and complete bitch!" Yoli roared, launching at Nadia.

            "Yoli! Yoli, what the hell?"

            "Bitch! You stole my idea! And my poster is _not _'crappy'!"

            "Meep." Skittles Junior shrieked in terror and hid under Yoli's bed.

            "Hey guys, what's-woah!" Sai exclaimed as she entered the room. "Stop it!"

            "This psychopath attacked me!" Nadia shrieked, gasping for breath.

            "She stole my idea!" Yoli accused.

            "Just calm down and tell me what happened!" Sai instructed.

            "I told her about me campaigning and…"

            "She stole my idea! I decided to campaign first!" Yoli yelled.

            "Uh oh…you're_ both_ campaigning for the V.I.T.B club, I assume?" Sai asked.

            "Yes, she stole my idea!" Yoli repeated.

            "I did not!_ You_ stole _my_ idea!" Nadia insisted.

            "She called my poster crappy!" Yoli yelled.

            "I didn't know it was yours! Besides, it _is_ crappy!" Nadia smirked.

            "Slut!" Yoli roared as she began pulling at Nadia's hair.

            "Takes one to know one!" Nadia screamed, grabbing hold of Yoli's hand.

            "Stop it!" Sai roared.

            "Bitch." Yoli hissed as she let go of Nadia's hair.

            "Wanka." Nadia hissed back.

            "C'mon guys, just apologise and make up like you always do." Sai pleaded.

            "No way!" Nadia shook her head.

            "Yeah, our friendship is over!" Yoli added.

            "This means war!" The two girls stared each other in the eye, before Nadia got up and stalked out.

            Anyways promoting Darkjourney's fic ... except he changed his name to **_neonatos_** so just look up the title "**The Depth of Reality**" Why should you read it? Well…it's good…plus myself, S'rac and J'dee co-write it with him. It is a DBZ/FF7 AU starring Yoli! Yup, the crazed bitch from OFUD is now let loose with Vegeta, Cloud AND Sephiroth- the lucky, lucky girl! Anywho, yeah, it's good so read…or else I'll set my goldfish on ya! 


	56. It's Just a Coincidence

 The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 

A/N: Yo people! Here is Chapter 57;

            "Ugh, I can't believe her!" Nadia ranted to S'rac.

            "I'm sure you'll make friends soon." S'rac said, getting bored of this conversation topic.

            "That's just it, I don't want to make friends!" Nadia made an impassive face as Yoli and a friend were approaching her.

            "Well, well, well, look what Skittles Junior dragged in!" Yoli smirked at her ex-friend.

            "Hmph, look indeed." Nadia looked Yoli up and down with a sneer on her face. "Who's this? Someone you bribed to be your friend?"

            "I don't need to bribe people to be my friends. Besides, I'm not the one who has the hots for a Kakkarot fan." Yoli looked at S'rac with disgust.

            "Hey, there's no need to bring me into this!" S'rac held up his hands in defence.

            "This," Yoli gestured to the boy standing next to her. "Is Nigel."

            "Hello." Nigel, who seemed foreign with his jet black hair and tanned skin, greeted.

            "He is a Skittles fan." Yoli added.

            "I admire Vegeta so much. Did you know Yoli's campaigning to be president of the V.I.T.B club?" Nigel asked.

            "I'd heard." Nadia said absent-mindedly. "Anyway, I best be off, goodbye Nigel."

            "Nice meeting you!" Nigel called after Nadia, who had dragged S'rac with her.

            "Well, she obviously wants to make friends with you." S'rac commented.

            "Yeah, those looks she gave me were out of admiration." Nadia rolled her eyes.

            "It's obvious!" S'rac insisted. "Nigel is a direct duplicate of you! He could be your twin brother!"  
  


            "Dude, I look nothing like him!" Nadia cried.

            "If you say so." S'rac shrugged.

            "I do, now drop it!" Nadia snapped.

            "So, what's this about you 'having the hots' for me?" S'rac smirked.

            "Uh…c'mon, I need to find me a new best friend." Nadia changed the subject.

~*~

            "Next!" Nadia called out.

            "Hi!" A girl with short, black hair came in and sat down.

            "Who's your favourite DragonBall Z character?" Nadia started with the questions straight away.

            "Oh Yamcha, he's sooooooo dreamy!" The girl earned a glazed look over her features.

            "What the fuck? Get the hell out, retard!" Nadia shouted, causing the girl to snap out of it and bolt out of the room.

            "What the hell is wrong with you?" S'rac demanded.

            "What do you mean?"

            "This is the fiftieth person we've seen, and you chase her away just like the rest!"

            "I need the perfect best friend!" Nadia insisted.

            "That's understandable, but you've turned people down for simplicities such as their hair being too long, or too short, or the wrong height, or too fat, or too skinny!" S'rac listed off the facts. "It's getting ridiculous!"

            "Fine, we'll do one more and if it's a no go, then I'll stop." Nadia promised.

            "Hey." A boy came in and sat down.

            "What's your name?" Nadia asked the red-haired boy.

            "Roli, yours?" Roli inquired.

            "Oh, I'm Nadia." Nadia smiled. "Who's your favourite DragonBall Z character?"

            "Definitely Buttons!" Roli grinned.

            "Sorry, who?" Nadia looked confused.

            "Oh, my nickname for Vegeta, sorry about that." Roli apologised.

            "Great, I love Vegeta too!"

            "Oh man, have you seen his butt in spandex?" Roli's eyes lit up.

            "Who hasn't? Damn, it's so tight and round!" Nadia smirked.

            "Yup, gotta love that spandex." Roli agreed.

            "Uh huh! The way it clings to every aspect of his body, especially his…"

            "Ahem." S'rac cleared his throat to remind Nadia he was still there.

            "Oh, well Roli, you're now officially my new best friend!" Nadia shook the boy's hand.

            "Wanna come back to my dorm? I have some kick-ass pics of Buttons - nude, of course." Roli grinned.

            "Really? How'd you get them?" Nadia asked.

            "I bribed that purple-haired brat."

            "Nadia, can I have a word?" S'rac asked, not waiting for an answer before pulling Nadia to the side.

            "Aw, whats wrong S'rac? Jealous?" Nadia smirked.

            "No!" S'rac replied indignantly. "Does Roli remind you of someone?"

            "Uh…no, should he?" Nadia asked, looking confused.

            "Oh, I don't know, maybe your long-term best friend?" S'rac asked.

            "Yoli?"

            "Ding ding, give the girl a prize!" S'rac hissed sarcastically.

            "Alright Mr Smart-ass, calm down. Roli is _nothing_ like Yoli, that's the best thing about him!"

            "Oh, so them both naming Vegeta after candy, bribing his son to take nude pics, red hair and general obsession with the Prince has no meaning?" S'rac asked.

            "Dude, it's just a coincidence, trust me." Nadia smiled at S'rac, before turning back to Roli. "Now, about those nude pics?"

            "A coincidence, right." S'rac rolled his eyes.

Anyways promoting Darkjourney's fic ... except he changed his name to **_neonatos_** so just look up the title "**The Depth of Reality**" Why should you read it? Well…it's good…plus myself, S'rac and J'dee co-write it with him. It is a DBZ/FF7 AU starring Yoli! Yup, the crazed bitch from OFUD is now let loose with Vegeta, Cloud AND Sephiroth- the lucky, lucky girl! Anywho, yeah, it's good so read…or else I'll set my goldfish on ya! 


	57. I Wanna Fuck Him

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 

A/N: I had to enter a few people in here instead of the Camping Trip as I got too many submissions. Sorry, but at least you're in OFUD still, I also had to make up some (not-so-original) last names. OK, I'll warn you now, Yoli bursts into song in this chapter. You may want to listen to She Hates Me by Puddle Of Mudd when I put ***'s in a certain paragraph. Be afraid, be very afraid…

            "Nervous?" S'rac asked Nadia.

            "No. Kinda. Very." Nadia paced up and down.

            "Don't be, just remember your speech and everything will be fine!" S'rac comforted.

            "Hello, I'm going up against Yoli here. She knows just how to manipulate the crowd. They'll be putty in her hands!" Nadia began to bang her head against a nearby wall.

            "Trust me, everything will be fine." S'rac hugged Nadia. "And if they're not, you have permission to punch me."

            "Thanks, I'll take you up on that." Nadia smiled warmly, before hearing her name being announced. "That's me, wish me luck!"

            "Good luck!"

            "Vegeta fans, please put your hands together for Nadia Goodyear!" Vega called, clapping as Nadia came on stage.

            "Hey. I know you're all wondering 'why should we vote _her_? What has she got to offer?' Well, my reason for being here is to tell you. All the campaigners, myself included, have one thing in common; our love for Vegeta, but I can honestly say that's where the comparisons between them and myself end. Voting for me will undoubtedly be the best thing you've ever done. I am loyal, articulate, mature and pushy when I need to be. I am not overly shy, nor am I overly confident. I believe I am the best choice for president, and if you are smart, you will too. Thank you, I'm Nadia Goodyear, the future president of V.I.T.B." Nadia gave a little nod of her head, and sat to the side with the campaigners who had already given their speeches. A round of applause filled the room, and Nadia grinned slightly.

            "Thank you, Nadia. Next up is Katryn Green!" Vega clapped politely as Katryn came on stage, brushing a strand of honey blonde hair out of her eyes that strongly resembled those of a cat. She adjusted the mic to suit her height, which was about 5" taller than Nadia, and cleared her throat.

            "Let's face it, you all wanna vote for me as president. No one else is as suitable as me. I'd tell you why to vote for me, but that's boring, you'd all rather hear about Vegeta, no?" Katryn smirked as everyone cheered and whistled. "Well, he has a great ass." Katryn smirked again as whoops of agreement greeted her ears. "Our beloved Spankdex Prince is, basically, hott. There is no other word to describe him. So, vote for me and I will guarantee you all a naked cut-out of him!" Katryn waved, and jogged over to the hard-backed chair waiting for her. 

            "Thank you, Katryn!" Vega said after the applause had died down. "Please welcome, Rallix Devoneir!" A girl who looked slightly like Katryn appeared on stage, a cat-like tail swinging behind her. She had a dark cloak slung across her shoulders, which stopped just above the knee.

            "Please vote for me, as I love Vegeta and have lots to offer the club. However, I have seen some of the campaigners and it is a tough choice. I know you'll make the right decision." And with that, Rallix strode gracefully over to her seat, her tail swinging contentedly behind her.

            "Thank you, Rallix!" Vega announced once more, gesturing with her hands for everyone to finish clapping. "Next up is MQ!" A girl with golden-brown hair walked on stage, her greyish-blue eyes flashing with excitement, a can of soda in her hand. She adjusted the mic and took a sip of soda before beginning her speech.

            "Vote for me because…" MQ stopped mid-sentence. "Hey, have you ever noticed how bubbly soda is? I mean the bubbles just invade your mouth, usually my nose aswell."

            "Coke does that to me all the time!" A girl from the audience piped up.  

            "Coke?" MQ's face took on a thunderous look. "Coke is evil! Pure evil! It should not exist! We need to bomb the coke factories, and then we'll move onto the coke-making people! They are evil aswell! Ahhhhhhhhhh!" MQ ran off stage, screaming obscenities about coke and how it was out to get everyone. 

            "Uh…thank you, MQ." Vega looked at where MQ had dropped her soda. "Next is Xenia Rhodes!" Xenia walked on stage; she had curly black hair and violet eyes. She walked up to the mic, but didn't adjust it, as there was no need.

            "Heh, I didn't actually campaign, my _evil_ friend did it for me." Xenia rubbed her arm self-consciously. "So, I guess there's nothing else to say except, cheese is scary, broccoli and chocolate doesn't mix." She began walking back to her chair, before running back to the mic and exclaiming, "Vote for me!"

            "Thanks, Xenia! Now, last but not least, please welcome Yoli…uh, Yoli!" Vega looked around for Yoli, but couldn't see her.

            "Maybe she's backed out." Nadia muttered to herself. This was the part she was dreading, and honestly would love it if Yoli backed out. Suddenly, the lights shut off, interrupting Nadia's train of thought. Several people screamed, and some hummed scary music. 

            "Hello Vegeta fans!" Yoli's all-too-familiar voice caused Nadia to look upwards, where the noise was coming from. A bright, white spotlight switched on, and there was Yoli, dressed in Saiyan armour, descending to the ground in a makeshift Saiyan pod held by some rope. The introduction of Puddle Of Mudd's 'She Hates Me' came on, and people began to whisper excitedly to each other. Unexpectedly, Yoli jumped off the pod, grabbed the mic and began to sing.
    
    ****** (Cue music here)                                                                                                             
    
    **Met a Saiyan**
    
    **Thought he was grand**
    
    **Fell in love**
    
    **Found out first hand**
    
    **He has a big ego**
    
    **Doesn't stop me wanting to be his ho**
    
    **Some say**
    
    **I am obsessed**
    
    **But how am I supposed to resist**
    
    **That cute butt in spandex**
    
    **He's not short- the perfect height **
    
    **I wanna fuck him**
    
    **Yeah**
    
    **I wanna fuck him**
    
    **La la la lust**
    
    **I try real hard**
    
    **But he manages to escape my advances**
    
    **So I'll just try again**
    
    **Saw his bedroom for about an hour**
    
    **Got caught, and he turned sour**
    
    **Told me to leave him alone**
    
    **Not a chance in Hell**
    
    **I will do that**
    
    **                                                                                              No**
    
    **Some say**
    
    **I am obsessed**
    
    **But how am I supposed to resist**
    
    **That cute butt in spandex**
    
    **He's not short- the perfect height**
    
    **I wanna fuck him**
    
    **Yeah**
    
    **I wanna fuck him**
    
    **La la la lust**
    
    **I try real hard**
    
    **But he manages to escape my advances**
    
    **So I'll just try again.**
    
    **I'm his Number**
    
    **One biggest fan**
    
    **Hate Kakkarot**
    
    **And so does he**
    
    **He's the perfect…uh man**
    
    **Don't think my mum would agree**
    
    **Oh, one more thing**
    
    **Vote for me!**
    
    **I wanna fuck him**
    
    **Yeah**
    
    **I wanna fuck him**
    
    **La la la lust**
    
    **I try real hard**
    
    **But he manages to escape my advances**
    
    **So I'll just try again**
    
    **La la la la la la la la la lust**
    
    **Yeah**
    
    **La la la la la la la la la**
    
    **Yeah**
    
    **La la la la la (Escapes my advances, lust)**
    
    **la la la la**
    
    **I wanna fuck him**
    
    The crowd went wild, whooping and cheering for all they were worth. Yoli had a huge grin plastered over her face, and was breathing heavily because of the exhilarating performance she had just done. Nadia cradled her head in her arms, every ounce of hope that she would win slowly draining away.
    
                   "Thank you, Yoli. We will now have a short break whilst you vote." Vega announced.
    
    ~*~
    
                   "The people have voted, and I have collected the votes and counted them. The new president of the V.I.T.B Club is…" Vega paused for a dramatic effect as a drum roll sounded, and then died out. "Yoli!"  Yoli stood up as the crowd cheered, and went towards the mic to give her acceptance speech. Nadia stood up abruptly, knocking over her chair in the process, and ran out of the room. 
    
                   "Woah, woah, woah." S'rac called as Nadia ran into him. "How'd it go?"
    
                   "How'd it go?" Nadia asked in monotone, before bringing back her arm then letting it go.
    
                   "Fuck!" S'rac cursed, as Nadia's fist connected with his nose. His hands went instinctively up and covered his bloody nose. "Guess she lost." He muttered after her retreating form.
    
    A/N2: Aw, poor Nadia. Or should it be poor S'rac? Pssh, that was mean. Anyways, there's an ad here, and please read and review the fic! It is an excellent story, and doesn't get enough credit! Joe has stopped writing because of the lack of response; so if you've read it but haven't yet reviewed, please do because I want to know what happens, damnit!
    
    Anyways promoting Darkjourney's fic ... except he changed his name to **_neonatos_** so just look up the title "**The Depth of Reality**" Why should you read it? Well…it's good…plus myself, S'rac and J'dee co-write it with him. It is a DBZ/FF7 AU starring Yoli! Yup, the crazed bitch from OFUD is now let loose with Vegeta, Cloud AND Sephiroth- the lucky, lucky girl! Anywho, yeah, it's good so read…or else I'll set my goldfish on ya!
    
    Oh, and for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/src.php?auth=7979
    
    Bye for now!
    
    The Girl and Her Monkey…eep! Damn Kuno! His obsession with pig-tailed girl *ahem*Ranma*ahem* and Akane is unhealthy!


	58. I Like Buying Things

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 
    
    A/N: Sorry about the screwy format last chapter. Wowness. Review alerts are so spiffy! I didn't know it emailed you the actual review! Too spiffy! By the way, yes, this chapter is a week late. However, for once it is not my lazy ass! Ff.net is randomly mad at me and wouldn't let me upload for a whole week! Usually it's a one-off day! Psssh! So don't bother complaining. Oh, and in future if my chapters are late, I will obviously notice that fact so reviews that are as follows;
    
    It's late
    
    Or something familiar, then they will only succeed in angering me to the point where I will purposely make the chapter come out even later. Wow, my first serious A/N! How special! *Smiles as Quorky takes photograph to add to photo album*
    
    Here is Chapter 59;
    
                   "Nadia, hey! Did you know Yoli is president of the V.I.T.B Club? She wouldn't tell me what the V.I.T.B Club was, but apparently it's something important!" Sai said breathlessly, once Nadia had entered the dorm.
    
                   "I'd heard, yeah." Nadia muttered, getting sick and tired of people talking about Yoli.
    
                   "Do you know what it is?" Sai asked, oblivious to Nadia's depression.
    
                   "Hey, are you going on that camping trip?" Nadia asked, not so subtly changing the subject.
    
                   "What camping trip?"
    
                   "Well, Kakkarot said we could go on a camping trip. Just think, alone in the wilderness with Vegeta!" Nadia sighed.
    
                   "Or Trunks! Wow! Where do I sign up?" Sai demanded.
    
                   "I'm going to see Kakkarot in a minute, you can come with me." Nadia said, just as Yoli walked into the dorm. An uncomfortable silence settled over the two girls, and Sai looked around nervously, the thick silence becoming extremely annoying.
    
                   "So…" Sai started.
    
                   "Yep." Nadia added.
    
                   "Uh huh." Yoli said, looking at her feet.
    
                   "Anything happened recently?" Sai tried to get a conversation starting.
    
                   "Nope." Nadia stated.
    
                   "Nah." Yoli began playing with a loose thread in her jumper.
    
                   "For fuck's sake, talk!" Sai yelled, the silence sending her over the brink of insanity.
    
                   "Hey, congratulations…"
    
                   "Sorry about the…" Yoli and Nadia spoke at the same time.
    
                   "You first." Nadia said.
    
                   "No, that's OK, you go." Yoli insisted.
    
                   "Someone go first, damnit!" Sai interrupted.
    
                   "Nice song." Nadia grinned mischievously.
    
                   "Thanks." Yoli smiled warmly.
    
                   "No problem."
    
                   "See, this is what I'm talking about!" Sai grinned. "Uh…carry on, I'll shut up now."
    
                   "So…are you going on this camping trip?" Nadia asked.
    
                   "Girl, are you crazy? I wouldn't miss being alone in the wilderness with Skittles for anything! Except maybe having a weekend in an isolated cottage with him." Yoli smirked.
    
                   "Me and Sai were just about to go see Kakkarot about it, you coming?"
    
                   "Sure."
    
    ~*~
    
                   "Hello Kakkarot." Yoli said icily, bordering on insane.
    
                   "Uh…hey!" Goku said, as he entered the classroom. 
    
                   "You organised this camping trip yet?" Nadia asked.
    
                   "I don't really think this is the time to talk about it." Goku said, opening his briefcase and taking out some notes. (A/N: O.o)
    
                   "Huh? What else are we supposed to do in here?" Yoli demanded.
    
                   "Uh…work?" Goku replied, which was supposed to be sarcastic but it somehow didn't work out.
    
                   "Psssh, yeah right!" Nadia laughed. "Oh…you were serious."
    
                   "Damnit, Kakkarot, we want our week alone with Skittles, and we want it now! Don't make me hurt you!" Yoli threatened. As impossible as Yoli actually hurting Goku was, the mad glint in her eye still caused the grown Saiyan to gulp.
    
                   "How about next week?" Goku asked.
    
                   "Great!" Yoli grinned. "Hey, class!" She called, to get the students attention. "Camping trip next week, sign up, limited places." She frowned upon noticing no one rushing over to sign up.
    
                   "A week alone in the wilderness with the DragonBall Z character of your choice, places going fast!" Nadia yelled, jumping onto a nearby desk as hoards of students came over to collect a form.
    
    ~*~
    
                   "Dude, we get platoons and everything, just like J'dee's Boot Camp!" Nadia remarked, referring to the fanfiction they weren't supposed to reading.
    
                   "Coolness! Tick Skittles, tick Skittles!" Yoli jumped up and down on her bed.
    
                   "Of course I'm going to tick Vegeta. Speaking of the Prince, what's he doing?"
    
                   "Lemme check." Yoli reached over to her drawers and pulled out some hi-tech digital binoculars. "Dude, you'll never guess! He's dancing in his room, 'Risky Business' style!"
    
                   "What? Move it or lose it!" Nadia screeched, scrambling next to Yoli and peering through her own binoculars that were situated under her pillow.
    
                   "Gotcha!" Yoli laughed, falling off her bed in hysterics.
    
                   "Dude, that was so not cool!" Nadia said, returning her binoculars and jumping off her bed.
    
                   "You're so gullible!"
    
                   "But just think! That would be such a good picture to sell!" Nadia sighed, returning to the form that had fallen on the floor in her hurry.
    
                   "Dude, put 'Skittles' in brackets next to everything that reads 'Vegeta' on that form, will ya?" Yoli said as an afterthought.
    
                   "Good idea, that way they will use it more often!" Nadia said, scribbling down Yoli's request. "Right, all we need to do now is shop for camping stuff!" She added, once she'd put the form in her dorm post-box.
    
                   "Let's go!" Yoli hopped off her bed and put her hi-tech digital binoculars back in their place.
    
    ~*~
    
                   "This place just gets bigger and bigger." Nadia remarked, looking up at the huge sign that read 'OFUD Shopping Centre'. The place where all students could buy necessities, without worrying about their anime appearance.
    
                   "Dude, Seventeen is just trying to rip us off with these ridiculous prices. I bet the money goes to him buying all these designer bandanas he has." Yoli shook her head, whilst stroking Skittles Jr behind the ear.
    
                   "Seventeen wears designer bandanas? They all look the same to me!" Nadia commented.
    
                   "Nope, each one is unique." Yoli insisted. "Ooooooo, new Skittles plushies!"  
    
      
    
    
    
                   "Dude, they're a must for the camping trip!"
    
                   "Definitely!" Yoli said, grabbing all the plushies she could get her hands on.
    
                   "That'll be fifty credits, please." The cashier announced, referring to the money system at OFUD.
    
                   "There." Nadia handed over the credits, paying for both hers and Yoli's. "They're for this camping trip!"
    
                   "OK, Skittles Jr, calm down!" Yoli bent down and gave Skittles Jr a Goku plushie to chew on.
    
                   "Uh, here, I'll pay for that too." Nadia threw down half a credit, what the plushie had cost.
    
                   "What else do we need?" Yoli asked, Skittles Jr in her arms.
    
                   "Sleeping bags, protective photo frames, hiking boots, waterproof trousers and jackets, rucksacks and milk." Nadia read from the list.
    
                   "Ugh, hiking boots and waterproof suits? Great!" Yoli muttered sarcastically.
    
                   "That's why we're stopping off at 'Bra's Accessories'." Nadia smirked.
    
                   "Oooo, I love the Skittles part of that shop!" Yoli grinned, rubbing her hands together and almost dropping Skittles Jr in the process.
    
    ~*~
    
                   "Could you pass us another basket?" Nadia asked, barely managing to balance the three full baskets she already had. One was full of various Vegeta stickers, the other full of patches and pens emblazoned with the Saiyan Prince's face or phrases associated with him and the last was heavy with Vegeta key chains and a matching Vegeta lead, bowl and ball for Skittles Jr.
    
                   "Sure thing!" Yoli said, handing one to Nadia whilst skilfully handling her own array of Vegeta goodies.
    
                   "I'd forgotten how much I love this place."
    
                   "I haven't. Remember when we got in debt with Gohan 'cos he leant us them credits and we blew them all on this place?" Yoli asked.
    
                   "Uh…no." Nadia wrinkled her face in confusion.
    
                   "Oh, must've been a dream. I did, after all, beat Gohan when he was SSJ." Yoli mused.
    
                   "Yep, sounds like a dream." Nadia grinned, queuing at the cashier desk.
    
                   "Oooo, look Skittles Jr! Nadia bought you some Skittles-related accessories!" Yoli cooed, smiling as the mini-monster licked her outstretched hand.
    
                   "C'mon, what's taking so long?" Nadia asked impatiently.
    
                   "Just what I was thinking." A girl with pink hair and wearing a black T-shirt reading 'T-sama' exclaimed.
    
                   "Yeah, man, what's the hold-up? We want Skittles stuff and we want it now!" Yoli shouted to the front of the queue.
    
                   "I have to be back for six!" T-sama muttered.
    
                   "Hmph, you didn't inform me of this!" A grey panther that sat on T-sama's shoulder complained.
    
                   "Wow, what's that?" Nadia asked in awe.
    
                   "It's called a panther, Nadia." Yoli said sarcastically.
    
                   "My muse, Zelaya." T-sama explained. "He's always complaining." She whispered.
    
                   "I heard that!" Zelaya huffed.
    
                   "You were supposed to." T-sama smirked, causing Zelaya to grumble incoherently.
    
                   "Goddamnit people, what are you doing? Making the damn things?" Yoli screamed at the top of her lungs.
    
                   "Keep your fucking knickers on!" A reply came back down the queue.
    
                   "What the hell? My knickers are on, you hentai!" Yoli screeched back, causing Skittles Jr to yelp and hide behind Nadia's legs.
    
                   "It's a saying, you dumbfuck!" Came the reply.
    
                   "I knew that!" Yoli shouted back indignantly.
    
                   "Sure you did!"
    
                   "What the hell is taking so long?" Nadia demanded.
    
                   "The Gohan badges have just arrived, I'm waiting for them to unpack them, OK?" The reply huffed.
    
                   "Gohan? Who the hell would buy a Gohan badge? He's a queer boy!" Yoli laughed, but abruptly stopped as a girl with long brown hair appeared in front of Yoli, her brown eyes flashing angrily.
    
                   "What. Did. You. Say?" The girl demanded, in even, clipped sentences.
    
                   "I said Gohan is queer, you deaf bitch!" Yoli replied.
    
                   "Yoli, dude, calm down." Nadia said.
    
                   "I should put you in the microwave with my marshmallows!" The girl threatened.
    
                   "What the fuck?" Yoli looked confused.
    
                   "Muwhahahahahahahaha!" The girl laughed uproariously. 
    
                   "Excuse me, the badges are unpacked." The cashier called.
    
                   "Great stuff!" The girl bounded back to the cashier's desk with a grin on her face.
    
                   "What a freak." Yoli rolled her eyes.
    
                   "That's TypoNumber5, TN5 for short. She likes squirrels." T-sama said matter-of-factly.
    
                   "Uh…that's nice." Nadia said.
    
                   "About time, too!" Yoli huffed, as the queue began to move forwards.
    
                   "Sayonara, suckers!" TN5 waved goodbye as she opened the door, a Goku-themed bucket falling off the shelf and hitting her on the head.
    
                   "Ha, what an idiot." Yoli muttered, moving forward with the queue and promptly hitting her head on the cardboard banner hanging from the roof.
    
                   "Yeah, a major idiot." Nadia rolled her eyes.
    
    A/N2: Yay! They're friends again! Hey guys, I was thinking and I've decided to stop this fic at 100 chapters. Maybe I'll go onto a nice Mary-Sue after this, or a V/M- there's not enough of those, who knows. Anyways, there's an ad here, and please read and review the fic! It is an excellent story, and doesn't get enough credit! Joe has stopped writing because of the lack of response; so if you've read it but haven't yet reviewed, please do because I want to know what happens, damnit!
    
    Anyways promoting Darkjourney's fic ... except he changed his name to **_neonatos_** so just look up the title "**The Depth of Reality**" Why should you read it? Well…it's good…plus myself, S'rac and J'dee co-write it with him. It is a DBZ/FF7 AU starring Yoli! Yup, the crazed bitch from OFUD is now let loose with Vegeta, Cloud AND Sephiroth- the lucky, lucky girl! Anywho, yeah, it's good so read…or else I'll set my goldfish on ya!
    
    YES! The sequel to Ain't Nothing But Magick is out! Yesh! Maybe this time I'll succeed in seducing Veggie. So, for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/src.php?auth=7979****


	59. It Can't Be Him! He's Dead!

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 
    
    A/N: Yo yo Yogz! Bleh, those yoghurts were disgusting, but the advert was funny ^_^ Woohoo, new eps of DragonBall Z tomorrow (information correct at time of printing…uh, writing.) New coolness channel, CNX, dedicated to Anime! Woohoo! 'Bout time, Anime night on Sci Fi just wasn't doing it for me. Ah, well enough of my senseless ranting. 
    
    Here is Chapter 60
    
    WOW! Sixty fucking chapters, and you're STILL reading?
    
    Quorky: They won't for much longer if you carry on with your incoherent ramblings that are of no knowledgeable value.
    
    Uh…Ok
    
    Here is Chapter 60;
    
                   "Hi, we're here to see…JOE!" Nadia exclaimed with glee, running over to her friend and hugging him tightly.
    
                   "Uh…hello." Joe greeted, quickly withdrawing from the hug.
    
                   "You look great!" Nadia said enthusiastically.
    
                   "Oh yeah, pale skin, greasy hair and still in my pyjamas. The best I've looked in years." He replied sarcastically.
    
                   "Can you believe it?" Yoli shouted from the other side of the hospital. "They don't have plain chocolate in the vender!"  
    
      
    
    
    
                   "Yoli, look!" Nadia gestured to Joe.
    
                   "Ahhhhhhhhh!" Yoli dropped the polystyrene cup of coffee she was holding. "A ghost!"
    
                   "Huh?" Joe looked confused.
    
                   "It speaks!" Yoli gasped.
    
                   "Yoli, we've already been through this, Joe didn't die."
    
                   "He did!" Yoli insisted. "And he's come to terrorise us for loving the incredibly-hot Saiyan that did this to him, Skittles!"
    
                   "Mhmmm." Joe mumbled and dropped into the foetal position.
    
                   "Well, just call me 'The Original Ghostbuster'." Yoli grinned, dusting down her hands.
    
                   "Joe, are you OK? Joe?" Nadia shook Joe's trembling form.
    
                   "Think happy thoughts. Bunny rabbits. Nice bunny rabbits. Pink bunny rabbits. Bunny rabbits with Gandalf tails…ah, no!" Joe wailed.
    
                   "Hurry up, man. I wanna get my Skittles stuff home!"
    
                   "Mhmmm!" Joe wailed again.
    
                   "Does he have something against Skittles?"
    
                   "Mhmmm!" 
    
                   "Yoli, of course he has something against Vegeta!" Nadia yelled.
    
                   "Mhmmm!"
    
                   "Why?" Yoli asked incredulously, glaring daggers at Joe in the process.
    
                   "Uh…because he practically killed him?" Nadia stated sarcastically.
    
                   "Hmmm…that could be it." Yoli mused, ignorant of Nadia's sarcasm.
    
                   "Come on, Joe." Nadia coaxed Joe to stand up.
    
                   "Is…is…_he_…ya know…here?" Joe asked shakily.
    
                   "No, no, don't worry about it." Nadia reassured.
    
                   "Only in our hearts." Yoli sighed dreamily.
    
                   "I've gotta go now, guys. My room mate is supposed to be picking me up at the front." Joe informed Nadia and Yoli, back to his usual self once he knew Vegeta wasn't within ten feet of him.
    
                   "OK, we'll see you at the camping trip. You are coming, aren't you?" Nadia asked.
    
                   "Uh…I'll think about it." Joe replied, walking away.
    
    ~*~ (A Week Later)
    
                   "Can you see Joe anywhere?" Nadia asked, scanning the crowds of people.
    
                   "Nope." Yoli replied, not bothering to look.
    
                   "What the hell is taking so long?" A boy, who looked rather dangerous, with platinum hair demanded.
    
                   "Cool, a Saiyan dude who is…well, a dude." Yoli commented, spotting the boys tail thrashing with annoyance through a hole in his black cloak.
    
                   "Wow, so exciting." Nadia rolled her eyes.
    
                   "Sorry for the wait." Gohan addressed the crowds, pushing his glasses up on his nose, causing a group of girls to sigh heavily.
    
                   "Retards." Yoli muttered.
    
                   "I want you all to behave on this trip. Any disobedience and we will risk students going missing." Gohan warned.
    
                   "I'd really hate 'getting lost' with Vegeta." Nadia drawled sarcastically.
    
                   "Now, name tags are being passed around. Please pin them somewhere clearly so your group leaders will not need to search for them." 
    
                   "Name tags? What the fuck?" The boy with platinum hair cursed, pinning a tag with the name 'Kiva' written in blank ink across white laminated card onto his cloak. "Oh yeah, I bet I look real scary now."
    
                   "Oh what a shame." Yoli said unhappily. "I have nowhere to put my tag." She looked around, before quickly pinning it to her bra. "Now Skittles will have to search for it."
    
                   "I look so dumb." Nadia muttered, ignoring her friend's crude actions.
    
                   "Now, can all students find the table with their names listed by the side and wait their for the respective leaders." Gohan finally instructed.
    
                   "Ooo, ooo, I see us!" Yoli cried happily, running over to the table. "I can't wait for Skittles to get here, so he can search for my name tag!"
    
                   "I'm pretty sure he knows us by now. Whether he wants to or not." Nadia commented.
    
                   "Damn, you're right."
    
                   "Hey, I'm Julia." A girl with light brown hair and hazel eyes stuck out her hand.
    
                   "Nadia." Nadia shook the girl's hand.
    
                   "Yoli!" Yoli grinned.
    
                   "Please be patient!" Your leaders will be with you in a few moments!" Gohan shouted over the chaos, rather feebly.
    
                   "Damn, does Gohan suck or what?" Julia asked.
    
                   "No way!" A girl with brown hair pulled back in a ponytail exclaimed.
    
                   "Yes he does." Nadia, Yoli and Julia insisted.
    
                   "Then why the hell are you in the Gohan group?" The girl challenged.
    
                   "Listen, uh…" Yoli began.
    
                   "Sakura." The tall girl crossed her arms in defiance.
    
                   "Listen, Sakura, this is the _Vegeta _group." Yoli re-started.
    
                   "Yeah!" Julia agreed, before her face faulted. "No it isn't."
    
                   "Sure it is!" Nadia insisted.
    
                   "No…it's the Trunks group!" Julia said. "Are you lot not Trunks fans?"
    
                   "No way! Gohan!"
    
                   "Nu uh! Vegeta!"
    
                   "Yeah dude, Vegeta!"  
    
      
    
    
    
                   "Hey, I thought this was the Trunks group, too!" A girl with bright, red eyes exclaimed. Her nametag read 'Kyana'.
    
                   "Vegeta!"
    
                   "Trunks!"
    
                   "Gohan!"
    
                   "Krillin!"
    
                   "What?" All girls asked incredulously.
    
                   "I said 'Krillin'!" A girl with brown hair and brown eyes repeated, causing the others to explode with laughter. "And just what is so funny?"
    
                   "Krillin is bald!" Julia and Sakura exclaimed.
    
                   "And small!" Kyana added.
    
                   "And ugly!" Yoli said with distaste.
    
                   "And nose-less!" Nadia chimed in.
    
                   "Oh?" The girl, San, said, getting annoyed. "As oppose to a chicken-shit, when it comes to his 'mummy', scholar with no dress sense, a pink-haired puff with enough suggestive comments to make Frieza jealous and a big-headed alien-thing that enjoys wearing pink shirts and, even though he has hair, would be better off bald!"
    
                   "Vegeta has perfectly good hair!" Nadia defended.
    
                   "Trunks is not gay!" Julia and Kyana stated at the same time.
    
                   "And Gohan has excellent dress sense, it's Saiyaman who doesn't!" Sakura smirked.
    
                   "We'll see which group this really is! The leaders are coming!" San grinned smugly, certain she was in the correct place.
    
                   "Yeah!" The others agreed, each of them certain _they _were in the correct place.
    
                   "Right, brats, no talking, no fun and I'm sure we'll tolerate each other on this kamiforsaken trip." A deep voice grumbled.
    
                   "No way!" Each girl exclaimed.
    
                   "How the hell did we get in the Piccolo group?" Yoli demanded.
    
    A/N2: Woohoo, Joe's finally awake! About time too, the lazy boy! Muwhahahahaha, Yoli and Nadia get stuck with Piccolo for a week. The lucky girls.
    
    Anyways promoting Darkjourney's fic ... except he changed his name to **_neonatos_** so just look up the title "**The Depth of Reality**" Why should you read it? Well…it's good…plus myself, S'rac and J'dee co-write it with him. It is a DBZ/FF7 AU starring Yoli! Yup, the crazed bitch from OFUD is now let loose with Vegeta, Cloud AND Sephiroth- the lucky, lucky girl! Anywho, yeah, it's good so read…or else I'll set my goldfish on ya!
    
    YES! The sequel to Ain't Nothing But Magick is out! Yesh! Maybe this time I'll succeed in seducing Veggie. So, for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/src.php?auth=7979****


	60. 1000 Reviews Chapter

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. 
    
    A/N: Not everyone told me their favourite DragonBall Z character, although I _stressed_ that it was a vital statistic, so anyone who didn't will automatically become Vegeta fans.
    
    Quorky: Why not Bulma?
    
    Because Vegeta is oh-so-more prettier than her!  
    
      
    
    
    
    Quorky: Nu uh!
    
    Uh huh!
    
    Quorky: Nu uh!
    
    Uh huh!
    
    Quorky: Nu uh!
    
    Uh huh!
    
    Quorky: Nu uh!
    
    Uh huh!
    
    Quorky: Hmph, I will no longer rise to your immature bait!
    
    Uh hu- fine!
    
    Here is Chapter 61;
    
                   "Ugh, I recognise that voice." Piccolo cringed.
    
                   "Mine?" Yoli asked in surprise.
    
                   "Yeah. You're that kid who follows Vegeta around, aren't you?"
    
                   "Yep!" Yoli grinned proudly.
    
                   "What a great bunch of kids I got." Piccolo growled, smirking sardonically upon hearing various screams of terror. "Looks like the other groups have met their leaders."
    
                   "Sorry I'm late. Show me the Yamcha!" J'dee ran up to the group, breathing heavily from her sprint.
    
                   "Yamcha isn't here. I'm your leader." Piccolo smirked. "Disappointed?"
    
                   "Nah, not really. The Green Bean is OK with me." J'dee grinned.
    
                   "Damn kids." Piccolo muttered.
    
                   "Hey, I'm not a kid!" J'dee insisted.
    
                   "Don't make eye contact, maybe then we'll make it out of this alive." Nadia whispered.
    
                   "Piccolo!" A tall girl with dark brown hair attached herself to Piccolo's back.
    
                   "What the fuck?" The Namek growled angrily.
    
                   "I wanna join your group!" The girl whined.
    
                   "Let me guess. Seren?" Piccolo rolled his eyes.
    
                   "Aw, you remember me! How sweet!" Seren cooed, tickling the Namek's ears.
    
                   "Where'd you come from?" San asked, watching the girl assault Piccolo.
    
                   "The Vegeta group." Seren pouted.
    
                   "Dude, swap!" Yoli offered.
    
                   "And leave me here?" Nadia looked offended.
    
                   "Um." Yoli paused, looking from Nadia to her Vegeta badge. "Yep."
    
                   "Hmph!" Nadia folded her arms in annoyance.
    
                   "Get back to your group, now!" Piccolo bellowed.
    
                   "Don't worry, my Namek. Once my plans for world domination have come through, we will take our rightful place, side-by-side, as King and Queen." Seren promised, reluctantly being dragged away from Piccolo by a member of her group.
    
                   "Damn." Yoli muttered.
    
                   "Pick up your crap, we're moving." Piccolo instructed, walking away.
    
                   "Hold up!" Julia cried, hauling her Trunks cut-out over her shoulder and scrambling after the group.
    
                   "I can't believe I'm going hiking with Piccolo!" J'dee exclaimed, taking out her notepad and crossing out something on her 'To Do' list.
    
                   "I believed I could fly, I believed I was the FBI. Got locked up in an asylum, they took away all my chewing gum." Yoli sang merrily.
    
                   "Do not sing." Piccolo stated simply.
    
                   "What about humming?" San asked. 
    
                   "No."
    
                   "Whistling?" Sakura tried.
    
                   "Definitely not."
    
                   "How about _thinking?_" Kyana joked.
    
                   "If you think you can handle that." Piccolo said dryly.
    
                   "Psssh." Nadia spluttered.
    
                   "Eh? I don't get it." Yoli piped up.
    
                   "Yo, Green, are you aware that none of the groups are behind us?" J'dee addressed Piccolo, adjusting the little handbag that rested on her shoulder.
    
                   "Their group leaders are obviously incompetent." Piccolo huffed.
    
                   "Skittles may be incompetent in hiking, but I bet he's not in the bedroom!" Yoli grinned.
    
                   "One-track mind." Julia hissed.
    
                   "Are we there yet?" J'dee whined.
    
                   "Where is _there_?" Kyana inquired.
    
                   "Um…I don't know." J'dee admitted. "Green, are we there, wherever there is?"
    
                   "Even if your question made sense it would be ridiculous." Piccolo stated. "We are going to find a place to camp for the night. It could take from as much as three hours to twelve plus."
    
                   "Three hours at the _least_?" Sakura asked incredulously.
    
                   "Who's dumb idea was this camping trip, anyway?" San demanded.
    
                   "Ours." Nadia and Yoli muttered glumly.
    
    ~*~
    
                   "How about this spot?" Kyana offered.
    
                   "No." Piccolo repeated for the one hundredth and odd time.
    
                   "Why not?" Sakura demanded.
    
                   "Ahhh! Ants!" A girl Yoli recognised as CrowMirror ran past the group.
    
                   "That is why." Piccolo stated.
    
                   "Get them off me! Help! It burns!" CrowMirror ran around, scratching herself.
    
                   "Come on, CrowMirror!" Krillin appeared out of nowhere, the remnants of rope tied around his wrists and body.
    
                   "Chrome Dome, how did you manage to escape?" CrowMirror stopped running and looked at Krillin in shock.
    
                   "I'm gonna kill Vegeta for giving me that nickname." Krillin muttered.
    
                   "You wish, baldy!" Yoli shouted.
    
                   "No way could you beat Vegeta!" Nadia added.
    
                   "Yes he could!" San insisted. "You ignore them, Krillin, I believe in you!"
    
                   "Let's get going." Krillin dragged a scratching CrowMirror away with him.
    
                   "Damn, some people are so lucky." San sighed, referring to CrowMirror.
    
                   "Oh yeah, so lucky." Nadia said sarcastically.
    
                   "Keep moving, brats." Piccolo ordered.
    
                   "What's that?" Sakura demanded.
    
                   "I don't hear anything." Piccolo stated.
    
                   "There it is again!" Sakura insisted.
    
                   "You're saying you can hear something but Piccolo, a Namek with advanced hearing, can't?" J'dee asked.
    
                   "Uh…I guess. There it is again. Can't anyone hear it?" Sakura asked.
    
                   "I can." Julia offered.
    
                   "You're all being ridiculous. There is nothing there!" Piccolo insisted.
    
                   "Honestly, I swear I-ah!" Julia was cut off by a huge, shadowy figure jumping on her and knocking her to the ground.                  
    
    A/N2: 
    
     New promotion! Yep, read 'Koneka's Excellent Vacation' by dbzmomma, it is sooooo good! I can't believe it has only 9 reviews! It's hilarious and Koneka is such a lucky bitch! Just six chapters into the fic and she's already fucked Vegeta!
    
    YES! The sequel to Ain't Nothing But Magick is out! Yesh! Maybe this time I'll succeed in seducing Veggie. So, for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/src.php?auth=7979****


	61. Survival Skills

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. I don't own Buffy The Vampire Slayer.
    
    A/N: Hey all! Hows it going? All I can say is; it is damn cold over here in England. Sorry it's like, a week late, but I've been too busy lately.
    
    Here's Chapter 62;
    
                   "Holy shit! It's like something from Buffy!" San breathed, as she and the rest of the group looked on in awe as a bright pink 'thing' knocked over Julia.
    
                   "Ah…can't…breathe…" Julia gasped, trying to shove the heavy being off of her.
    
                   "Sorry, didn't see you there." The 'thing' apologised in a surprisingly normal, masculine voice.
    
                   "Uh…let me be the first to say, eh?" Yoli asked.
    
                   "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you all." The pink, with yellow spots, thing grinned, giving the impression that he had, in fact, wanted to scare them. "I'm Deathdroid."
    
                   "What's with the costume?" Nadia asked.
    
                   "It's not a costume." Deathdroid snapped. "I accidentally ticked the last option on the form. The 'Unspeakable horror, wanting to take over Earth and its inhabitants'."
    
                   "Well that was clever." J'dee smirked.
    
                   "Hey, I thought it was a dream! Besides, I was as tired as hell and thought it said 'Human who tries to save Earth and its inhabitants'."
    
                   "That's an interesting life story." Piccolo started. "But why the hell are you interrupting me and my group whilst we are taking part in a team building exercise?"
    
                   "Team building? More like lung collapsing." Sakura scoffed.
    
                   "Quiet you! Well?"
    
                   "Uh…I'm kinda lost…I think I scared Bulma so she purposely tried to lose me." Deathdroid explained.
    
                   "See, that's the type of woman Skittles is with! It's not right!" Yoli exclaimed.
    
                   "So…can I hang with you guys?" 
    
                   "No, don't do it!" Kyana screamed.
    
                   "Sure." Piccolo said, trying to force a smile but it came out all mangled and scary-like.
    
                   "Now you've done it." J'dee muttered.
    
                   "This is the perfect spot, set up camp!" Piccolo barked.
    
                   "Woohoo!" Yoli cheered.
    
                   "Dude, why are you cheering? You didn't have to carry the damn tent for over four hours!" Nadia huffed.
    
                   "Technicalities, Nadia, technicalities." Yoli shook her head, hammering some metal pegs into the ground.
    
                   "Yoli, I need to put the strings on those pegs yet." Nadia rolled her eyes.
    
                   "Oh." Yoli looked at the pegs and tried pulling them back out. "Damn, I don't know my own…oof!"  
    
      
    
    
    
                   "Nice look, Yoli." J'dee commented, looking at Yoli who had landed in a muddy puddle.
    
                   "Aw man, how am I supposed to get clean now?" Yoli demanded.
    
                   "It's called a shower." Deathdroid stated sarcastically.
    
                   "No showers. We are camping." Piccolo spoke to them like they were five years old.
    
                   "What?" They all exclaimed.
    
                   "I am so hungry!" Sakura whined, holding her stomach for added effect.
    
                   "I'll order pizza." J'dee announced, turning her handbag upside down and emptying the contents.
    
                   "How the hell did you manage to walk in those?" Kyana asked, referring to J'dee's knee-length boots.
    
                   "Lot's of practise and a smidgen of Vaseline." J'dee replied, knowingly. "Crap, no signal!"
    
                   "Awww." The rest of the group moaned.
    
                   "And just how were you expecting pizza to be delivered **_in the middle of nowhere?_**" Piccolo yelled.
    
                   "Hey, pizza dudes are very intelligent these days. They'd find a way." Julia commented.
    
                   "I don't think so, my brother's a pizza dude. You have not seen my brother." Nadia shook her head.
    
                   "Dude, he is fit!" Yoli commented.
    
                   "Ew! Yoli!" Nadia shouted.
    
                   "What? He is! I wouldn't mind jumping his bones, socks and all." Yoli grinned.
    
                   "Mental picture, mental picture." Nadia shuddered, as she proceeded to put up her tent.
    
                   "Has a week gone by yet?" J'dee whined, sighing in frustration as her tent had just collapsed.
    
                   "Why'd you come if you didn't wanna do camping stuff?" Deathdroid asked, confused.
    
                   "For Malteasers of course!" J'dee insisted.
    
                   "Malteasers?" Deathdroid asked.
    
                   "Yamcha to you and me." Julia whispered.
    
                   "Ah."  
    
      
    
    
    
                   "Yeah man, I mean, why come camping if I can't sneak into Skittles' tent?" Yoli demanded.
    
                   "Hey, you can sneak into Piccolo's tent!" Sakura smirked.
    
                   "Do I look blind, deaf and dumb? Why the fuck would I wanna sneak into that physically retarded thing's tent?" Yoli muttered.
    
                   "Ahem." Piccolo pointed to his ears.
    
                   "Yes, they're big and ugly and green. Your point is?" San asked.
    
                   "Shut up, brat." Piccolo growled.
    
                   "Eeeep!" J'dee squealed as it began to rain.
    
                   "Hurry up, Kyana, it's raining!" Sakura urged.
    
                   "Really? Those droplets of water indicate it's raining? You learn something everyday." Kyana muttered sarcastically. "Done."
    
                   "A…little…help…people." J'dee managed to get out, before the tent collapsed again.
    
                   "Here." Deathdroid, who had put his tent up first, simply stood on the pegs, making them stick into the ground. 
    
                   "Thanks!" J'dee smiled gratefully.
    
                   "So, Piccolo," Nadia began, from her and Yoli's tent. "What do we eat?"
    
                   "Whatever you can catch." Piccolo muttered from his tent.
    
                   "Eh? Aren't you gonna get us something?" San asked, puzzled.
    
                   "In case you have forgotten, I do not need nutritious supplements." Piccolo said. "Now shut up, I'm meditating."
    
                   "Well, this is fun." J'dee muttered.
    
                   "Yeah man, like that episode of The Simpsons, where all the school kids were stranded, Lord Of The Flies stylee." Julia commented, who was sharing a tent with San.
    
                   "We should split up. Some people should go looking for food, the others for firewood." Deathdroid suggested.
    
                   "Aw, well isn't the monster a little camper." J'dee cooed.
    
                   "San, Julia, Kyana and Sakura can go looking for food. Me, J'dee, Nadia and Yoli will look for firewood." Deathdroid instructed.
    
    ~*~ (Somewhere in the Wilderness-Yoli, Nadia, J'dee and Deathdroid.)
    
                   "So, is it fun being a monster?" Nadia asked.
    
                   "No. I'm pink and yellow, for fuck's sake!" Deathdroid complained.
    
                   "That you are." Yoli said.
    
                   "So, what are we looking for again?" J'dee asked.
    
                   "Wood." Deathdroid answered.
    
                   "Oh, I thought it was Skittles." Yoli replied, causing Nadia and Deathdroid to roll their eyes.
    
                   "When we get back to the University, I'm complaining. I've been here for a year and a half, and still no sign of Paris!" Deathdroid moaned.
    
                   "I'm cold." J'dee whined.
    
                   "Wood!" Nadia called, directing them towards a huge pile of, coincidentally, dry wood. 
    
                   "So, how do we carry this?" J'dee asked.
    
                   "With our hands?" Yoli offered.
    
                   "Well, we can get them into bundles, tie them with blades of grass and then carry them!" Nadia said.
    
                   "But won't the grass…" Deathdroid started.
    
                   "That's how they do it on TV, and TV never lies!" Nadia insisted, getting a pile of wood and some grass. The others followed suit.
    
    ~*~ (An hour and 568,000,000,008 blades of grass later.)
    
                   "TV lies like a dog." Nadia muttered sourly.
    
                   "But at least it makes an honest living!" Yoli added.
    
                   "Yoli, that is so true." Nadia said, picking up as many loose sticks as she could.
    
    ~*~ (Practically right next to the tents-San, Julia, Kyana and Sakura.)
    
                   "We must've been walking for hours!" San whined.
    
                   "About three and a half minutes." Kyana checked her watch.
    
                   "So long?" San asked.
    
                   "What stuff are we looking for?" Sakura asked.
    
                   "Berries, nuts, hamburgers, stuff like that." Julia answered.
    
                   "Ah right." Sakura nodded knowingly.
    
                   "Shhhhhh!" San hissed.
    
                   "Eh?" Everyone else exclaimed loudly.
    
                   "I hear something!" San insisted.
    
                   "Me too." Sakura whispered.
    
                   "Follow me." San instructed, creeping towards a nearby array of bushes. All four girls lay on their fronts.
    
                   "OK, lets just part the bushes and get a peep." Kyana suggested.
    
                   "Alright." The other three agreed.
    
                   "Do you see anything?" Julia asked.
    
                   "No." The other three answered.
    
                   "I do!" Sakura exclaimed excitedly. "It's another camping group. They don't look too happy. They're all muddy and tired."
    
                   "Whose group is it?" Julia asked.
    
                   "Wow!" Kyana muttered. "It's Vegeta's! The poor guys, they look exhausted!"
    
                   "Shhh, let's move out!" Julia suggested. "We don't want Vegeta noticing us."
    
                   "Good idea!" Sakura said, as the four girls crept away quietly.              
    
                   "Eeep!" San jumped in surprise as someone tapped her shoulder.         
    
                   "Hi." A tall girl with blonde hair and green eyes behind glasses, greeted.
    
                   "Shush!" Kyana hissed.
    
                   "Sorry." The girl whispered.
    
                   "Who are you?" Kyana inquired.            
    
                   "My name's Paige."
    
                   "I'm Julia, this is San, Kyana and Sakura." Julia introduced them all.
    
                   "I'm from the Vegeta group. I saw you watching us and was just curious." Paige explained.
    
                   "We're from the Piccolo group." Sakura made a face.
    
                   "So you guys didn't get who you wanted on the form, either? I thought it was just our group. I put Yamcha." Paige added.
    
                   "Nope, I wanted Gohan." Sakura said unhappily.
    
                   "And I wanted Trunks." Julia added.
    
                   "Me too." Said Kyana.
    
                   "Krillin." San said, before adding. "And don't bother laughing."
    
                   "Guys, do you think we should tell Yoli and Nadia about our 'find'?" Sakura asked.
    
                   "I don't see why not." Kyana answered.
    
                   "Yeah, but what if they go all insane and stuff? Those two are unpredictable if they know they're within ten feet of Vegeta." San said.
    
                   "True." Julia said. "So, do we tell them, or not?"
    
    A/N2: 
    
     New promotion! Yep, read 'Koneka's Excellent Vacation' by dbzmomma, it is sooooo good! It's hilarious and Koneka is such a lucky bitch! Just six chapters into the fic and she's already fucked Vegeta!
    
    The sequel to Ain't Nothing But Magick is out! Yesh! Maybe this time I'll succeed in seducing Veggie. So, for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/src.php?auth=7979****


	62. So Hungry!

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. I don't own Buffy The Vampire Slayer.
    
    A/N: Yo! Hows people? Well, this is my last chapter until January. Christmas is busy as it is, without my modules and crap, so yeah. Hopefully the alignment change has worked…hopefully O.o
    
     Oh DD, you are sooooo gonna love me for this chapter, you pink blob!
    
    Here's Chapter 63;
    
                   "Holy shit!" Sakura exclaimed, jumping in shock.
    
                   "Sorry, I'll remember not to say 'Hey guys' at a medium pitch next time." Yoli looked at Sakura, San, Kyana and Julia warily.
    
                   "Find any food?" J'dee asked, her stomach rumbling right on cue.
    
                   "Uh…" Kyana held out both hands, which held a small twig, three leaves, a Polo mint and six UFSO's (Unidentified Funky-Smelling Object).
    
                   "Sorry, we got a bit…side-tracked." San said sheepishly.
    
                   "Oh? What by?" Nadia asked out of interest.
    
                   "Nothing important." Kyana said hurriedly, nudging Julia who was about to say something.
    
                   "Dude, what's wrong?" Yoli exclaimed loudly, as Deathdroid began sobbing.
    
                   "I'm pink!" Deathdroid wailed.
    
                   "And yellow." J'dee offered, holding her stomach in hunger. 
    
                   "Besides, you carry it off so well!" Julia insisted.
    
                   "But…it's, just not…" Deathdroid sniffled.
    
                   "Don't worry, dude, I swear we'll get you back to normal. Right guys?" Yoli cheered.
    
                   "Well…"
    
                   "I guess…"
    
                   "Dunno…"
    
                   "I am so hungry!" J'dee whined.
    
                   "See, we're all enthusiastic about it!" Yoli lied.
    
                   "I…suppose…" Deathdroid wiped his nose, which was shaped like a pretty pink flower. ^_^ 
    
                   "There, now let's go see in Green Boy wants some grub." Nadia said.
    
                   "But Piccolo doesn't eat, remember?" Julia reminded her.
    
                   "So? I suddenly forgot." Nadia grinned devilishly as she crept towards Piccolo's tent.
    
                   "So….hungry…" J'dee whined again.
    
                   "Shut up!" Kyana said, thwacking J'dee over the head.
    
                   "Ow." J'dee muttered, rubbing her head. "Do it again, it took my mind off the fact that I haven't eaten nearly all day!"
    
                   "Which reminds me, what time is it?" Sakura asked.
    
                   "Shhh!" Nadia hissed, creeping closer to the tent. "Boo- oh fuck, shitting hell!"
    
                   "Nadia?" Everyone shouted.
    
                   "Are you OK?" Deathdroid asked.
    
                   "Hello?" San called, no answer.
    
                   "So hungry."
    
                   "Nadia, dude, what are you…" Yoli trailed off.
    
                   "What is it?" Everyone chimed, stepping into the tent.
    
                   "A little help people." Nadia groaned weakly. An upside down turban was now squished flat on the floor, the thing she had tripped on. As a result, one of her arms had gone straight through the tent material and poking out of the other side, whilst one of her legs was tangled in the tent rope. Her other arm was in one of Piccolo's spare pair of trousers, which looked rather gross, and a thong on unknown origin was draped across her head. 
    
                   "Well, it seems Mr Asexual is all an act." San grinned.
    
                   "Maybe he really eats aswell! Food!" J'dee grinned, scrambling around, looking for something that even slightly resembled a Big Mac and fries.
    
                   "And I repeat, a little help people. Before The Green gets back." Nadia moaned.
    
                   "Right, you two get some wool." Deathdroid pointed to San and Kyana. "You two get some soap and water." He then pointed to Yoli and Sakura. "And you two get some pebbles." He turned to J'dee and Julia.
    
                   "Oooo! They eat bugs on The Lion King! From under pebbles!" J'dee announced, catapulting out of the tent. "Ooof! Oh, hey Piccolo. I don't think you should go in…too late."
    
                   "Why me?" Piccolo growled.
    
    A/N2: 
    
     New promotion! Yep, read 'Koneka's Excellent Vacation' by dbzmomma, it is sooooo good! It's hilarious and Koneka is such a lucky bitch! Just six chapters into the fic and she's already fucked Vegeta!
    
    The sequel to Ain't Nothing But Magick is out! Yesh! Maybe this time I'll succeed in seducing Veggie. So, for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/src.php?auth=7979****


	63. We're Back With A Thong And Radar

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic. I also do not own 'The Waltons'…thank God.

A/N: Hey everyone! Hope you had a great Christmas! I sure did, new computer and MP3 Player. Ah yes, I love Christmas! Someone said in a review that I need to visualise more. I can't remember whom though O.o Anywho, I don't visualise on purpose. OFUD is not an average fic; it is closer to script form than anything else. The only time I go into huge detail is when it is for humour purposes because, if you hadn't noticed, this is a humour fic. Yea, that's me done.

Here's Chapter 64;

"Black lace, Piccolo?" Yoli smirked, pointing to the thong on Nadia's head.

"Give them here!" Piccolo snatched the undergarment off of Nadia's head and shoved them under his turban. "Besides, they're not mine." He added, causing all the girls to raise their eyebrows.

            "Ooooooooo! Skittles!" J'dee exclaimed happily.

            "What? Where?" Yoli and Nadia demanded.

            "Guys, we were going to tell you…" San started.

            "Just when I thought I was going to die." J'dee began happily munching on Skittles, of the candy variety.

"Oh." Nadia and Yoli said disappointedly. San, Kyana, Julia and Sakura let out a sigh of relief.

            "Skittles, taste the rainbow!" J'dee announced, taking a handful of Skittles. (A/N: A handful of Skittles, hmmm?)

            "I wouldn't mind tasting Skittles' rainbow right now." Nadia sighed wistfully.

            "Hmph, one track mind." Yoli shook her head.

            "You can talk!" Nadia scoffed, before wincing in pain as Piccolo tried pulling her arm out of the hole.

            "You're all obsessed." He stated simply.

            "I'm not!" Deathdroid insisted. "I don't wanna jump into bed with Vegeta, Trunks, Krillin or Yamcha!" He insisted.

            "One word; Paris." Kyana smirked as Deathdroid flushed even pinker that he already was.

            "Fine, Nadia, I bet you can't go longer than me without mentioning, looking or even thinking of Vegeta!" Yoli folded her arms in a cocky manner.

            "You're on." Nadia smirked, yanking her arm so she could shake Yoli's hand and temporarily forgot it was trapped. The tent collapsed and the material covered the whole of Piccolo's group, Piccolo included.

            "Well, that's one way to get out." Julia commented.

            "Guys, I have something to tell you." Sakura said, looking rather guilty.

            "Oh?" Nadia and Yoli said at the same time.

            "Don't you dare!" San hissed.

            "No, tell us." Nadia prodded.

            "Do you brats realise you are having a conversation under my tent?" Piccolo demanded, growling as it began to rain. 

            "Better in here than in the rain." Deathdroid piped up.

            "Vegeta's camp is right next to ours." Sakura spilt.

            "What?" Piccolo, Nadia and Yoli demanded.

            "Who told you?" Piccolo grabbed Sakura and shook her.

            "Uh…we saw…it…" Sakura replied shakily.

            "You knew, Piccolo?" Nadia looked at the Namek in what could only be described as disgust.

            "We sparred. I would go insane just babysitting you brats! Do you realise what you've done?" Piccolo started shouting at Kyana again. "These obsessed freaks will make the rest of this week seem like an eternity!"

            "S-s-sorry." Kyana mumbled.

            "I'm not bothered. He can stay over there." Yoli said.

            "What?" Piccolo asked in disbelief, dropping Kyana on the muddy floor.

            "Uh…yeah, same here." Nadia agreed, catching on. No way was Yoli winning this bet.

            "But…but…" Piccolo stuttered.

            "I. Don't. Care." Nadia insisted.

            "Yea, who cares if Vegeta is practically sitting on my lap, roughing it in the wilderness! His inner-Saiyan shining through, giving him that bad boy edge that we love so much. Who cares if he sleeps naked with no Bulma around?!" Yoli said, her voice rising in pitch.

            "He probably hasn't had any for three days, quite a lot for a Saiyan. He won't be thinking straight, take anyone thrown at him." J'dee mused aloud, looking up in shock as Yoli started sobbing softly, then went into a full-fledged wail and ran into her tent.

            "Oh yeah, she's taking it well." Julia commented.

~*~

            "I will win. I will win. I will win." Nadia chanted to herself, whilst walking around in the rain. Her and Yoli's tent wasn't the cosiest of places right now, what with her best friend going slightly insane at the thought of a naked, horny Vegeta that she couldn't touch right next door. 

            "Have you guys thought of how to get me back to normal yet?" Deathdroid asked, approaching Nadia with caution.

            "Uh…not really. Any ideas?" Nadia asked, glad to have something to take her mind of Vegeta.

            "Find the dragonballs and wish me back?"

            "Ha, yeah right." Nadia scoffed.

            "Why not?!" Deathdroid demanded. "You try being pink and yellow!"

            "That is a good question. Sure, let's find some dragonballs!" Nadia grinned.

            "Don't we need a radar?" Deathdroid asked.

            "If Bulma can make one, I'm pretty sure I can!" Nadia said confidently.

~*~ (5 'radar' parts later)

            "Right, what do we need to do?"

            "You should know, Bulma-wannabe." Deathdroid scoffed.

            "Don't ever call me that again!" Nadia shrieked, holding a twig up to Deathdroid's pink neck threateningly.

            "OK, OK!" Deathdroid held his hands up.

            "Right, if I stick this to this with some Krazy glue and sellotape, it should hold."

            "Where did you find Krazy glue and sellotape in the middle of nowhere?" Deathdroid asked.

            "Don't ask me, ask the author. Hmmm, then if I slot these together and stick this part to the finished part…" Nadia fiddled around with her 'radar' parts, her tongue sticking out of the side of her mouth.

            "That looks very…interesting." Deathdroid commented.

            "It does, doesn't it?" Nadia said proudly. "Right, first thing in the morning we'll go looking for dragonballs, k?"

            "Why not right now?"

            "Because I have to…uh…do something." Nadia said quickly, before scampering away.

~*~

            "Dragon, dragon…" Yoli peeped around a tree, muttering the Dragon Ball Z theme tune as she did not know the Pink Panther one. She could clearly see a bright light on in the campsite, and kicked herself for not noticing it earlier. It was so obvious. "Let's go." She said to herself, skulking into a nearby bush, pausing, then dropping onto her front and crawling towards the light, military style.

            "Night everyone." A female voice sounded around the campsite, with replies sounding strangely like those of 'The Waltons'.

            "Bitch." Yoli muttered, feeling insanely jealous of this girl who had no right being in the Vegeta Group. Once everything had gone silent again, Yoli commenced her little army stunt until she came to a huge tent, much bigger than the others, that absolutely reeked Royalty. Yoli gave a little victory smirk and entered the tent quietly, so as not to walk the sleeping Prince. She tiptoed over to a chair, well, what she assumed was a chair since it was so dark. Strange, this chair was furry. And had a tail. And two beady eyes.

            "Ahhhhhh!" Yoli screamed. 

            "Ow, my tail." The 'chair' whimpered.

            "Pu'ar?" Yoli asked in disbelief.

            "Yoli?" A familiar voice asked.

            "Nadia?" Another familiar voice resounded in the dark tent.

            "Who the hell are you lot?" This time a strange voice.

            "I could ask you the same thing." Light exploded into the tent as a lamp was switched on.

            "Woah." Yoli looked around, seeing at least fifteen girls standing around, most of which were wearing rather provocative clothing.

            "Hey, what are you doing here?" Nadia demanded, climbing out of a trunk.

            "Same thing as you, apparently." Yoli sniffed. "I win."

            "No way! You're here too!"

            "Yes, but you were here before me." Yoli smirked.

            "Damn, I thought my idea was original." DA appeared from underneath a small table.

            "Well, I don't know what you guys think you came from, but I am here to see Vegeta! All of you can get out!" A girl with medium length, straight brown hair, who Yoli recognised as Jesscheaux, ordered the millions of other girls.

            "No way!" A girl named Dani yelled.

            "Why are we here anyway? Vegeta's not all that great. Now Krillin…" Another girl, Julz, muttered, crossing her arms in annoyance. 

            "Cheeky cow! We came from the Piccolo group, we deserve some Vegeta time!" Nadia growled.

            "The Piccolo group? Damn, you are so lucky! He is the best, besides Vegeta, of course."

            "OK, so where is Skittles?" Yoli demanded. "And why does he have Pu'ar in his room?"

A/N2: 
    
    If you like OFUD, then you'll definitely like OFUG-The Official Fanfiction University Of Gundam Wing! Muwhahahaha, I feature in it as well. Spiffy! It's written by DeathdroidMK3, who is really pink and yellow and has a kitty called Fluffy. One, two, three; Awww!
    
    The sequel to Ain't Nothing But Magick is out! Yesh! Maybe this time I'll succeed in seducing Veggie. So, for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; http://www.mediaminer.org/fanfic/src.php?auth=7979. Millions of Vegeta's running around?! I'm there!****


	64. Early Departure

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2****

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Hey guys. If someone speaks to you on MSN, by the name of ElijahIsGod@hotmail.com, it is not me. Some strange person seems to think it must be fun pretending to be me. Poor, disillusioned child.
    
    I am **not** discontinuing OFUD. I realise my updates have been few and far between, but they **will keep coming.**

Here's Chapter 65;
    
                   "Yeah, why is Pu'ar here?" DA demanded.
    
                   "I believe the question should be; 'why are you here?'" A deep voice boomed around the tent.
    
                   "Uh oh." Someone muttered.
    
                   "Wow." A couple more breathed.
    
                   "Well…we heard…voices…yeah, voices." Nadia began.
    
                   "So, naturally, we came to investigate." DA added.
    
                   "And it would seem that Pu'ar was searching through your underwear drawer." Yoli said quickly.
    
                   "What?" Everyone exclaimed, except Yoli.
    
                   "Hey, it could have happened!" Yoli defended.
    
                   "Get. Out." Vegeta said, clenching his fists as a twitch began to form.
    
                   "This is your fault." A scantily-clad girl hissed to her friend as she hurried out of the tent.
    
                   "Is not."
    
                   "I said 'out'!" Vegeta screamed.
    
                   "Nice meeting ya." Yoli directed towards Vegeta before bolting out of the tent with everyone else.
    
    ~*~
    
                   "This trip is officially over. You only have yourselves to blame if it is three days earlier than planned." Piccolo finished his seemingly never-ending speech, greeted by a mix of groans and sighs of relief from where all the groups had gathered together.
    
                   "Thank fuck for that." J'dee announced.
    
                   "There goes my plan for screwing Skittles." Yoli muttered unhappily.
    
                   "I want a real bed." Nadia moaned.
    
                   "What happened to turning back to normal?" Deathdroid demanded.
    
                   "Eeep!" Nadia squealed. "Don't sneak up on me like that!"
    
                   "Well?"  
    
      
    
    
    
                   "Sorry, Deathdroid, but I lost the radar."
    
                   "Oh great, I'll stay looking like a pansy for the rest of my life." Deathdroid sulked.
    
                   "Why not ask Baba to change you back? We're not at a DragonBall Z University for nothing, ya know." Yoli said.
    
                   "She's got a point." DA commented.
    
                   "What can I say? I'm a pointy person." Yoli shrugged.
    
                   "Clouds are here!" Jeril's voice could be heard over the noise of the crowd.
    
                   "Great." Nadia rolled her eyes.
    
                   "Hello Ms Goodyear." An unfamiliar, yet unmistakeable, voice greeted.
    
                   "George?" Nadia asked incredulously
    
                   "Ya know, Nadia, he's not a bit like you described him." DA commented, giving the suit-wearing cloud a once over.
    
                   "And his breath does not stink of alcohol." Yoli said, smelling the cloud. "More likes strawberries."
    
                   "I see you've been sharing my graces." George smirked.
    
                   "Uh…George?" Nadia repeated.
    
                   "Please, Nadia, the gawky open-mouth look is so not you." George sighed.
    
                   "You didn't tell me he was gay." Yoli added.
    
                   "Me neither."
    
                   "I am not gay, this is simply me sober."
    
                   "Damn, I'm not surprised you're an alcoholic then." Nadia scoffed.
    
                   "Reformed alcoholic, please." George sniffed.
    
    ~*~ (Back At The University)
    
                   "Well, it's good to be home." Yoli said, unpacking the last of her things.
    
                   "Yep, but I feel somehow incomplete by not throwing up on the way here. George is an incredibly good flier when not under the influence." Nadia said, a hint of surprise evident in her voice.
    
                   "Nadia…" 
    
                   "Yeah?"
    
                   "How do you feel about cheerleaders?" Yoli asked tentatively.
    
                   "You mean the inflatable tits, peroxide blonde extensions and sugary pop?" 
    
                   "Phew, glad the word 'hate' wasn't in the sentence 'cos you would kill me for what I'm about to say." Yoli laughed uncomfortably. "Well…I signed us up for the cheerleader team."
    
                   "You did what?!" Nadia demanded. "Woah…the Uni has a cheerleading squad?"
    
                   "Well…technically it's a 'Posing Squad'. They have a big national competition and everything."
    
                   "At least Vegeta's teaching it."
    
                   "…I never said anything about Skittles." Yoli said with confusion.
    
                   "Oh, sorry! I just assumed that was why you signed us up…I mean, he's usually the reason for everything else you do."
    
                   "Wow, now that's a compliment!" Yoli beamed.
    
                   "So, who is the Squad captain?" Nadia inquired.
    
                   "Uh…The Ginyu Force. Holy shit, there's a hole in the O-Zone layer!" Yoli said, quickly changing the subject.
    
                   "What?!" Nadia screeched.
    
                   "I know, I know!" Yoli muttered. "I was pretty shocked too, I mean, radiation!"
    
                   "Fuck the damn O-Zone layer! Why the hell did you sign us up with them dickheads?"
    
                   "It was a bet…" Yoli said.
    
                   "Oh, well that makes it alright then!" Nadia ranted.
    
                   "It does?" Yoli asked, a wave of relief washing over her face.
    
                   "Fucking sarcasm, Yoli!"
    
                   "Oh."
    
                   "Is there any upside to this?" Nadia said, trying to calm herself down.
    
                   "Yeah…we get to see Deathdroid and S'rac in leotards." Yoli smirked. 

A/N2: 
    
    If you like OFUD, then you'll definitely like OFUG-The Official Fanfiction University Of Gundam Wing! Muwhahahaha, I feature in it as well. It's written by DeathdroidMK3, who is really pink and yellow and has a kitty called Fluffy. One, two, three; Awww!
    
    The sequel to Ain't Nothing But Magick is out! Yesh! Maybe this time I'll succeed in seducing Veggie. So, for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; . Millions of Vegeta's running around?! I'm there!****


	65. Three Dudes In Leotards

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z-Semester 2

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Many thanks to Joseph, who, without this chapter would not be uploaded. He frequently kicks my arse to update so yay! Oh, and as mentioned before, I don't write OFUD in order for you all to see pretty pictures through my writing, or to set the scene, I'll leave that up to my English coursework. The only thing I aim in doing is making you laugh. If I fail in that, then please, kick my arse. 

Chapter 66:

"I feel like a fucktard." Nadia whimpered, looking down at her new 'posing team' outfit.

"You look like one too." Yoli said, bouncing out of the way so Nadia couldn't punch her.

"This better be worth it." Nadia mumbled, making her way towards the large, green field that hardly anyone entered. This was mainly because the Ginyu Force ate their lunch there but also because the grass was rumoured to contain flesh-eating ants.

"I feel so exposed." Nadia heard someone say.

"Puglins, glad to see you could make it!" Yoli shouted to the moaning figure.

"Oh dear God, it's the spawn of Satan." Another voice sounded.

"S'rac?" Nadia gawped, before erupting into laughter.

"Nadia." S'rac nodded in acknowledgement, wearing a painfully tight pink leotard.

"Hey, I never said you had to wear pink." Yoli said.

"It's my sister's. Unlike Deathdroid, here, I don't have a leotard lying around." S'rac sniffed.

"Oi! I told you, I borrowed it!" Deathdroid yelled.

"Yeah well, thanks to **_you_**," S'rac glared at Yoli. "My sister thinks I've 'finally come out of the closet."

"Your, um, 'assets' are looking kinda sore, guys." Nadia commented.

"Yeah, well, if your genitals were hanging outside of your body and wrapped in a blue, skin tight **_thing _**you'd be sore too!" Deathdroid growled, covering his 'tackle' with his hands.

"Vegeta deals with all the time." Yoli sniffed, earning glares from the two boys.

"Hey, I was pulled into this just as much as you guys!" Nadia held up her hands in defence.

"Well, I don't know about you lot but I think it's great. I feel so **_free_**." Yoli commented, running around with her arms flapping wildly.

"We made a bet with her? Were we mad?" S'rac asked Deathdroid, who was fiddling with the crotch of his leotard.

"Why won't it stretch?" Deathdroid wailed.

"Yeah, like it needs stretching." Nadia snorted.

"Stop looking, pervert!" He retorted.

"OK, glad to see we have some new arrivals!" Captain Ginyu greeted them all, looking around at the students. In total there were Nadia, Yoli, Deathdroid and S'rac as well as a ginger-haired girl and an extremely short, overweight boy.

"Ugh, I did not need to see him in a leotard." Yoli said, referring to the short, fat boy and looking disgusted.

"I'm sure he's a very nice person. You are so prejudiced." Nadia accused.

"New word of the day?" Yoli asked.

"Yep." Nadia agreed, commencing the stretches that the Ginyu Force had started doing.

"And this is the anghurical muscle we're working on." Chase said.

"Dude, he so made that word up." Yoli said.

"Yep." Nadia, S'rac and Deathdroid agreed.

"Yeah, I agree!" A scarily high-pitched voice sounded.

"Who the hell are you?" Deathdroid asked, looking at the ginger-haired girl that had secretly joined them.

"Whatever, keep your little 'club'. Like I care." The girl said huffily, re-joining the overweight boy.

"Okay then…" S'rac sounded.

"Stupid fucking assholes. I'll fucking kill them all. Who the hell does that bastard think he is?" A familiar male voice could be heard cursing all the way through the field.

"Is that…?" Yoli began.

"Joseph!" Nadia said, waving insanely.

"Oh dear god no." Joseph cursed.

"Wow, you look good." S'rac said sarcastically.

"Pink?" Joseph raised an eyebrow

"Shut up!"

"How come you're here? Out of choice?" Deathdroid asked in disbelief. 'Why would anyone wish this upon themselves?' he thought.

"Vegeta made me. I was passing notes in class," Joseph replied.

"He made you come here just for that?" S'rac asked.

"Skittles is a fair punisher!" Yoli stated.

"The notes were about his fat, ugly, prostitute of a mother." Joseph grinned.

"Ah." Everyone sounded.

"Ooooo, the green really matches your eyes, Joseph." Yoli smirked.

"Dude, his eyes are brown." Nadia commented.

"So?" Yoli asked.

"So, what you just said doesn't make sense." Deathdroid chimed in.

"So?" Yoli said again. 

"So, Nadia corrected you." S'rac tried.

"So?" Again, Yoli asked.

"So, you are becoming highly annoying." Joseph muttered.

"So?" 

"Shut up!" They all shouted.

"Woah, guys, chill!" Yoli said, before grinning. "So?" She whispered. "Did you hear that? How weird!" Yoli covered when everyone glared at her.

"You!" Captain Ginyu barked.

"Me?" Yoli asked.

"Yes, you!" He repeated.

"Me?" Yoli asked again.

"Yes, you. Come here."

"Me?"

"Yoli!" Joseph and Deathdroid shouted. Nadia and S'rac slapped their foreheads.

"Oh, you meant me!" Yoli grinned, stepping towards Captain Ginyu.

"Right, I want you to copy me. Then I want you all to copy….uh…" Captain Ginyu looked at Yoli for help.

"Yoli." Yoli offered.

"Yoli." He copied. He then went into what I suppose you could call a pose, except all he did was stick his left arm out in front of him. Yoli quickly followed suit, grinning at how easy this was. The rest also followed.

"Ouch." The overweight boy said as he crashed to the ground.

"Mildred, help Charles III up." Chase ordered, resuming teaching when she had. "OK, same as before. Yoli will follow me, you will follow her." Captain Ginyu said, before sticking his left leg out at a funny angle. Yoli was about to follow when he raised his hand to signal her to stop. He then carried on, swinging his left leg up, whilst at the same time moving his right leg to the left quickly, then throwing his weight backwards and landing on his hands. The Ginyu Force looked at Yoli expectantly. S'rac, Deathdroid, Joseph and Nadia gawked.

"Uh…" Yoli sounded, before screwing up her face in concentration and sticking her left leg out.

"She's not actually gonna try, is she?" S'rac asked in disbelief.

"Hello, this is Yoli we're talking about." Nadia reminded him.

Swinging her legs out haphazardly, and throwing in some kung-fu style arm movements, she swung herself backwards and…..to the side, rolled over onto her head and let out a moan.

"Owwies." Yoli's muffled voice could be heard.

"Amateur." Charles III commented.

"Like you could do better!" Nadia defended her friend.

"I could do better with my eyes closed." He boasted.

"I'd like to see it, Fatso." 

"Fine." The reply came. Charles III stuck out his leg at an odd angle and closed his eyes. Perfectly, he swung both legs at the same time, threw his weight backwards and landed on his hands. Then he opened his eyes. "Told you."

"Does this mean I'm a retard?" Yoli's muffled voice came again.

"I stand corrected." Nadia said, as she and the others, save Mildred, gawked.

"Ya know, I think we're not Posing Team material." Yoli called from her tangled heap.

"Exactly what I was thinking, let's go." Nadia called.

"I can't." Joseph and Yoli said at the same time.

"Why?" Nadia asked. "Joseph, you first."

"I was given this as punishment. No way will Vegetable Head let me skip."

"I'm sorry but, you're just not Posing Team material." Chase said, as he approached the group. "I'm afraid we'll have to let you go."

"I can't believe we got kicked off before we even had chance to walk out!" S'rac said, humiliated.

"Guess you got out of your punishment. What about you Yoli?" Deathdroid called over to her.

"My leotard has ripped in a really dodgy place."

~*~

"Hey guys, I have the perfect idea!" Yoli said, whilst taking a bite of her tuna sandwich.

"No way." Nadia, S'rac, Deathdroid and Joseph chorused.

"You don't even know what it is!" Yoli whined.

"And I don't wanna." Deathdroid shook his head.

"It's cool!" Yoli teased. After about thirty seconds she let out a sigh. "OK, I'll tell you, quit hassling me." The group exchanged blank looks. "A slumber party!" She grinned from ear to ear.

"Excuse me?" S'rac asked.

"I'm holding a slumber party and yourself, Deathdroid, Joseph and Nadia are cordially invited."

"Why the hell would I want to come to any 'slumber party', let alone one held by you?" Joseph asked.

"Cos you love me, I'm cool and I say so." Yoli stuck out her tongue.

"Good reasons." Nadia said sarcastically.

"See you all at eight! Don't forget your PJ's!" Yoli grinned, pulling Nadia behind her.

"Did she just rope us into another freaky thing?" S'rac asked.

"Well, we don't have to go." Joseph said.

"Yeah right, this is OFUD. Of course we'll end up going, for one reason or another." S'rac said.

"I don't know what you two are complaining about. I usually have to order this kinda stuff on my dad's credit card and wait for the bill to destroy it when it comes." Deathdroid said happily.

"What?" S'rac asked.

"Do you think they'll have a pillow fight?" Deathdroid asked nobody in particular, his eyes glazing over as he went off into his own world.

"He is quite possibly the scariest person I've ever met." S'rac commented.

"Ouch, that cuts deep." Joseph acted hurt. "What about me?"

"Close second, Joseph, close second."

"A pillow fight in their undies!" Deathdroid said, apparently thinking all the possibilities up in his mind.

"We're not with him." Joseph told the passer-bys who were looking at Deathdroid as if he were still pink and yellow.

A/N2: 

If you like OFUD, then you'll definitely like OFUG-The Official Fanfiction University Of Gundam Wing! Muwhahahaha, I feature in it as well. It's written by DeathdroidMK3, who is really pink and yellow and has a kitty called Fluffy. One, two, three; Awww!

The sequel to Ain't Nothing But Magick is out! Yesh! Maybe this time I'll succeed in seducing Veggie. So, for all you who like J'dee and her never-ending interactive fics (who doesn't?!) then go here; . Millions of Vegeta's running around?! I'm there!


	66. Save Me, Jeebus

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Finally, people, I have taken this fic of hiatus. I have also got another fic in the pipeline, but I won't get ahead of myself. So, without further adieu, I give you;

Chapter 67

"…And then it went **boom**!" Yoli finished, falling onto her dorm floor in fits of laughter.

"How was that funny?" Nadia asked, looking slightly confused.

"Shut up." Yoli replied, seriously. "Jeebus, when are the others getting here?"

"Well, I'm already here." A voice came from the door.

"Ahhhhh! It's Jeebus! Save me…uh…wow, who the hell is gonna save me from Jeebus?" Yoli asked herself.

"Come in DA, Yoli's a bit excited about seeing Joseph in his pyjamas." Nadia rolled her eyes. "Don't mind her."

"I never do." Came the swift reply.

"Oi!" Yoli shouted from under her bed, where she was retrieving some socks she had left under there for three months as an 'experiment'.

"What are you gonna do with them?" Nadia asked, slightly alarmed.

"My little surprise." Yoli grinned, rather scarily.

"Oooo, a cunning and perhaps evil plan. I wanna know!" DA whined, but earning only a small shake of the head and wink from Yoli. A loud, deafening bang could be heard at the door.

"Do you want to tell everyone about this secret sleepover?" Joseph's voice came from behind the door.

"But pillow fights in their underwear!" This time Deathdroid could be heard.

"Why am I here?" S'rac could be heard.

"Enter." Yoli said, trying to make her voice sound ominous and booming, but ended up sounding constipated.

"I brought a sleeping bag!" Deathdroid exclaimed excitedly as Nadia let the three boys in.

"Clever boy." DA said sarcastically.

"We have cheese!" Yoli added, almost as excitedly.

"So…what do we do at sleepovers?" S'rac asked, somewhat sceptically. This comment earned gasps all around.

"You've never been to a sleepover before?" DA asked, a look of amazement crossing her features.

"Yes, but never one situated in the girls' dormitories of a university for fan fiction writers of DragonBall Z, per say. Have you?" He asked.

"Uh…no." Was the general answer.

"C'mon people, here is what's on the agenda for the first hour." Nadia rubbed her hands together in glee. "If you will all please crowd around the telescope and our first movie will begin."

"This is my favourite!" Yoli added as they all went up to the telescope that was situated at the window. 

"What are we looking at? Girls having pillow fights in their undies?" Deathdroid asked, hyperventilating somewhat.

"No, let me adjust it." Nadia said. "That's it."

"Oh my God!" Deathdroid screamed, recoiling in horror.

"I'm blind!" S'rac wailed, tripping over someone's foot and landing onto the floor with a 'thud'.

"What's wrong?" DA asked, not taking her eyes off of the telescope.

"Yeah, what's…I mean, 'Noooo! That's horrible'!" Joseph cried, turning away from the telescope, albeit reluctantly.

"You three are Peeping Toms!" S'rac accused.

"Huh? It's just Skittles, taking his nightly bath at ten sharp." Yoli said.

"That is wrong." Deathdroid shook his head. 

"Your mum is wrong!" Yoli shouted angrily.

"Even though I don't understand that, I'm sure it was insulting!" Deathdroid shouted. "This is a shit sleepover! I'm going to sleep."

"Good!" DA replied. "You're boring!"

"Why? Because I don't wanna perv on Vegeta?" Deathdroid demanded.

"Pretty much, yeah." Nadia answered.

"Well screw that!" Deathdroid said angrily, before disappearing into his sleeping bag.

"I wish I could." Yoli sighed wistfully.

"Uh…" Joseph muttered, standing in the middle of the dorm. S'rac, it seemed, had fallen asleep promptly upon hitting the floor. Either that or he was unconscious. "I guess I'll…uh…sleep too." He said, staring wistfully at the telescope, yet managing to tear himself away and sink under a duvet.

~*~ Three Vegeta-watching hours later ~*~

The dorm was silent, only the soft, deep breathing of five people could be heard throughout the room. The telescope lay on it's side, where Yoli had kicked it as Vegeta had recently invested in a shower curtain.

Suddenly, two bright eyes opened, unclouded from sleep. It would seem that the person had not actually been to sleep just yet and was waiting. Waiting for something, or someone. The person could be heard shuffling along the floor to a corner, where Joseph slept peacefully. 

A bright light engulfed the room, causing the person to squint to see which arsehole had thwarted their plans by switching on the lights.

"Yoli?" Nadia's sleepy voice came from the direction of the light switch.

"Yes?" Yoli hissed.

"What are you doing?"

"I was going to try and 'snuggle' with Joseph, if you don't mind."

"Where is Joseph?" Nadia asked.

"What do you mean? He's…" Yoli didn't finish her sentence, for Joseph was not in his sleeping bag.

"S'rac?" Nadia's voice came again, laced with confusion and a hint of amusement.

"Mmmm?" S'rac answered sleepily, his eyes still closed, trying to hold onto his dream.  


"Why are you sleeping with Joseph?" She asked.

"What?" Yoli asked in shock.

"What?" S'rac leapt out of his sleeping bag, leaving Joseph there, smiling.

"What's all the racket about?" He asked calmly.

  
"You were…and I was…and we were…" S'rac stuttered.

"Magical, wasn't it?" Joseph smirked as S'rac's mouth dropped a few hundred feet.

"You two did it?" Yoli asked. "Well that explains it! You're the residential gay guy! No wonder you could resist my womanly charms." She said, shooting a glare at Nadia, who snorted.

"I'm not gay!" S'rac said.

"Uh huh, and I'm not…" Nadia was interrupted by a girl's scream and frantic knocking from across the hall. "What the…?" She left the sentence hanging as the four OFUD students scrambled to the door. DA and Deathdroid were still sleeping soundly.

"Help me!" Goku could be seen in his Homer Simpson boxers, hair crazier than usual, banging on the door across from Yoli and Nadia's dorm.

"No wonder he's still out there. They're Cell fans. Despise Kakkarot almost as much as we do." Yoli explained.

"Get lost!" A female voice shouted from the room in which Goku was banging on.

"I'm not gay!" S'rac said, trying to make Yoli listen to him, but she was too interested in Goku's little drama.

"Someone's trying to kill me!" Goku pleaded, holding up a box. "They sent me a bomb!"

"Bomb?!" The four adolescents looked at each other in panic before screaming.

"Don't worry, it already exploded on me." Goku grinned, pointing to two ashen marks on his cheek.

"Dick." Nadia muttered.

"They've been sending me death threats and everything!"

  
"Yoli?" Joseph asked.

"Wasn't me…this time." She smirked.

"Then who?" Nadia asked, confused.  


"About two thirds of the OFUD population?" Yoli offered.

"I don't know why anyone would want to kill me!" Goku said, ignoring the snorts. "But they signed it 'Nee Nuu'."

"Nee Nuu, you say? This looks like a job for Inspector Yoli and her sidekick Nadia!" Yoli said theatrically.

"No way! I'm the Inspector!" Nadia argued.

"Inspect this." Yoli said as she flipped her off.

"I'm not gay!" S'rac called after the arguing girls, flinching as they started pulling each others hair. "Shame, Deathdroid would've loved this." He said as he looked a the sleeping boy.


	67. Intimidation And Peculiar Behaviour

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: Changed my mind, I thought I would actually try and finish this fic. However, there will be only one more chapter after this one and that's it, fin. I just thought it would be better if I gave OFUD some kind of ending, no matter how crap.

Chapter 68

"Poor guy." Deathdroid said and shook his head ruefully as he saw Goku enter the cafeteria, his face looking drawn and the normal grin gone from his face.

"If you wanna sit here, Deathdroid, you better shut the fuck up." Yoli spoke nastily, earning surprised glances from the rest of the Vegeta table.

"Yoli, there's no need to be so touchy!" Nadia reprimanded her friend, equally as surprised as the rest at Yoli's tone of voice.

"Alright, sorry." The red headed girl apologised lowly. "I just don't want to talk about bloody Kakkarot. I mean, really, I'm sure there are better things to talk about, such as Skittles!" Nadia grinned slightly as Yoli said this, but couldn't help but think there was something wrong with her friend. She had been grouchy all week, ever since the sleepover.

 "Fine, I won't mention You-Know-Who." Deathdroid replied rather begrudgingly. Personally, he didn't know why Yoli was getting so uptight. After all, Goku was getting death threats. In his opinion, she should have been jumping for joy.

"Oh! Harry Potter moment!" DA chimed in as she polished off her breakfast, referring to the 'You-Know-Who' comment.

"I hate Harry Potter. Like magic is real." Yoli scoffed.

"I bet that's what you thought about Vegeta and everyone before you came here!" DA replied, quite offended that Harry Potter had been insulted.

"Of course I knew my Skittles was real!" Yoli proclaimed loudly, earning a glare from the whole table. "I mean **our** Skittles!" She quickly covered.

"I sit here too much." Deathdroid shook his head wryly.  "Excuse me, ladies." He nodded to the table which, coincidentally, contained all girls.

"Vegeta fan in denial. How sad." Someone commented.

"Right, I got to go." Yoli announced as she stood. "Detention." She explained once Nadia gave her a peculiar look. "With Bulma." This time she made a face.

"Lucky you!" Nadia commented, laughing slightly at Yoli's expression. "Laters."

  That Evening

 "Long detention!" Nadia commented from where she was laying on her bed as Yoli stormed into their dorm room, obviously not in a good mood. "What's wrong?"  
  
"Huh?" Yoli looked up, as though she hadn't seen Nadia. "Oh, that fucking Bulma." Was all the explanation she gave to her friend, though she really didn't need to say anything else. "Uh, can I use your computer?"

"What? Sure. But why don't you use your own?" Nadia inquired, looking over at Yoli's side of the room. There didn't seem to be anything wrong with it.

"Run out of printer ink. Thanks." Yoli muttered as she promptly sat down and switched the computer on, typing away immediately.

Nadia put the book she was reading down on the floor by her bed and settled underneath her covers. She expected Yoli to add another comment on her detention but after ten minutes of silence, Nadia closed her eyes and attempted to sleep, which proved quite difficult with the consistent typing. Eventually, the noise grew to a lull in the background that eased her into sleep.

    Sunlight streamed through Nadia and Yoli's dorm, awaking Nadia from her deep sleep. Rolling over with a groan and wiping a trail of dribble from her chin, the girl opened her eyes lazily. Rolling out of bed, only to land with a loud 'thump' on the floor, Nadia rubbed her backside.

"OK Yoli, it wasn't that funny." Was Nadia's instinctive reply. It took her a few seconds to realise that there was nothing to reply to, for no one had said anything. Finding it odd that Yoli had not found her best friend falling on her arse funny, Nadia stood up and glanced at her friend's bed. It was empty. Looking at her watch, Nadia was surprised to see it was only 8am. Wearing an expression of bewilderment, Nadia padded into the bathroom, wondering where the hell Yoli was.

     Making her way down to breakfast by herself, Nadia entered the enormous cafeteria. Not bothering to actually get any breakfast and simply deciding to sit at the table, Nadia smiled as a form of greets to the rest of the tired-looking Vegeta table.

   "Where's Yoli?" Nadia asked, only to receive half-hearted shrugs and blank expressions. Early mornings often had this effect on the teenagers of OFUD, especially the Vegeta and Yamcha groups. They were the groups that were more active at night. It was the Goku and Krillin groups, namely, who were annoyingly cheery and incessantly noisy so early in a morning, due to the fact that many of them were tucked into bed by 7pm.

    Peering down at the cafeteria table, Nadia wondered where Yoli had gotten to. She also wondered why she was so bothered. It was unusual for Yoli to go off on peculiar adventures with disastrous consequences. The dark haired girl realised it was because of Yoli's recent mood change. Something was definitely bothering her and, unlike the old Yoli, who would tell anyone and everyone what was on her mind, this Yoli was not talking, not even to Nadia.

    As Nadia became wrapped up in her thoughts, she did not notice a large figure loom over her. She noticed everyone else on the table become even more subdued that usual, which caused her to look up. The huge, intimidating figure of The Ox-King was standing right next to Nadia and something was evidently wrong. There was no usual smiling expression. Lines of anger were etched into his stone cold face. He spoke cleanly and evenly, which scared Nadia even more than his expression. "Nadia Goodyear." He said, placing a heavy hand on her shoulder, his other hand holding a few sheets of white, crumpled paper. "Come with me."


	68. The Final Curtain

The Official Fanfiction University Of DragonBall Z

Disclaimer: This is based loosely on Camilla Sandman's fiction 'The Official Fanfiction University Of Middle-Earth' with her permission. I do not own any DragonBall Z characters mentioned in this fic.

A/N: This is the final chapter of OFUD, ever. Finally, it is complete after a whopping two years! Oh, and this is Chapter 69 (quit sniggering at the back!) I think ff.net has screwed up my chapters. Or perhaps it could be a 'missing' chapter that could resurface some time in the future…who knows?

Quorky: You, obviously, since you are the author.

Shut up!

Quorky: 69…what an appropriate number for you.

Chapter 69

  Nadia sat outside Android Seventeen's office, glancing around at the organised waiting room anxiously. Normally, Nadia would not have been fazed by waiting to see the headmaster of OFUD, but given the circumstances in which she had been brought here she was becoming quite worried. It didn't help that she had no idea as to why she was here and she was almost certain that they had been keeping her waiting so long to psyche her out. Why, she did not know, yet she figured it could not be anything good.

  Her head snapped up at the sound of a door opening quietly. Seventeen stood in the doorway of his office and beckoned her in. Walking past him, she noticed his narrowed eyes and overall unpleasant demeanour.

 "Take a seat." The headmaster ordered monotonously and Nadia complied instantaneously. Seventeen walked behind his own desk and sat down in the grey, plush chair. "I take it you know why you're here." It was more of a statement than a question, which caused Nadia to hesitate before answering.

"Uh…no…" She drawled out.

"Go on, take a guess." Seventeen smiled for the first time since Nadia had entered the office, but it was not a pleasant smile. In fact, Nadia was sure she would have preferred him to continue scowling at her.

"You wanted to have hot, sweaty sex with me?" The dark haired girl grinned foolishly as she said this, realising it was the wrong thing to do and say as soon as she noticed Seventeen's deepened scowl.

"This is not a joke, Miss Goodyear! I hope you realise what you have done is entirely serious, even more so if it had happened in your world. You were given an excellent opportunity in attending this school, yet you continuously disregard rules-"

"But I haven't broken any rules!" It was lie, Nadia knew, yet it seemed small and insignificant. After all, she'd only broken a** few** rules, surely. Seventeen merely raised an eyebrow and opened up his drawer, rummaging through it for a short second. He produced a large, musty yellow file and dropped it onto his desk, where it landed with a deafening 'thud'.

"This, Miss Goodyear, is a log of all the rules you have broken over the duration of your stay at the university." He spoke as he flipped mindlessly through the often crumpled and creased pieces of paper with different scrawling on each one.

"Wow, I would've thought it…" Nadia trailed off as she realised she was thinking aloud, yet Seventeen had heard enough.

"Oh, does this not do justice for your escapades?" Seventeen snarled, obviously highly annoyed. "Well, let me tell you, this is just **your** file. We have had to put together an entirely different one for your united rule breaking with that crazy, red haired accomplice of yours."

Nadia thought it quite strange that no one had ever described Yoli that way, yet it was a perfect description of her best friend. She watched apprehensively as Seventeen pulled yet another file from his drawer, this one a deep red and much thicker than the yellow one. A large hazard warning sign had been drawn colourfully on the front, which offended Nadia slightly, before she realised it had probably been Vegeta. Upon thinking this, her opinion of the small picture changed dramatically, and she noticed how accurate and impressive it really was.

"Painting other students' rooms red, blackmailing pre-teens to take pornographic photographs, trespassing on the forbidden corridor, shouting obscenities in Bulma's, Trunks', Goku's, and Gohan's lessons, encouraging Miss Smelt to make sexual advances towards Cell, not to mention your cloud that often flies under the influence of alcohol…"

"George's alcoholism is not my fault!" Nadia said defensively. "Besides, he's sober now."

"Mhmmm." Seventeen didn't sound convinced. "Starting numerous food fights in the canteen, the huge war between the Vegeta and Goku clubs, wghich I know for a fact yourself and Yolanda were to blame for, almost poisoning Vegeta with some peculiar concoction…"

"Well he shouldn't have made me and Yoli into his personal slaves!" Nadia tried defending herself again, but the headmaster just sat backwards in his chair, a complacent expression on his face that seemed to mock Nadia.

"The fact is, you have had a blatant disregard for the rules since your first visit here. I am surprised that you have not been expelled up until now, but your recent stunt has simply astounded myself and the rest of the staff. We certainly did not expect it." Seventeen shook his head ruefully. "Except Vegeta, he seemed quite proud." The headmaster added in a slight undertone.

Nadia listened intently. _'Expelled up until now?'_ She thought, incredibly confused. _'Recent stunt?'___

Seventeen stood and looked almost regretful. "Your belongings have already been packed, Miss Goodyear. Your cloud will be arriving for you shortly. Let's hope, as you said earlier, he is sober."

"What?" Nadia was still confused and felt she had missed something important. "Are you expelling me?!" She asked in disbelief, her dark eyes widening as Seventeen gave a curt nod. "Follow me, please."

"But I haven't done anything!" Nadia protested.

"Threatening a member of staff with death is a very serious matter, Miss Goodyear. We have solid proof. Lying will not help your case."

Nadia stood in front of the huge gates of the university. The last time she was here, she had been on the opposite side and it had been two years ago. The time seemed to have simply flown by. She had so many memories, yet they were all jumbled and ran together, making the time period twisted and dramatically decreased. The dark haired girl looked down at her luggage. Her life at the University of Dragon Ball Z had been packed tightly into two suitcases, which the headmaster was getting ready to put into tiny capsules.

"I didn't do anything." Nadia said quietly for what seemed like the thousandth time. Seventeen gave a resonated sigh. "Miss Goodyear, every single computer in this university has an individual, unique number. The notes were undoubtedly from your computer."

"But I told you…" She trailed off as a light bulb suddenly switched on above her head, quite literally, yet her mind was too busy to notice it properly. "Yoli!"

"We realised that yourself and your friend always work together, which is why we are waiting for her. She, too, is to be expelled."

"But it wasn't me!" Nadia repeated. "It was** her**!" Suddenly, her voice became very bitter as she noticed a familiar figure walking towards them, with Vegeta and Piccolo on either side of her.

"Nadia, I've told them it wasn't you, but they don't believe me!" Yoli said defensively, her green eyes watery with unshed tears.

"Yoli, I'm being expelled!" Nadia fumed. "Why did you do it? What was the fucking point?"

"To scare the shit out of him?" Yoli asked dumbly. "C'mon Nadia, it's Kakkarot." She shot a glare at Goku. "He doesn't care, he's **used** to it!" She added, oblivious to Goku's shocked and offended expression.

"Stop being a smart arse! I hope you realise what you've done? I don't want to go back! I haven't passed yet! I can't write fanfiction anymore!"

"Nadia, I'm sorry, but-"

"But nothing! You've screwed this up for me! You're so fucking selfish!" Nadia yelled, ignoring reprimands from Seventeen. "I didn't listen to you when you were headmaster, like fuck I'm gonna listen to you **now**."

"You think I wanna go back to my crappy home?" Yoli screamed back, equally as angry. Nadia didn't bother replying, she had noticed the familiar trail of George. Plus, they were zigzagging, which only meant one thing;

"'Allo Nadia me best mate man!" George's slurred words could be heard painfully clear.

"George, you're pissed." Nadia stated.

"Yah, I was boring sober. But now I is extra entertaining for ya journey home! Did I not tell you that you'd make an impact? The first person to ever be expelled! Beautiful!" George sounded positively delighted.

"Cheers, George." Nadia clambered onto her cloud, taking her capsules from Seventeen. It looked like he was going to say something, but decided against it.  Instead he nodded firmly. "The school will be notified of your departures in the morning. I'm sure you both will be missed." He spoke rigidly.

"Laters." Nadia said dismissively.

"Nadia-"

"Forget it, Yoli." The dark haired girl didn't bother looking at her former friend. "I thought we were friends. Best friends." Her voice became sad, quieter. "Home, George." She almost whispered, to which her cloud complied, whooshing away at an alarmingly fast rate.

A Week Later

  Sat at her computer screen, Nadia cursed AOL for a fifth time. It was being painfully slow. Plus, the past week, she had been in a foul mood. No one understood. They thought she had been excluded from a crappy horse riding school, not the best university there ever was, where she could interact with people she felt understood her. Where she was learning things she was really interested in, and where she had met the best people she knew she would ever meet.

   A soft 'ding' brought Nadia's attention back to the screen. She had received an anonymous instant message. She knew it was most likely to be an advertisement for penis enlargement, or perhaps a link to some 'college girl's personal porn site', yet she still couldn't help being curious.

**SkittlesIsTasty****:** Hey

Nadia looked at the simple message for a good length of time. It was possible it could be a coincidence, then again…

**ILuvSpandex****:** Yoli?

**SkittlesIsTasty****:** Damn…the name gave it away, eh?

**ILuvSpandex****:** What do you want?

  Nadia typed this response quite harshly. She still had not forgiven Yoli for being the cause of her getting expelled. In fact, she hadn't heard from her since then.

**SkittlesIsTasty****:** To apologise.

 Nadia contemplated putting something such as 'It's too late', but changed her mind. Another 'ding' interrupted her thoughts.

**SkittlesIsTasty****:** Had a brainwave last night. But first, I have a file to send you.

True to her word, Nadia was asked permission to be sent a file. She accepted and watched the loading bar, quite curious as to what it was. Opening the file, a huge grin spread on her face. There, emblazoned on her computer screen, was Vegeta, in all his wondrous, naked glory in the shower.

**ILuvSpandex****: **Where did you get this?! It rocks!

**SkittlesIsTasty****:** Thought I'd take a souvenir…

**ILuvSpandex**: Wow…

**ILuvSpandex**: So…brainwave?

**SkittlesIsTasty****:** Have you forgiven me?

**ILuvSpandex****:** If you can guarantee more nekkidness…

**SkittlesIsTasty****:** It's a certain!

**ILuvSpandex****:** Then yes!

**SkittlesIsTasty**: Well…I had this dream last night, and it just gave me the perfect idea on how we can smuggle back into the University! We'll need your alcoholic cloud, two orange gi suits and black hair dye for me.

   As Nadia read those words on her computer screen, she grinned widely. Yoli made her feel how she did back in the University and lifted her sombre mood. Typing away on her keyboard, the grin still stayed upon her face.

**ILuvSpandex**: No problem!

A/N2: And that's a wrap!


End file.
